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Sep 10, 2019 07:55AM
I'm dealing with anger right now--was dx'd w/ melanoma in August, 2017, fractured my pelvis May 2018, and dx'd with BC this past April.
Oh and I'm a survivor of childhood sexual abuse.
So yes, I'm really at my limit, I've had enough and I'm so incredibly fucking tired of people saying I'm lucky, or I'm strong or I've got this or (fill in the blank with any well meaning platitude).
No, I'm not lucky.
I'm not particularly strong, either.
I don't know that I've got this. Stay tuned until I hopefully die from something different.
I'm in therapy because everything I already dealt w/ from the sexual abuse is back with a vengeance. The PTSD is destroying me. And my best coping strategy for all of this is running--which is compromised from radiation treatments.
So fist bump in angry solidarity.
Tried the tamoxifen, no thanks.
4/9/2019, DCIS/IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC)
5/5/2019 Lumpectomy; Lymph node removal: Sentinel
5/6/2019, LCIS, Left, <1cm, 0/1 nodes
6/2/2019 Whole-breast: Breast
9/22/2019 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)