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Topic: A Question About Scarves to Wear Post-Chemo

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Posted on: Jan 15, 2020 03:40PM - edited Jan 15, 2020 05:47PM by JKL2017

JKL2017 wrote:

I want to send a gift to someone who, following a recurrence, recently completed chemo. I saw her earlier this week (when she told me of her recurrence, treatment and current NED status) and she is now wearing scarves as her hair grows back. Since I didn't have chemo, I have no experience with this subject and am hoping that some of you can tell me what size and fabric you preferred for the scarves you wore. I don't know the recipient well enough to ask her friends or family for advice but she was so kind and helpful when I was diagnosed that I want to do something special for her. Thanks in advance.


Dx 2/2/2017, ILC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 3/7/2017 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Radiation Therapy 3/19/2017 Multi-catheter: Breast Hormonal Therapy 5/23/2017 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Jan 15, 2020 04:15PM MountainMia wrote:

I ordered scarves from a well-known site and didn't end up wearing any of them. I hated them all. I also received several as gifts and they were mostly awful, too. While these comments are probably not helpful (!!) my suggestion is to either ask her directly -- "you've been so kind and helpful to me, and I'd like to do something for you. I noticed you're wearing scarves now and wondered if you have a favorite size or style..." OR allow her the pleasure of picking something out for herself with a gift card.

Good luck. This is very thoughtful of you.

The rain comes and the rain goes, but the mountain remains. I am the mountain.
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Jan 15, 2020 05:15PM MinusTwo wrote:

I couldn't stand scarves either, but I loved 'Buffs'. I had cotton for summer and wool for winter. You can tie a knot in the back or not, and I'm still using mine 5 years after my hair grew back. I found several of mine at REI or Academy.

https://buffusa.com/shop-buff/sale.html

But I do like the idea of a gift card so she can pick what she wants.

2/15/11 BMX-DCIS 2SNB clear-TEs; 9/15/11-410gummies; 3/20/13 recurrance-5.5cm,mets to lymphs, Stage IIIB IDC ER/PRneg,HER2+; TCH/Perjeta/Neulasta x6; ALND 9/24/13 1/18 nodes 4.5cm; AC chemo 10/30/13 x3; herceptin again; Rads Feb2014
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Jan 15, 2020 05:35PM LoriCA wrote:

Personal taste but I agree with MountainMia, the scarves that are marketed as chemo headwear are hideous and scream "I have cancer!". I was gifted several and wouldn't wear any of them. She makes a good point about asking your friend what she prefers because it depends on her taste and style. My personal preference - around the house (or hiking and camping) I wore comfortable beanies, some lightweight cotton and some heavier knitted ones when it was cold. But for going out in public I wanted lots of pretty scarves that coordinated with whatever I was wearing so I frequented places like Target to buy every pretty chiffon and silky-type oblong scarf I could find (at around $15 each I could justify buying as many as I wanted). An oblong let me tie it any way I wanted, but I usually prefer to leave the tail long. After I tied it once I could leave it tied and just slip it onto my head the next time I wore it, only needing to tighten it up once in a while after several wearings. I always received compliments on my scarves.

IBC Stage IV de novo - mets throughout skeleton (bones & now bone marrow), liver, dozens of distant nodes, chest wall/pec muscle, skin, tumor in brachial nerves, thyroid, polycythemia from bone marrow involvement Dx 9/8/2017, IBC, Right, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver/other, Grade 3, ER+/PR-, HER2+ (IHC) Chemotherapy 9/26/2017 Taxol (paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 2/6/2018 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Targeted Therapy 2/6/2018 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 11/26/2018 Taxol (paclitaxel) Radiation Therapy 1/30/2019 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Targeted Therapy Enhertu (fam-trastuzumab deruxtecan-nxki) Targeted Therapy Kadcyla (T-DM1, ado-trastuzumab)
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Jan 15, 2020 08:45PM - edited Jan 15, 2020 08:45PM by JKL2017

