Aug 24, 2017 10:53PM Leapfrog wrote:
At first you'll be in shock and disbelief. The disbelief can be with you for a long time but this isn't a bad thing, it protects you from the frightening place you've found yourself in and, once that has worn off, you can begin to accept what's happened and work on how to create a good life in this new reality. Try not to analyse too much or think about the past and what might have caused your cancer as that is futile now. At first it's bewildering and there's a lot to learn in a short time but just take it one step at a time.
There are a lot of stages to go through before you start to realise that life can be good. I know that from where you are right now that might seem strange but, for me, having Stage IV cancer with extensive bone mets has focussed my mind to what really matters in life and the following approach has worked for me:
Write everything down....I keep a day sheet with my drugs, the time to take them and I tick them off when I take them. Make a note of any side effects. Note down everything you're told to do as at first it's too hard to remember what you're told while you're in a blur of new drugs and pain killers.
Don't blame yourself.... you did nothing wrong, this is just rotten bad luck.
Learn to be selfish.... and by that I mean learn to put yourself first....a lot of women go through life making themselves their last priority...for me getting sick has taught me that I was there for everyone but myself and that had to change.
Take it one day at a time..... don't look at the future, just take your tablets, turn up for appointments and between those times find things that make you happy and concentrate on those.
Live in the moment.... each moment is a gift.
Appreciate what you have.... don't focus on what you've lost.
If you need encouragement....choose the threads applicable to your situation and call out for help. Support will come flooding in. We all care for each other and support each other. This is the place to go to when you want to say things you can't say to anyone else. We all understand how you're feeling.
This is a lot to process but, believe me, if you try to follow these steps you'll find that having cancer, frightening as the diagnosis is, doesn't have to scare you out of enjoying life.