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Sep 27, 2020 09:53PM
I hope that you are able to talk through all of your feelings with someone.
One thing a neurologist taught at a class was about sleep and stress, but it may help you.
Sit in a quiet place, and think of nothing but your missing breasts for 20 mins or so. Think if every little thing, positive and negative. How they look in the mirror, from each angle. How they make you feel- in the mirror, putting on clothes, putting on the seatbelt, seeing yourself in pictures. Whatever it is, think through it exhaustively.
If you do that for a few days, you eventually get sort of bored of it, and then find your mind going to other topics. I don't know the science behind it, but apparently we dwell on things when we don't address them exhaustively. I wonder if that's partly why it helps to talk to someone?
Anyway, this may not be up your alley, but I've noticed that it helps me with things I stress over.
Also- nothing is set in stone and you can write your own story. If you think being flat makes you too unhappy, there is always reconstruction.
Diagnosed at 42, Oncotype score 16, ITC in one node- considered node negative. Lost right implant to infection March 2020. Waiting to start reconstruction all over again.
4/8/2019, ILC, Left, 3cm, Stage IB, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
4/23/2019, ILC, Right, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
5/15/2019 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement
6/13/2019 Zoladex (goserelin)
8/5/2019 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel)
11/6/2019 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant