Jan 2, 2017 12:33PM - edited Jan 14, 2017 11:41PM by IHGJAnn49
Posted on: Jan 1, 2017 09:57PM - edited Sep 7, 2017 01:31PM by Moderators
One of the things that makes our community so special is are the many, many friendships that have formed on these boards; friendships that have gone from anonymous online support, to real-life bonds.
If you've met and developed a close bond with someone during your time here, one that has translated from the forums to real-life, we'd love to hear from you!
As always, thank you, for being here, for sharing yourselves with us, and for sharing your lives with each other.Log in to post a reply
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Posts 1 - 30 (30 total)
Jan 2, 2017 12:33PM - edited Jan 14, 2017 11:41PM by IHGJAnn49
Jan 2, 2017 08:25PM Metta wrote:
Thanks to this wonderful forum, I met a group of 30 women who were diagnosed in autumn 2014 and started chemo in November 2014. We supported and encouraged each other, compared notes, answered each other's questions, and dusted each other off after it was all over. I feel I know these women even though we are from all over the world. Two of us have stage four cancer. One, the woman who brought us closer via a private Facebook group, died.
A few of us meet every few months. It's so thrilling to meet in person. We are real people! And we are still there for each other
Jan 8, 2017 06:26PM BMD wrote:
March 10, 2007 was when we first met in person after connecting as the San Diego group on this website. Although we have lost some friends over the years we also continue to welcome newcomers. We still meet once a month for lunch. We call ourselves the San Diego Lunch Bunch. Most of us don't post much on BCO anymore. Facebook kind of took over that roll over the years. 3 of our Lunch Bunch are from the original group that met that 1st day. We are a great group and love and support each other. Some months there are just 2 or 3 at lunch and other months 8 or more. Today we had an off schedule lunch because of the holidays and we had 6 lovely women show up. We meet at the same place every month now and try to do it on the third Sunday of the month. Unfortunately over the years several of our friends have lost their battle. We remember them with love. We have had BCO members from far and wide join us when they are in town. Some from in the state, some from for out-of-state and even a few from as far away as Australia have joined us for lunch.
Out of the blue last night I received a pm from a local woman asking about my doctors so I just happened to see your request for Friendship stories pretty much by accident. Today everyone at lunch asked me to connect with you. How coincidental that March 10, 2017 will be the 10 year anniversary of the San Diego Lunch Bunch.
Jan 9, 2017 05:32PM ArmyChick31 wrote:
I found this site while researching more on breast cancer and other cancers I have increased risk for. I was diagnosed as BRCA2 expressive this year. Genetic testing was recommended after the death of my oldest sister (one week after I retired from the Army after 31 years of service). She had ovarian cancer and was BRCA2. My mother died in 2000 from pancreatic cancer. They had both been through uterine cancer, but survived. My father had prostate cancer, though he died from a heart attack. My second surviving sister has colon cancer and is Tay-Sachs gene expressive, and my older surviving brother has leukemia. Genetic testing was recommended due to the family medical history.
I am having surgery on 3 March this year for a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. This was decided after a lump was found in my breast last year. An aspirate and, later, lumpectomy, showed it was benign. But due to the BRCA2 mutation expressed in my genes, total hysterectomy and bilateral mastectomy were recommended. I agreed. A salpingo-oophorectomy, and removal with my cervix and uterus was done in October, 2016.
I found this site and became a member last week. I have read testimonies here and feel I have finally found a resource with others who not only will listen to my struggles but can definitely relate to them. This was not my idea of retiring from the Army. It is amazing how so many things has changed in my life after learning of my Ashkenazim Jewish descent (my other surviving sister was found to express the Tay-Sachs gene--I am negative for this...she is negative for the BRCA2). It's been a year of revelation, truthfully.
I am glad I found this site. I find it supportive and encouraging, though I have made no direct relations with anyone as of yet. I am looking forward to my relationship online with you all!
