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Topic: My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

Forum: Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer, Open to All To Contribute —

Topics here are started by members with a Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer diagnosis, but open to all members to contribute to discussions. Please note that there is a separate forum, Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer ONLY, where topics are open only to those members.

Posted on: Jul 7, 2017 01:38AM - edited Oct 28, 2019 04:42PM by Micmel

Micmel wrote:

As I go through this forced path I have been thrown down, I have come to realize the love I have always had for my husband was strong. He is amazing and I love him with my very soul and entire heart. Never would I ever imagine the thought of dying and him being alone. Then the worst part hit me!! I can't seem to shake the horrible sorrow of thinking of another woman taking my place in his life and his heart, and if I Am honest his bed. He is my best friend and the love of my life, I would never need another for any reason. He makes my life complete, and then this happens. How do I process that I most likely won't be the one growing old on the porch that we have talked about, how do I process, someone else sitting in that chair? I hate this trajectory path I've been spun onto, and everyday I feel grief and deep sorrow. How do I live everyday knowing in the back of my mind, I feel like a place holder, for another woman who will be stepping into my life when I die of this horrible disease, more sooner than later. Why would I even want to take any medicines or treatments, when the answer is pretty obviously in front of my face.? Why do we fight so hard for something we cannot control ? Why do we hurt so badly thinking about letting go, or giving up? It's a four letter word that holds so much power. That word is LOVE..... If you have ever felt this way. Share with me, because I understand, I feel this way everyday. I also don't know what to do with the sadness of loss or how to process the process of dying. However slow or fast it may be. Please share your love stories with me, how did you meet? How long together? I want to know your stories, everyone has their person. Everyone loves.....tell me about your family, your friends, your life too, as if this was your living room. ♥️

We are team FU cancer (Named by Parry, our sweet sister) and this is our Lol pub and living room. Welcome, put your feet up and just be you!

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Sep 23, 2021 07:30PM candy-678 wrote:

Dutchiris- Good that you can stay on the same treatment for now. But don't we hate to have to rescan sooner--more scanxiety. Ugh.

I broke down and took a Zofran today. I am tired of the nausea. But, the Zofran made me groggy. Don't like that feeling either. Sigh...

Found mets on CT for unrelated issue. I only had 2 treatments with IV chemo for the Stage II, then found Stage 4 and switched to hormone therapy/targeted therapy. I consider myself de novo. Xgeva use for bone mets. Liver bx Apr 2021 shows ER- now. Dx 6/2017, ILC/IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/11/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/31/2017 AC Dx 9/2017, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/1/2017 Femara (letrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Targeted Therapy 11/1/2017 Ibrance (palbociclib) Dx 4/2021, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, ER-/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Targeted Therapy 9/3/2021 Lynparza Hormonal Therapy 9/4/2021 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Sep 23, 2021 08:00PM SeeQ wrote:

Goldens - maybe your photographer friend could recreate some of your wedding pics for an anniversary.

Diagnosed de novo Stage IV; numerous liver mets; single small breast tumor identified 4 weeks later Dx 6/2/2020, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to liver, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Hormonal Therapy 7/3/2020 Arimidex (anastrozole) Targeted Therapy 7/10/2020 Verzenio
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Sep 23, 2021 08:20PM Sunshine99 wrote:

dutchiris, I'm sorry about the progression. I'm glad your MO is keeping on top of it by moving your next scans up.

Cancer has progressed to my bones. I pray that it never enters my soul. Dx 11/2/2007, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIA, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 3/26/2020, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, ER+/PR-, HER2- (FISH) Hormonal Therapy 4/22/2020 Arimidex (anastrozole) Radiation Therapy 5/5/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 5/12/2020 External: Bone Targeted Therapy 6/10/2020 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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Sep 23, 2021 10:02PM Trishyla wrote:

I actually have issues with falling down, too. (And yes, I am a recovering Virgo) Hence the broken ankle last year while simply walking around the neighborhood in the dark. But I never say I'm a klutz when I fall. I just say I hit a random pocket of differential gravity. Sounds so much more interesting.


Dx 8/30/2016, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 8/30/2016, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2- Dx 9/6/2016, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 9/28/2016 AC + T (Taxol) Surgery 4/4/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): DIEP flap; Reconstruction (right): DIEP flap Chemotherapy 8/5/2017 Xeloda (capecitabine)
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Sep 23, 2021 10:16PM illimae wrote:

Dutchiris, sounds like mostly stable, yay :) Do they recommend rads for the active bone met or continued treatment and watching it?

