Illinois ladies facing bc
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Hi Ladies,
Did any of you have a hard time with accepting your mastectomy? I am so down about the body image change even with the reconstruction.Bilateral mastectomy 12/29/09. I get the implants Oct. 1st and the areola and nipple part in Dec. I hate the loss of sensation and just feel embarrassed because I lost my breasts. I know I shouldn't but I do. Any suggestions?
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Determined. Everyone is different. I am almost 4 weeks out with expanders that look IMO a bit strange. Not much sensation at all. Doesn't bother me that I don't have my original boobs.
I suggest you talk to a counsel about this. It's not unusual to be upset about this. Best to get professional help instead of suffering. This is treatable/curable.
I think I'm one of the anomalies… or maybe it's because my boobs were so small that it's not a big change for me. They tell me I'm going to be upset about losing the hair on my head. I think I'm prepared for that. But if I should lose my eyebrows I think I will find that more upsetting. Like I said everyone is different.
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Welcome Dawn...Hope you're having a better day!
Annette - OMGoodness - how scary! I'm so happy to read she's doing well. Poor little thing!
Determined - I'm sorry you're struggling. I had bilats too. Fortunately for me, I was "okay" with it (I wasn't a candidate for recon). I still (slightly) cringe when I see myself in the mirror, but I try to justify it by reminding myself that it was a life saving procedure. I truly think, in time, you will find peace. Best wishes to you.
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HI TO EVERYONE! I have had a very busy week! Whew...
Can't wait to see you all tomorrow morning! BRIGHT AND EARLY! Team members: check your e-mail...I sent important info to each of you.
It is REALLY windy here...yikes...I hope we don't get more downed trees.
Looking forward to seeing you girls on the 8th!
Have a great day...make the most of it.
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LauraGTO I love your smile your picture radiates kindness
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Determined --- Laura and lago are right. I think it would be a big help if you talked to a professional to gain some perspective on this loss for you. It is not everyday that we must give up a part of our bodies in order to live. Hard to see it now ---- but we are not our body or our body parts -- still losing something that is so intimate to us would be difficult. The beautiful energy and spirit that is you has no need of specific parts --- it can stand alone and is the loving, funny, adorable, helpful, caring, giving, entity that might be missed by so many if you had not been strong enough to do what needed to be done. Breasts are wonderful indeed, but I would not die for them. There are ways to learn to go on without them. I hope you will find a counselor who can get you over this hump so you are once again not only healthy but happy to be alive and not aware of a lack but much more in tune with what you gained that you can continue to share with everyone.
Healing hugs,
Jackie
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Well said, Jackie! I am just over 5 months out from my bilat and recon. Finally used to these tight expanders but I am looking forward to swapping them out for something softer next spring. This is like walking around in a steel cage bra. Shoot, I rarely even bother with a bra. Fortunately, my expanders are very even so I can get away with it most of the time.
Great news about Grace. It always breaks my heart to see young children have to deal with such illness. She was a brave little girl!
Everyone have a great weekend... I actually am happy to see the cooler weather again. Good luck to all the walkers tomorrow. I sure hope that I can join you next year.
Joan
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Onward....good job and know you are getting there one tx at a time. There are good and bad days and always here to listen@!!
Hugs,
Donna
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Hi all!
Yes, Rita, I worked today. The only time I get up early is on days I work as school starts at 7:45! I usually sleep in, but I have to admit that I love the mornings in Fall....so dark and cool. Such a great time to just enjoy the peacefulness around me.
Regarding the discussion on body image, I have to say I have gotten used to me. I have a huge scar (five inches and maybe some) and no nipple and of course, no feeling there. Naked, my breast is shaped like a funny football. I was 58 at the time and just thought I could live with it and I have. But it does make a difference, and I do not wish to minimize anyone's feelings of loss. I thought it was so cool that someone here (maybe Lago????) took pictures of her breasts before they were changed. That is the perfect example on how losing them represents a loss in our lives! We take photos so we can go back in time. I honestly wish I had done that...taken a picture! Counseling could help if the right person is counseling you! I wish you well.
Good luck to the walkers tomorrow. I hope you have great weather. I know you will enjoy great fellowship!
Susan
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Just a quick drop in to wish Connie a belated Happy Birthday!
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onward - You did good! Hang in there. It's a journey, but it's do-able. Take each day at a time. Glad you got a port...some girls do not. Personally...it made life a lot easier for me. So again...hang in there...we're here 24/7!
Determined - Thanks so much for the compliment!