Jan 9, 2017 06:40PM - edited Jan 9, 2017 06:41PM by Brenda77
I'm new and don't have any friends yet. I've been in this all alone the whole past 5 years. It seems impossible to ever stop worrying about recurrence.
Jan 9, 2017 07:01PM ksusan wrote:
The March and April 2015 Chemo groups have some overlapping members and interact a lot on Facebook. Some of us have met for different activities, including a camping trip in Glacier National Park. I love those women!
Jan 10, 2017 03:48PM robinblessed54 wrote:
I have formed a wonderful friendship with Kingster. Even though we live almost 3,000 miles apart, we have become very close. We had our exchange surgery 1 day apart. We have so much in common. We tried to plan to get together last summer but it didn't happen.
We send pictures and keep each other up to date on treatment and the other things that happen with BC. It has been an almost 2 year friendship. Thank you for this wonderful board.
Jan 10, 2017 05:53PM dlb823 wrote:
I will have to go back through my photos, but I have enjoyed meeting in person quite a few women from BCO, some of whom I had already formed very special bonds with on these pages. Here's one of the more recent ones. I also have BCO friends I frequently text and/or message that I haven't yet met, but who are very special to me.
Jan 17, 2017 05:15PM - edited Jan 18, 2017 08:38AM by claireinaz
Late last year the bc.org "Claires" met each other. Claire in Seattle happened to be traveling through my city, and we had breakfast together one morening at the local B&B where she stayed.
Claire was particularly inspirational to me because she exercised (rigorous) throughout all her treatment. My worst fear pre-treatment was that I would NOT be able to keep up with my exercise and yoga schedule, which keeps me sane and fit, and after reading and talking with her a lot on this site before I started chemo, I realized I indeed could keep doing what I was doing, although I may be more tired before and perhaps after. I so needed to keep up something normal in my life to make me feel like I was still alive, still going to be okay. I modeled my behavior after Claire, and it worked.
I only modified my yoga schedule--did not go to bikram yoga 3-5 times a week. I scaled it back to 2, and hiked after chemo tx whenever possible and when weather permitted. Still kept up with weightlifting and walking the dog, etc.
She and I had a nice breakfast together and it was wonderful to spend some time with someone who helped me through those dark days.
I'm friends with several BC.org women on my Facebook page, too.
All ya'll are invaluable to me, still! Hugs/love
Claire in AZ
Jan 20, 2017 03:41PM maryannecb wrote:
I am a 10 year survivor. My chemo group formed in October 2005. Eventually we called ourselves the Rocktobergirls and kept our thread running for many years. From various parts of the world we met in Chicago, Las Vegas, Alaska, Toronto and Nova Scotia. We still share our triumphs and sorrows..although we have moved to FB as it was easier.
Jan 27, 2017 03:01PM LRGO2016 wrote:
I too have formed strong bonds with BC Warrior women through this forum. One in particular is like a true sister to me even though we've never met. Before posting more, I want to be sure she agrees to share our story of the growth of our friendship. So stay tuned! I truly have come to love this courageous woman and her remarkable family. Though we've not yet been able to physically meet, I count her among my dearest friends.
She is a rare and remarkable person!
Jan 27, 2017 08:03PM Kz1966 wrote:
These boards have been so comforting. A place where you feel understood. I've learned so much. You do bond with so many.
I have been become very close and consider her family, like a sister to me. We haven't met. We live very far from each but hopefully one day we'll meet.
It's unfortunate that we had to meet on here but I am blessed to have her. We support each other. It's nice to not just talk about cancer. We have learned about each other. We tell each other life stories. We text or email everyday, a few times a day.
It's great to read such great stories!
Love ya Kelly! Hopefully you'll read this ☺️
Jan 29, 2017 11:40AM ajbclan wrote:
I did just now Kathie! Thanks!! Amazing what we've gone through, and will continue to support each other through and then finally celebrate together one day!!!!
