Feb 20, 2013 06:33PM GML wrote:
Welcome Bobo to a club you don't want to belong to but a great group of women just the same.
You do know your own body best. Always trust that. I've always been told I had fibrous breasts so when I felt my mass, which was quite large, I didn't know what to think. I felt it in May. My partner wanted me to get it checked out but I was in between GPs and about to have my gall bladder removed. We felt it along the way and my partner seemed to think it was getting larger and then smaller in rhythm with my menstrual cycle. It felt the same to me. I saw GP in July. Mammo showed nothing, ultrasound showed nothing. Even after the biopsy where the doctor was saying "see that, that's not supposed to be there" as he pointed to a group of cells on the screen that looked different than the others, I was still stunned. I'm glad I opted for mastectomy as it was not confined to the mass but intertwined in the rest of my breast tissue; another thing that their tests did not detect. So, trust your body and trust your instincts.
I'm sorry about the lack of support. You say your partner is supportive but not wanting to talk about it and refusing to acknowledge reasonable fears doesn't sound supportive to me. My partner wanted to go to the biopsy consult appointment. I told her it was just a consult and that she should wait and come when he did the biopsy. She asked me repeatedly and I kept telling her it was just a consult. Turns out the consult ended up with the biopsy with which he was openly suspicious about and I almost got into a car accident trying to call my partner on the way home. After that, she refused to miss an appointment, even if it was a minor one.
It's hard on them in a different way. Actually harder I think. Sometimes I will wonder if its coming back and when and my partner will grow quiet. It's not because she doesn't want to be supportive but because the thought of it returning and the thought of me actually dying is more than she can take. Maybe that's where your partner is at.
In any event, I don't want to ramble on. I hope you get answers and peace of mind.