Topic: Please Help Me

Hi Laura,

I am actually going thru chemo right now.  I had a baby on July 23rd and was diagnosed a week later after 3 days of labor with plans of a home birth :) God got me to that hospital, otherwise I may not know about this cancer still. 

Anyways, at first I was mostly upset about not being able to nurse, but that became ok as I went through chemo. My baby girl is a trooper, and she weaned to the bottle wonderfully. I have had 3 "rounds" every three weeks, with my next on Monday. Tired, and thr first few days are the worst,,,but they have meds for everything,and the anti nausea meds work for me. Its doable. :)

Laura, this is not a death sentence. A friend of mine told me that, after her three yrs cancer free :) Its scarey, but its doable. ALLLLL these women are either doing it, or have in the past.

I can say that chemo is no picnic, but even with a newborn I am doing this. And  the loss of my hair was not fun,,,but I got a great wig, and some little hats I wear all around. I am actually into the hats more now, over caring what others may think, and see I am still beautiful without my hair :)

I had 2 tumors in my rt breast,,and one is completely gone already , and the other had shrank from over 6 cm's to 5 cm. And I go for my next ultra sound  on Thursday.

I have surgery next, amd then radiation, then reconstruction. 

But its all ok. Its let me know that whatever life throws at me, I can do it.   You too can do this.

Its a process,,,and yours may look different, but its pretty much Chemo, radiation, surgery, and reconstruction (if you choose)  in which ever order you'll have treatment.  Its all doable, and the fear comes defiantely from "the unknown".   Your going to be ok. 

 I hope it was ok for me to post , I just know I wanted anyone to respond when I first posted.:)  I just wanted  to know I am not alone. Its sooo hard thinking about what it will be like to not be able to pick up my baby after surgery,,,but I too know God is here, and this is all for a purpose.  I also have gotten support on this website, and know its going to be difficult,,,but its doable :)

Thanks for listening and know this is a great place for you :) Your going to be ok :)

Laura

Welcome to the club that no one wants to join!  Last week, I just celebrated my ONE year chemo versary, the anniversary of my LAST chemo! 

No one wants to get chemo, but it IS very.... doable, and that is really the only way to describe it.  You will be given lots of drugs to help with any se's you might have from the chemo treatment.

The worst part is the waiting for the test results, and I found that once I had decided upon a treatment plan, I felt alot better.

Good Luck!  I'll be thinking of you and you are in my prayers.  Please post often, and let us know how you are getting on. 

HUGS and Prayers,

Harley

Hi Laura,

 I'm 10 years out from my first bout with breast cancer and 3 from my second.  I was so shocked and scared the first time that I could hardly speak. It just took awhile for me to get my arms around the word cancer.  Once I did that I was able to get it together and get on with my treatment.  You are going to do well and your kids will too.  Get help wherever you can as you go through treatment but you will be fine.  Keep us posted and I am sending you a cyber hug and blessings.

Petemom

y

Laura,

Hang in there, in some ways, the waiting is the hardest part. You'll get lots of help, support and advice here, so definitely come here often. Hang in there.

Dear Laura,

Very sorry that you have joined the club ... but know that you have lots of excellent company. I remember the shock well, just 3 months ago. The good news is: you found it early, you will get it treated, and you will move on with life. When I got my diagnosis, the doctor didn't even have the good sense to tell me that death isn't imminent; she just told me over the phone on a Friday evening that I have cancer and that her receptionist would call me on Monday if I want a referral for a surgeon (without saying what I need the surgeon for). That was a long and bad weekend. But rest assured, according to everything I have read over the past 3 months, it is more likely that we die within the next 10 years of any other cause but cancer.

