Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
Comments
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Mornin all,
This is a picture of my brother and I visiting our Aunt a few months ago. My aunt passed away earlier his week. Aunt Sally was the matriarch of our family, my Dad's only sister, and the baby of the 4 siblings. In this picture, Aunt Sally knows very clearly who we are, but has no idea what we are talking about. Doesn't matter- we were smiling and having a good time, so she was smiling too. She lost her short term memory several years ago, but it didn't change her personality at all. She lived a busy, exciting life with her husband (who wanted to date my Mom, but she was already dating my dad) and 5 kids in Montreal. Good thing things worked out way they did,because my Mom couldn't live 30 min away from her family- a story for another day. Aunt Sally was nothing if not Irish. The family moved here when she was a young girl, but she loved nothing as much as an Irish song h fest- whether at an Irish Pub , or a family gathering.
She had an unbelievably happy outlook on life. She enjoyed being with the whole family, regardless of the reason. The only time I ever remember her being sad was when my Dad died. He was her favorite sibling, and vice versa. She and I bonded even tighter at my Dad's funeral because we were his two favorite people. I was Daddy's little girl and every one knew that. She loved to travel and went to Ireland several times. She had plans to go to Ireland with my Dad, who had never been back, but he passed before they had a chance.
With her short term memory, she laughed along with us. The day of this picture, as her daughter got her settled in her wheelchair to go to lunch, and she handed her Mom a bright pink purse. All the way to the car, my Aunt said what a pretty purse it was, but who did it belong to? Her daughter answered each time that it was hers, she had picked it out a week ago. She praised herself for such good taste, took a breath and asked again, totally forgetting the conversation which had just happened. She was reading a book, and constantly told her daughter that when she finished this book, she wanted another one by the same author. So every time she got 2/3 thru the book, my cousin would move the bookmark back to chapter 2 or 3. Happy to say, she enjoyed reading it each time.
She was a truly special person, and there is nothing we all wouldn't do for her. It amazes me that she could maKe each of us feel like her favorite, but not cause ant jealousy at all. She was in her upper 90's when she passed and we will all miss her very much.
Off to do more college shopping, so till later,
Anne
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May Aunt Sally rest in peace Anne. She sounds like the sort of Aunt all of us would love to have had. I did by the way love all my Aunts on my Mom's side -- only one on my Dad's side and she lived in California while we and mom's side of the family were all in the same little part of southern Illinois. It is fantastic that the short tern memory issues didn't change Ms. Sally. I'm sure it made it easier for her family to accept this problem since there was no substantial change in her demeanor.
I do very much believe there are people ( and your Aunt Sally sure sounds like it fits ) that radiate such a loving amt. of spirit that others are eager to experience the comfort, joy, and acceptance that just naturally flows from them to you. Loved hearing Sally's story thru you.
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How lucky you were, Anne, to have Aunt Sally in your life! She sounds like the kind of person each of us would love to have met. I'm sorry for your loss but so glad you got to spend time with her recently.
MJ
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Against all odds, a seed rises from darkness and beautifies the universe. ~ Matshona Dhliwayo
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Beauty of a day though we had some light sprinkles already and could have more through the day. Seems from weather map lots of people may be having the same. It is keeping it majorly cool for this time of year. We have windows and doors open with fans to circulate. Won't get above 70 today or if so not far enough to matter. We are once again saving on a/c which was not on yesterday either. Works for me.
Still working on convincing myself we are already into August and feeling Fall is coming too fast for me. Still so much undone, though I really haven't quit working on things so I can forgive myself that anyway. I think that is what life is anyway isn't it ? Always refining and hoping to make something better. Nothing in life is ever totally perfect but what some even small improvement could help in some way. Something as simple as paying attention when the birds sing you a symphony. Of course I thought about that because my window is open this morning and some happy birds are singing/talking/ whistling a happy tune, or whatever. Grateful to have their company today.
I hope all of you are going to have a fantastic day.
