Topic: Anyone else feel insecure after everything was done??

Forum: Singles With Breast Cancer — Singles with breast cancer who want to connect.

Posted on: Sep 24, 2018 05:31PM

Posted on: Sep 24, 2018 05:31PM

KayS1084 wrote:

Since I completed my treatments a year ago I haven't felt like myself. I just built up the courage to tell people I had cancer. I wanted to avoid the pity. Now I am struggling to find me again. I spoke to a few people during the whole process but kept most fears to myself. I tried to keep it together for my family and close friends. Now I've lost my strength and courage. I feel like I am a shell. I'm afraid of getting close to people, letting people know what happened that my possibility to have kids has gone down significantly. I look at my scar and get angry, I get sad, I ask why. Will I ever be ok when I look at it. Am I being to sensitive or hard on myself.Sad


Thank you

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Jun 29, 2019 05:54PM jo6359 wrote:

I believe it's especially difficult for the younger people who have breast cancer. Some people share all aspects of their life with family members and Friends. I am not one of those people. I tend to be very private. I Share my cancer diagnosis and treatment with a few close people. There aren't many support groups for women in their thirties or early forties. Part of the reason, thank goodness there isn't a high percentage of women with breast cancer in their thirties and early forties. I find the Susan Komen Foundation to be an excellent resource. They will hook you up with a mentor in your age group with a similar diagnosis. American Cancer Society might be beneficial also.

Dx 1/29/2018, IDC, Right, 2cm, Stage IIB, Grade 2, 1/18 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2+, Dx 1/29/2018, DCIS, Right, Stage 0 Targeted Therapy 2/15/2018 Perjeta (pertuzumab) Chemotherapy 2/15/2018 Carboplatin (Paraplatin), Taxotere (docetaxel) Targeted Therapy 2/15/2018 Herceptin (trastuzumab)
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Jun 30, 2019 05:37AM salamandra wrote:

Hey Kays24,

One thing you could do is contact Sharsharet - https://sharsheret.org/who-we-are/contact-us/

Their social workers are *really* nice and helpful. They will connect you with one, and then you can speak to her about what resources she knows of and what would be helpful to you. If you tell her where you are located and that you're interested in speaking with young women in a similar situation, she will either know a group or find one for you, or find individuals to connect you with. They can also just listen and try to help figure out ideas, or just listen and support. It is a Jewish organization but they serve everybody.

I'm almost 40. I was single for 3 years before my diagnosis and single now. I want to date in theory but in practice I'm just so goddamned tired. I've gained weight, my tamoxifen exhausts me, and I'm past the optimal shelf life for online dating. I have extremely limited patience for the whole dating thing. At this point, if my Prince Charming doesn't fall from the sky into my lap, with a clear label, I think I'm going to be single for the indefinite future.

But one thing I know. I am capable of love and worthy of love. And so are you. All kinds of love. There are many things we can't control, and outcomes often don't turn out how we'd like. But none of that means you are not precious, desirable, and lovable.


Dx at 39. 1.8cm. Oncotype 9. Dx 9/19/2018, IDC, Right, 1cm, Stage IA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2- Surgery 10/17/2018 Lumpectomy; Lymph node removal Hormonal Therapy 11/1/2018 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Radiation Therapy 12/2/2018 Whole breast: Breast Hormonal Therapy 12/18/2019 Fareston (toremifene)
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Jun 30, 2019 11:36AM Spoonie77 wrote:

Here Here! I'm with you Salamandra -- my Prince Charming needs a label and to fall out of the sky indeed! Happy

"Spoonie" who entered BC World @ 41. DXd w/MS & Thyroid Cancer @42. Treatment: LX/SLNB/RADs. Plan A: 5mg Tamox = 0 QOL. Plan B: OS/AI = Rare allergy to OS meds. Plan C: Only option left,  Diet & Exercise. PS: Not a dr, just a Googler. Dx 7/20/2018, IDC, Left, 3cm, Stage IIA, Grade 2, 0/3 nodes, ER+/PR+, HER2-, Surgery 8/29/2018 Lumpectomy: Left; Lymph node removal: Left, Sentinel Dx 8/30/2018, DCIS, Left, 1cm, Stage 0, Grade 2 Radiation Therapy 9/30/2018 Whole breast: Breast, Lymph nodes, Chest wall Hormonal Therapy 3/29/2019 Tamoxifen pills (Nolvadex, Apo-Tamox, Tamofen, Tamone) Hormonal Therapy 7/1/2019 Zoladex (goserelin)

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