Diagnosed at 41 Stage IV De Novo Dx 11/16/2016, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+ (IHC) Chemotherapy 1/1/2017 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Surgery 6/26/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 8/10/2017 Breast, Lymph nodes Dx 10/5/2017, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+, HER2+ (IHC) Radiation Therapy 10/19/2017 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 4/18/2018 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 5/22/2019 External: Brain Surgery 1/21/2020 Radiation Therapy 2/16/2020 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 7/20/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 12/4/2020 External: Brain Targeted Therapy Tukysa (tucatinib) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Sep 23, 2021 10:55PM mara51506 wrote:

While I am glad you do not have to have a new treatment for now, I am sorry there is progression in the T11 section. Glad they are taking such good care of you.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 23, 2021 10:58PM mara51506 wrote:

Well, I think I know how my electric dryer died. I decided to pull it out and take it apart to look at. I was horrified to see that my ducting had come apart and the lint filter in the machine was full of cat fur, not lint but cat fur because the end of the hose had come off. I believe this most likely led to the damage of the fuse, I cleaned it out and behind the dryer. Still using it on no heat to fluff the clothes but lets me know that when the time comes to replace it, to keep an eye on that area. Glad it still works to fluff what I put on my heated rack.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 24, 2021 01:24AM Iwrite wrote:

Yikes Mara! Glad you found the issue. I think you’ve just convinced me to not get the cat I wanted..

Between every two pines is a doorway to a new world. John Muir Dx 11/2/2015, ILC, Both breasts, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/5/2015 Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy 11/11/2015 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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Sep 24, 2021 10:54AM mara51506 wrote:

Ha ha, skip the cat or spend more time brushing them and sweeping the floor for sure and checking the hose behind the dryer.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 24, 2021 04:06PM GoKale4320 wrote:

I didn’t know cat hair would get in the dryer since the cats don’t wear any clothes! Speaking of cats, I had an early appointment at the cancer center so there weren’t many cars in the parking lot. I noticed a cat sitting under a tree and then several more (maybe 8 total). I parked and walked over to take a picture, but a man was there feeding them. He had supplies in his suv. Then I noticed he was wearing scrubs so he must work there. After my appointment, I tried again to get a photo, but the cats ran away when I was still 30 feet away.


Dx: January 2017, IDC, Stage IIa, 1/23 nodes, <1cm Chemo 2/16/17 Cytoxan Taxotere x4 Radiation 6/8/2017, natural alternative to tamoxifen 3/2021 Stage 4 - mets to bones. Ibrance and Letrozole and Xgeva Dx 1/2017, IDC, Right, <1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/23 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Sep 24, 2021 06:07PM mara51506 wrote:

GoKale,my only guess is I did not remove it well enough from the lint filter and the exhaust hose fell off the back of the dryer exposing it to possiblecat fur. Scary though.


2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 24, 2021 08:42PM illimae wrote:

Well, I am having a lovely day watching British detective mystery shows and making chicken soup. The quiet of a TV at reasonable volume is a relief I didn’t know I needed until now. DH and his friend are set up in their camp site, which is far more isolated that I thought, so I’m feeling good about the very low exposure risk.

The media relations company handling the webmd feature (coming soon) have reached out about an article in the local newspaper (pinktober is coming, lol), so I’m doing that as well. Not much other that scans and getting out of the house.

Happy weekend my friends 🙂

Diagnosed at 41 Stage IV De Novo Dx 11/16/2016, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+ (IHC) Chemotherapy 1/1/2017 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Surgery 6/26/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 8/10/2017 Breast, Lymph nodes Dx 10/5/2017, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+, HER2+ (IHC) Radiation Therapy 10/19/2017 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 4/18/2018 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 5/22/2019 External: Brain Surgery 1/21/2020 Radiation Therapy 2/16/2020 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 7/20/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 12/4/2020 External: Brain Targeted Therapy Tukysa (tucatinib) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Sep 24, 2021 10:19PM booboo1 wrote:

Hi Mae,

Maybe I missed it, but what is happening with WebMD?


