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Topic: CRAZY TOWN WAITING ROOM - TESTS coming up? All Stages Welcome.

Forum: Growing Our Friendships After Treatment —

For those who have met on Breastcancer.org and want to continue growing their cybersibling friendships beyond cancer.

Posted on: Jul 18, 2015 05:14PM - edited Feb 20, 2016 09:31PM by SlowDeepBreaths

SlowDeepBreaths wrote:

I'm hoping there isn't another thread like this. I did a search and saw one for stage 4, but nothing for everyone else. My very special friend on BCO (Tomboy), and I have talked about a Crazy Town thread for awhile now. I know she will be happy I finally took the bull by the horns!!

I wrote a little story about visiting Crazy Town last year on my blog, and I received some lovely emails from women all over the world talking about how terrifying those feelings can become. I thought I would share that story with my BCO sisters. I know many of you can relate to the craziness of worrying about recurrence or progression. I think my experience epitomizes the crazy place our minds can go. I've found when I can laugh at myself, I always feel better.

"My master bath has its own little room for the toilet. The sink, shower and tub are all in the same room. At night when I have to use the bathroom, I always turn on the closet light which is right next to my sink. This way I don't have to turn on all the lights above the sink. They are very bright and there are a lot of them. I do this so the brightness doesn't wake up my DH. Being the OCD person I am, I always wash my hands after using the restroom – even in the middle of the night.

One night last week, I was doing my usual ritual and I caught a glimpse of a big blackish/brown mark on the upper left side of my chest.This thing was huge. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest when I caught a glimpse of it. I'm sure many of you will know what I'm talking about - that feeling of dread.I ran my fingers over it and it felt raised. I couldn't imagine what it could be – it was SO big. I thought, "Oh great, here we go again, now I've got skin cancer." Then I decided to risk waking DH up by turning on the millions of lights above the sink. Then I got a closer look. UNBELIEVABLE!!……it was a piece of chocolate from a cookie I had eaten earlier!!!!! Apparently it had melted into my chest and I went to bed that way. Can you imagine?? Now if that doesn't give you a good laugh, I don't know what will. CRAZY TOWN!!!"

I have many stories since diagnosis. I call it going to Crazy Town. Some of them are funny, others not so much. I usually go there in the middle of the night when everyone is sleeping, and my mind wanders. There are no trains, planes or busses out of Crazy Town in the middle of the night. I also go there at times when I'm waiting on test results. I hope we can all share our Crazy Town stories. Talking about it has helped me to stay on the outskirts of the town. I've been really good about not visiting lately, but this week it's been a real challenge.

If you have tests coming up, or you just have a day where you're worried more than usual, or if you just want to hang out and chat, please stop in to visit. It is my hope we can have some fun here and get each other through on difficult days with humor, kindness and hugs!!

Much love to all,

Beppy ツ

P.S. If you've just been diagnosed, I strongly suggest starting a blog. Whether it be just for yourself, or you'd like to share it with others. It's been a good outlet to get my feelings out as well as a wonderful timeline to refer back to when needed.



Great info about breast cancer and PTSD:

http://www.healthline.com/health-news/cancer-treatment-leaves-survivors-with-ptsd-scars-031215#3


Dx 4/2016, TN mets to lung. VATS left upper lobe wedge resection. "Fall seven times, stand up eight" Japanese Proverb Dx 7/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Grade 2, 0/0 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2+ (FISH) Dx 7/2013, IDC, Left, 1cm, Grade 2, 0/0 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2- (FISH)
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Jul 21, 2018 03:12PM M0mmyof2 wrote:

Was so mad today after my mani/pedi. Went to try on the shoes I wore at my wedding to see if they would still fit and I couldn't get either of them on! So I went to the mall and got a nice pair of dark blue flats. Luckily they were on sale!


If you value your freedom, thank a servicemember both serving and retired!
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Jul 21, 2018 05:40PM ChiSandy wrote:

Octo, Jazzy over on the Drinking thread is in NM—Albuquerque or Santa Fe, I think.

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 22, 2018 06:54PM TaRenee wrote:

A few weeks ago I had my 3 month check and bloodwork with my MO. Most everything looks pretty good. I’m on low end of normal on iron so we are keeping an eye on that. But what freaked me out completely was my tumor marker went from an 8 (in April) to a 13. He says not to worry. Yeah, right. This is only my second check. Is that normal?

