Topic: The solution to painful intercourse!!!!!! Yipeee!

Forum: Stage IV/Metastatic Breast Cancer ONLY — Please respect that this forum is for members with stage IV/metastatic breast cancer ONLY. There is a separate forum for caregivers and friends: Caring for Someone with Stage IV or Mets.

Posted on: Oct 11, 2011 05:15PM

Posted on: Oct 11, 2011 05:15PM

LivingIt wrote:

Like so many of us, chemo, hormones and surgery have made my marital relations very very painful. Since all this started my DH and I have tried a total of 4 times over 2 years. That is soo sad I know. But it was so very painful I bled for 2 days after try number 3. Then I decided I wanted to try again cause Im so crazy about this guy. We had a date night and I did two things that ended up making me feel like I was 21 again (or a newly wed or however you want to think about it).

1) Scream Cream (thanks K-Lo)

2) 5% Lidocaine Ointment.

The first brings blood to the area and hightens sensation like you cant believe. The second makes the tearing pain DISAPPEAR!!!!

To get scream cream I brought this page to my onc and he wrote the script and I paid about $30. The lidocaine was perscribed for my neuropathic feet so it was free/insurance. 

I wish I could go back in time. I wish I could tell everybody who ever got chemo. I hope you try it if you have this problem.  

Zoh - Don't Postpone Joy!!!! 11/07 AC +Taxotere, then Tamoxifen x2yrs. Aromasin x 6 months, Taxotere x 1.5 yrs, Abraxane 2months, Tamoxifen 1 month, Xeloda Diva x 1 month crazy progression - Gemzar/Faslodex/Xgeva Dx 11/11/2007, IDC, 5cm, Stage IV, 2/8 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jun 21, 2013 01:24PM rgiuff wrote:

Tried zestra once.  It smells horrible, and for me, it did nothing.

I was able to get my old GYN  to prescribe estrace cream for me about 2 years ago, which my Med Onc okayed.  But he stipulated that I should only use a little dab around the outside.  And I was on tamoxifen at the time.  The good thing is that this was covered by insurance.  And my GYN retired, so now the new one is reluctant to prescribe any estrogen products.

Last year, I saw an internal medicine M.D., who is also holistic, and into bioidentical hormones, and she felt that estriol was fine to use.  She gave me a prescription for estriol/testosterone cream to be used vaginally.  This worked OK, but I only use it occasionally, as it is messy like the estrace.  And since it was compounded, it was not covered by insurance.  It costs about $50 a tube.

I have found something online that works nicely, although effect seems temporary compared to the estrogen products.  It's made by Carlson labs and it's suppositories that contain: vitamin E, palm oil, and coconut oil.  I use half of one and they are very soothing and also double as a lubricant.  I put half of one inside, and it does ooze out very quickly, so can't walk around after putting one in.

For those of you really suffering, I'd try different doctors until I found one that would consider quality of life as well as quantity.  My view is this: what is the point of increasing the quantity, if there is no quality?

RoseG Dx 4/2008, IDC, <1cm, Stage I, Grade 1, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 4/6/2008, IDC, Left, <1cm, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 5/20/2008 Lumpectomy: Left Radiation Therapy 8/20/2008 Breast
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Sep 23, 2013 05:53PM stagefree wrote:

Bump!

Dx 4/9/2012, IDC, Stage IV, Grade 1, mets, ER+/PR-, HER2- Chemotherapy 4/11/2012 Xeloda (capecitabine) Hormonal Therapy 8/24/2012 Hormonal Therapy 6/8/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole), Zoladex (goserelin) Chemotherapy 6/8/2016 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Xeloda (capecitabine)
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Nov 27, 2013 09:59AM ConnieGreene wrote:

sent a message to my dr asking....hoping hoping hoping! She is awesome but I am still embarrassed to ask for it by name

Dx 9/5/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 2/20 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Surgery 10/23/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Targeted Therapy 12/3/2012 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 12/3/2012 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 5/15/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 10/16/2013 Reconstruction (left): Nipple reconstruction; Reconstruction (right): Nipple reconstruction Hormonal Therapy 1/1/2014 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Jan 22, 2014 09:33PM ConnieGreene wrote:

I got the ok from my dr to use the lidocaine and got a bad UTI both times Bawling

Does the pain EVER go away?

