A place to share your struggles and concerns about supporting and caring for a person you love diagnosed with breast cancer with others who understand.
Posted on:
Nov 16, 2018 12:00PM
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Nov 16, 2018
Gorex
wrote:
I hope this is the correct section of the forum. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer a month ago. She doesn't dedicate me to the details of her treatment, says that her insurance covers everything. But it bothers me how she feels, how to help her? We have cold relations all my life, but I'm really worried about her health. I understand that without that, in order to improve our relationship, I willn't be able to talk to her. But I'm afraid that I will saythat somethingis wrong and she will completely stop talking to me.
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Nov 16, 2018 03:19PM
Moderators
wrote:
Gorex, sorry to hear that you and your mom are in this situation. Maybe you could offer to accompany her to an exam or treatment? Or ask if she needs help in her home to prep things before/after surgery? Letting her know that you are there for her, anytime she needs, is a very good message to provide. Please keep us posted on how she responds, and what you decide to do.
Warmly,
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Runrcrb
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Nov 16, 2018 03:53PM
Runrcrb
wrote:
Gorex, sorry to hear of your mother’s diagnosis as well as the “cold” relationship you have.
How you can help your mother depends a lot on your mom. Is she naturally introverted and close to the vest with information or does she tell everyone everything? I am introverted. While many people knew of my diagnosis and treatment very few were actively involved. I took a friend to doctor appointments during the diagnosis phase who took notes- maybe that is an offer you can make. I went alone to chemo and radiation appointments intentionally.
Dinner delivery was helpful. Get well and thinking of you cards too.
This could be an opportunity to change your relationship if you and your mom want that. But I don’t advocate for pushing it. Are you in the same town? If so you can drop by for short visits. I hate talking on the phone so phone calls were a burden to me and I rarely answered.
Dx
6/27/2016, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 4/10 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
Dx
6/27/2016, ILC/IDC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 4/10 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
Surgery
9/22/2016 Lymph node removal: Right; Mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement
Chemotherapy
10/31/2016 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel)
Radiation Therapy
2/9/2017 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall
Hormonal Therapy
4/23/2017 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
Surgery
12/13/2017 Reconstruction (right): DIEP flap