Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Welcome MoJim, I just turned 63 and had my lumpectomy in June. If you aren't on the Lumpectomy Forum I'd recommend following that one for awhile too, the ladies there had lots of good suggestions for me after surgery.

Teacher: congrats on passing your stress test!

Thanks going to the water tomorrow,  thanks

Ok, I got the picture/avatar in -- wow, I must be losing it.  That picture was smaller than I remember.  Maybe I need new glasses.  Sigh !!!  This old gray mare seems to be coming up a little bit short  lately. Oh well, that's ok.  I'll be x-ing  this avatar out in a day or two and find one of my GIANT animal pictures or something.

Maureen, when you find the forums you'd like to read and post in for a short or long time -- I put them all in a favorites list ( to do that you just go up to the top of each page -- like the very top of the one you are reading in -- and click on the box there that says to save in favorites or something like that -- and every time you open Breast Cancer Org. Discussion Group, you will see a list of your favorites and how many of them have been posted too since the last time you came. 

Also at the left top of this page is a box with all the parts pretty much of BC. Org and you can use it to jump around and find places that might interest you.  You can also put something in your favorites ( to make sure you can easily and quickly get back ) and if you find in a day or two, it may not be something you'd care to keep going too....you can just go to it and hit the part that says you can remove it  from your favorite topics.  I seldom if ever have to look for Breast Cancer. Org.  Everything I use ( which is a fairly small list ) always opens right up to the list of favorites. 

On the far left of my computer is a big list of favorites that lists numerous places all over the Internet and BC.Org is one of them -- and that is my link to go directly into MY FAVORITES on the BC. Org.  Just a little playing around and you will have it down pat.

See you all later.

Jackie

Hi MoJim-

First off, we wanted to welcome you to Breastcancer.org. We're so glad you've joined our community, and hope you find it to be a place of support in your journey.

You can find our Lumpectomy forum here. Like Jackie said, you can add that forum to your favorites so it's easy to locate the next time you log on.

Let us know if there's anything we can help you with, that's what we're here for!

The Mods

Oh yes! It's a MoJim! I forgot! Welcome here gal! Now Jackie says we "cut-up"..... Well, that's kind of an understatement, but Cammi and I have this "thing" where-as we tease each other un-mercifully.

I'm always trying to act like her Mom, and straighten her out... well, her spelling anyway... but just don't pay no attention... it is what it is.... All that schoolin' I did for her... and it just went out the door. But I love her, because someone has to.

Jackie, you've been here since 2007? I had forgotten that! I thought I had been here awhile.... since 2009.... You beat me kid! Hah!

And Carole! A little longer than me!

Hah Sandra! As soon as we loved Jackie's new avatar, she CHANGED it! She keeps us on our toes... don't get toooo used to this one, because she is doing this to trick us.... She wants us to think she is someone new. Watch! NOW she will also change her name..... to like Ruby or Sarah or something!

Sandra!!!! OMD.... !!! That's Oh My Dog, instead of OMG! We like that better.... You can't find your glasses? Okay, do this.... Look on Google Images, for this photo.... It says "St. Anthony, St. Anthony, please take a look around. Something has been lost and cannot be found." And print it off, and set it someplace conspicuous, and HE will help you find them!

It took awhile, but it worked...! Also found my cute little polyester PJ bottoms, with the lace. THEY were in DH's underwear drawer! Can you imagine??? I must have done it, putting away his stuff!

It's been so cold here, that I've been cleaning and organizing EVERYthing, besides looking for my watch! So I found them too!

Now I'm not Catholic, but St. Anthony works for everybody, so just try it.

Morning Teacher! And yes MoJim, we're glad you found us too! I think I found out my stage and grade after the biopsy? Or was it after the "final pathology report"? Then you can post it here... Keep all of your records, and just write everything down.... You are probably used to that with your DH? What cancer did he have?

Oh! Your name is Maureen? I kind of like MoJim.... I'll just BET that is your Husbands name.... Jim? Hah! I'm smarter than I look.

Blondie.... I love the beach too...Last time was when we went to Melbourne Beach in Florida......and watched the turtles lay their eggs at midnight... It was magical! Seeing these huge Mama turtles, lumbering up from the water, and slowly crawling along the sand up to find a "safe" place. Then digging with her "legs" a big hole, to drop her eggs in... You didn't want to get too close, but you could "hear" her breathing, and like "grunting" until she was finished digging that special place.

If any of you are ever in an area where the turtles lay their eggs, it is something you will always remember....

Morning to you Puffin!

Welcome, Maureen. As Jackie mentioned, I'm also a newcomer. 

In this short time and speaking from personal experience, I've come into this forum terrified, with the weight of the world on my shoulders and one by one each member has defused my fears. Somehow they manage, through their nurturing words to ground you, organize your thoughts and send you out to handle the journey. They are ahead of you and me, so they know. They know how we feel. They've been there.

You and I are very fortunate to have found this forum. This is where I bring my doubts and fears knowing it's my safe place.

