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Topic: Bonfire of the Goddesses

Forum: Moving Beyond Cancer —

Managing life after a breast cancer diagnosis, including rediscovering intimacy, coping with fear of recurrence, reconnecting relationships, sharing hobbies and interests, and finding inspiration in daily life.

Posted on: Jan 23, 2011 11:28PM - edited May 20, 2017 09:34PM by jo1955

jo1955 wrote:

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Posts 61 - 90 (10,261 total)

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Jan 28, 2011 05:44PM geewhiz wrote:

I am throwing in those hideous paper germ masks they give you every chemo visit. A few of the zillion plastic name bracelets I got at each treatment. Those NASTY blue socks with the non skid bottom acquired at each surgery. My onc...she needs to feel some heat too. She is young, and needs a little searing to understand I think.I am also throwing the words "So, how are you doing?"  said in a sad voice in there. I have LOTS of that coming at me, no shortage anticipated.

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Jan 28, 2011 08:35PM Anjanita wrote:

geewhiz, my slipper sox are purple.  And not only do they have the no skid stuff on the bottom but also on the top of the foot. 

I suppose that works well for those days when a person feels a little fuzzy-brained.  But, drat, no matter how I put them on it looks like they are upside-down!

 I don't have any practitioners I'd like to incinerate but I was thinking the other day it would be nice to take the wide assortment of specialists, techs, nurses, aids and everybody I've had to see close enough to the fire to melt them down into a couple of people who tracked me all the way through.

 I suppose you could call this a cranky old person rant but I remember when the same doctor who birthed you operated on you and did all the diagnosing/ongoing care.  If you had a good doctor he knew you inside out and you didn't have to try to remember all the little idiosyncracies of your health to fill him in if he hadn't had time to read your ever-growing charts.

 Modern specialized medicine, with all it's miracles great and small, also has its disadvantages.  And the thing I miss the most is that personal touch.

Gratitude is the attitude! Dx 10/2010, ILC, Stage II, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2+
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Jan 28, 2011 10:53PM catbill wrote:

Beccad,

I'll go a little easier on the radiologist if you think I should, but in my case, he was in the room watching the ultrasound as it was being done, not in another room.  He did the biopsy immediately after the US, and he never said a word to me about what he was seeing.

Oncotype 8, no chemo, no rads, bilat mastectomy, on Arimidex Dx 9/29/2010, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 28, 2011 10:57PM crusader1 wrote:

Hi,

My radiologist did my biopsy and then got the path results. I went directly thru him and thus he broke the news to me. Let him burn..No feeling at all..Cold as a cucumber..I hope the fire may warm him up a bit..

Hugs,

Francine

At the end of this tunnel will be sunshine! It is a sunny day! Dx 9/12/2008, ILC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Jan 29, 2011 04:16AM raeinnz wrote:

I want to throw on the onc who at the end of the one and only 15 min visit I had said 'you have a very good prognosis bc, but take Femara as insurance, I don't need to see you again, but feel free to contact me if you have any concerns' and for that he charged me $400.

PILC, BMX with immed recon Feb 09. No chemo. No rads. Femara. Courage is being afraid but going on anyhow. Dx 1/20/2009, ILC, 2cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 29, 2011 09:17AM badger wrote:

Great thread!

I'd like to throw in most of the items in the heavily commercialized survivors 'goodie-bag' from the RFC last year.  It's nice to be recognized as a survivor but I wish they'd just donate the money instead of spending it on chachkies.  It's a reminder that BC is big business and we're a target market.   But I will 'fess up that I ate the tiny packet of jelly beans.  {{hugs}}

7,715.5 miles walked ~ Find your calm. Move forward from this place. Dx 12/22/2009, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 29, 2011 09:38AM jo1955 wrote:

I want to throw in all the people who spread rumors and don't even have the right information.  I manage a mobile home/RV park for people that are 55+ a nd boy can they talk.  There is a rumor going around the park about me that my cancer is back - they must know something I don't.  It is known that I just had a CT & bone scan done - I don't even know the results yet.

Hate those that spread untruths. 

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Jan 29, 2011 11:41AM molly52 wrote:

I was so sore after my surgeries I tried to make my own bra.  Never did finish it.  I think it is time it went in the fire.

