I just found out last Thursday that my mother has stage 3 breast cancer and it has spreed to her lymph noids. She has gone over 2 years without treatement for religious purpose and I am having a very hard time dealing with that. She now has to deal with aggressive chemo for the next four months then surgery and then chemo again. I have no idea what to expect, how will she be. Where can I find her a wig when she looses her hair. Is it all right for me to be frustrated. I am told that I have to move forward and not look at what she should have done. What should my family expect, how can we help her get through this. I have no clue. Any suggestions.
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jpann39 Joined: Dec 2006 Posts: 2603 |
Apr 15, 2008 01:13 pm
jpann39 wrote:
I very sorry to hear about your mom :( Yes it is ok for you to be frustrated but then on the other hand, yes you need to not look back....it does no good to stew about things that you cant change!!!!! I didnt have chemo so cant help on any of those questions but I would guess she will need you to be there, help with cooking, housework, driving things that she wont feel up to doing while in threatment....let her lead the way on what she needs.....I found that when people asked what I needed I had idea what to tell them so always said "nothing".....dont make your mom do that.....when you see something that needs to be done, dont say anything just quietly do it for her....I found that the most helpful from my daughter.... Keep posting here, you will have many replies with things that helped others... Hang in there, you will do fine for your mom..... Jule 'Life may not be the party we hoped for...but while we're here we might as well dance!!!!"
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snowyday Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 1244 |
Apr 15, 2008 01:18 pm
snowyday wrote:
You can get wigs at most cancer clinic's ask the ACS or CCS volumteers. I got wigs on loan but I didn't like wearing them. It's hard to say what to expect everyone is different. Be there for her with drives, help with cooking and cleaning and don't offer just do it. I was bad if someone offered I would say no, foolishly, then regret it. So I loved when my sis or a friend would just come in and do it. Let her know about this site maybe she can find a thread she is comfortable with there is a thread for religous people if that will help her. When she starts chemo make sure she drinks lots of water and when she has complaints jot them down, my sis did this for me my chemo brain was bad so my sister would always take notes even from phone conversations. And she was my alternative for the hospital so if they couldn't reach me they would call my sister and she would let me know. Your a great daughter for asking this I wish you and your mom the best. PN
Dx 5/18/2007, IDC, 3cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, / nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2- |
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