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Topic: Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Forum: Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer —

Meet other women who are similar in age and dealing with age-appropriate issues.

Posted on: Feb 7, 2009 03:29PM

Northstar wrote:

I am an "older" woman with breast cancer (I was diagnosed at 65 and am now 66).  I notice that most of the posts seem to be from people younger than I am (often by quite a bit...).   I'd love to "talk" with others my age, exchange info about their diagnoses, effects on their lives, etc.   I see that there is a forum for young women.

Someone suggested that maybe it's that older people aren't so computer-savvy or aren't used to being in online discussion groups.   However, for those who are, it would be great. 

DX 8/15/08, ILC, 5.1 cm, Stage IIb, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-, Oncotype DX 11.
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Oct 23, 2021 09:34AM IllinoisLady wrote:

"Peace is not something you attain.
It is a permanent state of being within you
that you choose to allow in every moment, or not."

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Oct 23, 2021 11:49AM Wren44 wrote:

Hi Puffin, His neurologist did a series of hand exercises and then said no sign of Parkinson's. He's getting stooped and that probably throws off his balance. They said to start using a cane. He'll be 82 in Nov. He refuses to do any exercise. Walking sometimes gives him leg cramps the following night so he avoids it. He seems to be going downhill physically and I feel much younger than him. Of course I can't see me walking, so what do I know.

Lumpectomy and re-excision followed by mastectomy of right breast. Five years of anastrasole completed.
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Oct 23, 2021 06:33PM 1946Taco wrote:

I don't understand why so many people are "cane adverse." We both use them, especially when walking Mutz. Just adds a little stability and reassurance. In fact, seeing our canes sitting by the door is just another sign to me of our growing old together.

Have a good weekend, everyone.

Dx 11/22/2016, IDC: Tubular, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Radiation Therapy 12/29/2016 Balloon-catheter Targeted Therapy 2/3/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 2/3/2017 Taxol (paclitaxel) Hormonal Therapy 12/3/2017 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Oct 23, 2021 10:56PM - edited Oct 23, 2021 11:22PM by ChiSandy

If I didn't have a cane, no way would I have been able to get out of bed and downstairs all this week. Yesterday was the first day I was able to keep the Rollator parked in a corner of the living room. My back is still stiff and sore, but no longer excruciating. I've kept a Leki "Wanderfreund" cane in my car for the past few years, just in case. I have a version that collapses to 24" and fits in the carry-on tote that slips over my rollaboard suitcase for when I fly. And I'm not ashamed to use it.

When Bob was having trouble with his knee, I offered him one of my canes--but he went straight for the shillelagh a friend brought back from Ireland. It's way too long for me (and of course non-adjustable as it's hand-carved from a single piece of wood) but just right for him. (My late FIL used it too, when he lived with us).

Was able to drive to Warby Parker today to get my new frames adjusted to sit level on my face; and get the new prescription put in some of my favorite existing frames. Until a couple of years ago, they would replace the lenses in any of their frames--you had to take them or send them in to the lab; but now they'll replace lenses only in frames that they still carry--in the same color. They simply have the lab make a new pair of that frame with the new prescription, and they knock off $50 and let you keep your old frames as backups. It's pricy but nowhere near as expensive as LensCrafters or Pearle. I used to like Zenni--but they will not update your lenses at all, and no optician around here is willing to touch their frames because they break so easily. So when everything comes in, I will have one pair each of progressive Transitions in purple tortoise and red ("Cardinal") crystal, one pair of sunglasses in clear ("Grapefruit Soda") crystal, and one pair of non-photochromic blue-light blocking progressives in teal ("Beach Glass") crystal, to wear late at night to cut down on eyestrain from screens. I decided not to update my readers, as the progressives have a large enough reading section. (I do love the "Viola Crystal" color of my readers' frames--which Warby no longer carries--and may take them to the indie optician in West Ridge to have my progressive prescription put in them to expand my glasses wardrobe). I have reached the age where visible eyeglass frames are more flattering than is concealer--especially when I take off my mask. At this point, there is no longer any concealer at any price that will fool anyone into thinking I don't have undereye bags or circles.

Happy is still very clingy but a bit more energetic--the prednisone is calming his gut somewhat. Jury is out on the new probiotic, though.

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/22/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/1/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/30/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Oct 24, 2021 06:06AM IllinoisLady wrote:

The mystery of language was revealed to me.
I knew then that 'w-a-t-e-r' meant the wonderful
cool something that was flowing over my hand.
That living word awakened my soul, gave it light, joy, set it free!"