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Jan 29, 2011 11:47AM 1Athena1 wrote:

raeinnz,

I will help to stoke that fire so that the onc who treated you thus burns well and good! 

I have an idea for how to stoke it: throw in my "first opinion" onc (I am now treated by my "second opinion") who said I was "risk averse" because I refused chemo. Don't you hate it when people use pop psychology when they don't know what the ?$#@% they are talking about and they don't appear to listen to or care about your reasoning? If that woman knew half of what I have done in the world of risks she would probably be the first to faint. 

To her "credit", she only charged me $300. :-) 

Anyone diagnosed with cancer should learn to have a healthy disrespect for statistics. Statistics are maths. It's the science which still eludes us. Dx 3/2009, IDC, 3cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 3/8 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 29, 2011 12:36PM pip57 wrote:

I would like to throw in the Ace bandage wraps that I have had to wear since chemo 3 years ago.  But I can't.  I still need the stupid things.

So I will throw in the front button pjs that were so handy during surgeries.  Won't need them anymore cause there is nothing left to remove! 

PIP - multi focal, FEC100/Tax, rads, dble mast with no recon, ooph/hyst, arimidex Dx 2/1/2007, DCIS/IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIIB, Grade 2, 9/16 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 09:19AM prayrv wrote:

I would like to throw in the Ultrasound Radiologist (not the tech), that while doing the ultrasound on the suspiscious area identified on my MRI, says "My that looks invasive!" and then proceeds to do an US guided biopsy.

Dx 4/27/2007, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/5 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 10:13AM JanetinVirginia wrote:

Here comes the first surgeon who did the biopsy.  I called and called to get results.  When he finally called me back he said it had "just come in."  WRONG.  When I got a copy of the path report that had been faxed to him, it was date stamped the day before he called!!!!  What a jerk.  Needless to say, I found a breast surgeon associated with a NCI center for mastectomy. 

Dx 9/1/2010, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 10:38AM - edited Jan 30, 2011 10:39AM by crusader1

Hi,

More stuff to throw away and burn.

How about the rubber gloves which the visiting nurse used to change my dressing on my Vac machine three times a week. She left many ..but I do use them to dye my hair. Maybe we could burn some of the many leftover gauze pads from my nine surgeries. Of course there are many tubes of bacitracin..

This is fun soon many of my bad memories will be all gone.

Keep em  going ladies.

Jo..too bad about those rumors..Let's burn them too.

Can't wait to se the size of this bonfire.

Hugs,

Francine

At the end of this tunnel will be sunshine! It is a sunny day! Dx 9/12/2008, ILC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 11:03AM jo1955 wrote:

How about all the painful memories associated with BC.  I would like to also throw in the "roller coaster" we have all been on.

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Jan 30, 2011 11:12AM badger wrote:

Step back, ladies, there may be a flare of flames with this one!  I'd like to throw in the extra weight I've gained (and am having a heckuva time losing).  Twenty pounds of fat should sizzle like a sonofagun!

7,715.5 miles walked ~ Find your calm. Move forward from this place. Dx 12/22/2009, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 02:23PM iodine wrote:

Oh, if only it was that easy!  I have about made friends with my fat.  It just is.  I've tried to exercise it away, but wound up with back surgery and hip replacement.  Tell me it will sizzle and I'll throw it in!

Dotti---BE NOT AFRAID, Pope John Paul
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Jan 30, 2011 02:32PM badger wrote:

LOL Dotti, if only is right!  Smile  But it's a virtual bonfire, so.....   sizzle sizzle sizzle

7,715.5 miles walked ~ Find your calm. Move forward from this place. Dx 12/22/2009, IDC, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 1/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 03:35PM jo1955 wrote:

Just came across  a partially used bottle of Aloe Vera gel.  That is going in now.  May it burn for hours - along with the stupid body mold from radiation treatments.

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Jan 30, 2011 04:00PM Sandeeonherown wrote:

YES!!!!! Can I join in too? I am going to toss im my unscented soap too. ICK!...and the ugly johnny shirts from the hospital....thank god they weren't pink...and a key chain thing someone gave me with the pink ribbon....I was not at a place where I was making it public an dthat really threw me so...in it goes too! What else..???? Think I will keep my aloe vera gel for summer time but I would be happy to toss in the t-shirs that got stained as a result of having to put it on a number of times each hour during and after rads! So..out with the stained t shirts!