Thanks, ladies, for the thoughtful answers. I agree that traditional chemo scarves are not always attractive! (I was thinking about getting a scarf that she could use in other ways if it wasn't something she wanted to wear on her head.) I'm sure if I were to ask her preference she would be very gracious but ask me not to get her anything but I really liked the way you framed the question, Mia. I'm not always comfortable giving gift cards, unless it's to kids or people I know are on strict budgets. It just feels like I'm not willing to put the time in to find the perfect gift (I know that's silly but I guess we all have our idiosyncrasies!). The gift is for someone who can afford pretty much anything she wants; I am just trying to tell her I'm keeping her in my thoughts. Oh, well, I'm retired so I have a tendency to spend too much time thinking about things like this! Now to obsess about what to say in the note to go with the gift ... LOL

Dx 2/2/2017, ILC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 3/7/2017 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Radiation Therapy 3/19/2017 Multi-catheter: Breast Hormonal Therapy 5/23/2017 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Jan 15, 2020 11:08PM nopink2019 wrote:

Lots of chemo scarves are ugly, but one thing they are is large. Takes alot to cover top and back of head. That's why the oblong scarf mentioned worked well. If you get a square, make sure it is big, not bulky. Extra length lets it trail or wrap over the head for a top knot. If you are still confused, watch a couple of videos and you'll get a better idea. Such a thoughtful idea!

Dx 2008, IDC, Stage IA, Grade 3, ER+/PR-, HER2- Dx 2019, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver/lungs, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 8/23/2019 Taxotere (docetaxel) Chemotherapy 9/20/2019 Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy 11/12/2019 Faslodex (fulvestrant) Targeted Therapy 11/12/2019 Kisqali Hormonal Therapy 5/9/2021 Aromasin (exemestane) Targeted Therapy 5/9/2021 Afinitor (everolimus)
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Jan 16, 2020 05:56PM JKL2017 wrote:

Thanks, nopink, that is exactly the kind of information I was looking for. I like your suggestion about watching some videos; I am going to do that now! This site and the generous people who populate it - are such a great source of information ... on so many subjects.

Dx 2/2/2017, ILC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 3/7/2017 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Radiation Therapy 3/19/2017 Multi-catheter: Breast Hormonal Therapy 5/23/2017 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Jan 16, 2020 07:25PM Annie60 wrote:

I hated the chemo scarves and hats. I found a youtube site that showed how to use a t-shirt for a head wrap. You cut the t-shirt under the arms. Just search youtube for it. I bought t-shirts for under $3 and a These wraps stay secure, are super easy,

Dx 8/28/2018, IDC, Right, 1cm, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Dx 8/28/2018, DCIS/IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (DUAL) Radiation Therapy 5/29/2019 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 8/21/2019 Surgery Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol)
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Jan 16, 2020 07:32PM Annie60 wrote:

Sorry - I submitted too soon - I bought bandanas for a $1 to wrap the scarf. Anything with "chemo" attached is very expensive. These were so cheap and you can find colors to match any outfit.

Dx 8/28/2018, IDC, Right, 1cm, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Dx 8/28/2018, DCIS/IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (DUAL) Radiation Therapy 5/29/2019 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 8/21/2019 Surgery Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Chemotherapy AC + T (Taxol)
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Jan 16, 2020 09:15PM Legomaster225 wrote:

I have a box full of beanies and scarfs of all colors and fabrics. I ordered from small websites and from amazon. These were my favorite, not fancy but they were very comfortable

https://www.amazon.com/Headcovers-Unlimited-Scarf-Cancer-Charcoal/dp/B01BWP7G62/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=chemo+headwear+for+women&qid=1579226628&sprefix=chemo&sr=8-3

I never looked near as perky or full of color as the model though.

Diagnosed at 50. Currently 54. Oncotype score 39. One node positive at diagnosis negative after preadjuvent chemo. Bilateral cancer discovered at BMX. Left breast was supposed to be prophylactic. :-( Dx 12/3/2016, IDC, Right, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 1/19/2017 AC + T (Taxol) Dx 6/22/2017, DCIS, Left, <1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1 Dx 6/22/2017, IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/0 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 6/22/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant Radiation Therapy 8/22/2017 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 10/17/2017 Hormonal Therapy 9/9/2018 Aromasin (exemestane)
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Jan 16, 2020 10:59PM Homemadesalsa wrote:

My favorite hats ended up being cycling beanies. I had one with Harley Davidson logo on it, fun to wear, but the ones for road bikers are good too, very colorful.