— HELEN KELLER

"Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind."

— RUDYARD KIPLING

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Oct 24, 2021 06:20AM IllinoisLady wrote:

Dh and I have canes. I only seemed to have needed mine during my 'broken' arm experience. I was termed un-steady on my feet by one of the physicians on my case, but frankly, I did not believe it and neither did my PCP who has seen me many, many times. I've done my best to slow down but that incident was my usual habit of doing things way too fast for my own good. That means I'm not in good communication with my surroundings and potential hazards. I learned a BIG lesson. Here's hoping it continues to stick.

Sandy, sure glad to hear you and kitties issues are much better. Hope you continue on to a long stretch of few problems and those that may come I hope are easily solvable. Sometimes those problems show us how 'good' we are at finding workable solutions.

Rain through the night. I don't think we had anything major really --- it likely mostly was over by the time we got up around 5 a.m. this morning. Could have more through the day, but I hope not. Had a call on Friday from my favorite people on the other side of town. Dr B and his wife. She fell and has a really rough serious ankle strain -- x-rays were all good, but lots of pain, swelling and difficulty getting around. She called and I immediately cleared my schedule and went over. She just cried and cried -- she is used to helping others, not needing help for her own medical issues. I didn't really know what to say. We ( many of us ) are aging together and it is not only hard to see people you care deeply about in distress, but also see a possible picture of yourself. I finally told her -- it is temporary and I will help you all I can to get through it as quickly and successfully as is possible. She cried more but it was different -- way less intense.

Nothing much planned for today, but I will return tomorrow and any day I'm needed and work anything else in between somehow and somewhere.

Hope you all have a really good Sunday.

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Oct 24, 2021 06:37AM CindyNY wrote:

When my mom was 80 she was supposed to use a cane. I’d go to take her out some where and ask where is your cane. She’d hand it to me, ready to go. I’d laugh and tell her she is supposed to use it, I’m not supposed to carry it.

Myself with the hamstring surgery I went from walker, crutches, to cane. If I were to use one regularly I’d need a new one with a cushioned grip. The old one is wooden and my boney arthritic hand got sick of it quick.

Yesterday my niece, a gf and I went to a soap making class. A lot of fun! We each picked a different scented oil and all had different color picks. The soap has to cure so total unknown finished product. It will be interesting to see what we end up with. The owner also provided a goodie bag with 2 travel size samples of soap, a solid lotion bar, and a lip balm in ginger lim which is heavenly. Enjoy the day ladies!


dx at 58, no family history, onco = 19 Dx 10/6/2017, DCIS/IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/5 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 10/31/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Surgery 11/13/2017 Lumpectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 12/26/2017 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/1/2018 Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Oct 24, 2021 07:23AM Betrayal wrote:

CindyNY: You could use a pool noodle to fashion a hand grip for your wooden cane. Given the length of a pool noodle, you would be good for quite a while for replacement grips.

Surgery 1/31/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Surgery 1/31/2016 Lymph node removal: Sentinel Surgery 3/3/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 3/30/2016 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 6/24/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 5/18/2017 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy 6/15/2020 Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 24, 2021 07:52AM lovev7 wrote:

I was age >65 when I was diagnosed breast cancer stage-3; mastectomy done on affected breast; started Anastrozol this year; I have severe Osteoporosis; I feel over fatigue; my back is too sore that most of the time; I almost fainted.

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Oct 24, 2021 11:01AM IllinoisLady wrote:

Hi Lovev7,

You have issues, we can give you lots of suggestions. Just being tired is quite difficult I do believe. I hope you will return if you need a listening ear, willing shoulder, and lots of suggestions and some good old fashioned friendship for the journey. BC.Org has many forums as well that address specific issues. Please feel free to come anytime and vent as much as needed.

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Oct 24, 2021 01:24PM Wren44 wrote:

I think miracles occur. DH was told to quit driving and he has done so. Last night he sold his car to the friend who fixes things around the house for us. He was excited because there's plenty of room for his drums. This is a big load off me. We were all worried he would fight it to the death. DS said he could disable both cars. For some reason I didn't think that was a good idea. I wish we hadn't just gotten the new tabs. They aren't cheap even on older cars.

Welcome Lovev7, From what you wrote, I think you might consider using a walker for a while. When I hurt my hip earlier it was great. Much less likely to fall, and easier to use than a cane. I hope the fatigue is temporary. Post surgery has fatigue as does Arimdex.

