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May 23, 2018 04:31AM
Agatha- welcome to our thread. Please do not beat yourself up for feeling you have done something wrong at home. I think all of us can tell you during cancer treatment and beyond, a lot of things just have to get parked to focus on getting through treatment, and beyond. We are all doing the best we can through this stuff.
Couple ideas to start:
1) Let go of the idea of how much you spent on things, even if they are not going to be of use to you or others now. That keeps us all hanging on to things. Also, as you begin sorting, try to look at things more with how you value them, like "this is something I really love and want to keep" vs. this is just stuff to me. It will help you compile the things that need to go quicker so you can figure out how to get those out of your place.
2) Ask a friend to help, but if you don't have one you are comfortable with, if you know a teenage girl, invite her in to help you organize and sort. Tell her she can keep some of the things as her compensation (she might like the make up). Kids tend to be less judgmental about things. I used to clean and help some elderly relatives and would help them sort through some things they were needing to do things with. I worked with a business coach that said when you are doing anything mundane (like sorting through paperwork), listen to some good music, enjoy a favorite beverage just to make it all more do-able.
3) I am the person who takes too big clothing and brought it to consignment where you can get money or buy things on credit. It helped me to get some $$$ for expensive business clothing that was too big and hardly worn. Usually needs to be less than five years old for them to take it in, where I live. Since you mentioned you don't have a car, it may be hard to get it to a place like this. Are you in NYC? If you are, I know they have some nice consignment stores there. Worth calling a few to see what they will take? Some are very high end and others may take a variety of brands.
4) I am also the one who gave the tip on Staples. I have a home based consulting business and had a hard time keeping up with client documentation shredding after some things were finished and ended up figuring this out with time. Staples also sells good containers/bins to put the stuff in and they shred a lot for very little $$$.
5) With hobbies, look at where else things can be re-purposed, recycled, reused. Schools will always take art/paper supplies, if you knit or crochet, assisted living or nursing homes might like the supplies for some of their residents. They might like some books too, the big kind with great pictures are great for seniors. My mother used to love looking at art books (pictures of paintings) when she was in assisted living.
6) If you have old business suits or clothing, there are places that help women get back in to the work force (YWMA's My Sister's Closet) where you can donate outfits, purses, shoes to help women who may be needing help after leaving a difficult situation and need to get working to take care of themselves.
7) Start small, you sound like you have lots to do and that can feel overwhelming. Work on a pile to start or corner of a room, get some containers to sort things just to get a surface clean, and continue on an area or part of a room until you see clearing.
8) Oh and those brother's of yours? Give them a job if they have transportation of their own. Tell them you are working to get some things removed from the apartment and get their help to take things away. If it is old appliances you want to leave by the roadside, have them do that for you. They might willingly help you with something where they can pick up items and drop them off, easy for them and really helps you. They probably do want to help, but having them in criticizing your space is just not helpful so you have to give them another task to do.
Those are a few opening suggestions. Ask questions?
9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
11/15/2012 Lumpectomy: Left, Right
11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel
11/15/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Sentinel
3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)