Jan 30, 2017 09:03AM Sue2009 wrote:
This is kind of hard to write. A little over a year ago I PM a woman who was from the same town I was getting treatments for my BC. We messaged each other a couple of times, then started texting. We met last summer finally & we really enjoyed our visit. We were able to talk about our experiences regarding our BC, we both were close in age & had children going to the same college. We encouraged each other when our husbands didn't seem to get what we were going through emotionally. Late this past November my friend got a Pet scan that showed increased mets. My new friend said she was ready for hospice care, her pain level was too much for her. She called me & asked me to come by her home. Unfortunately my son had totaled my car driving back to school after Thanksgiving. I thought I had time to get over to see her. I texted her a couple of times. My final text from her said her heart was gone. I have 6 children who all came for Christmas, so I was distracted. I text my friend earlier this month when I got back in town & got no response. I looked on line for her obituary. There it was, she had passed on Dec 24th. My heart has been so heavy, but I am glad we became friends & that would never happened if we had not been on BCO.
Jan 30, 2017 09:15AM nbnotes wrote:
I was invited 4 + years ago to a lunch that was several people from bco in tampa. I joined the thread before the actual lunch and felt immediately welcomed. That lunch was the 2nd or 3rd for the group, I think, and we have continued to meet every few months. The people in this group have become true friends being there for each other through surgeries, changes in treatments, and helping each other with finding/getting jobs, etc. I count them all as a blessing to me as they have gotten me through many things. Some people have come and gone from the group due to moving to Alaska or other things, but it is one of the most welcoming group of people I've ever met. Anyone in the area is welcome when we get together! So so thankful for the friendships made through the tampa bco group!
Jan 30, 2017 02:36PM ckk wrote:
Seventeen of us met here on BCO after joining the December, 2011 chemo discussion group. We became very close during treatment, and shared stories and strategies to get through bad times. As we entered survivorship, we realized that our discussions were becoming much more personal, so we moved over to a private group on Facebook. Of the seventeen, one left the group, and one dear friend passed after going stage 4 about a year after dx.
The group has become a lifeline for all of us. We check in daily, and fill each other in on life events, medical challenges, and day to day concerns. We have shared things with each other that we have not with anyone else. We've met in person in Pennsylvania, Atlanta, and just this past November in DC for a 5 year celebration! We range in age from early 40s to mid sixties. The bonds are stronger than friends - we ARE FAMILY. I am forever grateful to BCO for connecting me to my dear, cherished December BC sisters ❤
Feb 4, 2017 01:30PM Rexy wrote:
10 years ago I had DCIS stage 0 , lumpectomy and radiation, tamoxifen for 5 years, 10 years later same breast I have cancer again. before my double mastectomy and reconstruction the surgical pathology
report said invasive ductal carcinoma 4.5mm nuclear grade 2 no angiol ymphatic invasion detected,
pathologiac tumor stage pT1a, pNX
the anterior margin just about the previous biopsy cavity is markedly disrpted partially precluding the
definitive assessment of that margin.
This is before mastectomy. my estrogen receptor Clone SP1 NEGATIVE, Progesterone receptor CLone IE2 NEGATIVE, HER2 (cLONE 4B5 POSITIVE (+3)
After surgery, my dr said she sent to pathology , not once but twice results of tumor , CLEAN
I DID NOT need CHEMOTHERPY,
i WENT to oncologist , he feels without twisting my arm , he said , i should have chemo and receptive
for 1 year, 12 weeks chemo 12 weeks receptor then the remaining chemo. 1% chance that because
my HER2 was positive , microscopic cell COULD HAVE traveled , which means there is no test to see
and 5 years or more I could possibly get cancer somewhere else. I am in a delemia, I really dont want
to go through the HELL of chemo when I was so excitied, i cryed because my breast surgeon told me
i did not need treatment, Now WHAT DO I DO??????? I AM SCARED!!!!
Feb 4, 2017 03:27PM SpecialK wrote:
nbnotes - everything you said about our Tampa BCO group is so true! We are interwoven into each others lives in different ways, but we all share the bond of this sisterhood. I so look forward to our lunches because it is so easy to be with people who already understand. I wish none of us had to meet because breast cancer entered out lives, but I am so glad to know these awesome ladies!