Lumpectomy and re-excision followed by mastectomy of right breast. Five years of anastrasole completed.
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Oct 24, 2021 02:49PM - edited Oct 24, 2021 02:49PM by IllinoisLady

Wren, there are most definitely miracles. There is much help from the Universe which I was able to receive for more than one thing when Dh and I returned home to Illinois. We can feel so alone but never truly are and it is our blessing.

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Oct 24, 2021 07:39PM Betrayal wrote:

I don't think anyone could ever feel alone on this forum. Whenever you need a helping hand, an empathetic ear or some kindness, you can find it here.

Today was my DSIL's birthday and we had a small family party. He got to pick where he wanted takeout from so we had a great meal from a local Italian restaurant, a delicious cake from Whole Foods and a good time. He loves Halloween so I try to find items that he would like to decorate with and he has a vast collection now. Today's gifts were a Halloween Pumpkin animated pumpkin with a cat popping out of it from Hallmark, Minnie Mouse and Mickey Mouse Halloween bobble figures that use solar power, and some spending money. He's easy to please.

This week is busy. Tomorrow is covid vaccine #3 and Covid test for surgery. Tuesday is ENT, Wednesday is prep day and then surgery on Thursday. Not looking forward to this adventure and have reached the point where I wish (not really) that someone else would hear God say, here, hold my beer.

Have a good week.

Surgery 1/31/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Surgery 1/31/2016 Lymph node removal: Sentinel Surgery 3/3/2016 Lumpectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 3/30/2016 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 6/24/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 5/18/2017 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy 6/15/2020 Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 24, 2021 08:15PM 1946Taco wrote:

Lovev7 - welcome. You've been through a lot in a short amount of time. For many of us, a BC diagnosis creates PSDT (I'm conscious of it was I am ticking off 5 year marks - this month return for a second mammogram). I hope you will talk to both your MO and your Primary about your concerns. A mental health professional could be in your cards too. I don't remember the fatigue from the arimedex but I sure was moody and had a very short fuse.

And come here. We are a relatively small group and share all kinds of things but the bottom line is there is love and support here for whatever life is throwing us.

Scheduled my Moderna booster for Wed. Now if I just didn't have to see the dental hygienist tomorrow!



Dx 11/22/2016, IDC: Tubular, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Radiation Therapy 12/29/2016 Balloon-catheter Targeted Therapy 2/3/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 2/3/2017 Taxol (paclitaxel) Hormonal Therapy 12/3/2017 Femara (letrozole) Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Oct 25, 2021 05:55AM IllinoisLady wrote:

Just as gardeners cultivate their plots, keeping them free from weeds, and growing the flowers and fruits which they require, so may a person tend the garden of his or her mind, weeding out all the wrong, useless, and impure thoughts, and cultivating toward perfection the flowers and fruits of right, useful, and pure thoughts. By pursuing this process, a person sooner or later discovers that he or she is the master-gardener of his or her soul, the director of his or her life.

James Allen

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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24 hours ago IllinoisLady wrote:

Our storm finally rolled in last night. Just poured and poured with lots of thunder, lightning and tornado warnings. SIL. Dh, and I went out before the storm to get a quick bite to eat. I was just too tired to cook. I took apart one side of my bed room and washed down the walls. Took up all the cobwebs and steam mopped the floors on that side a couple of times. It was well past time.

Windy and cold today -- about 76 before the storm. I don't think it will get much past 50 or 55 today. I will be returning to Dr. B's house to help assist with the everyday chores and anything that needs attention. Good to have something to do right now as I still have car repairs in my future -- a module that attaches to my car tire is needed along with a stabilizer bar. Hoping that takes care of the lights as well as the ABS issue. I also need tires again. Last ones didn't last very long so I'm going to look for a different brand.

Glad you got your booster ( Moderna ) Taco. I am waiting for now as I just got a flu shot. Also, I haven't as yet been notified to get it. I think we will soon as November will make it 8 months since our first shots.

I hope you all have a good day.

More hugs to you Love 7 .

Each day I am thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, dreams that turned into reality and likes that turned into love. ~~~Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross Dx 9/27/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage II, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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23 hours ago CindyNY wrote:

Love7 welcome to the group. With the AI drugs some people have nothing, others have an array of side effects. The good, the bad and the ugly are discussed.

When my dad shouldn’t have been driving from macular degeneration I feared I’d be disowned when we told him he had to stop driving. Long story short he sold the car for a $1.00 to a cousin of mine who was having a hard time. She hit the jackpot and so did I.

