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May 14, 2021 05:43AM
May 14, 2021 07:12AM
Mel, I have to echo what these smart ladies are suggesting about depression and evening things out emotionally. I don't care for the idea of drugs but if you cannot pull out of a persistent gray spell where it feels like nothing is good in the world, a drug could be the answer and does not have to heavy duty to be effective. It does not change what happens but may help to redirect thoughts in another way.
I can relate to persistent depression if I don't sleep enough or walk at the start of the day. The days I exercise upon waking, my mindset is better but the days I do nothing at all or start to obsessively worry about something, my mind goes immediately to I don't want to be here, why choose treatment when I am alone. These are bad thoughts which I have to avoid.
In short, I would really like you to get help to deal with the pain in your life. If it cannot happen through exercise, drugs may not be a bad idea. I don't like anyone feeling close to how my feelings get sometimes.
Edited to add, I like Rosie's suggestion about looking into a rescue possibly to give some of the obvious love that you have to share with people and pets. That kind of thing can help mend a broken heart while still giving tribute to Tag and Deeoghee as well.
2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta.
3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
4/22/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right
5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+