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All TopicsForum: Singles With Breast Cancer → Topic: Single life after a mastectomy

Topic: Single life after a mastectomy

Forum: Singles With Breast Cancer —

Singles with breast cancer who want to connect.

Posted on: Apr 29, 2011 11:32PM

txkari wrote:

Hello --

I'm a 47 year old single, who was diagnosed with DCIS grade 3 in early March. The affected area is quite large ... 15 cm in one direction. I have had two partial mastectomies and they still don't have clear margins, so I will be getting a full mastectomy on the left side in a few weeks.

I guess I took the Dr's assurances that I would be OK, a little too much to heart. I was ready for a little surgery and radiation. I wasn't ready to be told I needed a full mastectomy. The reality of it hit me a couple of nights ago.

I haven't met with the plastic surgeon yet, so I'm not sure what my reconstruction plan is yet. My questions are ... how did you prepare yourself to see your body after the surgery? I'm rather large breasted (DD) so the difference is going to be pretty dramatic. Have you found that men can look past the changes in your body? Do they understand? I just want to know if I need to resign myself to being alone. Is there love after a mastectomy/reconstruction?

Thanks

Dx 3/4/2011, DCIS, 6cm+, Stage 0, Grade 3, 0/0 nodes
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Jan 16, 2018 02:40PM Enerva wrote:

jazz I love it and thanks a lot for thinking of me.

Well my sister is worse now in a coma and family refused the machines so is a matter of time now ; (

I am so sorry, sad, upset no words to describe how I feel.

I have my appointment on Thursday to get that stupid injection which Hurst so muchSickTired

I am tired already

My STD was extended till Feb 20th

I am just in a bit of a mess mentally not in a good place.

I started to crochet and it is helping me distract my mind I don't know what would I do if I didn't have any hobbies? It really helps me.

So far so good on the MMS.

I ll keep u all posted

Love you girls

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 16, 2018 03:13PM - edited Jan 16, 2018 04:38PM by Jazzygirl

E- I am so sorry about your sister. Sending you much love friendHeart

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 16, 2018 03:59PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, I have no words. :(

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Jan 16, 2018 05:58PM juneping wrote:

E - i am sorry about your sister....and take all the time you need. i am glad that you don't have to go to work....

juneping.wordpress.com/ Dx 11/15/2013, DCIS Dx 11/15/2013, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/35 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 17, 2018 08:06AM Jazzygirl wrote:

Someone at my yoga retreat this weekend was talking about this app that is a great resource for daily meditations. I wanted to share it for E, but thought others here could be interested.

https://www.headspace.com/headspace-meditation-app


Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 17, 2018 11:55AM Jazzygirl wrote:

Also something I like. Going to print out and put on my fridge. I am plagued by insomnia most of the time

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 18, 2018 07:07PM Enerva wrote:

hi friends

Ok so I had a long day.

Went to do my blood test then I went to see the oncologist. I told him about an urine infeccion I started yesterday and also some wierd pain on my jaw .ir started today around 10am and now I can hardly open my mouth. He says to take Tylenol and then he said yo wait that he wanted to review my blood test. Then he comes and gives me a prescription for a blood test and also tells me he is concerned about my right kidney and that I should get an ultrasound cuz I may need to see a neurologist to invert a Carteter in it . I was like what? When where what?

So ibwent to the pharmacy and then went to 3rd floor to do an ultrasound. The lady started asking me questions and I told her what happened with my CT scan back in Dec 18th

The she said humm I don't see any blockage

I said really ? Well my oncologist is concerned

Then she said wait here let me review this with the dr here .

Then she came back and said ok all ok I ll send the report you can go now.

I then went to the pharmacy again picked up the antibiotics and I left

But I now got the results and actually they saw a small improvement So what is going on?

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 18, 2018 09:30PM juneping wrote:

E,

stress is a huge factor affects our body/health....i think may be you are feeling bit less stressed out (not dealing w crazy coworkers??) i am glad there's some improvement. you must be doing something right....

juneping.wordpress.com/ Dx 11/15/2013, DCIS Dx 11/15/2013, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/35 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 18, 2018 11:37PM - edited Jan 20, 2018 01:15AM by Jazzygirl

E- Did you get your shot today and are you feeling okay?

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 19, 2018 04:03PM Enerva wrote:

well I have an appointment with a urologist next week. So much for my happiness SickTired

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 19, 2018 11:32PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

Why the appointment E? Did the Dr call to explain why? Well I think it is a good idea to get checked out and get some answers. Do you feel any better yet being on antibiotics?


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Jan 20, 2018 10:49AM - edited Jan 20, 2018 10:51AM by Enerva

hi no broken no call.

The way I see it .

He asked his nurse to book the appointment in front of me when I was getting the injection. He also told her to take a pee test before I went to the pharmacy to get the prescription. Which I was not to start until urine test results were up.

So what I think is this :

When he saw the results for the ultrasound his secretary /or and nurse had already faxed the referral for the appointment. Plus when I saw the result for the urine I already had been gone.

So I am ok I will go to the appointment for the specialist to explain a frew questos to me. But he will have both the CT scan and yeterday ultrasound which means he will have to explain how the kidney got better ? And if the kidney got better why is there a need to insert anything?