Catherine/Nancy

Overcast....have the pellet stoves on.  Still waiting for word on the HER2 reading. 

 I read my pathology report and got depressed, as it seems so far it indicates a high incidence of recurrence, so I decided it's best to burry my head in the sand for a while and concentrate on the positive readings of the analysis.

They weren't so upfront with information 23 years ago when I had my first cancer.  For all I know, maybe the indications were similar.

It's a rollercoaster of emotions.

MoJim:

on the left side of the page click Active Topics
scroll down until you see "Surgery - Before, During and After" in the Forum column and click on it
then scroll down until you see "Lumpectomy Lounge...let's talk" and click on it, click on add to My Favorite Topics and you won't have to look for it again, it'll show up under your Favorite Topics

then I'd jump to the end and starting reading backwards in time as it's been going on for quite awhile

OMD's&C's --- well, that is " oh my dogs and cats ".  It is freezing here and along with other chores, I had to run to the storage shed on far side of property and get the heated bucket for the dog pen.  Their dog house heater has been on for a few days already --- but we got to the frozen water this a.m.  My cat room is still ok -- it is the last to need heated water container. 

Dh couldn't help much.  He headed early for Mt. Vernon eye clinic.  He has some eye thing ( sounds like a retina that is coming un-done/detached ) so needs to deal with it.  He has very little sight ( mainly a very slight bit straight ahead ) in the other eye.  I have to go to work so --- and he just insisted that he would drive himself.  Made him promise to go the back way -- almost no traffic and no road construction and huge trucks to worry about.  I have my fingers crossed. 

Despite the small picture that was some time back -- I look pretty much just that way now.  My hair at 69 has only a little ( very little gray ) gray and with a perm is almost un-noticeable in the front -- which is why my hair is neat in front but always with a tossed around look in back -- I just comb it w/o staring into the mirror you know.

Anyway glad you are all here, each and every one.  MoJim/Maureen, you shound like you have learned strength and perseverance from the get-go with the K T issue  - and then everything that now rests on top.

Nancy Catherine -- you too have lots of struggles and you are just stepping up to the plate and getting on with it.  My little saying here  -- "amazing what you can do when you have no choice "  along the line of one of my others -- which I've seen other places lately but I've used it for years  " old too soon, smart too late ".  Some weeks that is just how it goes.

Can I ask a question -- what is a pellet stove???

I'm off to work but I'll be back afterwards to pester everyone.  See you then.

Blessings,

Jackie

Mornin, all

Chevy- glad you found you glasses. I don't have that problem because my glasses are always either on my eyes or the top of my head (when I am reading), so they don't have a chance to get very far. I am blind as a bat without them.

Sandra- I have not had cataract surgery but by DH did. His first eye surgery was for diabetic retinopathy. They never told us about not lifting, bending, etc. So that very night we went to a friends house for dinner. Tom works for the government and has to stay in shape. When we got there, he was finishing his workout in the garage. My macho man, who hadn't done any kind of weight lifting, push-ups etc since he left the Army in 1967, decided he had to prove he was in as good a shape as Tom. Anyone with eyes could see he was not. Anyway, that 10 minutes of macho man destroyed the vision in that eye forever. He could only see vague shapes from that point on. He always said the Dr screwed up, not him, and in a way he did. Unless they told Bob about the precautions when I wasn't with him, they hadn't said a word. So, yes, follow those guidelines. Bob went on to have the same surgery in the right eye, then needed cataract surgery in both eyes. He was amazed immediately and the change of vision in his right eye.

MoJim- glad to meet you and very glad you have joined our family. I empathize with you re dealing with your husband's medical issues. My DH was diagnosed with diabetes when he was in his late 30's. For years it wasn't much of a problem, even when he started needing insulin shots every day. Unfortunately, he chose to play with the amount of insulin in his shots rather than eat properly. For the final 10 years or so of his life, we were at the Drs and hospitals more than we were home it seemed like. Luckily, someone told us that diabetes was connected to the use of Agent Orange in VietNam. So we got hooked up with the VA and all his care was free. He ended up with diabetes, end stage renal failure, congestive heart failure, A fibs, diabetic retinopathy, and an extremelylarge thyroid goiter. He was on dialysis 3x a week for the last 2 1/2 years of his life. Eventually he caught a virus in his blood stream that destroyed the atrium valve in his heart. They were afraid to do the heart surgery needed because they didn't think they would be able to get the breathing tube past the goiter, and with his heart being so damaged, they couldn't do the thyroid surgrery, so they basically decided to do nothing. He passed about 3 mos later.

Catherine- so glad you have a diagnosis and the beginnings of a plan. I had a dbl mastectomy last Jan and still believe it was the right choice. I have not heard of anyone being both ER+, PR+ and also being HER+, so I think you will be okay there.