Here are a few things I wish I had known in the early days - hope they help:

• Educate yourself about your disease, treatment options, the best doctors available to you, what your insurance will pay, what doctors they'll allow you to go to, your prognosis, and after the initial treatment - what you can do to improve your lifestyle: nutrition, etc
• Here are some links that I found really helpful in learning about BC:

Introduction to Breast Cancer: http://training.seer.cancer.gov/ss_module01_breast/unit01_sec01_intro.html

DCIS: excellent explanation in the first paragraph:

http://www.abbottdiagnostics.com/Your_Health/Cancer-Oncology/Breast.cfm

DCIS - but site has many more topics

http://www.cancerbackup.org.uk/Cancertype/Breast/DCISLCIS/DCIS

Practice Guidelines - help with decision-making - need to register (is free)

http://www.nccn.org/default.asp

Breast Anatomy:

http://training.seer.cancer.gov/ss_module01_breast/unit02_sec02_anatomy.html

uadrants of the Breast

• Get a copy of all your records (mammo reports, labs, etc), especially the path reports, and review them carefully. Look up all the terms that are mentioned in there so you understand exactly what kind of cancer you have and you can prepare yourself to ask relevant questions when you go to the doctors.
• Really know your pathology report and try to understand what kind of BC you have. There are so many different versions and you need to understand what you have in order to make the best decisions about treatment. Not everyone takes the same course of treatment. E.g., my first oncologist said that I will have a lumpectomy, radiation, and 5 yrs of Tamoxifen because I had ‘just DCIS in the right breast' - after more testing it turned to a diagnosis of invasive cancer ... and I ended up with a bilateral mastectomy. For that reason: get a second opinion before making major decisions. See:

http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/path_report/

http://www.oncolink.com/types/article.cfm?c=3&s=5&ss=838&id=9588

http://breastcancer.about.com/lw/Health-Medicine/Conditions-and-diseases/Understanding-and-Dissecting-Your-Breast-Cancer-Pathology-Report.htm

• Take your time with the decision making - there is typically no need to have surgery immediately. You have weeks to make a solid decision (I took 2 months); doctors say one should have surgery within 90 days (that is the time within which tumor cells tend to divide)
• Take the time to find the best surgeon, oncologist, oncological radiologist, whomever is needed - finding the best doctors for you is more important than seeing them instantly. Best means: highly trained, years of experience with your situation, and specialized in breast surgery (not knee or gallbladder surgery). If they are not highly qualified, they can't very well advise you.
• Take control of your health. That means don't just let you doctor call the shots while you just passively nod your head, it is your body and your life. Be pushy (but pleasant) if need be, ask all the questions you have (come prepared), ask about different options, get second opinions (it is amazing how different the answers can be). You are your own best advocate.
• Get a copy of your actual mammograms, look at them and have them handy for review when you are consulting with any other doctors. It makes a big difference if you understand your own data. For example, I was diagnosed with a small DCIS, "the good cancer" and the ‘standard of care' for DCIS is lumpectomy followed by radiation and, possibly, hormonal therapy (Tamoxifen). But once I started looking at my data, I had my doubts that this was the best course: in addition to the small area identified as DCIS, my right breast had many scattered microcalcifications including an area that had not been biopsied but that looked to me (against my bright computer screen) as another potential cluster -which it turned out to be. Now I had two areas of DCIS that were 5 cm apart plus additional microcalcifications. At that point I thought that mastectomy would be the better idea.
• Get a second opinion on your path report; ideally from a university hospital or your local hospital based ‘tumor board'. Tumor boards include multiple specialists: oncologist, surgeon, radiologist, pathologist ... who review your data (mammos, ultrasound, pathology slides) and then give you their opinion on the best course of action. This way you are more likely to get a comprehensive review and a recommendation that is not just the opinion of one person (physicians tend to do what they always do, not what is necessarily the best course of action for each individual patient); and when there are several different specialists reviewing your case you are more likely to get advise that is appropriate for your situation.
• You are entitled to get your pathology slides (mine are now always in my file cabinet, handy for further review) and take them wherever you want them to be reviewed. My second opinion of the slides turned up that I actually had a mix of DCIS and invasive cancer - so, now I had multifocal and invasive, which confirmed my hunch that a mastectomy would be the course of action for me.
• After the initial shock, don't get lost in depression or self pity ... not because that is a bad thing to do, but because you need your senses and energy to take action ... asap! And it has to be the right action, which typically follows some time of exploration of your options (of doctors, treatment options, etc). Thus, be on your toes - treat your diagnosis and treatment as a full-time job, take notes, take a tape recorder or dicataphon to your doctor's appointments, and stay organized.
• Get organized: create yourself a filing system: Medical Reports (diagnostics: mammos, labs, ultrasounds; path reports, doctors reports, etc); BC information, Insurance, etc. It all piles up quickly and will add to your confusion without organization.
• Let people in your life know (well, only those who are smart enough to know that BC is not contagious): you'll be surprised how many people know something about cancer or know somebody who had it and can connect you with a BC survivor. I found in no time nine BC survivors who shared their insights and advise with me, which was very helpful. I even got to look at lumpectomized and reconstructed breasts before making a decision myself. Most of the survivors were very generous in sharing their information. So, contact survivors and find out about their experiences, advice, and what to expect.
• Engage help and say what you need so people don't have to guess ... and give, say, or do the wrong thing.
• You see I've learned a lot in a short time. Hope this helps a bit.
• Cornelia

