Jan 11, 2012 03:54PM barbe1958 wrote:
When my aunt was diagnosed with appendix (?) cancer (that started it all), she was going to deny any chemo. I was angry when I talked to my Dad and said it was like she was giving up and not even trying. Then my Dad got lung cancer. He had treatment for 2 1/2 years. Surgeries, chemos, rads and more surgeries. At the end, he said if he knew he was going to die anyway, he'd have rather not made his last years so miserable. I felt a bit guilty, thinking us kids had kind of forced him in to at least 'trying'.
The point is, as you say, quality of life. Your sister might not have gotten sick until the very end. Most breast cancer patients don't die of the cancer, they die as a result of treatment!! Sad to say. But, it's only by getting the treatment that we can buy some time and even hopefully, go into remission.
So, yes, she probably would have had a much easier go of it, but she may have died sooner and it would probably have been painful as the cancer invaded her system. As for hospice, a loving doctor won't sit by her side, but you could! But, by doing the treatment, she had hope. Hope is pretty important to life.
My Mom worked in hospice at a local hospital for over 8 years before she became a patient. She knew that once she was in hospice it was only a matter of days. You don't spend months in hospice...usually just days. Denying treatment didn't mean she'd have to go immediately into hospice as the cancer wasn't invading her yet. Hospice is for the end of days, when you need pain meds to make your passing less painful.
Hope this helps....