Laurie (aka Booboo) #metastaticbreastcancer Dx 3/1/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 5/14/2013 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 1/2017, DCIS, Left, 1cm, Stage 0, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Faslodex (fulvestrant) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy Ibrance (palbociclib) Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol) Radiation Therapy 3DCRT: Breast
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Sep 24, 2021 10:40PM illimae wrote:

booboo, a drug company is wanting highlight Tukysa (for HER2+), which came out last summer and patients currently using it, partially as advertising, I think and also to help other countries get it approved. The and a media company interviewed and a doing a patient profile on WebMD. I think we’re finalizing it next week and I should run on the website for a couple of months. I will post a link when it’s out 🙂

Also, I’m not being paid for this and I prefer it that way, I’m not selling anything, it feels more honest this way. And I want people to see that BC happens to anyone whether your 26, 34, 41 or 62.

Diagnosed at 41 Stage IV De Novo Dx 11/16/2016, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+ (IHC) Chemotherapy 1/1/2017 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Surgery 6/26/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 8/10/2017 Breast, Lymph nodes Dx 10/5/2017, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+, HER2+ (IHC) Radiation Therapy 10/19/2017 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 4/18/2018 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 5/22/2019 External: Brain Surgery 1/21/2020 Radiation Therapy 2/16/2020 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 7/20/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 12/4/2020 External: Brain Targeted Therapy Tukysa (tucatinib) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Sep 24, 2021 10:48PM Micmel wrote:

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Sep 25, 2021 02:46AM Micmel wrote:

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Sep 25, 2021 01:25PM - edited Sep 25, 2021 09:14PM by booboo1

Mae,

That is SO cool. I can't wait to see it. You are a STAR! No, just kidding. I think it's so awesome that you are sharing your experience. To me, that is the highest form of support for others who get this disease. To be able to hear someone other than a drug company rep talk about it is how these drugs get noticed and hopefully approved in other countries. Well done, my friend.


Laurie (aka Booboo) #metastaticbreastcancer Dx 3/1/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 5/14/2013 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 1/2017, DCIS, Left, 1cm, Stage 0, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Faslodex (fulvestrant) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy Ibrance (palbociclib) Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol) Radiation Therapy 3DCRT: Breast
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Sep 25, 2021 02:39PM SondraF wrote:

Mae - well done for doing something that makes Pinktober more positive from the MBC perspective! Let us all know when its been posted.

Last few days here in the US and I feel like all we do is drive up and down the interstate and buy stuff. The spare bedroom is piled with stuff to be shipped back to the UK. But we've had a great time and done a lot of fun things although I can only imagine what my blood numbers are going to be in a few weeks. I guess I have three weeks to eat a LOT of salad.

Mel - Love your list - SNL did a parody of that Mare of Easttown show and they all talked like that :)

"The closer we come to the negative, to death, the more we blossom" - Montgomery Clift Dx 9/27/2019, IDC, Right, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/29/2019 Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy 11/29/2019 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Prophylactic ovary removal
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Sep 25, 2021 04:05PM Sunshine99 wrote:

mel, I love that shirt! Made my day.

SillyHeart

Cancer has progressed to my bones. I pray that it never enters my soul. Dx 11/2/2007, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIA, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 3/26/2020, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, ER+/PR-, HER2- (FISH) Hormonal Therapy 4/22/2020 Arimidex (anastrozole) Radiation Therapy 5/5/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 5/12/2020 External: Bone Targeted Therapy 6/10/2020 Ibrance (palbociclib)
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Sep 25, 2021 06:30PM mara51506 wrote:

I love the shirt as well, really cool Mel.

Mae looking forward to seeing you.

I look like a drowned rat. It was sunny when I set out on my 12km/7.61 miles, totalling 18522 steps. Got a few things in Walmart and set off home, luckily it was still dry when I sat on a bus stop bench to eat a granola bar and drink bottle of water for the way home. My knapsack added some weight. Then of course it started raining, a light rain but enough to soak me through as I neglected to bring an umbrella. I enjoyed the walk, only super tired when I got close to home. I would normally have rested at a burger joint but no liking their meals so much lately. I do like the temperature now and even though I am soaked, it is not a bunch of sweat which is still nice. Will get something to eat and strip out of the wet clothes and swap for dry ones. Sitting on my butt the rest of the day.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 26, 2021 03:37AM Micmel wrote:

