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Topic: the funny things kids say....

Forum: Humor and Games — Breast cancer is no laughing matter, but sometimes a good joke or a game is the best medicine.

Posted on: Apr 8, 2008 02:50PM

AlaskaDeb wrote:

A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class.  She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.  It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders.  Their insight may surprise you.  While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

1.  Don't change horses              until they stop running. 

2.  Strike while the                      bug is close. 

3.  It's always darkest before     Daylight Saving Time. 

4.  Never underestimate the power of         termites. 

5.  You can lead a horse to water but           How? 

6.  Don't bite the hand that          looks dirty. 

7.  No news is                impossible 

8  A miss is as good as a             Mr. 

9.  You can't teach an old dog new           Math 

10.  If you lie down with dogs,         you'll  stink in the morning. 

11.  Love all, trust                     Me. 

12.  The pen is mightier than the                pigs. 

13.  An idle mind is                    the best way to relax. 

14.  Where there's smoke there's               pollution. 

15.  Happy the bride who                gets all the presents. 

16.  A penny saved is                  not much. 

17.  Two's company, three's          the Musketeers. 

18.  Don't put off till tomorrow what       you put on to go to bed. 

19.  Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and                                                   You have to blow your nose. 

20.  There are none so blind as     Stevie Wonder. 

21.  Children should be seen and not      spanked or grounded. 

22.  If at first you don't succeed    get new batteries. 

23.  You get out of something only what you 

See in the picture on the box 

24.  When the blind lead the blind      get out of the way. 

25.  A bird in the hand            is going to poop on you. 

26.  Better late than                       Pregnant 

glassylady41.spaces.live.com/ Dx 2/29/2008, IDC, 3cm, Stage IV, Grade 2, 27/32 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Apr 10, 2008 03:07AM - edited Apr 10, 2008 03:07AM by newter

Thanks, I have a 6 year old first grader so I really enjoyed this.

DX 1/06 IDC 1.7 cm, Stage 2A, Grade 3, 2/5 nodes, ER+/PR+/HER2-, BRCA1 +
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Apr 10, 2008 11:36PM takingcare wrote:

If ever you need to lift your spirits, spend time with a child.  They are God's great wonders and such blessings!

Laughter is... God Smiling Dx 8/8/2005, IDC, 5cm, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 0/1 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 2, 2009 08:48PM footprintsangel wrote:

This is a Good way to remember our friend

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Feb 2, 2009 09:04PM toyful wrote:

Here is a true story about my 6 year old daughter.

My grandma had died and she had an open casket for family viewing only. I was really concerned about what my daughter would say when she saw Great Grandma in the casket. She came in the room, glanced at the casket and announced quite jollily, "I know where GG is," while we kind of held our breath for the rest of the sentence. She finished her statement saying, "She is up in heaven." We thought it was pretty smart that she figured out that GG was not in her body but had passed on to a better place.

Michelle in Seattle Dx 1/20/2008, 3cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 2/17 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 2, 2009 10:13PM footprintsangel wrote:

I think kids are a very special part of our healing

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Feb 2, 2009 10:20PM Marple wrote:

Thanks Foot!!!

Dx 2006, IDC, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 1/14 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Feb 2, 2009 10:27PM bkc wrote:

That is so funny. I've read it twice and it still makes me laugh.

My 4 year old pronounces YELLOW as Wellow. I have been correcting her for weeks. Today she said with a roll of the eyes and a huge sigh "Mommy, if I say YELLOW would you PLEASE let me wear my WELLOW  jacket!

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 3, 2009 08:33AM lvtwoqlt wrote:

My mom tells the story of my siblings and I spent the weekend at my grandmother's house when my mom was in the hospital having the youngest brother (I think we were about 6,4,and 3) and when she was fixing breakfast she burnt the toast and my older sister (the 4 yr old) told grandma she didn't like chocolate toast.

Women are like tea bags, we don't know how strong we are until we were thrown into hot water. Eleanore Roosevelt Diagnosed ADH Feb 2005, ADH Sept 2006 Surgery 2/11/2005 Lumpectomy: Left Surgery 9/9/2006 Lumpectomy: Right Hormonal Therapy 10/11/2006 Dx 4/27/2007, DCIS, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/7 nodes Surgery 5/31/2007 Mastectomy: Left, Right
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Feb 3, 2009 08:53AM bkc wrote:

Funny Funny

 Every morning my husband brings me coffee in bed. It is well known and a standing joke that I must have my coffee or I can't function.

Last fall he took an overnight trip out of town.

At 5am my then 3 and 4 year old daughters woke me up with Coffee Cake. Their recipe

Bag of sugar

Bag of flour

Half can of coffee

Water

Mix all ingredients together on kitchen floor. Place on paper plate and deliver to mom in bed.

No need to bake.

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 6, 2009 10:02PM footprintsangel wrote:

I bet that tasted good, Did you have any?

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Feb 7, 2009 08:46AM bkc wrote:

Actually after I sat down on the floor and cried and my 4 year old asked if they were happy tears (I think I was laughing and crying at the same time)  I did take a taste.Very Bad!  We spent the entire day cleaning up  (HUGE MESS)  and then made cup cakes.

 Even after steam cleaning the carpet I still have little girl foot prints that lead from the kitchen to my bedroom. Stain just will not come out. Carpet guy said  the only thing we can do is change the carpet.

