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Topic: Daughter and caregiver

Forum: Caring for Someone with Breast cancer —

A place to share your struggles and concerns about supporting and caring for a person you love diagnosed with breast cancer with others who understand.

Posted on: Jun 7, 2018 08:58PM

sherbear817 wrote:

My mother found out back in March of this year she had stage 2 breast cancer.  She had a biopsy and surgery to remove the tumor ( a lumpectomy) in April. Since then it's been a never ending stream of doctor's and tests. Mom doesn't drive so I am the one taking her back and forth for all of this. She Has decided she will receive both chemo and radiation, as discussed with her doctor's, but it feels like a it's taking forever to get to that point.  As the old saying goes hurry up and wait, beyond frustration on my end and I'm sure mom feels the same way. 

          The latest in this long string of never ending list of procedures was a recommendation from her chemo doctor to have a second surgery  to remove more of her lymph nodes, a surgery mom has decided to forgo after talking to the surgeon and discussing the risks. 1 being scar tissue build up and operating on the same site twice and also the high probability of her developing  lymphoedema.

        I'm sure someone out there somewhere has also dealt with this frustration and it's not just me. Thankfully I have a supportive husband at home, with 3 children of our own to take care of he has had to pick up a lot of the slack while I am with my mom, but it would be nice to be able to talk to others who have maybe experienced the same or similar circumstances. 

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Jun 8, 2018 12:12AM Moderators wrote:

Hi Sherbear-

Welcome to BCO! This is an incredibly supportive community, and you've come to the right place. Breast cancer affects the entire family, and caregivers such as yourself often carry so much of the weight. We're so glad you've been there for your mom, and we're glad you've come to our community for support as you both get through this.

The Mods

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Jun 12, 2018 09:32PM sherbear817 wrote:


Mom is going in tomorrow to have her port put in and will start chemo treatments next week. Positive vibes and prayers are always welcome. Thank you.

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Jun 13, 2018 09:22AM edwards750 wrote:

Bless your heart so sorry for your Mom and you. My sister and I both have BC. Our Mom had it too many years ago. She had a MX but back then there weren’t that many options. I’m almost 7 years out. My sister is a year behind me. Neither of us had chemo but we did have radiation.

I know you are on overload with the steady stream of tests and doctors appointments. It’s truky exhausting. Thank goodness you have a supportive husband. I’m sure it’s hard on him and your children.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel although it doesn’t seem like it right now. Do you or your mother have anyone else who can help? Don’t hesitate to seek out support from friends or other family members. We have a support group at our church.

You and your mom will get through this. We are all testaments to that.

Keep the faith and keep us posted.


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Jun 15, 2018 08:55PM sherbear817 wrote:

SO all my life I always remember my mother having long hair. Down to her waist long. Today was an extremely emotional day for both of us, as I took mom to the hair dresser to get her hair cut. She then donated it all to locks of love. Her chemo doctor told us there is a very big possibility that she will lose her her during her chemo treatments. So instead of losing it all, and having it go to waste she decided to do something proactive instead. I am so proud of this wonderful and brave woman, and so happy that I get to call her mom.

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