Just one more quick update- I talked to my brother for the first time last night and he sounded tired but ok. I was imagining a small incision, maybe 3 in wide or so. Nope- it goes ear to ear across his forehead. (Catherine and MoJim- he was diagnosed with a brain tumor about 10 days ago) He said he saw itfor the first time yesterday morning and scared himself in the mirror, he also has 2major black eyes from the excess blood draining downward. Right now it sounds like he'll need radiation, not chemo, but they will know more when the go back next Mon. He is so happy to be home and in his own bed.

Anne

Chevy, I've been looking for my hair dryer for 3-4 days. I use it sometimes to dry paint when I'm painting and had seen it recently, but nowhere to be found. This morning I turned around and looked at a plug that said "if dryer stops" and sure enough the dryer was on the other end. On top of my desk. Granted my desk is a catch-all, but really.

NancyCatherine.... It's alright.... Doesn't have to be our situation, sometimes I just cry when I think of our little dog we had to put to sleep.... something will remind me of her, and my heart just breaks....

You can cry, but then remember WHO you are, and what you are here for! Dry those tears, and know that you will do this once in awhile, but more and more, you will be STRONG..... just like we all are... You've been through a lot.... but you have a plan, so just remember to stick to it.

Hugs....... xoxoxoxo

Friends, I am back from work.  Nancy Catherine -- you are just having your little  " my whole life is out the window and I have no idea how I'll ever be me ( that is the REAL me again " melt-downs.  Why this ( often we are not truly even thinking about our diagnosis then ) pops up -- and it has done so for so very, very many of us -- I'm just not sure.  I think in my case it was having come so far in my life -- only to have the BIG BLACK CLOUD of cancer show up just when I was looking for life to even out for me.  I was looking toward retirement and doing many of the things I wanted too -- and enjoying life on a far, far more relaxed level.  I did not have cancer in my plans at all  and it was a major intrusion  and for some reason -- scared and upset me like nothing else that had happened to me before.

I had a huge thyroid blow-out that nearly killed me -- but it did not leave the dark cloud.  Not even close.  Then I had a brain stem stroke and again no cloud anywhere around.  Now having said that with they thyroid, I had four yrs. of therapy -- had to learn how to walk, had to re-develop all my wasted muscles, had to get over transitory amnesia, learn to cook again etc.  Then, after the stroke -- it was three yrs.  I had to re-learn a lot that time too -- though I did not have the wasted muscles so much nor did I forget as much. 

Cancer -- that is a different cloud altogether.  The other two things while very un-pleasant, did not weigh me down and cause me to think in terms of maybe I'm going to die and not get to FINISH my life.  I didn't feel that I deserved that awful fate either.  So, in the beginning -- without warning, I would suddenly wonder if I was doing some things for the last time.  I wondered a lot of things -- if I could face up the very, very un-invited fate.  If I would gain a little confidence only to have the rug ripped out from under me again.

Now, I just think those tears were meant to clean me out -- give me a fresh start, and help me deal with the fact that this life is not forever -- at least not here anyway.  I can never be thrilled that I have undergone cancer.  It was a wild ride at times, but I do feel I came away with a very expanded viewpoint of life.  There is a new and better meaning -- and there is a lot more love and sunshine.  It was my wake-up and very much my do-over.  I have a very different appreciation level for people, for animals, for caring about other people and for accepting that we need very little in life except for each other.  I now attempt to experience all of the things that were a part of me before on a different level.  When I get around things now -- I try to feel the energy, the aliveness.  I'm not really passing through life and passing time anymore. 

So, don't be alarmed that you are not in control because you've lost control a couple or more times with your diagnosis -- it seems to be a part of one of the few diagnosis that wakes us up to a different reality -- that permeates on a level that we don't seem to have experienced with other things.   Just allow yourself to give in and go with it.  I do not think it is lasting, but an interlude that most of us seem to go through.  It will get better with time and maybe a lot more when you start to feel a bit more in control of things. 

Blessings,

Jackie

Ah, Nancy Catherine -- each moment of your life, whether your up or down, busy or loafing, actually smiling or crying, able to care, or unable to empathize is a moment in your life for learning something, or experiencing.  It is just my humble opinion ( in fact, so much of what I have to say is ) but I do feel that our whole life has great purpose --  and all of those purposes are encapsulated within all the events, large and small that we encounter our whole life long.  Sinners we may be or saints, but we have to know both sides -- my truth as always been ( though I'm inclined to be a worrier so I've had some questioning times ) that our great and loving Creator could never punish us more than we punish ourselves. 

The only fish that swim up-stream are those trying to spawn -- I think we are too old -- so it is better to just go with the flow -- look at everything as something you need to know, whether positive or negative.  God is with you -- very much so, but it is just harder to feel and sense it while you don't have your bearings working well just now.  You will find yourself  - and probably in a wonderful way. 

Your ok Nancy Catherine, you are really OK. 

Hugs and blessings

Jackie

Teka -- that is so spot on.

Chevy, you were right -- I just had "issues" with what seemed such a small picture.  I just can't figure how it got so small.  So, I figure now that everyone can't possibly know what I look like from such a small picture...I'll get one of my roses.

Jackie