Joan - Ouchy - steel cage bra! YIKES...lol Hoping soft and mushy comes your way soon! And btw...NEXT YEAR...you can drive to my house (it's not "out of the way") and I'll drive us all to Grant Park. A long-range-mini-goal for both of us! Will you be able to join us on the 8th for lunch?
Mich101 - Glad you popped in! How are you doing? Think about you often!
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Hugs to all going through treatment, etc.
BUDDER - Where's Budder...c'mon Budder the kids are back in school - whatcha been up to?
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Oh no! It's 4:00am! I was sooooooooooooooooo afraid I'd oversleep for today's walk, that I woke up b/4 the alarm! Will be leaving @ 5:15 for the walk. Can't wait to see the girls! Walk the walk and talk the talk! lol Oh cripe...I'm not quite totally awake yet!
Have a great Saturday, girls!
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So glad I live in the city. I'm hopping in the shower in 5 minutes. See you in a couple of hours ;D
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how fun that you are meeting together and walking for us all!
Sadly, I never used to pay much attention to these walks.... but as so often happens, when it touches us personally, suddenly we take notice! I bought a cute zippered hoodie at Walmart the other day, that says Support the Cure - it's grey with pink accents - cute if you ask me
Anyway, I won't complain anymore about being up too early on this Saturday morning (because my son had to go to work) instead I will think of (and thank) you ladies for walking!
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Glad to know I can now find you when I want to... October 5 is round 2 of my A/C so I am hoping to come out and meet a few other warriors on the 8th.
Nana, I am praying for your grandchild.
Carolynlemont: bout time you came and thank you for changing your name.
Carolyn422: Who else met with us at Chili's? I cant find her address?
Onward
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HAPPY SATURDAY TO ALL. Laura and all the girls who are walking with the No Surrender Team.....thank you !!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes we do need to find a cure. Enjoy your day today. I will be there in spirit with all of you. Make sure you wear your comfy shoes. lol
Remember to be healthy...be happy...enjoy life. Have a wonderful Saturday.
BJ
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Morning all.....chilly out here on my deck, 46.9! Cloudy now with some rain maybe by this evening. Sunny tomorrow but this will def. be a jeans weekend.
Onward....looking forward to meeting you on the 8th! BJ is our social secretary and I think she mentioned in a phone call Pompeii at 12:30 (it's on Higgins, right by Woodfield) but that could have changed. So keep checking for a lunch update. I HATED my port, hurt going in, hurt sitting there for a year, hurt coming out and it still pulls and there is still a stitch in there which pokes me. BUT.....I am so glad I had one. Saved my veins for sure.
Annette...so glad about Grace! Wow. She had quite the time of it. Keep us updated as to her recovery, ok? Prayers still going out to her....
Derermined....I so agree with Jackie. I would not die for my breasts. They are just not that important to me....at all. But they are to you and you are having some issues with that. So....I agree too that maybe a counselor would be a good idea. Talking with the girls here about body image issues will also help. Once you are all done with recon perhaps you will begin to move past this hump. I had a lumpectomy and an excellent result so no problem for me but my issue was the hair. There was a point that I would rather have taken my chances and not done chemo/herceptin just so I could keep my hair. Talk about me being stupid. So you see....body image is important to all of us and you will eventually be ok. If you need help moving past, go and get it so you can get back to this wonderful life, so you don't miss a minute of it. Life is too short, honey. You can do this!
To all the girls walking today....thank you!
And if you guys are too pooped after all that exercise...I rented the cutest movie last night from redbox....."Letters to Juliet". I loved it and so did DH! Really a nice little movie and the scenery from Italy was beautiful.
Hope you all have a wonderful Saturday and WendyTY....hope you are ok and doing well!
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Determined....I just read my post and was going to edit it, but I figured I would just post again. If it sounded like I was minimizing your personal reactions to your mx I was not. For you, it is overwhelming and it is real. Very real. And I am so sorry that on top of everything you have to deal with this. But altho your breasts have changed, and so have you.....you can get to a place where this just won't matter anymore. It's the "getting there" that is so tough...and we ALL have had a hard time with the "getting there". Heck....I am still "getting there" some days...cannot believe that this happened to me. If you need some help to "get there", get some. If you need a support group, use us! Do whatever you need to do. Life is good and none of us should waste a minute of it, including me....who sometimes still gets weepy and sad that this is now my life and the worry and concern about my future will always be there now. So you see....we all GET IT. We really do......
Hugs, Determined! Have a wonderful day! Enjoy as this is the only 9/25/2010 you will EVER have so make it a fun, happy one......
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All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.
