Meet other women who are similar in age and dealing with age-appropriate issues.
Posted on: Feb 7, 2009 05:29PM
I am an "older" woman with breast cancer (I was diagnosed at 65 and am now 66). I notice that most of the posts seem to be from people younger than I am (often by quite a bit...). I'd love to "talk" with others my age, exchange info about their diagnoses, effects on their lives, etc. I see that there is a forum for young women.
Someone suggested that maybe it's that older people aren't so computer-savvy or aren't used to being in online discussion groups. However, for those who are, it would be great.
Posts 33901 - 33930 (34,864 total)
Mar 16, 2019 01:42PM - edited Mar 16, 2019 01:42PM by MCBaker
I am 69, and six months have passed since that mammo. Can I blame mammograms?
Mar 16, 2019 01:45PM nanette7fl wrote:
Hi elderberry and welcome. Sorry you have to be here but I know you'll like this lively group!!
CarolH I hope you have a wonderful evening out with your hubby!! What a nice treat
Keywest glad your feeling better! Honestly I loved your after surgery note...made me giggle
Mar 16, 2019 03:12PM IllinoisLady wrote:
Elderberry -- I like your name too/two. Had to stop and think what it actually made me think about which was believe it or not, gooseberries. They are something I really love, but if you accidentally try a green one your mouth won't recover ( un-pucker ) for a month. Anyway I am glad you found us and hope you will check in a lot. Don't tell anyone, but we do talk about ' you know ' the c word here now and then. It is a great place with wonderful people and has been on my favorites list for a very long time now.
Mar 16, 2019 05:01PM Beaverntx wrote:
Elderberry, welcome. Let us know how we might help on your journey. Great place for support and information.
Mar 16, 2019 08:45PM jo6359 wrote:
Carolh- enjoy your night out on the town.
Mar 16, 2019 09:10PM ChiSandy wrote:
Welcome, Elderberry, from one 68-yr-old to another.
Keywestfan, might I interest you in some gelato at Frio next door to Blind Faith after lunch? I’ll PM you when I get back to Chicago.
NOLA seems to have the same crappy weather right now as S. Central TX, though it did dry out today and might hit 65 tomorrow and 70 on Monday. We’ll be flying home Tuesday night to temps in the 40s, which is an improvement over the last couple of weeks.
Had a personal best yesterday: “closed all the rings” on my Apple Watch, in fact overlapped them (activity, exercise, standing). 12,000 steps—never did that before! (Of course, reaching Midway at 6:30am might have had something to do with that—I normally sleep till the crack of...10am). Did the Irish Channel St. Patrick’s parade this afternoon, which was a hoot and a half
Mar 16, 2019 09:24PM keywestfan wrote:
ChiSandy- you’re on for Frio. Actually, though I was at Blind Faith tonight-not exciting- and am often at the Murphy Fit? shoe store, I’m a Frio virgin. I have the first Apple Watch, but never really got the hang, because of having to have my iPhone on all the time to connect with it. Prefer the Fitbit Charge 2, but then I’m way behind in knowledge about newer Apple Watch versions. Will show u my Fitbit if you’ll show me your watch. Enjoy the rest of your time in warming up NOLA
Mar 17, 2019 09:27AM IllinoisLady wrote:
May God grant you always...
A sunbeam to warm you,
a moonbeam to charm you,
a sheltering Angel so nothing can harm you.
Laughter to you.
Faithful friends near you.
And whenever you pray,
Heaven to hear you.
- Irish Blessing
Mar 17, 2019 09:50AM IllinoisLady wrote:
There is a lovely sun outside and it will be another gorgeous day. Our temps. appear to be holding well and will see an increase starting soon. Definite that Spring is doing all it can to work its magic. It is my time of yr. Our Rec Center is closed on Sunday so I will likely take a walk around here and there outside today. We have very light traffic out here in our area so it is an almost perfect place. As well some gentle inclines here and there to 'help' you work just a little. Not too strenuous, but putting some challenge, even if small. We use to try and walk a couple miles a day, but haven't done that for a long while. I'm not sure Dh could do what we use to and not sure I could either though it would be much easier for me I do think. I'd have to work up to it though.
Will go back to do Buddy and Mooch and at some point my trip to Walmart will have to take place. Sigh !!! At least as of late I've not had to go everyday so I guess I shouldn't complain.
