Diw

Thanks for all your comments!  Julie you have described it so well I know you feel my pain.  It does seem to be a confussing issues. I received three different answers from the same office in the same day.   The techs said. "that is not a symptom of radiation" with such assurity that I was annoyed. The nurse said the tenderness is a symptom but could not explain the reason.  She was most sympathatic and suggested an anti-inflamatory.  The Dr. said it was from the lumpectomy and all "the little nerves were waking up."  Hum I thought... Prior to the first rad tx, I felt back to normal and was quite pleased that all the little nerves had begun to work right - so was my husband. 

The nurse was most helpful and the Advil has helped but I don't like taking anything.  I also increased exercise - despite the pain - and this seems to have helped.  Keep climbing those stairs Dawn - Just don't bounce!  

Today I have my 4th treatment.  I shed a few light tears the first two days during treatment.  The invasiveness and the markings on my body have been most upsetting.  I don't like people touching my breast.  The tech's are professional and well meaning.  However they don't know how to just sit with, or hear saddness.  Like many people it is clear that they don't like how they feel when I am sad and there attempts to convince me to feel otherwise left me feeling as if I am ungrateful for how lucky I am to have such a mild case and for the availability of such technology.  It is as if I must now "buckle up" and take the medicine. 

Fortunately I do have people in my life who will can sit with saddness and hear my words without trying to convince me into another way of feeling.  I know that this too will pass but for now I am sad.