Topic: WAM Just diagnosed with cancer

Like Cathi said, deep breath! It's easy to become overwhelmed right now.  First get all of the diagnostics out of the way so that you've got a better idea of what you're dealing with. Then you can start considering your next steps. Otherwise the "what ifs" will drive you crazy.

Like you, I felt on top of the word physically and emotionally just before I was diagnosed. I felt like I was in tip top shape, ate well, was a good weight, had no family history, got annual mammograms and then -- how the heck did Stage 3 sneak up on me?

Try not to look at statistics or the prognosis, because those numbers are based on what medical science did for women 5-10 or more years ago. Today you get the benefit of the newest treatments, which promise even better outcomes.

Sorry you had to join us on this journey, but it IS do-able. My advice is to create a support group. Friends and family, as well as a medical team you trust, will be your biggest asset.

Ameron, so sorry you've had to join the club that nobody wants to belong to.  But you've found a wonderful source of support and information on this site.

Yes, do try to take some deep breaths.  You will get through this one step at a time.

Start making a list of all your questions...........take them with you to your next appt.  And if possible, don't go alone..........it's good to have someone else take notes of the answers. 

Gentlest of hugs.

Hi Ameron, hope your still reading this post - I wanted to tell you that Susan Cheek has a great support group/s and counselor .  Right directly across the hall if you go in there  you will get some very good assistance.  Again please PM me if I can help in anyway,  I am a work from home gal  come and go as I please,  we are neighbors and I am only about 15 minutes from Powell,I would be VERY HAPPY to help in anyway I can.

BEST WISHES.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

i was wear you.. - what a sudden shock.  it's so devastating at first.. to cry and cry.. and worry.. gosh.

I'm in my second round of chemo.. and have just a bit of soft sparse hair.  I am at the place tho, where i can feel really beautiful with different makeup.. people stare.. but not because i have hair, because if have eyes from outer space. (liquid eyeliner)

Treatments have come a long way... i expect to last.

It's been a year since my diagnosis and I'm happy... pretty much the same person i was before except i think about cancer all the time.

I'm still numb.  diagnosed 5/29 biopsy report said "infiltrating carcinoma w/ lobular and ductal features, grade 2/3 no definate in-situ components seen.   Went to see surgeon, had MRI friday...waiting for results.  I have oncologist appointment next Monday.  My surgeon said that I would have surgery by the end of this month.  As the days go on, I seem to be getting more scared then the day before.  If I have mastectomy how do I know reconstruction is right for me?   Everyone keeps telling me that I'm too young not to.

Ameron:   I am two years out from the same diagnosis as you, with no hint of trouble or family history.  I got lucky; the tumor, although large and in 14 of 22 nodes, was contained, and I only had a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation.  I am doing absolutely fine now, my hair has grown back more thick and luxurious than I've ever had hair before (I agree with Susie above; bald is very liberating and can be fun actually!), and all the terror, pain, and disbelief are gone.  We are like marines, honey; women are so very much stronger than we are given credit for.  We adapt, we improvise, and we overcome (there's a fourth one there, but I forget what it is..)   We all here are SURVIVORS, and you can do it too.  I pray for all my BC sisters every day, and you are added to the list.

Hello Everyone. I am new here. Personally I wished I wasnt here at all but I bet everyone wishes that. I just hope I can find my way back here. My life has been insane and more insane to say the least.. Between my ex husband taking my child and not bringing him back,being layed off my job, and this breast cancer, I am on pins and needles and do not know which one to fight first... Realistically speaking I have to fight the breast cancer first and the ex all at the same time..I am so overwhelmed and then they tell me I am that Herp 2 positive with very aggressive stage 111 breastcancer. Am I going to make it through this? I am not even sure anymore... One blessing in all this is I am going through MD Anderson and thats the only blessing in this....My treatments begin in three days. They tell me we will begin the iv injection with chemo and Herceptin given once a week for 12 weeks, after the 12 weeks then I get the three chemos IV injection once every three weeks for another 12 weeks, then after that surgery,then after that radiation. They said this one is absolutely necessary with a 90 percent survival rate. I am so overwhelmed. I am remarried but we really need both incomes and I cant even function well enough to figure out how to do this. When I apply for jobs they dont want me because of the cancer.Its more like well contact us when your better,right now we need someone who can be here all the time without the risk of lost time. So I have been having alot of ups and downs with this and treatments has not even started yet. They say the key is to stay positive but its hard when you have to fight your ex just to get your child back when he is like a rabid pit bull fighting at the end of the chain and a lost job...So what do you do... It's like Breathe,step,breathe,step,breathe,step, all the while the ex is hoping you'll die just to get his way.. It's no fun...Well now I stepped in to here and welcome any advice.... Forced smile....

Lonestar:

When I was dx with stage 3 triple negative VERY aggresive cancer, I was unemployed. I was lucky that I was paying for health insurance so that was taken care of but like all of us, we need money to survive! I spent a lot of time researching and planning and this is what I put together.

The first thing I had to digest was that this was going to be the BIGGEST battle of my life. And this battle takes time (plan on 2 years). And it takes strength and focus. So I decided not to work.

I reviewed all my finances and eliminated/reduced expenses. And I filed for Social Security Disability Insurance. It takes time and maybe in your case, you will want to hire a lawyer (there are many that will work your case and when you receive the back pay check, they take a percentage). In most cancer cases, they get approved and if you work fast and hard on your case, you will have that income. You can also apply for SSI which is based upon your financials and may give you a check earlier than SSDI. You are legally allowed to make $900 a month at a job and not be penalized. I would also apply for foodstamps and medicaid if you do not have health insurance.

In regards to your child...can you find an advocate in your family to help you be your voice to fight and get him back? I would think that if a judge knew of your situation, they would reconsider custody and give you 50/50.

Make sure that you get your medical records for both SSDI and for your custody case. They will be your proof that you deserve both in your life!

 I know that things can feel SO overwhelming and you don't even know where to begin. And when you look at the whole picture, you can feel both emotionally and physically exhausted. And all of this just plain sucks. But I promise you that if you fill your life with love, future plans, and stay in the moment, you will find your path that will bring you to the other side.

LizzyGirl15