Topic: Anyone else really really hate pink ribbons?

Forum: Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts — Meet and support others who are affected by these issues around anxiety, depression, and other emotional effects.

Posted on: Oct 29, 2010 05:56AM - edited Aug 20, 2013 10:02PM by deadlanguages

Posted on: Oct 29, 2010 05:56AM - edited Aug 20, 2013 10:02PM by deadlanguages

deadlanguages wrote:

Maybe it's just me but I feel like I'm constantly dodging the Pink Ribbon Brigade since my diagnosis. No matter how much I explain to them that I'm not interested in the marketing of breast cancer, people still send me pink ribbon swag. My response is "If you want to really help someone with breast cancer, it's a lot less helpful to wear a pink ribbon than to just go over and do that someone's laundry or housework."

I understand that people mean well, but holy crap - I really don't want any part of it and I can't seem to to make people understand that when they bring it up. 

Additionally, my identity is not "breast cancer survivor". Why do people do this? I have athlete's foot every year but you wouldn't call me an athlete's foot survivor. I also had flesh-eating virus when I was fifteen which made me far sicker than the cancer (four weeks in the hospital, thanks!), but it's also not part of my identity.  I actually get viscerally angry when I hear people refer to me as a "survivor" as though it's part of my name. To me, breast cancer was just a sickness I had. I am being treated for it and I had the sucker cut out.  It might come back but until it does, it's simply not who I am.

I've had to stop talking to some people I've met online who had breast cancer because - DEAR GOD - it is all they ever talk about! One woman I know - it has been FIVE YEARS! Surely she has had other things happening in her life since then. I just couldn't take it anymore.

When I was first diagnosed, the very second thing that happened to me after I spoke with my breast surgeon was my being dragged into a room at the hospital where I guess they hold support group meetings, and meeting someone who started lecturing me about meditation and visualization and pink ribbon walks, and being handed a giant totebag full of cancer swag. I'm totally serious. The friend who accompanied me to this meeting was a little bit horrified on my behalf, especially since she knows me well and knows that this approach was something i would run screaming from. I felt like I was being mentally assaulted. Surely a better approach would be to not assume that everyone shares the same feeling about support groups and pink ribbons, etc. 

Does anyone else feel this way? Am I the only one? I really don't mean to be insensitive but I feel like I can't be the only one who feels this way about the marketing of breast cancer.

Dx 6/30/2010, IDC, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+, HER2-
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May 9, 2012 05:43AM kicks wrote:

I HATE PINK! I have not owned or worn anything pimk since I was old enough to pick my own clothes - except in Oct since DX. Actually my pink clothes consist of a fleece pullover and a fleece poncho that have pink ribbons on then. I do wear them a fair bit in Oct as I feel if I can get someone to think or ask questions (which some do) - that's great. If someone doesn't want to see it - don't look. Oh yeah I do have a couple of 'Tough Enough To Wear Pink' Tshirts (the proceedsof these go to the CCI I deal with) as do Hubby, Son and his GF. I can't think of anyone who has given me anything pink because they know I hate and always have hated the color for itself alone. Hubby and Son wear 'Tough Enough To Wear Pink' wristbands all the time - their choice, I never asked them to. Actually, they have met several, both men and women who asked them questions. Some they have given the CCI number to, some the local ACS number to, some their cell number to and some my number to. I have met some very nice women and men that I wouldn't have if they hadn't been wearing their pink wristbands.

(OT - I wear an OD cammy wristband that says "She Served Too". How Women Veterans are thought of and treated is very near and dear to my heart.)

I do dislike the hoopla and those who use pink ribbons for personal income BUT if one person is helped by seeing it then that's a lot more important and someone selfishly enriching themselves. They will ultimately meet their Higher Power and have to deal with/explain to Them.

Dx 8/7/2009, IBC, Stage IIIC, 19/19 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 8/25/2009 AC Surgery 10/21/2009 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right); Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right) Chemotherapy 11/11/2009 Taxol (paclitaxel) Radiation Therapy 2/4/2010 Breast, Lymph nodes
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May 10, 2012 08:10AM - edited May 10, 2012 08:13AM by my2boys

I hate the pink ribbons!!!  Whenever someone gives me a pink ribbon, bracelet, pin, tote bag, book, teddy bear, ANYTHING...I promptly throw it in the garbage as soon as I get home....just hate it to death~~~~

Mother of one of the boys on my sons soccer team had breast cancer a few years ago.  She makes the little boy wear pink soccer socks instead of his uniform socks.......it turns my stomach.

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Jul 4, 2012 08:36PM chemoangel wrote:

No...pink became my favorite color when I was diagnosed, during, and even after treatment. I wear pink because it empowers me. I wear pink for all other suffering through breast cancer, I even had a pink ribbon party for my Birthday...:) because that's when I had my surgery..the day before my Birthday. 

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay then it's not the end"
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Aug 1, 2012 11:24AM KelpieAU wrote:

I don't like them at all. However I have a 12 year old daughter who takes great comfort in anything to do with the pink ribbon. She proudly bought a pink finger bun from Bakers Delight and filled in my full name on the 'pink lady' that she subsequently hung on the wall of the bakery - then facebooked a photo and tagged me in it ! I cringe but if it helps her be more comfortable with the situation then that's OK with me . . . however I take a wide berth of anyone selling pink ribbon stuff at the shopping centre.

"You only live once, but if you do it right then once is enough" Dx 5/2009, DCIS, <1cm, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/0 nodes Dx 4/2012, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 4/9 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+
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Aug 10, 2012 02:59PM kyliet wrote:

I am sick of pink too. It is a bit like the food that made me sick during chemo, I never want to see it again. So of course I tried to dye my hair when it started to grow - and it turned pink. Not happy.

When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life you have a 1000 reasons to smile. Mulitfocal, ECE, lymph. channel invasion, Chemo. RADs. Arimidex. Monthly Zoladex. Dx 11/11/2011, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 3/26 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Aug 10, 2012 04:16PM fredntan wrote:

Aghhh count me in too as a pink hater.

Had a good friend start raising money for a upcoming 60mile 3 day komen walk before i was dx. I seriously think she has dropped off face of earth. How does displaying a save the tatas on your car even help?

MBC bone mets, afinitor,aromasin,xgeva Dx 8/3/2011, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 13/17 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 9/8/2011 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 3/28/2012 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 10/7/2012 Reconstruction (Left): DIEP flap; Reconstruction (Right): DIEP flap Surgery 4/2/2013 Reconstruction (Left): Nipple reconstruction; Reconstruction (Right): Nipple reconstruction Dx 10/2013, Stage IV, mets, HER2- Chemotherapy 11/19/2013 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel), Fluorouracil (5-fluorouracil, 5-FU, Adrucil) Hormonal Therapy

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