I hope you all have a stunning day.
Mar 17, 2019 09:39PM Elderberry wrote:
So good to hear from all of you ladies. It gives me a little courage. I go between optimism and despair. Awful to think "Just give me those five years" I will post as I journey down a path no one should have to travel. Waiting to meet with oncologist soon. Just diagnosed so it is all new. Happy to be a Canuck so health care/costs is not looming on top of everything else., Nice to hear you like my name! I already feel I have some friends out there --- but so lucky to have good friends and family here as well.
Mar 17, 2019 10:30PM Wren44 wrote:
Elderberry, Your age is an asset. It seems to be worse with young women. I was 71 at diagnosis and have completed 5 years of anastrazole with very few side effects. Do you have a plan of action yet? That was the worst time for me, waiting to see how serious and what would happen to treat it. Once there's a plan it's just one step in front of the other until you're on the other side and trying to get back to normal. Are you in eastern or western Canada?
Mar 18, 2019 09:55AM IllinoisLady wrote:
Material possessions will rust away, wear away, or depreciate, but your inner resources—character—must never depreciate. In seeking success you must also seek fulfillment. Ask yourself not only what you want to be, but who you want to be. -Elizabeth Dole
Mar 18, 2019 09:57AM IllinoisLady wrote:
We are having such lovely days now. I know at some point more rain is likely to come, but it does seem that ( save for nights ) that the temps. are fairly good now and don't dip like they were, going from extreme to extreme. They now seem to inch upward more than anything. 51 degrees today and come week-end time about 10 degrees higher. I can do that easily.
I hope you are all going to have a beautiful day.
Mar 18, 2019 11:00PM Tappermom383 wrote:
Elderberry, I’ll add my welcome to everyone else’s. The wise women on this forum have been of invaluable help to me. I was a bit older than you - 70 - when diagnosed two years ago. I was already going to fitness classes and continued to go except for a couple of weeks after my lumpectomy. Those classes have made me so much stronger - my surgeon and RO were amazed at how well and quickly I healed!
Best of luck to you as you begin this adventure that no one wants to go on. Keep us posted - we’re here for you!
Mar 19, 2019 08:42AM carolehalston wrote:
Hurray for the no-rain forecast this week. Maybe our yard (and the golf courses) will dry out enough for walking on them.
Off to the gym this morning.
Such a lovely post, Tappermom.
Mar 19, 2019 09:31AM IllinoisLady wrote:
Life is made up of a series of challenges designed to bring us
to fullness of growth. Meeting them with hope in the future
is the real test of the spiritual person.
Mar 19, 2019 09:37AM IllinoisLady wrote:
Some sun this morning, but it has been muted. We may have clouds enough to keep it muted too. I just hope to have some sun even if it is not too bright. Hoping for it to stay dryer though we could get some rain tonight. Maybe this afternoon I'll do some little bit of yard work. Those leaves could use some mulching. Hopefully we won't get a rain that pours and washes out any freshly un-covered lawn.
Anyway the week-end ( 60's warm ) will be nice and offer some time I think to work out of doors. Will be doing 7 more days of my cat sitting.
Hope all of you have a wonderful day.
Mar 19, 2019 09:58AM pingpong1953 wrote:
Elderberry, as you can tell by my signature I'm a Canuck too. Where are you located?
Mar 19, 2019 11:46AM jo6359 wrote:
A rare day in Miami. Heavy Rain and cloudy all day. If the rain diminishes this evening I'm going for a run. I love running when there's a light rain. My flowers are loving this rain.
Mar 19, 2019 12:01PM jo6359 wrote:
sueter- I agree with you. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have only one physician to take care of all of her needs. I was fortunate my primary, breast surgeon, oncologist and PCP for all in the same building. Today was my last day at Mount Sinai Medical Center because my insurance refused to renew their contract with Mount Sinai. So I have to diligently find another facility. The negative is the list of providers are rated very low in terms of cancer treatment . Fortunately I'm only seeing my oncologist every 3 months . Im not allowed toself pay the doctors because I have insurance. I cannot switch my insurance until January 1st of next year. I will find a solution to this problem. When life gives you lemons it's time to make lemonade or a nice glass of wine. Have a great day
Mar 19, 2019 12:11PM Elderberry wrote:
Pingpong195 -Wren44 -- I am on West Coast in Burnaby in a wonderful neighbourhood called The Heights. A six block "High Street" area on Hastings with everything you could possibly need. This forum has been a lifeline. I hear over 60 years is the worse time -- but then again -- if I can get 5-10 years out I'll be happy. I am getting better at not feeling totally out of control. I am HER2 + so I am terrified about how fast it can grow. What I can't believe is how big it got from feeling nothing lathering up in the shower to WTF! I see great results with women with 6+cm. There is a saying in the military that there are no Atheists in foxholes. I guess the same goes for us ladies. I belong to no particular faith but I believe in spirit and I do believe all my friends,sisters pumping out their versions of prayer/chants and even spells will help. If there is an upside from all of this, I have discovered how very loved I am.