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My new great-grandson....born today
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It's so hard to lose someone.... No matter if family or dearest friend....It's just a loss.... in your heart.
Theresa, our oldest dearest friend just passed away.... Funny how, I still wait for her to call.... every night for the last 2 years that she was in Assisted Living.... At least it happened fast... I think something like an aorta aneurysm.... Called the ambulance, brought her around, then in the Hospital they let her go.... Thank God she didn't have to suffer... Hope she wasn't afraid... I just wish I could have told her I loved her once more... I did every night, but didn't think I would ever lose her...
But I have Sheri and the boys here, since last Wednesday.... Boys flying back right now, and Sheri will be here until Wednesday night! We went to the Pearl Street Mall in Boulder today, with Janie.... It was a PARTY!!! Loved every minute with them....
I think maybe God knew I would need them here, when he took Theresa home....
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What a beautiful baby -- congrats to the parents and great grandma.
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Glad Sunny that you had someone with you too as Theresa departed for somewhere better for her. It will always hurt because we are empathetic and loving people who cherish all who spend wonderful times with us in our life -- as well as we in theirs. Even when we know in our hearts it is a better thing for them, it takes time for us to let go of all we had and shared. We can't ever be completely ready because when loved ones go they take a little part of us with them and it takes us a bit of time to learn to not miss that part. The nice part is that where she is going she will have perfect knowledge and will KNOW how much you cared about her and how sorry you feel that you didn't get the chance to tell her so one more time.
I'm glad you have and are still enjoying your family. It is a good time to deeply feel connections we still do have near at hand. Love and healing energy to you and Theresa's family.
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Chevy, so sorry for the loss of your dear friend. Hope memories of happier times together help you through this difficult time.
Ducky, what a handsome baby. Hope you have many happy times together.
Oncologist appointment tomorrow. Four years since diagnosis. Wonder what test she has dreamed up this time? Feeling very fortunate that she hasn't been able to find anything.
Jo
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thanks ladies he is.....now we have another problem...his Mama, my grandaughter has something called ..Post Partum Preeclampsia...a rare and very serious condtion that happens right after giving birth.....
Her blood pressure has sky rocketed and now she has blurry vision...they are keeping her in the hospital and have moved her to another floor in maternity so she can be monitored constantly......
Complications are seizures, lung edema, and stroke....it can also be fatal...they are treating her with anit-seizure meds to avoid a seizure, and high blood pressure meds......her delivery was very rough, but she is a trooper.....love her so much.....but she looked wiped out when I saw her last night......will keep you all posted...This was taken right before she delivered........Prayers please........
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This is Kaileen on her wedding day.0 -
Congratulation, ducky, on your new great-grandson and prayers for your granddaughter. Having a baby seems like such a natural thing - we forget what a miracle it is and how many complications there can be. I hope she will be home soon with her new little one.
MJ
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I would never want to carry around all the material objects I have acquired over a lifetime. It would be impossible. Yet this is what I do on an emotional level when I refuse to let go of yesterday's mistakes and hurts. And I add to the burden when I take on concerns about tomorrow. -unattributed
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Prayers, healing energies and hope for Mom and going home safe and sound to care for the new very little guy in her and his daddy's life.
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Praying that the treatment will avoid any further complications and she will be able to go home to her new little one!
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Ducky, healing prayers for your DGD’s swift & uneventful recovery & discharge to home. What an adorable baby! Anne, sorry for losing Aunt Sally; and Chevy, your dear friend. May their memories be for a blessing.
Just got back from the MO—everything looks good. She’s not worried about my anemia because it’s so mild, and she thinks that despite my weight I am losing fat and gaining muscle.
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Ooooh, wish someone would say that about me. Of course they might if I exercised.
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Thinking of you Ducky.... has to be so hard for all of you! xoxo
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Ducky, I hope you have good news tomorrow.
Chevy, Therese could not have had a better friend than you. I know you'll miss her, but you did a world of good for her visiting and staying in touch.
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Have you had a kindness shown?