Dx 7/29/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 9/14/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left; Prophylactic mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy 9/25/2017 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery 3/29/2018 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant
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Jul 23, 2018 03:02PM april1964 wrote:

My oncologist doesn’t do tumor markers... is that customary? Should I ask him to do them?


oncotype 18 Dx IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jul 23, 2018 03:15PM Cubbie2015 wrote:

Mommy, in your pocket for your CT Scan!

Sandy, that cast sounds a lot more manageable than the old fashioned ones.O

Octo, in your pocket for your hubby's biopsy. Hopefully it's just one of those moles that decides to go a bit wonky as we get older. And congrats on the job!

Renee, tumor markers can go up and down because they also indicate inflammation. If your MO isn't worried, I would try to relax.

April, some doctors do tumor markers, some don't, and it also depends on your original diagnosis. I have a local support group friend who gets tumor markers, but she had some fairly advanced uterine cancer, which is why she gets the markers. And even then she had to switch oncologists to find one who would do the test.

I had my annual ophthalmologist appointment today, and tomorrow it's off to the MO for the six month checkup. This is not a fun time of year.

1.8mm micromet in sentinel node; BRCA negative; chose bmx due to family history; age 43 at diagnosis; Oncotype 15 Dx 9/4/2015, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 10/8/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right Radiation Therapy 12/17/2015 Whole-breast: Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 1/12/2016 Zoladex (goserelin) Hormonal Therapy 6/29/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Jul 23, 2018 06:37PM duckyb1 wrote:

Chi Sandy.....yes he is getting big.....and such a sweetheart....thank

Ducky Dx 2/15/2011, IDC, Right, 1cm, Grade 1, 0/8 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Radiation Therapy 4/24/2011 Whole-breast: Breast
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Jul 23, 2018 07:14PM TaRenee wrote:

Cubbie, Thank you. I don’t want to freak out and worry if there is no need. It caught me by surprise tho.

Dx 7/29/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 9/14/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left; Prophylactic mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy 9/25/2017 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery 3/29/2018 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant
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Jul 23, 2018 08:29PM ChiSandy wrote:

april, my MO doesn't do tumor markers for early-stage patients with negative followup mammos in the absence of symptoms, either.

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 23, 2018 09:42PM april1964 wrote:

ChiSandy, it’s interesting how doctors seem to differ with this. I can understand not doing the markers for early stages. Apparently other factors can influence the results as well.

oncotype 18 Dx IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jul 23, 2018 09:55PM ChiSandy wrote:

Had my cast re-molded today to give me an opposable thumb again. Makes driving & dressing easier, though bras are still frustrating.

My visit to CT is dental--over the past week I seem to have developed some sensitivity in the second incisors/cuspids on top, & bottom molars, L side. The spot behind my L upper incisor where the gum meets the hard palate is sore and feels boggy--and if I happen to be chewing and I bite down on on even a small piece of meat, veggie or Cheerio at that spot, it's exquisitely painful. Might tag along with Bob to his dental appt. tomorrow morning...but it's sooo early. And he parks several blocks away (I usually Uber it down if I'm in a hurry, or take the train if I'm not). I'm terrified I might be getting ONJ. Of course, the left nostril is stuffy, and the pollen & mold counts are high, so it could be sinus congestion. (No sign of bacterial infection). Gonna put some liquid benzocaine on it when I go to bed (brushed twice already with Sensodyne), maybe swish some Peridex first.

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 24, 2018 01:13AM Lucy55 wrote:

My doctor does the tumour markers , and I HATE it ...!!!!

Here's a photo of my new little poodle playing with my grand-daugter's teddy..,Her name is Honey ...We picked her up yesterday ...she is 8 weeks old ...I love her already 🤗



Dx 8/27/2014, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2014
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Jul 24, 2018 06:30AM proudtospin wrote:

lucy, your dog and the toy look absolutely adorable! Wonder if my alergies would let me have a dog? Do have fun with him.

Feeling pretty good since my doc reduced my pills, also i was able to see my last reports on the online portal, it takes 3 days, well they are all showing improvement! Yahoo

iris Dx 6/2008, DCIS, Stage 0, ER+ Dx 2/2017, Left, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 3, 1/1 nodes, ER+, HER2+
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Jul 24, 2018 10:46AM Molly50 wrote:

Octogirl, wow what a shock! Must be the shortest retirement on record! Congratulations on your new job. M0mmy, I hope the scan went well. Sandy, good news on the new cast and use of your thumb. My NP from dermatology called. It was a blue nevus on my eyelid. So nothing to worry about!

