Topic: Single life after a mastectomy

Forum: Singles With Breast Cancer — Singles with breast cancer who want to connect.

Posted on: Apr 29, 2011 11:32PM

Posted on: Apr 29, 2011 11:32PM

txkari wrote:

Hello --

I'm a 47 year old single, who was diagnosed with DCIS grade 3 in early March. The affected area is quite large ... 15 cm in one direction. I have had two partial mastectomies and they still don't have clear margins, so I will be getting a full mastectomy on the left side in a few weeks.

I guess I took the Dr's assurances that I would be OK, a little too much to heart. I was ready for a little surgery and radiation. I wasn't ready to be told I needed a full mastectomy. The reality of it hit me a couple of nights ago.

I haven't met with the plastic surgeon yet, so I'm not sure what my reconstruction plan is yet. My questions are ... how did you prepare yourself to see your body after the surgery? I'm rather large breasted (DD) so the difference is going to be pretty dramatic. Have you found that men can look past the changes in your body? Do they understand? I just want to know if I need to resign myself to being alone. Is there love after a mastectomy/reconstruction?

Thanks

Dx 3/4/2011, DCIS, 6cm+, Stage 0, Grade 3, 0/0 nodes
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Oct 3, 2014 12:16AM milkyway2 wrote:

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Oct 3, 2014 03:19PM - edited Oct 3, 2014 03:19PM by jazzygirl

BB- if you have an ACA policy, you can sign up again in November to get a different policy. Anyone can re-enroll again this fall and choose different coverage that includes the docs you want, just like you get to do in a FT job. I may look again this fall depending on what happens with my policy (no sooner did I sign up this year when I got a notice from BCBC they were upping the premiums). I have liked some things about this policy, but not others. If they dropped my doctors, I would go find another policy that would have them even if it is with a different carrier. 

When does your policy expire? Can you get the BRAVA done before those changes go into effect? I think you were planning to do it end of the year. I would move it up if you can?

Milky- that is a very awesome reminder.

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lumpectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 3, 2014 11:16PM grayeyes wrote:

Sorry to hear this latest news, BB.  Sometimes it seems that, for every step forward, we fall back a step.  But the BRAVA patients have been complaining about that procedure.  The newer idea - fat grafting around a TE, with the TE reduced little by little and, I guess, eventually removed altogether (?) - sounds promising, though.  But I don't know if the procedure is available here in the U.S. yet.

Jazzy - I really need a haircut.  LOL.  I just can't afford one right now.  And now my scalp has been ticklish with hair strands falling out.  Also, my knees have been bothering me.  I tend to brush off these things, but now I'm thinking the knee issue could be another SE.  I called my oncologist's office today, and now I'm going to try letrizole (Femara?).  It might have the same side effects, but maybe it won't.  I guess it's worth a try.

Milky - Great words of wisdom.  :-)

Juneping - Good to see you back again.

2011: Left MX w/TE (Ki67: 60%) AC x 4, Taxol x 12, Radiation, Tamoxifen, BRCA2+ Dec. 2012: Right prophylactic MX w/TE, ooph; June 2013: Final exchange; Nov. 2013: Fat grafting; 2014: Arimidex; 2015: Femara REST IN PEACE, MELANIE Dx 11/23/2010, IDC, 1cm, Stage IIA, Grade 3, 2/22 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Oct 4, 2014 05:55AM jazzygirl wrote:

Life- I get various pains in joints that move around. Ankle, knee, feet, elbows. I know it is from the AIs, and sometimes if any particular joint does not feel good, I wear a brace. Yesterday, my left knee was bothering me but now that is gone. Last week it was my left ankle. 

Glad you are taking a different med to see if it is better. My MO says many people don't last on arimidex and have to change. 