Great new discussion...a galpal of mine would say the " nofire of the goduses"...as in "god is within us all"...

Sandee... still here,still grateful and still the happiest person I know!
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Jan 30, 2011 04:02PM Sandeeonherown wrote:

Mamashells...maybe we should start a discussion for women who were left by their husbands/partners/significant others either pre-diagnosis or post event....hard to get onwih getting on when you are grieving other things (or angered or hurt by them...whatever stage we may be at)...

Sandee... still here,still grateful and still the happiest person I know!
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Jan 30, 2011 04:17PM Sandeeonherown wrote:

ok...I am on a roll now....I am also going to add the mammogram technician who essentially told me I had cancer with her body language and comment "enjoy the rest of your day" when everyone else who had been waiting got a "See you in a year!!" in a perky voice...and while I already gave away he button up shirts I was told I would need to wear post-surgery, I would like to toss them in metaphorically speaking too...don't ever want to see them again....can I toss in the fabrics that hurt my skin for the first few months after surgery? Or my insensitive boss who thought it appropriate during radiation to point out an error in a memo I had sent to teachers to read to students....rather than commending me on actually going to work 37.5 hours a week and keeping a smile on my face.

Can't think of anything else yet but boy..this purging feels goood!!!

Sandee... still here,still grateful and still the happiest person I know!
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Jan 30, 2011 05:21PM jo1955 wrote:

sandee - You can toss in whatever you want.  It does not have to be just articles of clothing or tubes of cream - I have tossed in a few people and some emotions already.  There are no restrictions here.  It is definitely a place to purge.

Come back anytime you want. 

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Jan 30, 2011 05:24PM lovemyfamilysomuch wrote:

Guilt over being sick.  I know it is irrational! xo

Dx 10/14/2008, IDC, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 2/7 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 05:25PM jo1955 wrote:

lovemyfamilysomuch - It is not irrational - it is what you feel and want to get rid of - this is the place to do it.

Jo - Lump, no chemo, 25 rads + 5 boosts, Tamox X5 years . cancerr free since Aug 30th, 2010. April 2014 - Latissimus Dorsi Flap Reconstruction. July 13, 2013 - Hysterectomy due to multiple uterine issues while on Tamoxifen.
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Jan 30, 2011 05:31PM kathleenm wrote:

Everyone throw in their surgical bras! Who invented those anyway? It had to be a man! LOL

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Jan 30, 2011 05:56PM - edited Jan 30, 2011 05:57PM by Maya2

Yup, I've got aloe vera and some greasy stuff from 9 years ago! And one rad tech who was just not in the right line of work. Yell Burn, baby, burn. Oh yes, there's that stupid key chain! In it goes. And all the people who didn't know what to say, so they said something truly hurtful. And one last thing, breast cancer stamps!

Is it hot in here, or is it just me?!  Embarassed

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Jan 30, 2011 06:33PM lovemyfamilysomuch wrote:

Thanks Jo!  Okay, I will add a few of those stupid pink keychains, hideous---xo

Dx 10/14/2008, IDC, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 2/7 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 06:42PM mbtlcsw01 wrote:

Throwing in those cammisoles that held the drains with little fake boobs, the cancer center that missed all this years ago by not ordering an MRI (real dense breast tissue), all my makeup and skin care products that have parabens in them, head scarves that I wore and hated... I'll think of more.  Great thread.

Mary Dx 10/16/2008, IDC, 1cm, Stage I, Grade 3, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR-, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 07:19PM lovemyfamilysomuch wrote:

Love this thread sisters.  Thanks!

Dx 10/14/2008, IDC, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 2/7 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 30, 2011 07:58PM Sandeeonherown wrote:

Love this thread indeed....going to toss in an insensitive, passive-aggressive student I am forced to work with right now...he is sapping my post-radiation energy !!! thanks for creating this thread...feels good to verbally purge indeed!!! let 'er burn!!

Sandee... still here,still grateful and still the happiest person I know!

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