I now feel like I have new friends walking the same path. Will continue to post for your amazing support and to update on what is next. I am taking a close female friend with me to the oncologist. She can pay attention while my mind spins off into the ether. My husband would be as bad as me .
Mar 19, 2019 12:13PM HikingLady wrote:
Sueter I hear you! I have a medical oncologist, had a breast surgeon (b c specialist) for BMX, and also a plastic surgeon for my care. I'm grateful that each one is a 10 min drive from my house. I chose them for how great they are, and also for being easy to get to.
Mar 19, 2019 03:33PM nanette7fl wrote:
I just got the call from my PS office. Now I'm crying... haven't cried in month. Tuesday April 2nd is my date for my cancer surgery. Surrendering murderous left to my BS and poor healthy rightie to get matched pair. PS will insert temp expanders and close me up. He uses air and not saline in expanders and said that his ladies have less pain, pressure and issues with the air
So is it okay for me to be scared and worried now?? I feel like the reality bus just showed up and it's all becoming so very "real' right now.
So much to do now pre-OP visits, blood work and pictures at PS office to boot.
I need more tissues!
Mar 19, 2019 04:05PM MCBaker wrote:
Question: Do you really want to sacrifice healthy righty just to get a matched pair? Remember the loss of sensation. That has been tough for me.
I think air instead of saline at first is standard. It is lighter, therefore less stress on inflamed tissues.
As for tissues, be glad you can cry. I cannot cry tears. I can feel like I am crying, but without tears.
Mar 19, 2019 04:54PM IllinoisLady wrote:
Crying is a good relief valve so have a really good one. Hopefully you will feel a bit more peaceful afterward. I think crying is like a really long walk. Your spirit and nature take over after awhile and you have the emotions, feelings and best of all information you need to move through whatever dilemma/dx exerted all the pressure, confusion and angst in the first place. It puts you in a much calmer place. Thinking of you Nanette and wishing you well.
Mar 19, 2019 07:12PM jo6359 wrote:
Nanette- when the procedure is over with all you are going to feel is incredible relief. If you feel like crying Cry Girl. I have to agree with Mary I can only recall crying twice during the past 15 months. There were times I wanted to but it just didn't happen. I think crying is a healthy release. I also struggled with removing a healthy breast but I have no regrets. I chose to remove the breast. So keep us posted. If you want to vent go for it.
Mar 20, 2019 12:13AM - edited Mar 20, 2019 12:14AM by ChiSandy
I'm lucky that I have a great care team of med onc, rad onc (who "set me free" after those treatments were over) and breast cancer surgeon (just added an oncoplastic surgeon to reduce my "healthy lefty" to match the smaller but perkier-looking lumpectomied "rightie" this coming summer). It's possible these days to reconstruct after a uni mastectomy to match the healthy one as closely as possible--or alter the healthy one to look more symmetrical. I wouldn't ditch a healthy breast unless genetic testing indicates the need for a prophylactic mastectomy--you can always decide later to remove a healthy breast, but once a breast is gone, it's gone--and even the most skillfully reconstructed breast has no inner sexual sensation, no matter how it feels to the touch. (In fact, with a 2cm tumor, lumpectomy should be an option unless your breast is already rather small).
One-stop shopping is fine if you can get all your care in one location--but each aspect of your care from a doctor who specializes in that aspect. Unlike having a family physician or general internist as a primary care doc, having just one "general oncologist" to handle surgery, radiation and pharmaceutical therapy is a terrible idea, one that IMHO hearkens back to a more primitive era of less effective treatment and poorer prognoses. You know what they say about a "jack-of-all-trades..."