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Topic: Creamation

Forum: Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care — A unique forum ONLY for those trying to live well and/or trying to die well.

Posted on: May 31, 2009 10:36PM - edited May 31, 2009 10:37PM by NYCarol

NYCarol wrote:

Some of you have spoken about being creamated and a container for your ashes.  I plan on being creamated and would like to buy a container to hold my ashes until they can be scattered in a specific location.  They might be held somewhere for up to a year so I would like to buy something reasonably nice.  I have no idea what the size should be.  I am an average size woman.  What size container did you gals buy?

Note:  I have a friend who was really angry at his father when he died (he killed himself) so he drove around with the ashes in a plastic container rolling around in the back of his station wagon for 3 years before he scattered them.  Let's all hope that the person who is responsible for our ashes is not angry when we die!

Carol

Dx 4/2002, IDC, <1cm, Stage IV, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2+
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Jun 1, 2009 01:29AM pbcc1 wrote:

My best suggestion for a container that you like, would be to go to a local funeral home and see the sizes they have. Get an idea, and then check around or on the internet for possibly a better price, or different choices. If you google urn, you may find something you really like, and the funeral director will honor your wishes as long as you have an approved container.

God Bless and hope this helps you some.

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Jun 1, 2009 06:27AM saint wrote:

The niche we chose for our urns has a finished size of about a 12" cube. So considering this info I think you can manage with anything about the size of a shoe box--hold 2-3 pounds--I will call my funeral director friend today & update this later if I am wrong!

Be well & stay strong 

Life is not about waiting for the storms to end, but learning to dance in the rain! Orig dx Nov '00 stg1 gr3 0/27 pos nodes er/pr+ her2- mets dx apr '04 eyes & bones new dx jan '07 lung Dx ILC, 1cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 0/27 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jun 1, 2009 07:45AM Texgirl wrote:

Did not scroll thru all the posts on this subject so don't know if this has been suggested... but have found some beautiful urns/containers on the internet and Ebay...who'd a thunk it ?  I am of Czech descent and have found a Czech glass one that is gorgeous.....there are also ones that have matching small ones so that if you want some remains to go with children,etc.they can match the larger container....not planning on going anytime soon but do want to be cremated....

Dx 2/8/2005, ILC/IDC, Left, 6cm+, Stage IIIC, Grade 2, 22/22 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jun 1, 2009 07:48AM Analemma wrote:

I am a potter (well, retired) and a few years back there was a discussion of cremation urns, because some potters make them by request.  The consensus of volume it needs to hold, is "about as much as a shoebox" for an average size person.  I assume they meant an average size pair of shoes, as well!

Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. --John W. Whitehead Dx 12/10/2007, IDC, 2cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 5/12 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Jun 1, 2009 12:07PM dreamwriter wrote:

Size 6-8 and not boots.

Laugh until it really IS funny. Dx 12/20/2005, 6cm+, Stage IV, Grade 3, 18/18 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jun 2, 2009 06:51AM denise1962 wrote:

Here is an idea for creamation remains.

http://www.heartsongmemorybeads.com/index.html

I am going to have some beads made and then scatter the rest of me.

orig dx 5/7/06 IDC er,pr her2 postive 12/16 nodes pos Dx 7/7/2008, IDC, Stage IV, Grade 3, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Jun 2, 2009 10:02PM NYCarol wrote:

Thank you all so much.  Your posts are so informational and varied.  I will start searching tomorrow.  I think I'll skip going to the funeral home because I don't want to use a funeral home and I can imagine the owner calling me after I visit.  We have two local crematoriums and each has a beautiful chapel where a service can be held.  I am happy to hear that ashes can be expected to fit in a shoebox.  That leaves a lot of options open.

I find it strange sometimes that I am searching out and preparing for my own funeral service.  I am not sure if it is a control issue or worry that my husband will fall apart and not follow my wishes.  He is an engineer and likes things very orderly (and convential).

Dreamwriter....LOL about boots! 

Denise....The beads are really interesting.  Did you know, if you are rich you can have the ashes turned into a diamond and placed in a ring!

Dx 4/2002, IDC, <1cm, Stage IV, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2+
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Jun 3, 2009 03:21PM Analemma wrote:

have any of you heard of hypertufa?

http://davesgarden.com/community/forums/f/hypertufa/all/

It's a mixture of concrete and peat moss that you make into planters, etc.  If you knew a crafter, they could add your ashes in the mixture and make an outdoor planter or fountain.  That would be pretty cool.  I've made a couple of planters.  After a while they look like they were carved from old stone.

Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. --John W. Whitehead Dx 12/10/2007, IDC, 2cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 5/12 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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Jun 15, 2009 11:52AM dreamwriter wrote:

Cool.... what is the price range on a planter or a fountain?

Laugh until it really IS funny. Dx 12/20/2005, 6cm+, Stage IV, Grade 3, 18/18 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jun 15, 2009 02:46PM Analemma wrote:

I just lost myself on the Dave's Garden hypertufa forums.

At art fairs in the past few years, I've seen some artists who are making concrete leaf forms, fountains, etc.  I don't know any artists by name, but I bet Mr. Google does.  You could look for concrete art, garden art, hypertufa, and maybe find someone in your area.  I've only played around with hypertufa, but it would be kind of cool to become a garden fountain, or a bird bath.

Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. --John W. Whitehead Dx 12/10/2007, IDC, 2cm, Stage IV, Grade 3, 5/12 nodes, mets, ER-/PR-, HER2-
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May 31, 2015 10:33PM - edited May 31, 2015 10:34PM by Jay1999

NYCarol above is my mother. She passed on October 24, 2013.


She had wonderful atristic urns...against the wishes of the parlor who say some ash may stay behind, as designed earns were very smooth. We and she were ok with a little ash left.


We have spread most of her ashed in Marthas Vinyard as she desired. Still some left to spread when we reach those destinations.


Just though an update would be nice. Hope some of you are still here!


Jason

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Jun 1, 2015 12:02AM Meow13 wrote:

I want my ashes to be spread in the Caribbean nice clear warm water. I know I would not like the Costco urn with the pink ribbon. I don't want to be remembered with breast cancer. I am not afraid of death just afraid of months of suffering.

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Jun 1, 2015 05:20AM Moderators wrote:

Hi Jay1999, welcome to Breastcancer.org. We're sorry for the loss of your mom, and we wanted to thank you for posting and let everybody know here. Although this thread is quite old, we hope some of the folks that tried to be by her side here and giving support throughout, will read this, and will also thank you for the update. That's so nice of you!

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