Thank you Cornelia, wow you really did do all the research.  Just today after I posted earlier, I called my insurance found out what's covered and also called my friends and co-worker's friends and found a lot of BC survivors.  I spoke to one and she is great.  The one surgeon that I'm waiting for is the one all (meaning 4 ladies I know) have choosen that doctor and are recommended by most ob doctors.  So I feel much better knowing that I'll be taken care of as did the other women.  I'm so glad that you broke it down for me.  Funny because I was at Price Busters looking at all these stuff for organizing my files.  So when you mentioned that it was confirmation that that's what I need to do.  Little stuff like that is making me go on with my day.  So thank you again ladies! 

 God Bless each and every one of you! 

Laura  

Laura-

here's a link to famous breast cancer survivors:

http://music.msn.com/music/galleryfeature/celebrity-breast-cancer-survivors/?photoidx=1&silentchk=1&

I tried to post a link from this forum about success stores but had no luck but it's under inspiring stories and the topic is success stories!

I like reading about both long and short term survivors......

God Bless.

Hi Laura,

I am sorry that you had to join our exclusive club, but if you have to be here this board is a great source of support and information.

 I am 44 was 41 when diagnosed with IDC, a 4 cm tumour, an aggressive grade III and 3 positive lymph nodes. This diagnosis can throw you into an emotional tailspin but with family and friends supporting you throughout this journey it makes life a little easier.

I had a lumpectomy with 6 months of chemo, 5 1/2 weeks of radiation and then onto Zoladex injections to chemically shut down my ovaries and a hormonal treatment due to my estrogen postive status.  Treatment is tough physically and emotionally but certainly doable.

I will be a 3 year survivor next week on the 25th and life is once again a "new normal".  I am fretting about everyday worries and am living life to the fullest.  We are never the same once we get a cancer diagnosis but learn to live life again on a different level, one day at a time.

You will get through this, hug your little ones for support and you will get through this, PROMISE.

 Big hugs to you as I remember well how difficult the first few days, weeks and months leading up to and going through treatment were....

Hi Laura,

 I'm waiting to start chemo,hopefully it will be sometime next week,as i had my last test today(a Muga Scan) My chemo drugs have already been ordered and my port is in place.

As the others have said,the waiting is the worst.

One thing we did was buy a small tape recorder and we take it to every appointment. We asked the dr's first if it would be ok to record,as i told them my brain was mush from trying to absorb everything.All of them said yes and that it was a good idea.It's the best thing we did for ourselves,and as far as i'm concerned it was well worth whatever dh paid for it.

Good Luck to you.

Kathi

Laura(s)- I am sorry you are going through this. The initial period after being diagnosed was the hardest for me- very difficult and overwhelming at times. I identify with the whole mix of feelings you describe...depends on the moment as I recall. This site is great for getting support and information. I think most women will tell you that treatment is doable. Once you know the specifics of your diagnosis you can talk with women here who have the same kind of breast cancer. I've found that to be a big help. Wishing you physical and mental wellbeing and strength.