Feb 5, 2017 10:07AM claireinaz wrote:
Hi Rexy, you might want to re-post your response on the "Just diagnosed" thread....this one is created just for stories about how we've formed friendships through this website. I'm mentioning it because I think you'll get a lot more activity and replies if you post it in a place where more people who might be able to help or are interested to help will be able to do so..I'm so sorry you're experiencing all of what you described and I hope by re-posting in the "just diagnosed" topic you'll get a lot of advice.
Feb 13, 2017 04:03PM gently wrote:
ArmyChick I am having surgery March 10. I hope to see you in the March surgery group and in other topics. I've only been on this site in the past few days and am heartened by the quality of caring and intelligence creating this foundation of support. I have a feeling we'll have plenty to say in this Friendships topic, over time.
Oct 17, 2018 09:43AM nowheregirl wrote:
OMG I didn't know about this topic.
I joined this community right after my dx so it's been 13 years now. I've made friends with quite a few lovely ladies over the years and Donna aka djd has become a special friend to me. Even though we literally live thousands miles away from each other - she in Dallas and me in Japan -, we've met in person 3 times (twice here and once in TX). We are looking forward to the 4th reunion.
Oct 17, 2018 01:58PM ruthbru wrote:
Some of ladies from the Lets Post Our Daily Exercise thread just got back from our 8th annual road trip. This year we were Nashville Cats!
Dec 10, 2018 12:26PM Joanne58 wrote:
I've truly enjoyed reading these posts and seeing the pictures of the wonderful women who are friends, forever, because of this site. Thank you, Mods, for starting this thread I just discovered! BCO is a lifeline in so many ways, but providing forums that build friendships--a sisterhood--is the crowning achievement, in my opinion
Jul 25, 2019 07:04PM ASCF wrote:
I am so thrilled I found this site! I work with the Anne Stirba Cancer Foundation in Utah.. and for the past 7 years we have held a party called "Nite off from Cancer". It is a celebration of hope, stories, memories, love, caring and kindness! Anne Stirba was a wonderful, intelligent, beautiful woman who was also a Judge in the State of Utah. She left behind two girls and her husband when she passed away almost 15 years ago. Since we are blessed to be near the Huntsman Cancer Treatment Center here in Utah ..we have formed a good partnership with them.. We are a small Foundation, but we have still been able to help with things some patients have needed for care etc.
I am just looking to say Hi and let people know our little Foundation is here. We want to make friends and connect to be a part of this amazing community of people!
My best to all!
Sep 18, 2019 07:13AM - edited Sep 18, 2019 07:14AM by Animalcrackershusband
Can someone please help me? My name is Chris. My wife, Cathy, lost her battle with breast cancer in June. I'm pretty sure she was a regular visitor to this online community...going by the name of Animal Crackers, I believe.
I know how important the online community was to her. I think she would want me to check in and let her online friends know of her passing. I'm assuming any friends out there have assumed the worst, as she hasn't been online for at least a few months if not longer. Still, I'd like to try to let any of her online friends know what happened and how much she loved you all.
Not really versed in navigation tactics for this site or certain what topical forums she might have frequented. If one of you ladies reading this can find your way to assisting me with notifying her friends I, and I'm sure she, up there in heaven, would be most grateful.
Sep 18, 2019 08:52AM - edited Sep 18, 2019 09:01AM by Moderators
Animalcrackershusband, We are terribly sorry for what you are here, and wanted to extend our sincerest condolences for the passing of your dear wife Cathy. Our thoughts are with you and your family.
It is very sad, but at the same time is nice of you to come here to let all her friends know about her. If you want to know the threads where she used to post, you can use the Search function (left blue menu) and make a "Search by Member Name". This will give you a list whit all her posts and the threads where she had posted, so you can go there and write your own post to let members know. She was a loved and valuable member of our Community, so we're sure her friends will welcome you with open arms.
Hope this helps! And please, let us know if we can be of any further assistance.
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