54 years old. Chek2 mutation. Family history of BC. Oncotype Dx 13 Extensive LVI Dx 6/8/2015, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 2/9 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Dx 7/29/2015, DCIS, Left, <1cm, Stage 0, Grade 2, ER+/PR+ Surgery 7/29/2015 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Underarm/Axillary Surgery 9/4/2015 Mastectomy: Left; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy 10/13/2015 Arimidex (anastrozole) Radiation Therapy 10/20/2015 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 4/22/2016 Aromasin (exemestane) Surgery 7/22/2016 Prophylactic mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Surgery 3/21/2017 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant
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Jul 24, 2018 11:44AM octogirl wrote:

yay for nothing to worry about Mollie! and yeah, I know, friends have been teasing me..though it has been a year... :-)

Tomorrow is my 3-D mammogram. At 7:30 in the am! In a town 50 miles away!! It was the only time that they had available given my crazy move schedule and I wanted it done before my MO apt week after next...sigh. trying to keep my mind off of it.

Honey is adorable!!!

Hugs and cheers to all;

Octogirl

Dx 6/18/2015, IDC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/16/2015 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Chemotherapy 9/9/2015 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Radiation Therapy 12/15/2015 Hormonal Therapy 1/15/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 4/8/2016 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 24, 2018 12:55PM Cubbie2015 wrote:

Yay for good results, Molly!

Sandy, glad to hear you have an opposable thumb again. You didn't poke yourself in the roof of the mouth with something, did you? That bump I had on the roof of my mouth after I poked myself with a tortilla chip was like that, and the dentist described it as "boggy". It finally did go down completely.

Lucy, the toy is almost as big as Honey!

Octo, in your pocket for your mammogram!

I saw my MO today, and everything looks fine. Ophthalmologist appointment was fine, too. Now I just have the annual GYN in early August to still get through.

1.8mm micromet in sentinel node; BRCA negative; chose bmx due to family history; age 43 at diagnosis; Oncotype 15 Dx 9/4/2015, IDC, Left, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (FISH) Surgery 10/8/2015 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left, Right Radiation Therapy 12/17/2015 Whole-breast: Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 1/12/2016 Zoladex (goserelin) Hormonal Therapy 6/29/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole)
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Jul 24, 2018 04:10PM ChiSandy wrote:

Cubbie, it could very well have been a tortilla-chip or airline-pretzel incident. (Or a hard piece of pizza crust after having first burned the spot with molten cheese on Thurs. night--but dang, it was good pizza).

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 25, 2018 09:25AM proudtospin wrote:

Sandy, dang but i always seem to burn the roof of my mouth on pizza!

Crazy weather, they keep saying rain but this scattered shower business is not helping my contractor and window replacement, sigh, delay delay

iris Dx 6/2008, DCIS, Stage 0, ER+ Dx 2/2017, Left, Stage IV, metastasized to bone/liver, Grade 3, 1/1 nodes, ER+, HER2+
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Jul 25, 2018 01:38PM Lucy55 wrote:

Octo ..in your pocket for your mammogram !!!

Iris ...hope the Sun comes out and your window can be replaced soon !!!

Cubbie ..glad to hear your doctor visits went well

I cooked a ham , cheese and tomato toastie for lunch yesterday ...burnt the roof of my mouth with the hot melted cheese too ..!!!!

Hubby has a bad cold ...you know , The Man Flu ...ugh ..he's not coping at all well with being sick ..now I'm just waiting to get it :-(


Dx 8/27/2014, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2014
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Jul 25, 2018 05:50PM - edited Jul 25, 2018 05:52PM by octogirl

wish it would rain here! We sooo need it with the hot weather and the fires. The closest one to me, the Ferguson fire, is really playing havoc: visitors to Yosemite Valley were evacuated, etc., but isn't really having much of an impact on air quality here in the Central Valley, thanks to the wind direction. Keeping the firefighters in my thoughts....

Well mammogram itself went fine. However, for some reason, they had me scheduled at 7:30 am, and the clinic is an hour's drive away! I think I did that because it was so hard to find a date that worked before my MO apt, as I wanted him to review results also....so argghhh...I was up at five, out the door a bit after six...then of course, I was done by 8 am, and the radiologist wasn't in yet to review it. So, I get a card in the mail in the few days (I hope). In the past they've been able to tell me results right then and there. They offered to do that this time if I was willing to sit around and wait an hour till the doc got in...Ummm no. I will try not to go crazy till I hear back.