Well the movers are all done. Consolidated into one home. I am such a. Creature off habit. I like the curtains closed. He likes them open for the light. I like to watch television because it’s all I can really do. He always has to be moving. Just seeing we are both set in our ways. I’m worried thought that now the move is complete. He will switch his focus back onto my son and having him move out. I realize I don’t like that topic very much. I hope it doesn’t turn ugly again. It seemed things were slowly ironing out. Truth is , we haven’t seen much effort or movement in anything from his actions. I believe he would stay forever If given the chance. I am stuck my friends. Stuck real good again in life throwing in battling cancer. I really can’t take the stress. I constantly live with a feeling of fear of turmoil. I’ve had enough of that. I need peace. I honestly do. Thee hardest thing. Even over finding out about my cancer. Because it’s my children. Mama comes to protection party. It’s a mamas nature. I love my DH but he is so hard to deal with sometimes. Hardheaded (as I) but it’s really difficult when someone always thinks that their points are more valid than yours. It’s defeating. We’re having Allstate problems. Man they suck people were having issues because the car is so new. Still waiting on that. Always something to add spice to crap. Another thing that sucks is puketober is coming. Gag

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Sep 26, 2021 04:02AM mara51506 wrote:

Mel, all I can try to advise besides just listening to you is deal with one thing at a time. Worry is such a soul destroyer and you won't be able to change any situation that may arise by letting it creep in. If conflict arises between your husband and son or you and your husband, you both will deal with each other as well as the living situation at home. In your pocket anytime, know that I will be supporting you across the miles. Life really is tough and sucks sometimes. Puketober does not help and I will ignore it.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 26, 2021 11:38AM booboo1 wrote:

Mel,

I’m here in your pocket too. Mara and I both understand your anxiety about this living situation (Mara, you are such a good friend). It’s like when your DH retires and you are now face to face everyday. Now what? But you have a third one thrown in (your DS), and that makes it even more complicated.

As Mara said, one thing at a time. Good advice. That’s all any of us can do. I do think one thing you could do is write down and present to both your DH and DS some ground rules. Ask them to read it and agree. Seriously. Put it on the refrigerator. Put things like you all must respect each other, etc. I’d even number it so you can refer back to it. What do you think about that idea?

Just know that you are loved and supported here….always.


Laurie (aka Booboo) #metastaticbreastcancer Dx 3/1/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 5/14/2013 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Dx 1/2017, DCIS, Left, 1cm, Stage 0, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 2, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Faslodex (fulvestrant) Hormonal Therapy Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy Ibrance (palbociclib) Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol) Radiation Therapy 3DCRT: Breast
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Sep 26, 2021 01:19PM mara51506 wrote:

Laurie, I love the idea of writing down some ground rules for DH and son or even as a whole family. If they are followed, you can do things to reward yourselves like a night out at a nice restaurant paid by DS and other weeks DH or if not wanting to go out, ordering in and watching a movie as a family. I think if it was made clear, no further discussion would be needed. DS may have some house rules set to keep things agreeable as well. Certain chores like garbage, laundry or other things. If he is not great at cleaning his room, keeping his door shut could help avoid having to say much. Just to lift some of the stress you carry off your shoulders. As adults they both need to respect each other and you by getting along better with each other.

I hope today finds you feeling better Mel.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 26, 2021 01:48PM candy-678 wrote:

Mel- You have been given good advise by Booboo and Mara. I don't know what to say as I do not have a husband or son. I live alone. For now. Let me explain, with my sisters passing and when my Dad passes, my brother will be living alone. We have not talked about it, but me alone and he alone, maybe combine and live together. ?? Help each other. But, I have lived alone for years. Do I want a roommate? Maybe you and DH and DS can just have a meeting together. "Now that we combined houses we need to talk". Get it all out in the open and make some ground rules. Say that you need some peace with your MBC and you cannot have the stress and turmoil. Do you think that might work? Open the communication lines.

Found mets on CT for unrelated issue. I only had 2 treatments with IV chemo for the Stage II, then found Stage 4 and switched to hormone therapy/targeted therapy. I consider myself de novo. Xgeva use for bone mets. Liver bx Apr 2021 shows ER- now. Dx 6/2017, ILC/IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/11/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/31/2017 AC Dx 9/2017, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/1/2017 Femara (letrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Targeted Therapy 11/1/2017 Ibrance (palbociclib) Dx 4/2021, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, ER-/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Targeted Therapy 9/3/2021 Lynparza Hormonal Therapy 9/4/2021 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Sep 26, 2021 01:59PM candy-678 wrote:

Well I have felt pretty crummy with this Lynparza- nausea and fatigue. Not much on agenda for today. Online church service, as I am still not getting out to in person church due to Covid in our area. Maybe a load of laundry. Reading. This week I have an eye appointment-- yearly check up. And I have a thyroid biopsy on Thursday. I have had thyroid nodules for years. Last biopsy in 2016 was benign. Current PET showed uptake SUV of 7.8 to thyroid so they want me to have a biopsy. I hope this week I get more used to the Lynparza and the side effects slow down. Pocket duty to any who need it this week.

