Mom's spinal tap recently came back positive with brain mets - they're calling it meninges cancer. Mom's symptoms were vomiting, headaches, loss of memory and balance. To make matters worse, she was given too much Decadron (4mg every 12 hours) which caused delirium and insomnia ( steroid psychosis) for three days. This wore off but Mom's still in the hospital (16 straight days) and back on 2mg of Decadron once a day in the morning, which is alleviating some of the head pressure, we're told.
Currently mom is extremely weak, bedridden and not talking, unless asked a question. She also sleeps well and seems to have awareness of her surrounding.
Since she's only able to lie on her sides due to head pains when on her back, her radiologist said mom would need anesthesia in order to remain motionless for total brain radiation treatments. Also, the resident Doc in her care has all but pronounced her dead and wants to literally (it seems) kick her out with no radiation, and to a hospice.
At first the radiologist agreed to begin the 10-day cycle of radiation but recently changed her mind, concurring with the resident Doc that radiation will not be beneficial since she only has ‘months to live'; the radiologist was obviously influenced by the resident Doc.
Should we demand radiation treatment or get mom to another hospital?
We just wanna give mom a fighting chance.
mom's ER-/PR-/HER2+ with story here: http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/8/topic/739724?page=1#idx_3
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Paula513 Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 26 |
Sep 11, 2009 07:57 am
Paula513 wrote:
I am so sorry for your Mom's plight. Will the rads alleviate some of her discomfort? I hate to raise this issue but can this possibly be due to her insurance company's protocols?More often than not, they are behind such decisions. You need to talk frankly with the doctors and/or a third party such as a Health Advocate. |
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Makraz Joined: Sep 2008 Posts: 4,014 |
Sep 11, 2009 08:06 am
Makraz wrote:
Thinking of you and praying for you and your mom. May God bless you all. Linda Thanks to all my sistahs for helping me get through this hell. started Tamox 10-08 Dx at 42 y.o.
Diagnosis: 6/3/2008, IDC, <1cm, Stage I, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- |
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Survive Joined: Nov 2008 Posts: 43 |
Sep 11, 2009 12:52 pm
Survive wrote:
You guys should do what you feel best. We were blessed with my mom's Onc. He supported anything we wanted to do. Even when things were not looking good he told us he would do whatever we wanted (legally that is). He said if Mom wanted to quit treatments he would honor that and if she wanted to keep on going he would support her decision as well. It seems that too many Doc's are too willing to throw in the towel. Just look at those people who went against what the Dr.'s told them and they bounced back. Which left the Dr's. dumbfounded. I wish you luck and keep the faith! |
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Jadai Joined: Sep 2008 Posts: 169 |
Sep 15, 2009 10:19 pm
Jadai wrote:
I am so sorry for what you are having to deal with. I just lost my mom to Inflammatory Breast Cancer and it is so hard. It is hard when you have to make the decisions, hard to see her suffer, the stress is so enormous! All I can say is that you have to do what your gut and heart tell you. My mom wanted to fight and that she did. She had radiation up until 8 days before she passed. Your mom will tell you what she wants and all you can do is support her. Spend as much time with her as you can. Again, I am just so sorry that you have to do this. It is one of the hardest things you will ever do in your life....as I'm sure you already know. Please feel free to PM me any time. |
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ellzmom Joined: Mar 2009 Posts: 20 |
Oct 6, 2009 09:19 am
ellzmom wrote:
Current Dx: 4/2008, Stage IV, Grade 3, ER-/PR- and HER2 Equivocal
Diagnosis: 7/23/2007, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 3, 0/0 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2+ |
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Paula513 Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 26 |
Oct 6, 2009 12:10 pm
Paula513 wrote:
I am so sorry, ellzmom. |
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EGAL Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 468 |
Oct 6, 2009 06:46 pm
EGAL wrote:
My heartfelt condolences to you and your family. Ellen EGAL 10/06 dx'd with IDC Stage 3, 10/08 brain mets
Diagnosis: 10/19/2006, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IV, Grade 3, 15/17 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2+ |
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j414 Joined: Jun 2009 Posts: 209 |
Oct 6, 2009 06:53 pm
j414 wrote:
Ellzmom, I'm so sorry for your loss, your mom was a strong woman and I'm glad she had her equally strong family taking care of her and surrounding her with a lot of love during her battle. Best, J Diagnosis: 4/2009, <1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- |
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Bitsy Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 10 |
Oct 14, 2009 11:43 pm
Bitsy wrote:
I am so sorry to hear this. May God Bless you& your family. Your Mom will always be with you, remember that .....She is in your hearts, your memories, everything she has taught you & guided you through. It will be hard, every holiday, birthday, etc, but it does get better and after the grieving process, you will find acceptance and peace. She is in God's hands now, looking down on all of you. Make her proud, tell wonderful stories of things you all shared, laugh, keep her alive in your home. It will help you, your family and your Mom... God Bless! Bitsy
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spar2 Joined: Jan 2004 Posts: 6,036 |
Oct 27, 2009 06:40 pm
spar2 wrote:
Another bright angel star in the sky. Bless your family. www.spar2.multiply.com Lets help make each other's life better
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Fitztwins Joined: Dec 2004 Posts: 7,731 |
Oct 27, 2009 07:28 pm
Fitztwins wrote:
So sorry ellzmom. Cancer sucks, some times it takes the person fast, and sometimes not. Hard to tell. May you find peace. Wash away my troubles, wash away my pain, with the rain of shambala
Diagnosis: 12/12/2004, IDC, Stage IV, Grade 2, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2+ |
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ellzmom Joined: Mar 2009 Posts: 20 |
Oct 27, 2009 09:29 pm
ellzmom wrote:
From the bottom of my heart, thanks all, for the encouragement!! I appreciate every single word you write. You all are a very special breed. And I really didn't know what life was about before this cancer experience; It's as if life was just a dream that I'm only now waking up from. Love you all! -ellzmom |
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Annie62 Joined: Jan 2005 Posts: 320 |
Oct 28, 2009 02:52 pm
Annie62 wrote:
Elizmom-I'm so sorry you lost your mom. I too am one of seven (and have a daughter named Elizabeth). Witnessing their suffering andlLosing a parent does change your life in a major way. My mom has been gone for 5 years and my dad has been gone for 12 and just last night I had a dream about them.We were getting ready to go to my neices wedding (she'll be married next September). I didn't wake up sad, but happy about having such a nice dream about them. I wish you and all of your siblings the best. Stay close and treat each other right to honor your mom. Best, Annie Dx 11/2004 Stage IIIc IDC Grade 2 11/19 nodes, ER+/PR+ Her2-
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chainsawz Joined: Sep 2008 Posts: 259 |
Oct 28, 2009 04:50 pm
chainsawz wrote:
I am so sorry you lost your wonderful mother. Her beautiful spirit shines thru you :> Lisa -mets to lungs & brain.....the weakest step toward the top of the hill, toward sunrise, toward hope, is stronger than the fiercest storm.
Diagnosis: 7/21/2008, IDC, 3cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2+ |
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Irina Joined: Feb 2008 Posts: 699 |
Oct 31, 2009 11:25 pm
Irina wrote:
I'm sorry about your mother. I know what you feel. My mother died from BC in 1995. I still feel pain. PRAYERS and (((HUGS))) Dx 2/2004, 4cm, Stage IV, 5/0 nodes, mets ER+PR+HER2-
Diagnosis: 2/2004, IDC, 4cm, Stage IV, 5/0 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2- |
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