So, I indulged in my favorite guilty pleasure (McDonalds #1 breakfast, with an unsweetened latte, the only thing I ever order there), and then drove home, rested and then dealt with getting moving quotes most of the day.

Today is hubby's birthday so I am making his favorite dinner (lamb chops marinated in garlic, rosemary and red wine and then grilled, roasted potatoes, brussel sprouts, chocolate cake, and raspberries. Served with a nice California red, of course). They had a little retirement party/birthday party at work today, and some friends are giving him a surprise retirement dinner tomorrow...I just have to figure out how to get him to the restaurant without him getting suspicious: which won't be easy since a.) he doesn't usually like to go out to dinner on a work night and b.) he isn't overly fond of the restaurant they chose (but of course I'd never tell them that since they are hosting..) So shhhhh.

Hugs to all!

Octogirl

Dx 6/18/2015, IDC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/16/2015 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Chemotherapy 9/9/2015 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Radiation Therapy 12/15/2015 Hormonal Therapy 1/15/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 4/8/2016 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 26, 2018 12:49PM - edited Jul 26, 2018 03:36PM by Lucy55

Octo ...A big Happy Birthday to your Hubby 🎉🎊🍰🎈..I hope he enjoys his special birthday dinner ...also hope you can get him off to his suprise farewell without him knowing...!!!..and you hoping you get great results from the mammogram !


Dx 8/27/2014, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2014
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Jul 26, 2018 09:54PM sweetp6217 wrote:

Proudtospin: Poodles don't have fur, they have hair. In any case poodles and a few other breeds are (for the most part) allergy friendly. My dear Mother was allergic to dogs, but when we got a poodle, she couldn't be separated from her.

Dx 7/7/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, HER2+ (FISH) Targeted Therapy 7/27/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 7/27/2017 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 1/4/2018 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel, Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 2/21/2018 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes Hormonal Therapy 4/14/2018 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 27, 2018 10:21AM M0mmyof2 wrote:

Had the CT Scan yesterday and got the results back last night. Spot where the cancer had showed up last year is gone and the spots on my lungs are stable and small.

If you value your freedom, thank a servicemember both serving and retired!
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Jul 27, 2018 03:55PM Lucy55 wrote:

Mommy ..yay for great results !!

Dx 8/27/2014, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2014
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Jul 28, 2018 02:52AM M0mmyof2 wrote:

thanks Lucy

If you value your freedom, thank a servicemember both serving and retired!
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Jul 28, 2018 01:11PM ChiSandy wrote:

Congrats!

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 28, 2018 02:13PM octogirl wrote:

Yay, M0mmy..., congrats!

Just got my mammo results: all clear, so yay for that too!

Octogirl

Dx 6/18/2015, IDC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 7/16/2015 Lumpectomy: Right; Lymph node removal: Sentinel Chemotherapy 9/9/2015 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide), Taxotere (docetaxel) Radiation Therapy 12/15/2015 Hormonal Therapy 1/15/2016 Arimidex (anastrozole) Hormonal Therapy 4/8/2016 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 28, 2018 06:04PM sweetp6217 wrote:

Congratulations MOmmyof2 & octogirl!

Mine was negative too this month.

Dx 7/7/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, HER2+ (FISH) Targeted Therapy 7/27/2017 Herceptin (trastuzumab) Chemotherapy 7/27/2017 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 1/4/2018 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Sentinel, Underarm/Axillary Radiation Therapy 2/21/2018 Whole-breast: Breast, Lymph nodes Hormonal Therapy 4/14/2018 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 28, 2018 08:23PM ChiSandy wrote:

Fantastic, you three!

Diagnosed at 64 on routine annual mammo, no lump. OncotypeDX 16. I cried because I had no shoes...but then again, I won’t get blisters.... Dx 9/9/2015, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- (IHC) Surgery 9/23/2015 Lumpectomy: Right Radiation Therapy 11/2/2015 3DCRT: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/31/2015 Femara (letrozole)
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Jul 29, 2018 12:19PM Lucy55 wrote:

Octo and Sweetp...wonderful news !!!!

Dx 8/27/2014, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 9/15/2014
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Jul 29, 2018 06:31PM TaRenee wrote:

Congrats on good news!!!!

Dx 7/29/2017, IDC, Left, 2cm, Stage IIA, Grade 1, 0/4 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 9/14/2017 Lymph node removal: Sentinel; Mastectomy: Left; Prophylactic mastectomy: Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Hormonal Therapy 9/25/2017 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Surgery 3/29/2018 Reconstruction (left): Silicone implant; Reconstruction (right): Silicone implant

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