Henry Ellis0 -
Good morning.....I too, would like to thank all those walking for me today. I am working early and then going to a wedding. My little second cousin who was so young when we moved back home is now almost through college and getting married. Time really does fly --- even though some events in our life often make it feel like it is in slow motion.
Wendy is so right.....this moment, this minute, hour, day -- it will never come again. Each one that has gone past is all we ever had --- now often they take on twice the meaning for us. All I know for sure is that we are meant to be HAPPY, but this will not come without the HURDLES of life being presented. That is one of the things that keep you grounded like it or not --- so do know that whatever happens is ok. You will learn and grow and hopefully find a door that opens so you can make it better for yourself and those around you. As the saying goes....I think of this so often: God did not say it would be easy -- he said it would be worth it. I try to remember that when I struggle.
Thanks again to all those fabulous, caring No Surrender ladies and all the others that are walking too. Thanks again for all of you.
Hugs, Jackie
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Great quote, Jackie.
A big Thank you to Team No Surrender for walking for the cure. I am sorry that I just wasn't up to participating today. You are all so very special and so very appreciated
Navy
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Ladies, It looks like Grace will be home Monday. The first cultures came back as a staph infection which the antibiotics she is on will take care of. The last cultures will be back tomorrow. If no surprises she can go home. They took the last drain out of her forehead today. She is getting cranky about being in the hospital, so I guess she is getting better. They have not said yet when she will be allowed back to school. She lives in a small town and the school will be very good about helping her keep up with her class. She has already missed 8 days. I thank you all for your concern and prayers. Annette
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Ladies, It looks like Grace will be home Monday. The first cultures came back as a staph infection which the antibiotics she is on will take care of. The last cultures will be back tomorrow. If no surprises she can go home. They took the last drain out of her forehead today. She is getting cranky about being in the hospital, so I guess she is getting better. They have not said yet when she will be allowed back to school. She lives in a small town and the school will be very good about helping her keep up with her class. She has already missed 8 days. I thank you all for your concern and prayers. Annette
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Thanks to all the women who walked for a cure!
Onward - there was the lady with the screen name Adey on the BCO web site and there was another lady whose name I can't remember - must be chemo brain.
Take care!
Carolyn
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Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
- Joshua J. Marine0 -
Oh girls...thank you so much for THANKING us for walking! We held each and every one of you in our hearts today...every step of the way, we thought of you! The walk was AWESOME! The weather was perfect! You all have a special place in my heart! Thank you team members for your fund raising efforts! I truly appreciate your dedication!
(left to right - donna, lisamed, elfsong, me, Morgan, Shelby, Connie's dd Kelly, Tyler, my Mom - back row, my dh, Rena, Sydney, Connie, Connie's ds Kevin, Laura I.)
(left to right - donnadio, Lisa's friend, me, lisamed, elfsong)
(left to right - elfsong, me, connie, donna)
(dh and me)
(my nieces, Sydney and Shelby)
(my friend Laura and her kids, Morgan and Tyler)
(My FAB Mom - it's obvious who I get my spirit from)
(Connie...dang, I'm sorry...I didn't get a photo of you and your kids!)
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Thanks for posting the pictures. I think I remember seeing your dh! I don't remember seeing anyone else. Just don't know how I missed you guys… for some reason I was expecting a big group.
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Just a quick drive bye to thank each and everyone one of you wonderful, beautiful No Surrender team girls for walking for us. You all radiate beauty and happiness. Thank you all !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Laura thank you for sharing with us these great photos. You Rock Girl !!
Have a great Sunday everyone....Remember to be healthy...be happy ... enjoy life !!
Hugs to all,
BJ
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Lovely ladies dressed in pink shirts, supporting a cause that's so important to each of us! Thank you so much for walking the walk. Thanks so much for sharing the pictures. You're fantastic gals and you all look SO GOOD!
Everyone have a great Sunday!
Rita
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Thanks for posting the pictures Laura. They are awesome. It was a great day! Afterward, we walked all the way over to the Sears Tower. It was fun, but the line to get to the top was soooo long - waited about an hour.
Glad to hear that Grace is doing well. She has been in my thoughts.
Sorry we missed you lago!
Have a great day everyone.
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Thanks to all you great ladies on Team No Surrender who walked the walk on Saturday. And thanks to Laura for posting all the photos. Everyone looks so wonderful and full of energy. I was thinking of you all and wishing I would have been up to being there with you.
Let me know about time and place for lunch on Oct 8th. I am starting rads very soon and I am hoping to be able to work my schedule around it.
Yeh for Grace. Hope she gets to go home from the hospital real soon.
Joan
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