How I Managed Social Anxiety After Breast Cancer

The lady with the sultry voice on the navigation system in our car announces that we will arrive at our final destination in 5 minutes. Suddenly and quite unexpectedly, my heart starts to pound and I begin to sweat. I silently try to calm myself down but after a minute or two of trying, I turn to my husband and say, “Dan, I’m not sure …

Sex Matters: Mindfulness Meditation and Sexuality

There has been considerable public dialogue about the practice of mindfulness, described by experts as “nonjudgmental, present-moment awareness.” Although traditionally associated with Buddhist philosophy, anyone can incorporate mindfulness techniques into their daily activities or in their expression of sexuality.

Mindfulness has been used for a variety of different conditions including depression, anxiety, pain, and eating disorders. Scientific research shows that mindfulness causes brain waves to …

Choosing No Reconstruction — Are You the Only One?

If you’re facing a mastectomy, you may be surprised to find that virtually everyone expects you to have reconstruction. Your doctors, your friends, and even your family may believe that without reconstruction you won’t be happy and you won’t feel whole or feminine. But what if you don’t share these concerns? What if you don’t think reconstruction is right for you?

Perhaps you want to …

Like Mother (in Law), Like Daughter (in Law)

When I was facing a bilateral mastectomy, I had a wonderful role model — my mother-in-law, Reggie, who lived without breasts (and without reconstruction) for over 50 years. Reggie was a striking woman with dark wavy hair and flawless skin. She wore loose, flowing apparel, often accented by colorful scarves. The loose clothes were necessitated by severe lymphedema that developed in one arm after surgery …

Living a Breast-Free Life

When I first met my mother-in-law, in 1972, she had recently recovered from her second mastectomy. She was only 46 at the time. She’d had her prior mastectomy at age 31. Reconstruction wasn’t an option back then. I remember feeling sorry for her, but also marveling at her positive attitude. She looked great — she wore breast forms and, had I not known about her …