Topic: My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

Forum: Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer, Open to All To Contribute — Topics here are started by members with a Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer diagnosis, but open to all members to contribute to discussions. Please note that there is a separate forum, Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer ONLY, where topics are open only to those members.

Posted on: Jul 6, 2017 08:38PM - edited Oct 28, 2019 12:42PM by micmel

Posted on: Jul 6, 2017 08:38PM - edited Oct 28, 2019 12:42PM by micmel

micmel wrote:

As I go through this forced path I have been thrown down, I have come to realize the love I have always had for my husband was strong. He is amazing and I love him with my very soul and entire heart. Never would I ever imagine the thought of dying and him being alone. Then the worst part hit me!! I can't seem to shake the horrible sorrow of thinking of another woman taking my place in his life and his heart, and if I Am honest his bed. He is my best friend and the love of my life, I would never need another for any reason. He makes my life complete, and then this happens. How do I process that I most likely won't be the one growing old on the porch that we have talked about, how do I process, someone else sitting in that chair? I hate this trajectory path I've been spun onto, and everyday I feel grief and deep sorrow. How do I live everyday knowing in the back of my mind, I feel like a place holder, for another woman who will be stepping into my life when I die of this horrible disease, more sooner than later. Why would I even want to take any medicines or treatments, when the answer is pretty obviously in front of my face.? Why do we fight so hard for something we cannot control ? Why do we hurt so badly thinking about letting go, or giving up? It's a four letter word that holds so much power. That word is LOVE..... If you have ever felt this way. Share with me, because I understand, I feel this way everyday. I also don't know what to do with the sadness of loss or how to process the process of dying. However slow or fast it may be. Please share your love stories with me, how did you meet? How long together? I want to know your stories, everyone has their person. Everyone loves.....tell me about your family, your friends, your life too, as if this was your living room. ♥️

We are team FU cancer (Named by Parry, our sweet sister) and this is our Lol pub and living room. Welcome, put your feet up and just be you!

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Left) Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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May 21, 2022 11:56AM sunshine99 wrote:

SF-Cakes, so glad you got good results.

Waving "hello" to everyone!

Carol

my-sunny-side-up.com Cancer has progressed to my bones. I pray that it never enters my soul. Dx 11/2/2007, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIA, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 3/26/2020, IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, ER+/PR-, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 4/22/2020 Arimidex (anastrozole) Radiation Therapy 5/5/2020 External Local Metastases 5/5/2020 Radiation therapy: Bone Radiation Therapy 5/12/2020 External Local Metastases 5/12/2020 Radiation therapy: Bone Targeted Therapy 6/10/2020 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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May 21, 2022 12:14PM mara51506 wrote:

Well my goodness, the hot weather is being replaced by cooler weather but we have a loud and lightning filled storm going on. One thunder boom scared the hell out of me and sent the cats running. One under my bed, other under the couch. It is not supposed to last long thankfully.

I did boil some dry black beans and chickpeas. I did not presoak so boiled first for a few minutes, turned heat to medium and left for 40 mins and then one last boil. When they came out, much softer though not as soft as canned beans. I did strain them, popped on a plate with a silicone cover and microwaved for 75 seconds. They did taste good, just did basic seasonings, italian and steak, wheat bran sprinkle, salt. Put 1 tablespoon of queso, 1 teaspoon of garlic spread, 1 teaspoon of mayo as well. Tasted really good and is easier than soaking for 24 hours I think.

I am also so happy that we can finally have walmart grocery delivery here. Though the checkout uses instacart, I am paying a flat fee and comparing the price to the regular instacart, I still save a few dollars. Wanted some unscented cat litter. There is no closet to put the litter box in and they don't like covered, so it is in the corner of the living room. Always change it but the litter itself as a weird odour to it so deciding to add in some unscented to tone down.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right) Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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May 21, 2022 12:59PM livingivlife wrote:

SF cakes- yahoo! Wonderful news! Now enjoy your weekend 😊

Deb
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May 21, 2022 01:41PM booboo1 wrote:

SF-Cakes, I hope you are feeling the love. Heart That’s what this living room does for each other, right? When it’s good news, we celebrate together….with big hugs and high fives! Bad or crappy news? We surround each other with support. I’m so glad I landed here when I was first diagnosed.

Candy, so sorry about the injections not giving you the relief you need. I guess it’s time for me to find an orthopedic and have them tell me what to do with this hip. It seems like a lot of us have hip problems. Hmmm…another side effect from these drugs?

BevJen, maybe you and I could start our modeling careers since we’ve both lost so much weight! Yeah, right. I am so disgusted with the flabby skin I have since losing, but it’s not like there’s anything I can do about it

Kiko, I didn’t know there was a drug out there to stimulate your appetite. Good to know. I go through periods of eating fine, and then having to push really hard to get myself to eat. Thank you, Mr. Chemo.

Rosie, I am hoping you can switch from Zometa to Xgeva too. I have been taking Xgeva for years and never had a side effect from it.

Livingivlife, rest up, my dear. Don’t you just hate traveling? It used to be so different. Now planes are delayed so often that you almost expect it. But getting home at that hour is brutal. Hard on your body. Take it easy the next couple of days.

Well, it’s a hot one here. May break a record. I’m staying indoors in the air conditioning and having a nice long nap.

Take care all.


