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May 12, 2013 11:05PM
Pain is such an interesting topic since our brains decode what we feel and attach meaning to it. Each person will describe something a little bit differently. prior experiences play into our perceptions too.
For me the joint pain of arimidex was like ground glass in your joints, just unrelenting aching and pain. I just didn't want to move. Even my accupuncturist tried leaving the needles in and could not get rid of the hip pain. I used to just LOVE my sessions, because Tagasshi could get rid of all the pain after chemo... I slept at times during accupuncture. But 6 months of the joint pain.. whew did me in. I wasn't given any pain relievers. I finally quit the drug and that got rid of the pain.
Neulasta shots were horrid. Like an intense pain from the inside out, everywhere and nowhere specific. Intense... it was doable because you knew it ended after a couple of days.. take the percocet. ugh.. nasty.
In the weeks leading up to my PET scan in April of 2012 I kept feeling this odd tingling sensation in my sternum and different places. I never felt anything like it and didn't know what to make of it. I couldn't decide if it was painful or just wierd. It was bone mets, but I didn't know it at the time. I also had a rib that clicked when I would breathe, but it didn't hurt. Then my other ribs started to ache on the right. That was small fractures, couldn't lay on my right side after a while. All of this annoying, but didn't stop me from activities. Those feelings were all bone mets; they hurt but didn't nail you.
Interestly, once the treatment started the faslodex and zometa made the pain worse not better. It took months of treatment to really feel better. I have one area in my back that when I stand for long periods or sit it just aches like heck and won't stop. Yet the scans say clear.. the pain stays on. Oh well.
To this day when I think of a pain score of 10, I remember splitting the bone in my lower leg as a ten year old. I fell off the edge of a barn roof.I screamed and rocked back and forth on the ground, in just crazy intense pain... off the charts. That is still my "10." To this day nothing hits that level. Four huge gall stones and a "knife in your back" and I would rate that a 9. I have had a couple of crazy painful back injuries and still 9s..8s. Bone pain like a quick long fracture is the worst. I was just frantic I hurt so bad and could hardly pull it together.. crying and gasping. I spent the entire summer on my back... leg up. ugh.
I have heard that bone cancer and bone pain is excruciating. This I can believe.How is it in some cultures a woman is supposed to be silent during birth and in other cultures scream through it all? Is it expectations and patterning, "it will be like this" and you behave accordingly? Like little kids who skin their knee and if they are engaged keep playing, but if Mom is watching... on come the tears!
1/2/2007, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIa, Grade 1, 1/17 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
4/2/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IV, Grade 1, 1/17 nodes, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2-
01/22/2007 Lumpectomy (Left); Mastectomy (Left); Lymph Node Removal: Sentinel Lymph Node Dissection, Axillary Lymph Node Dissection (Left); Prophylactic Mastectomy (Right)
03/01/2007 Adriamycin, Cytoxan, Taxol