I’m scheduled for Moderna booster on 11/1. Had to do it online for CVS and as I booked I actually thought it was for today. But as I text it to a friend I realized this Monday wasn’t 11/1. We leave 11/4 for Texas, so I’m hoping for limited side effects.

It’s been cooler and rains started late last night. And I’d guess that’s right when we realized 2 sunny days had past us and we better get ourselves in gear to get the AC unit out of the bedroom window. We had a garbage bag on the bed to lay it on and towels to dry it. The window is now closed until May 2022.

Monday Monday,enjoy the day!

dx at 58, no family history, onco = 19 Dx 10/6/2017, DCIS/IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/5 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 10/31/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Surgery 11/13/2017 Lumpectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 12/26/2017 Whole-breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/1/2018 Arimidex (anastrozole)
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16 hours ago - edited 16 hours ago by ChiSandy

Love7, welcome aboard. You might want to consider a Rollator-type 3-or-4-wheel walker with folding seat and under-cushion storage pouch. You can buy them at drugstores & warehouse clubs. The standard aluminum 4-wheelers (tiny wheels) are very barebones. Back in the day when I had to use a non-wheeled walker after broken-leg surgery (hippity-hopping with it due to my being non-weightbearing was like bench-pressing my entire body weight), there was a disability-aids chain superstore from whose catalog I was able to order a bolt-on denim sling seat, fake-shearling handle-grip covers, and even clamp-on cupholders. The superstore is gone now (not even online) but I'm sure there are similar sites.

Cindy, your nearest sporting goods store or golf-course pro shop should have foam or padded leather "grip tape" (for wrapping & cushioning golf club or tennis-racket grips). Maybe even auto-parts stores stock it for wrapping steering wheels. If you are extremely patient, you can even pad the walker grips with cotton balls wrapped in duct tape. My third vaccine shot was Moderna--but a full, not the new half-strength "booster," dose. My side effects lasted less than 24 hrs.

Miserably raw, windy and wet yesterday afternoon into this morning--we're at a 2-day high right now of 52F. Despite getting almost 4" of rain, our basement didn't flood, and despite the 50mph wind gusts we didn't lose any of the green tomatoes still on the vine. All the herbs are still standing too. At least no frost here by the lake--though there have been 16-foot waves crashing over the seawalls, swamping the hiking/biking paths and even occasionally spilling over on to the shoulder of the NB lanes of Lake Shore Drive. I don't envy those living in the beachside condos with underground parking garages, nor the unlucky souls living along the beach whose backyards are getting ever smaller as the waters encroach. One neighborhood to the north, a light pole fell on a parked car, and a tree in Grant Park was uprooted.

Bob brought home dinner from Boston Market on the SW Side, but the drive through the storms was so long (traffic worse than usual) that it had to be nuked before we could enjoy it. More and more, he is my mealtime hunter-gatherer, though I am still the freezer-forager and grocery-gatherer. Been at least 6 mos. now that I haven't had to rely on Instacart or WF/Amazon Fresh for deliveries--dreading the upcoming winter days when snow will make that necessary again. I have finally conquered my early-pandemic-era compulsion to have a "spare" dozen eggs, milk bottle or loaf of low-carb bread in case we run out and I can't get more. I am slowly working my way through our freezers before buying any more fish or meat. (Two weeks now without ordering from Hooked on Fish; and I am choosing as long an interval as possible between Butcher Box shipments--might even suspend my subscription).

My back is stiffish and sore-ish but I can move without stooping or leaning, and I didn't need my painkillers (8-hr Tylenol + Aleve) this morning--just using heat and topicals. I may actually take a full shower tonight--haven't been able to safely step over the tub rim into the shower, so I've been sponge-bathing and using dry shampoo. Was considering getting my roots done tomorrow, but I don't think I can handle leaning back in the salon's shampoo chair yet. Dark roots are fashionable--but gray roots not so much.

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/22/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/1/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/30/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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14 hours ago Wren44 wrote:

Very wet and windy here yesterday and today. Lots of people lost power and a couple was killed when a tree fell on their car. The road they were on is heavily forested and I would not have been driving there. Someone I know lost power and internet. Went to her ex husband's living room to get her work done. We live in a Scandinavian part of town and don't have big fir trees. Story is the Norwegians cut them down to build houses.

Lumpectomy and re-excision followed by mastectomy of right breast. Five years of anastrasole completed.

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