Dx 12/26/2017, IDC, Left, 6cm+, Stage IIIC, Grade 3, 9/9 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (IHC) Surgery 12/26/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left Surgery 1/2/2018 Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Chemotherapy 1/25/2018 AC Chemotherapy 3/29/2018 Taxol (paclitaxel) Targeted Therapy 3/29/2018 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Targeted Therapy 3/29/2018 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Targeted Therapy 5/9/2019 Nerlynx Radiation Therapy Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Jan 17, 2020 01:43AM ShetlandPony wrote:

JKL, I think your plan to make a scarf for a gift is lovely. I think handmade gifts are very special. Headcovers Unlimited web site (headcovers dot com) has lots of ideas and tells the dimensions of the scarves.

2011 Stage I ITCs sn, premenopausal, Oncotype 16. 2014 Stage IV mets breast,liver. TaxolNEAD. Ibrance+letrozole 2yrs. Fas+afinitor nope. XelodaNEAD 2yrs. Eribulin,Doxil nope. SUMMIT FaslodexHerceptinNeratinib for Her2mut NEAD Dx 2011, ILC, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 2014, ILC, 2cm, Stage IV, metastasized to liver/other, Grade 2, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy Whole-breast: Breast Surgery Lumpectomy
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Jan 17, 2020 01:54AM WC3 wrote:

I was never completely bald but enough so to need headwear. I never wore a scarf. Just my sun hat or fleece beanie. I thought about a Russian ushanka but it looked ridiculous on me.

Pathologic complete response (pCR) to chemotherapy. Dx 2018, IDC, Left, 3cm, Grade 3, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Chemotherapy 5/31/2018 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 11/14/2018 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy Arimidex (anastrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Targeted Therapy Perjeta (pertuzumab) Targeted Therapy Herceptin (trastuzumab) Hormonal Therapy Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant
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Jan 20, 2020 08:30PM Moonflwr912 wrote:

i wore a lot of scarves! Some regular ones, some chemo ones. My favorites were the pre-tied ones, like Legomaster showed. Some of the people at the treatment center called me the scarf lady because I had so many. Gave away all the pre-tied ones, kept the regular ones to wear as scarves. BTW, my head was cold, so scarves helped, especally at night, when I wore knit fabric ones.

Sometimes life SUCKS! Sometimes it doesn't. I prefer when it doesn't! If you're ever bored, read my biography. Bring snacks..... LOL Monica Dx 11/11/2011, DCIS, Right, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ (FISH) Dx 12/8/2011, IDC, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Surgery 12/8/2011 Mastectomy: Right; Prophylactic mastectomy: Left; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Surgery 1/17/2012 Reconstruction (left) Targeted Therapy 2/16/2012 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 2/16/2012 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 8/13/2012 Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy 8/20/2012 Arimidex (anastrozole) Surgery 9/10/2012 Reconstruction (left) Surgery 8/14/2013 Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement Surgery 9/4/2013 Reconstruction (left) Surgery 12/13/2013 Reconstruction (left): Saline implant; Reconstruction (right): Saline implant
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Jan 20, 2020 08:43PM - edited Jan 20, 2020 08:43PM by PeggyG6020

I used Buff, they can be neck gaiters, or a variey of ways to wear as a hat. I preferred hats to scarfs. Someone gave me some scarves, and I really did not like them as much as the Buffs. In the winter I also liked Smartwool hats. They are thin and keep you very warm.

Diagnosed 8/1/14, oncotype 28, Crohns'disease. Age 58 when diagnosed. Dx 8/1/2014, ILC, Right, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2- (DUAL) Surgery 8/24/2014 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel Surgery 9/18/2014 Lumpectomy: Right Chemotherapy 10/14/2014 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 2/8/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 3/17/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 4/20/2015 Arimidex (anastrozole)

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