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Oct 24, 2011 03:10AM
, edited Oct 24, 2011 03:46AM
Thank you so much for your post, you took the words right out of my head! I just finished Rads (Fri) and start tomoxafin Monday. I have a 6 and 8 year old and though I worry about always being here for them, I must confess that they were the ones that got me thru treatment (which was not all that bad - especially now that it is behind me!!!). The kids kept me from curling up in a little ball and giving up. I had to MAKE myself "ok" when going through my treatments because of them. Because they are always watching.It is tough on those of us with little ones but I wonder if they actually help us to get through?
I was so frightened when dx'd but the day that I started chemo was the big earth quake in Japan. I thought of all of those thousands of peope whose lives ended in just a matter of minutes. I realized in that moment how very fortunate I actually am. I was given a second chance, the gift of time, to say and do the things that none of those victims of the quake had a chance to do. I thought I was "unlucky" at first, I think I am one of the luck ones now.
I am in a herceptin trial (they've seen some great results in her2 negative gals, not just her2 positive) and though I hope my cancer never returns, I am banking on the fact that my treatments have bought me the gift of more time. I know better treatments/the cure is around the corner. I intend to be here to see that day!
I am 9 months down the path but the things I have learned this past year almost outweigh everything I learned the 44 years that preceeded it. Honestly! I read this quote recently and totally agree.
Bill Hemmer: "You said cancer changes your life, and oftentimes for the better."
Joel Siegel: "Yes.... Gilda Radner... said this in her book. What cancer does is, it forces you to focus, to prioritize, and you learn what's important. I mean, I don't sweat the small stuff. I used to get angry at cab drivers. It's not worth it.... And when somebody says you have cancer, you realize it's all small stuff. And what Gilda said is, if it weren't for the downside, everyone would want to have it. But there is a downside."
~American Morning, CNN, 13 June 2003
Sorry for rambling!
Thank you to my breast cancer sisters for helping me along!
1/20/2011, ILC, 4cm, Stage IIIa, Grade 1, 5/10 nodes, mets, ER+/PR-, HER2-