Dx 9/5/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 2/20 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Surgery 10/23/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Targeted Therapy 12/3/2012 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 12/3/2012 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 5/15/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 10/16/2013 Reconstruction (left): Nipple reconstruction; Reconstruction (right): Nipple reconstruction Hormonal Therapy 1/1/2014 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Jan 22, 2014 10:24PM tasha_111 wrote:

Thank goodness SOMEONE tackled this very sensitive matter!   I had Chemo/Rads and Surgery for st 2 6 years ago, as I was living with a sex-obsessed schizophrenic... well it made no difference to him, it did however, hurt me a lot.  I am now totally anti-sexual, even though I have met the man of my dreams and we are soon to be married, he loves me and the intimacy of making love, yet he makes very few demands of me, I would love to be able to be more intimate with my wonderful man.  I sure as hell will give this combo a go.... Last time we tried I was hopelessly dry and the time before that I thought I was OK But then I split (Epesiotomy site), Kinda got a bit put off and scared (scared him too).  Thank you for this post, I will print it all off and present it to my Onco next week.  Thanks again J xxx

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Jan 25, 2014 10:46AM ConnieGreene wrote:

tasha - lots of lubrication!!! Once past that minute or two of entrance pain,it's really good. Unfortunately once I have had one orgasm - it goes back to hurting- I don't get it

Dx 9/5/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 2/20 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2+ Surgery 10/23/2012 Lymph node removal: Right, Underarm/Axillary; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Targeted Therapy 12/3/2012 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 12/3/2012 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 5/15/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 10/16/2013 Reconstruction (left): Nipple reconstruction; Reconstruction (right): Nipple reconstruction Hormonal Therapy 1/1/2014 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Jan 25, 2014 10:55AM TAB55 wrote:

Tasha, I'm not having pain.  After what you've been through with your sex-obsessed schizophrenic ex, it's no wonder that you still have pain. Forgive me if this is TMI, but I recommend masturbation, so you learn how to climax quickly. (Plus, it's fun.) I also regularly do Kegel exercises.  Good luck.  Having a sexual relationship with someone you love is one of the greatest joys there is.  It's worth working for it. I'm rooting for you.

Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim. Nora Ephron Dx 4/19/2012, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 1, 2/8 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 5/25/2012 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Left, Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 7/24/2012 Whole breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 9/17/2012 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone)
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Feb 9, 2014 11:01PM Cherrie wrote:

I finally got the nerve to talk to my oncologist. Both she and my OB-GYN approved go Vagifem. They felt this was safe for me. It takes a while and I am only two weeks into this. I will let you know how it goes. LOL

Dx 10/4/2002, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IB, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 10/21/2002 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Radiation Therapy 11/14/2002 Breast Hormonal Therapy 1/10/2003 Surgery 10/11/2011 Lumpectomy: Right Surgery 11/12/2012 Prophylactic mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): DIEP flap; Reconstruction (right): DIEP flap
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Feb 10, 2014 07:25AM Zillsnot4me wrote:

My ob recommended pelvic floor exercises. They work. No more pain upon entry/exit. They can't be any more embarrassing than what we've been through. My onc approved the estring. I'm still trying to get scream cream for myself. The big O is harder to achieve and different. Thanks tamox. 

8/6/21 Gemzar 1/7/2021 Axabrane 10/29/2020 Taxol 7/22/2020 A/A combo, 11 cm liver spots! piqray, zometa, faslodex 6/11/2020 rads to liver 12/2020 3 cm liver 10/2019, Liver spots 1/ 2016, Xgeva 9/2015, Bones 4/2015, Lungs 4/2013 Dx 4/2013, 4cm, mets, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 4/29/2013 Lymph node removal: Right; Mastectomy: Right; Prophylactic mastectomy: Left Chemotherapy 5/23/2013 AC Hormonal Therapy 10/2/2013 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy 11/6/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 9/25/2015 Prophylactic ovary removal Hormonal Therapy 1/7/2016 Femara (letrozole) Targeted Therapy 1/7/2016 Ibrance (palbociclib) Hormonal Therapy 2/4/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 4/24/2017 Faslodex (fulvestrant) Chemotherapy 11/16/2017 Xeloda (capecitabine) Dx 10/2019, metastasized to liver, ER+/PR+, HER2- Radiation Therapy Liver
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Feb 22, 2014 10:22AM - edited Feb 22, 2014 10:23AM by Bets4bama

This Post was deleted by Bets4bama.
Dx 11/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage I, 0/5 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2+ Surgery 12/4/2012 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Left Targeted Therapy 1/15/2013 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 1/15/2013 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Radiation Therapy 4/4/2013 Breast

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