Log in to post a reply
Sep 17, 2020 10:40AM
Peridot180---I could have written this post. I'm suffering from recurrent fissues over the past year, along with vaginal atrophy (totally the tamoxifen because I'm 42 and still getting periods), rectocele, an external hemorrhoid and skin tag, and tight pelvic floor. I'm under the care of urogyn, derm, colorectal, and pelvic floor PT.
I cried all the way to work today because I ripped open today in yet another place, and this is with reasonably soft (but large) stools. I take guar gum benefiber, and some magnesium citrate. Eat a lot of vegetables. I'm not constipated but that first bowel movement of the day is a struggle because (thanks to the rectocele) I have to "splint" the area to get it to come out by using perineal pressure. This often causes a fissure in an opposite spot because of opposite pressure. But what's a girl to do? And then I have 2-3 more loose bowel movements after that. Every day it's the same. If I back off of the fiber and mag, it's rock hard, but upping the mag to make it even looser just causes a rash. And they say you shouldn't keep stools loose all the time or the muscle will never work, but it doesn't work. It's like the tissue literally can't handle it. I've been starting to wonder if it's because of the tamoxifen. I say this because of the vaginal atrophy, as well as super sensitive and fragile gums. It's like my mucous membranes are just unhappy.
I'm under the care of a lovely colorectal surgeon, but I sense she's hesitant to try the ointments because I rash up extremely easily. Anything other than vaseline causes a rash in the rectal/anal area. Even blood from my period gives me a rash (and tampons just don't jive with vaginal atrophy). And I have some minor stool leakage at times, so I'm sure she's hesitant to do any sort of procedure in the area that could cause stool incontinence, then I'll have a permanent rash, you know?
My husband said to me this morning, after shrugging, that this might just be what I have to deal with in life. This was part of my crying in the car. I get what you mean about not wanting to deal with this for the rest of your life. Pooping is a nightmare but we have to do it every day. I worry and second guess everything I put in my mouth---because what issue is it going to cause. And then sitting the rest of the day....it's uncomfortable to sit. I also get tendon/joint discomfort, so standing and walking isn't great either. 42 years old. I'm going to start crying again...
:-( I figure I'll give this new fissure a week, and if it's not getting better, calling colorectal again. I don't know what she can offer though. I guess if she wants to try an ointment, better have derm on speed dial for emergency rash drama.
Dx IDC in October 2016, stage 2A, 1.2 cm ER/PR+ Her2-, Grade 2, 1/3 nodes. Mammaprint low risk luminal A, Lumpectomy + radiation + tamoxifen. Age 38 at diagnosis.