I am not going to be a ginne pig for them. I am my own ginne pig now and the natural stuff I am taking is what clear my kidney I have no doubt on that.

Is all ok I just had a breakdown yesterday when I read the appointment and what they plan on doing but now I am ok I analize the situation and I think the oncologist just want to prevent a bigger problem cuz he had no idea my kidney had improvement by this time it should have been in big trouble of course cuz instead of helping it back in Dec 18 when it was having an issue they did nothing but send me away with hormone blokers now he is in a rush but I already helped myself with the MMS natural solution.

I don't mean to overwhelm you girls just trying so you know where all stands


No news yet from sister she continues to hardly breath and in a deep sleep everybody just waits

Cremation arrangements are done and we just wait .

My appointment is on next Wednesday I ll keep you all posted

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 21, 2018 10:36AM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, you never have to worry about overwhelming us. We are always here for you to share.

E, is your sister home now?


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Jan 21, 2018 11:07AM Jazzygirl wrote:

E- thinking of you friend and hope you can get some good answers on the kidney function issue and what they feel is the root cause?

Sending much love about your sister. I hope she is home and comfortable and surrounded by family Heart

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 21, 2018 03:41PM Enerva wrote:

hi girls

No she is still in the hospital. The doctors said there is nothing else to do but my siblings fear that if there is then at home they won't have the iv or anything to act. You see it is very hard for them to acept this so all they can do is pray and wait right there by the waiting area. They are allow a few minutes at the time to see her then back outside. Is such a big mess is so sad.

It is just a matter of time now

Jazz the root couse as per why my kidney was in trouble back in December was due to the mass in my pelvic area was pushing and blocking a tube which comes from the kidney that is what they told me in December but they didn't do anything about it . So now the oncologist wants to act cuz he think by now my kidney can explode due to the month that went by but some how I manage to make it improve and I will have to see what this specialist thinks.

Unless my kidney shows problems I won't allow them to insert anything in it. Let's wait for Wednesday and see . I want to know what is this stem hey want to insert. What is the risk for how long also how easy is it to reverse and what are the chances of infection etc. There is no way I ll do it unless my kidney really needs it. I ll keep u all posted I wish I could discuss all with my surgeon but I don't see her till Feb 14th ; (

Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 21, 2018 04:01PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, my mom has struggled with urology issues for some time now. I too always worry about her bladder bursting. Is this tube they are talking about a catheter? I don't mean to be snarkey but if this mass is causing pain and now affecting your kidneys then why the heck not remove it? I assume there is a reason but in my simple but logical head that seems like the best solution, no?

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Jan 21, 2018 04:06PM NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, as to your sis, this is likely no comfort to you but as an outsider I am glad she is no longer in pain and fearful. Oh E,....😢

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Jan 21, 2018 04:19PM juneping wrote:

E - i hope your kidney condition is on the way to recovery.

i am sad about your sister....at this time i'd just do whatever make her comfortable.

juneping.wordpress.com/ Dx 11/15/2013, DCIS Dx 11/15/2013, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/35 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 21, 2018 09:39PM Jazzygirl wrote:

E- okay got it. I agree here about why they won't remove the mass when it is causing other problems. Get more information and if the surgeon's apt is a couple weeks later, maybe the doctor can wait until you talk to her first. That is my hope for you.

The hospital will ensure she remains comfortable, although hard to be there and for folks to visit. Sending you hugs. This is so sad friend.

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 22, 2018 07:52PM Enerva wrote:

hi hi

Small good news today

Sister woke up from coma .

Still in critical condition but at least she woke up. No able to talk much but she seems she knows who she is and seems to be able to blink and smile and we'll is very small but we are happy.

Yes we fear of the future for her by we are taking a day at the time . Hopping she survives yet another night


Dx 8/27/2012, ILC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 3, 1/2 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Chemotherapy 10/18/2012 Cytoxan (cyclophosphamide) Chemotherapy 12/21/2012 Taxotere (docetaxel) Surgery 3/25/2013 Mastectomy: Left, Right; Reconstruction (left): Tissue expander placement; Reconstruction (right): Tissue expander placement Radiation Therapy 5/31/2013 Breast, Lymph nodes Surgery 12/24/2013 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right) Surgery 8/27/2014 Reconstruction (left); Reconstruction (right)
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Jan 22, 2018 08:41PM juneping wrote:

E - that's very nice.

juneping.wordpress.com/ Dx 11/15/2013, DCIS Dx 11/15/2013, IDC, 6cm+, Stage IIIA, Grade 2, 2/35 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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Jan 22, 2018 10:32PM Jazzygirl wrote:

I hope she continues to improve E. Miracles do happen. This is amazing!

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-
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14 hours ago NotBrokenJustBent wrote:

E, be cautiously optimist but I agree this is a godsend. Perhaps she is stronger than anyone realized.

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13 hours ago Jazzygirl wrote:

E- how are things today? Any news on your accounting test results from 10 days ago? Hope all is continuing to get better for you.

Dx 9/14/2012, DCIS, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Dx 9/14/2012, IDC, <1cm, Stage IA, Grade 1, 0/1 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-

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