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Topic: My experience

Forum: Prayers and Spiritual Support —

A safe place to find comfort in and share words of prayer, healing, and encouragement.

Posted on: Jan 22, 2011 07:47AM - edited Jan 22, 2011 07:48AM by edot

edot wrote:

I was diagnosed with breast cancer on dec 21, 2010. Coincidentally, this was the day in 1990 that we brought my mother home from the hospital to die - of breast cancer. I had my lumpectomy dec 30, and saw the oncologist for the first time January 14, 2011.

During this time, the image of my mother was very strong. My sister and I cared for her at the very end with help from my aunts, father and hospice. We told her that last weekend how much we loved her, but if she wanted to go, we knew she'd watch over us. I am not religious, but I think there is a strong spiritual connection.

When I first was diagnosed, all I could think about was my mother's own experience with breast cancr, but as my results came back and I wen through surgery, I knew it was different. I have a different prognosis, and it is a different time.

So on the way back from our meeting with the oncologist, we were driving along the highway and it suddenly became sunny and we could see the alps - it was beautiful. And I had this moment like a shock, and I felt that I let go of my mother, she let go of me - our histories need not be the same.

Later when I was telling someone about this, I recalled the time. It was the time of day that she died, exactly 20 years ago.

God, angel or just the subconscious freeing me from the past, who knows. But I feel as though I am able to follow my own path, and it will not be the same. And perhaps it is a gift from my mother - who knows?

Wasn't sure where to put this... Seemed like it fit here.

Take care

dx 2010, stage II, 0 nodes. Blogging at Dx 12/2010
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Jan 22, 2011 07:52AM chrissyb wrote:

Edot, what a beautiful story!  You are right when you say you have your own path to travel with BC as it is not the same for everyone, thank goodness.  I am sure your mother has given you her peace.  I wish you well in your journey.

Peace, strength, love n hugs.  Chrissyb

I found my peace which gave me strength. 52 at dx. Dx 12/8/2003, IDC, 4cm, Stage IV, Grade 2, 0/12 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-

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