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Topic: Ladies in their 40s

Forum: "Middle Age" 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer — Meet others in this age-range who share similar life issues.

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Posted on: Jan 13, 2014 03:11PM

Posted on: Jan 13, 2014 03:11PM

youngturknyc wrote:

Hello All,

I just wanted to start a new thread for ladies in their 40s.  Although we are considered "middle aged," many of us are still dealing with issues concerning young women, such as fertility, pre-menopausal status and related treatment decisions, young children at home, being single etc.  Both younger ladies (in their 20s and 30s) and older ladies (60s and above) have been so gracious to include us on their threads, but I thought we could have our own place to meet.  Also, obviously, this is not a thread to exclude anyone due to age. If you share similar concerns or issues (or if you are "near" your 40s), please post.

I will start by introducing myself - I was diagnosed at the age of 40 in October 2012.  I have two young children at home (9 year-old twins), and I still work, and I am very far away from retirement.  I did make the decision to have my ovaries removed due to the fact that I could not take tamoxifen due to a blood clotting issue, and therefore, I was sent to instant menopause.  I look forward to meeting you ladies.

Dx 10/14/2012, DCIS, 6cm+, Stage 0, Grade 2, 0/6 nodes Dx 10/14/2012, ILC, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 0/6 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 10/14/2012, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 0/6 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 10/25/2012 Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right); Prophylactic mastectomy; Prophylactic mastectomy (Left) Surgery 10/25/2012 Reconstruction (Left): Tissue Expander; Reconstruction (Right): Tissue Expander Chemotherapy 12/10/2012 AC + T (Taxol) Surgery 5/29/2013 Reconstruction (Left); Reconstruction (Right) Surgery 7/9/2013 Hormonal Therapy 7/16/2013 Femara (letrozole)
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Sep 2, 2020 09:18PM dread2020 wrote:

You seem like an incredibly strong and humble person to me. I thought doing this with young kids was too much, but adding a recent separation and the absence of a supporting spouse...wow. And yet, in the short time since we both joined this board, I've seen you express gratitude more than once. I'm just in awe of that!

I decided to do a lumpectomy, so that I could be informed by the histology and prevent progression while I mull over my subsequent treatment steps. I have resigned myself to doing chemo (even though the thought of hair loss, and corollary loss of privacy, is destroying my mind), and after that I'll follow up with radiation and/or more surgery.

Unfortunately, the scheduling of the lumpectomy, as with every other referral and procedure so far, has been subject to mishaps and delays. I was originally having it this week, then was told Tuesday next week, and now even that is up in the air. The uncertainty is eating through my coping like acid. No results from genetics yet.

Fingers crossed for your biopsy results!

Went from stage I to II or III when 2/2 nodes, cleared during surgery, came back positive from pathology, which also revealed LVI, extranodal extension, and 2 (<1mm) satellite lesions in the tumor resection margin. Dx 8/13/2020, DCIS, Left, 2cm, Stage 0, Grade 2, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 8/13/2020, IDC, Left, 1cm, Grade 2, 2/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy Aromasin (exemestane), Zoladex (goserelin) Radiation Therapy Whole breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol) Surgery Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left)
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Sep 3, 2020 05:01PM wc3 wrote:

Ladyc2020:

I'm sorry your husband has not been supportive. I've dealt with narcissists before. They come in different flavors but I lost my taste for all of them during cancer treatment. Toxic people and situations are just not worth my time.

Have you looked in to resources through your cancer center? They may have local support groups and possibly even transportation services.


Pathologic complete response (pCR) to chemotherapy. Dx 2018, IDC, Left, 3cm, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 6/1/2018 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 11/15/2018 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Left); Mastectomy (Right); Reconstruction (Left): Tissue Expander; Reconstruction (Right): Tissue Expander Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Targeted Therapy Perjeta (pertuzumab) Targeted Therapy Herceptin (trastuzumab) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery Reconstruction (Left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (Right): Silicone implant
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Sep 4, 2020 12:18AM ladyc2020 wrote:

dread - you are very kind :) I have found focusing on the many positives around me reducing my stress and anxiety significantly. And I definitely want to do that. I feel like Facing This uncertainty has made so much of life seem unimportant, and I am more aware how good my friends are and how loved I am, in a way perhaps I couldn’t see as well before. And of course, that my cancer seems to be very treatable is something I am massively grateful for. I am so sorry you have so many delay’s! Did you get a confirmed date today?? I have now decided to do surgery locally instead of travel and hope to get a date for next week. Like you, it’s a lumpectomy. I’m just waiting on the schedule of everything, Covid ect. I think I will get more anxious leading up to the surgery honestly! Need to start that guided imagery a friend sent me.


WC3 - yeah, nothing like a cancer dx to just make you want to be totally real all the time with everyone, and want the same back 🙏🏼 I did connect with a few people - I have a cancer connections phone buddy and there is a monthly Zoom support group. I have now decided to stay local for surgery and transport will be easy to figure out. Appreciate your advice, thank you


Hormonal Therapy 2/28/2020 Femara (letrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Dx 8/6/2020, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 8/21/2020 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery 9/18/2020 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left) Dx 9/23/2020, DCIS, Left, 2cm, Stage 0, Grade 1 Radiation Therapy 10/31/2020 Whole breast: Breast, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Sep 9, 2020 04:38PM - edited Sep 9, 2020 04:39PM by duchessoftea

Hello July152020,

I don't know if I decided to go flat as the decision was made for me but I have not had reconstruction since my bilateral mastectomy. I had just turned 43 and had gone through chemo but I was still really ill. I gained a lot of weight during chemo and the plastic surgeon didn't think I was a good candidate. I had planned on getting it done later but 7 months after the mastectomy, I was diagnosed with a new tumor in my adrenal gland. So I began chemo again....It has been two years and I am again thinking about it. It is a difficult decision. I have gotten used to the way I am and rarely wear the prosthetics. I know how difficult the surgery is and everyone I have spoken to has told me it was so much harder recovering from reconstruction that the initial surgery to remove the breasts....so I just don't know, I think it would have been easier if I could have done it at the beginning but I have seen a lot of women get infections and have more problems that way, so I really don't know. Everything about breast cancer is hard. The treatments, the surgeries, the decisions....I hope you are able to come to a decision that you are comfortable with and are emotionally ready for....Praying for you

Dx 10/13/2016, IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIB, metastasized to other, Grade 3, 1/14 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 2/20/2017 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Left); Mastectomy (Right) Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol)

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