Laurie (aka Booboo) Dx 3/1/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 5/15/2013 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lymph node removal Dx 1/2017, DCIS, Left, 1cm, Stage 0, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Faslodex (fulvestrant) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy Ibrance (palbociclib) Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol) Radiation Therapy 3DCRT: Breast
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May 21, 2022 01:43PM mara51506 wrote:

Well, stupid me, decided to treat myself to a Dairy Queen blizzard, mint oreo flavour. It was expensive by the time you factor in delivery fees tip etc. I thought, it is OK, just a treat. Well, by the time I got it, it was melted. I drankit. Taste was fine but that is terrible. Restaurants need to keep it cooler after made and drivers should have a cooler to keep this cold or warm as needed. I will never again use this service, too costly and though it was a nice taste, NOT what I paid for.


2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right) Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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May 21, 2022 01:56PM sunshine99 wrote:

Oh, boo, mara! How disappointing to be expecting a DQ Blizzard, and then getting a melted mess. Can you get a refund? They should factor the "melt factor" into their delivery system. We drive by a DQ on our trips out to the desert. DH likes to stop for a cone sometimes. I've only had the Blizzard once. It was tasty. I think I'd like the mint Oreo. Sometimes, I don't want that much, but I think they have a kiddie size version. I may have to try that on our next trip.

Carol

my-sunny-side-up.com Cancer has progressed to my bones. I pray that it never enters my soul. Dx 11/2/2007, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIA, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 3/26/2020, IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, ER+/PR-, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 4/22/2020 Arimidex (anastrozole) Radiation Therapy 5/5/2020 External Local Metastases 5/5/2020 Radiation therapy: Bone Radiation Therapy 5/12/2020 External Local Metastases 5/12/2020 Radiation therapy: Bone Targeted Therapy 6/10/2020 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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May 21, 2022 01:57PM sondraf wrote:

Things are really ramping up here for the Jubilee - I was in the city today to buy a halfway decent beach swimsuit and wandered past where the Irish Guards were marching down the Mall practicing for Trooping. So a ton of horses, Lifeguards (the ones with the metal breastplates and ponyhair in their helmets), a military marching band and a unit all marching with rifles and bearskin hats. Just like a postcard!

Of course, like everyone else we are leaving for the actual weekend. Its been impossible to find a cat sitter from the 28th as everyone is either fully booked or gone or super flaky, so yesterday we drafted in my mother who is arriving Monday morning from Milwaukee. Thank god JetBlue had some really good last minute fares and my 73yr old mother is small/fit enough to fold up comfortably in an econ seat. The dumb things we do for our pets, but it came out to about the same price as a live-in sitter (though we normally just get a one day a visit), Mom is thrilled, and it will give us some time together too when we get back.

"The closer we come to the negative, to death, the more we blossom" - Montgomery Clift Dx 9/27/2019, IDC, Right, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/29/2019 Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy 11/29/2019 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery 11/28/2021 Lymph node removal (Right): Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy (Right) Targeted Therapy 3/1/2022 translation missing: en.treatments.targeted_therapy.targeted_therapy_medicine.short_options.lynparza
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May 21, 2022 04:16PM illimae wrote:

Sondra, you can fly me to England to cat sit anytime 😁

Candy, in your pocket for Monday.

Sscakes and Mara, congrats on good MRI’s

So, I woke up yesterday with terrible pain as the removal of spinal fluid can cause a wicked imbalance resulting in an excruciating headache. Had to spend most of the day in the ER. I felt like every bone from ribs to skull were being crushed and extreme pain causes me to throw up, which hurts my abs and ribs, so pain on pain. The solution is IV fluids and caffeine but I kept puking, it’s been a vicious circle. Finally got the right nausea and pain meds and am just catching up on 4 pages!


Diagnosed at 41 Stage IV De Novo Dx 11/16/2016, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+ Chemotherapy 1/2/2017 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 1/2/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 1/2/2017 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Surgery 6/26/2017 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lymph node removal Radiation Therapy 8/10/2017 Breast, Lymph nodes Dx 10/5/2017, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+, HER2+ Radiation Therapy 10/20/2017 External Local Metastases 10/20/2017 Brain Radiation Therapy 4/18/2018 External Local Metastases 4/18/2018 Brain Radiation Therapy 5/23/2019 External Local Metastases 5/23/2019 Brain Surgery 1/22/2020 Radiation Therapy 2/17/2020 External Local Metastases 2/17/2020 Brain Radiation Therapy 7/20/2020 External Local Metastases 7/20/2020 Radiation therapy: Bone Radiation Therapy 12/4/2020 External Local Metastases 12/4/2020 Brain Targeted Therapy Tukysa (tucatinib) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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May 21, 2022 04:31PM mara51506 wrote:

Oh Mae, that sounds truly awful to be in such pain and being sick from it. I am so glad you got the right meds to treat it. Glad it seems you are feeling better.

Sunshine, yes I was disappointed but I did drink it. I did submit a complaint, we will see if the delivery place will give a refund. On the plus side, it did taste good and reminded why food delivery is always a bad idea for me, cold food or melted stuff.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal; Mastectomy; Mastectomy (Right) Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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May 21, 2022 04:52PM denny10 wrote:

sf cakes doing the happy dance for you \o/

sondra: a holiday and you get to see your mum, a double win.

Illimae hope you are feeling well enough to enjoy some food you fancy .

mara it's horrid when you are looking forward to a treat and it goes 'wrong'. you shoud get some recompense- you did not the goods you ordered.

If you are staying in because it's too hot , cold or wet have your best weekend.


12/2021 Stage IV TN Dx 2007, Left, Stage IIB, HER2- Dx 12/2013, Right, Stage IV, metastasized to liver/lungs/other, ER+ Hormonal Therapy Faslodex (fulvestrant), Femara (letrozole), Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)

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