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 11, 2009 08:15PM footprintsangel wrote:

Kids are one of the greatest ways to help us remember all the good times

A childs, " I love you."  

A Kids hug

To a ouch that is made better by a kiss.

 My nephew told me on time that he knew everything, I ask him what is everything?

I dont know he said, But I know! He was making sand cookies at that time and they do taste better bkc.

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Feb 14, 2009 07:44PM footprintsangel wrote:

When I was a kid ask my mom where he came from, I was told a stork brought me

and left me at the door.  And I told all my friend that storks bring kids.

What did your mom tell you?

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Feb 14, 2009 08:01PM bkc wrote:

Don't remember ever asking my mom but remember her saying every time Daddy hung his pants on the bed post another baby showed up. They had 8 kids. Took me along time to figure that one out!!!!!

I told my 5 year old that Jesus brought her to me and one day when she was mad at me she said "Well I think Jesus dropped me off at the wrong place!

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 16, 2009 09:25AM pip57 wrote:

When I told my daughter where babies come from, she scrunched up her nose and was clearly thinking very hard.  Then she says, "I don't ever remember seeing you and Dad do that!"

PIP - multi focal, FEC100/Tax, rads, dble mast with no recon, ooph/hyst, arimidex Dx 2/1/2007, DCIS/IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIIB, Grade 2, 9/16 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Feb 18, 2009 08:50PM bkc wrote:

On the way to school this morning my 5 year old daughter asked "Mama how old will I be when I fall in love?" "Oh hopefully sometime around when you're 20 or 25 when you're all grown up." I said.

"Well when I grow up I sure hope I grow up and fall in love with my friend Dally. (This is a little boy in her class)

I just smiled and said "Maybe so".

After she went inside I sat in the car with tears in my eyes. My baby has her first crush!

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 18, 2009 08:56PM footprintsangel wrote:

25 is pretty old to fall in love mom

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Feb 18, 2009 09:14PM bkc wrote:

I know I know. Just trying to convince myself she's still my baby at least for a little while longer. Is 20 more years to much to ask? lol

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Feb 19, 2009 08:03AM kim40 wrote:

My son was in Grade 5 when they started to have "the talk" at school.  I told him that once he seen the film, I am open to any questions that he may have.  So, when he came home, I ask him how it went.  He expressed his concerns over me having eggs and thought that if I don't conceive, do I go into the bathroom and lay them like a chicken!!!

Kim "I Run for Life" - Melissa Ethridge Dx 1/6/2009, IDC, 5cm, Stage IIIC, Grade 3, 14/19 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+
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Feb 24, 2009 09:22PM footprintsangel wrote:

When I was young I was told about the tooth fairy. I always wonder where the tooth fairy

lived and how she knew when someone lost a tooth. She just knew. I ask what she did

with the rotten ones, She told me they were remodeled. I believed her

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Mar 4, 2009 08:10PM footprintsangel wrote:

There was a child in the store today, He ask his mom if he would grow up to be like other guys

She ask him why? Cause some guys are like Santa claus, Can I be too and give gifts?

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Mar 7, 2009 04:43AM newter wrote:

Last week we had friends visit.  When they are mad at their 4 year old they call him by his first and middle name (Thomas).   One day the little boy was mad at his mom and called her Mommy Thomas.

So funny.

DX 1/06 IDC 1.7 cm, Stage 2A, Grade 3, 2/5 nodes, ER+/PR+/HER2-, BRCA1 +
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Mar 13, 2009 08:22PM footprintsangel wrote:

There was a little boy in church thats mom told the 3 kids to be quiet. He looked at his two sisters and loudy told the that they where in church to be quiet. Mom turned red.

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Apr 1, 2009 08:42PM footprintsangel wrote:

 Some little kid ask his mom what she would be when she grows up?

She told her she would be just like her, cause she was so nice.

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Apr 8, 2009 10:01PM footprintsangel wrote:

When I think  of all the ways Alaska Deb made us smile, I think we should keep the smile going for her.

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Apr 20, 2009 09:50PM footprintsangel wrote:

A kid ask me how many years til I can have kids. Im in my fifties

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Apr 24, 2009 10:23PM bkc wrote:

My 4 year old came home from daycare today and told me her friends mom had a baby in her tummy. Later on she was walking around with her baby doll under her shirt. I asked her what she was doing and she said she had a baby in her tummy. I asked what she was gonna do when it was born and she said send it to grandmas!

Dx 2/14/2008, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/12 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Jun 1, 2009 07:52PM - edited Jun 1, 2009 07:53PM by footprintsangel

When I was young my Aunt told my a stork dropped my brother down the chimney.

I ask why he wasnt a ash color then.

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Jun 3, 2009 08:09PM kbugmom wrote:

My grands hamster when they first got it liked to bite. Thankfully has stopped biting . A few days ago I asked Jordan was Peanut still being good not biting. She said he is being good. She was real quiet on the phone not listening to what I asked next so I said Jordan you arent biting Peanut are you. She says Grandma and starts yelling to her siblings and parents Grandma wanted to know was I biting Peanut. Well I got her attention.

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Jun 7, 2009 10:08PM footprintsangel wrote:

Without this little kids, There wouldnt be joyful a Christmas, Birthday full of happiness.

A tears that we can always wipe or Artwork we dont understand, but its beautiful              Childern are a very special gift.

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