Found mets on CT for unrelated issue. I only had 2 treatments with IV chemo for the Stage II, then found Stage 4 and switched to hormone therapy/targeted therapy. I consider myself de novo. Xgeva use for bone mets. Liver bx Apr 2021 shows ER- now. Dx 6/2017, ILC/IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/11/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/31/2017 AC Dx 9/2017, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 11/1/2017 Femara (letrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Targeted Therapy 11/1/2017 Ibrance (palbociclib) Dx 4/2021, ILC/IDC, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, ER-/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Targeted Therapy 9/3/2021 Lynparza Hormonal Therapy 9/4/2021 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Sep 26, 2021 06:52PM mara51506 wrote:

This is for anyone having a crappy time with cancer, stress, life in general or all the poor people at businesses enforcing masking or vaccine passports.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 26, 2021 07:31PM illimae wrote:

Mara, can you imagine those arches to the eyes, yikes!

The news reporter thing is done. We talked for about an hour 1/2 with a break for a photo shoot in my front yard. She’s in her mid thirties I think and we had a bit in common, nice girl and she is specifically focusing on those being diagnosed at a younger age. I was planning to push that angle but no need now. She said it would be out in about two weeks, of course I’ll share it with you all.

It’s tv mysteries now and relaxing before a busy next few days. I hope everyone is having a good weekend :)

Diagnosed at 41 Stage IV De Novo Dx 11/16/2016, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+ (IHC) Chemotherapy 1/1/2017 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 1/1/2017 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Surgery 6/26/2017 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 8/10/2017 Breast, Lymph nodes Dx 10/5/2017, IDC, Left, 5cm, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, 3/13 nodes, ER+, HER2+ (IHC) Radiation Therapy 10/19/2017 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 4/18/2018 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 5/22/2019 External: Brain Surgery 1/21/2020 Radiation Therapy 2/16/2020 External: Brain Radiation Therapy 7/20/2020 External: Bone Radiation Therapy 12/4/2020 External: Brain Targeted Therapy Tukysa (tucatinib) Chemotherapy Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Sep 26, 2021 08:06PM mara51506 wrote:

I would imagine those arches causing quite a bit of facial damage. It just came up in my facebook and I thought that would apply to a lot of situations.

Candy my friend, still in your pocket sending you healing thoughts and my energy as well.

Not doing too much now. Already walked my 10000 steps since my grocery store did not have my chocolate milk. I was honestly surprised I chose to walk to the other store which was an extra 15 mins or so after over an hour getting to the first store. I am finding adding the pb and me peanut butter powder to my bean meals really makes a difference in my energy level as yesterday I walked 18000 steps yesterday from my house to Walmart. I only stopped to sit on a bench on the way home for a granola bar and water and really did not tire out until I was nearly home. Being wet sucked as it started raining yesterday but my boot and shoe dryer worked quickly to dry them out.

2015 chemos AC plus T Herceptin august 12 2016 craniotomy for brain met Sept 23 whole brain radiation November 2016 Herceptin, Perjeta and Taxol. Dec 2016, Dropped the Taxol due to extreme side effects, continuing Herceptin and Perjeta. Dx 3/15/2015, DCIS, Right, Stage 0, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 4/21/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Right Dx 5/15/2015, IBC, Right, Stage IIIB, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Dx 7/29/2016, IBC, Right, 6cm+, Stage IV, metastasized to brain, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2+
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Sep 27, 2021 01:46AM - edited Sep 27, 2021 01:47AM by Micmel

Hello ladies ~ getting ready for bed and wanted to thank everyone for their advice about my conundrum here at home. Ds has to step it up. There is no way around it. DH isn't a janitor he's a good soul who really tried to do good for everyone and I feel this allowed behavior is disrespectful, I don't know how to enforce or change the behavior into productive moving forward action. It's just so annoying he's old enough he should be getting it but then again like everyone says. Why would. He ?? He has it made paying little rent, on my insurance policy for his car. Who would want to give up that Cush deal? No idiot

Lol at Mara getting scrappy !!!! Loving it

Everyone has to dance, they just don’t know what song they will get. Dx 1/22/2016, IDC, Left, 4cm, Stage IV, metastasized to bone, Grade 2, 13/35 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 2/10/2016 AC Surgery 6/21/2016 Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 7/20/2016 Abraxane (albumin-bound or nab-paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 11/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Surgery Chemotherapy Chemotherapy Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)

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