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lumpectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 4, 2014 01:52PM Enerva wrote:

10 minutes to open the door for my open house lol

Well I am beside the house now sitting in my car, house is empty which is easy for showing lol

I agree with you Jazz I have a few friends who do the colon cleansing and believe everybody should do it lol

I ll post when I get home ;) wish me luck, it's cold and I am not sure how this is going to turn out

Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Dx 12/13/2017, LCIS, 6cm+, Grade 1, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 12/21/2017 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Oct 4, 2014 03:34PM jazzygirl wrote:

Enerva- good luck with the open house. Let us know how many people come today. I hope you get some folks who are interested in making an offer. How fun it will be when you sell your first property! 

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lumpectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 4, 2014 03:43PM jazzygirl wrote:

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lumpectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)
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Oct 5, 2014 09:19PM Enerva wrote:

hi everybody, well I had a busy weekend and now I am anxious about tmw, to be honest I have to put on a fake smile and present back to work with people I wish I never had to see again ;( but I did not win the lotto so nothing I can do about it just need to be brave and hide how I feel inside, hope for the hours to go fast and hope so they don't treat me the way they did before. I will try to just get by and survive the week. I feel if I survive a week then I will survive the next one and so forth. The open house went slow not many people showed up. A few noisy neighbours saying it is over priced and well I kind of agree, didn't tell them so off course but in my mind I agreed lol there was a young couple who seemed interested and I sent them an email today just thanking them for attending and also gave then some more details about the area. Anyway yesterday morning I woke up with a sore throat so I went to the walking clinic around noon doctor gave me antibiotics for 7 days, I have a throat infection. I have to tell you, I don't know if I told you before but this is scary now ever since I had chemo my immune system is so frágil I mean I get a sore throat and within 24 hours it becomes an infection :( I am worry. Not sure if I told you before I travel to vzla to help my family I had 3 throat infections one after another and wile I was there I also got sick now that winter is approaching I am getting it again. Anyway I was glad the doctor saw the infection and prescribed me the antibiotics but at the same time I wonder why I am not able to make my immune system stronger? I even bought supplement and what ever I read it helps but still I can tell I am not succeeding. Ok so tmw I will post to tell you how my day back in the office goes. ;) not looking forward to it :( 

Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Dx 12/13/2017, LCIS, 6cm+, Grade 1, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 12/21/2017 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Oct 5, 2014 09:36PM Enerva wrote:

forgot to share a few pictures 

Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Dx 12/13/2017, LCIS, 6cm+, Grade 1, 1/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Hormonal Therapy 12/21/2017 Zoladex (goserelin)
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Oct 5, 2014 10:18PM jazzygirl wrote:

Enerva- well you are through your first open house and it sounds like it went okay. Maybe the young couple will follow up and be interested in more, you never know! The neighbors can have their opinions too. 

Sorry about your sore throat. I did not have chemo as you know, but did read both chemo and rads can reduce your immunity short and longer term. One thing that might help is to start taking Vitamin C every day. My doctors told me I should take it for healing and immunity during treatment and good for boosting your immunity for the long term. I take 1000 mg extra beyond my multiple vit and have only had one cold since my treatment. Might be worth trying? Hope you feel better.

And good luck tomorrow. You and I have had parallel experiences in life, and tomorrow I am walking back into my old work scene too, that like you, I was not wanting to do, but got something with them for a few months while I am waiting for something better to manifest. I decided that this time, I am keeping it 100% professional. I can work there but have learned I really just cannot be friends with people hat work there (fellow consultants yes, but not the worker bees). I have less tolerance for the BS that goes with other people after having cancer and really had to put up a lot of boundaries last time, and will do more this time too. You can use this to get money going and then look for something better too.

Wishing everyone here a good week!

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Right): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lymph node removal; Lymph node removal (Left): Sentinel Surgery 11/15/2012 Lumpectomy; Lumpectomy (Left); Lumpectomy (Right) Radiation Therapy 1/7/2013 Breast Radiation Therapy 2/25/2013 Breast Hormonal Therapy 3/21/2013 Arimidex (anastrozole), Aromasin (exemestane)

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