Pass it on;
'Twas not given for thee alone,
Pass it on;
Let it travel down the years,
Let it wipe another's tears,
Till in Heaven the deed appears--
Pass it on.
Henry Burton0 -
Hi all,
Here are two before pix of my DGS's dorm room at the University of Georgia
And here is the finished product.
These are my two grandsons, sitting on the futon under Michael's bed. It was so much fun putting it all together, especially since his roommate is his best friend, So everyone knew each other. We bought stuff for both boys and so did Chris's mother. Much easier than having to work to fix half of the room and hope it works with the roommate. I can't think of anything else they could need. Most kids, we found out, raise their beds up high to basically get them out of the way. Chris's Mom found a futon that fits under Michael's bed and there's a mini fridge, microwave and Kuerig under Chris's. They probably won't use the dishes much because the dining halls (there are six) offer a major variety of food. Michael will never complain that there's nothing to eat again. They may use the bowls for ice cream late at night, but that's about it. They have a kitchen on the first floor, but I don't picture them using it much.
The biggest concern I had was getting to his room on the fourth floor of a building that has no elevator, and it wasn't too bad. My DD wanted to go somewhere to eat, then come back to make their beds. Luckily, everyone else wanted to finish the beds, then go to eat. It was obvious our guys wanted to meet up with their friends for dinner, but Chris's mom said they will be with their friends every day and they could have one last dinner with all of us, which they did, and did it gracefully- not upset at all. I'm sure they met up with friends as soon as they got back to the dorm. There are about six of them at UGA, with four of them being friends since 5th grade. It was a fun day.
Ducky, Kaileen is on my church prayer chain. Praying everything clears up and she and the baby go home soon.
Anne
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My son was in a three-man dorm when he was a freshman at college,too.
That was in 2003. Only difference, I wasn't allowed to go in, even on the first day. H moved him in while I sat in the lobby.
This was at Baylor University.
The girls were on the other side of campus with the seminary between them.
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My housekeeper got hit with a double whammy. First, now that she’s about healed from her bunion surgery, her knee is alternately locking up & giving out (and in pain of course). She made an appt. to see an orthopod at Rush tomorrow but doesn’t want to do a TKR (or any more surgery for quite awhile), and will probably get cortisone &/or hyaluronic acid shots (I hear they’ve improved since mine were unsuccessful back in 2003) and maybe a custom-fit offloader brace. But yesterday, she got a call that her husband was in the ER across town in Melrose Park. He’s a long-time Type 2 diabetic, prostate cancer survivor, and has had at least one stent. His kidneys aren’t quite at dialysis-level yet but they’re not good. He felt shaky and faint in a restaurant bathroom and next thing he knew he was on a gurney being loaded into the ambulance. Thus far, there are no clues—his kidneys are “at 20” (my housekeeper didn’t say whether that was an enzyme level or percentage of function) but “28” is the low end of normal. Glucose normal (or as normal as it gets for a diabetic). EKG negative for heart attack, carotid Doppler neg. for plaque. The working hypothesis is something is causing hypoxia, and last I heard he was being taken to Nuclear Cardiology. Will know more about him (and my housekeeper’s knee) tomorrow. Meanwhile, they could use some prayers (they’re devout—he’s a "preacher’s kid").
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Hi Chevy!!!!! Hugs😍
GO DAWGS love Athens, DD did grad school there.
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Sandy, Hope it's good news for your housekeeper and her DH.
Velvet, That sounds like Baylor all right.
Ducky, Hope things are going better.
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Common sense in an uncommon degree is what the world calls wisdom.
Samuel Taylor Coleridge0 -
(((( --------- ))))) Sandy for your housekeeper and family. If I didn't feel the struggles of living tend to have needed lessons I'd be so against them. It is difficult though to get several "issues" at once to work through. Here's hoping really good answers and fixes for all turn up.
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thanks ladies..your all so kind...well Kaileens pressure spiked last night agter coming off the magnisum sulfate...it shot from 166/90 t 170/105....hey now have her on Procardia after her OB called in a Cardiologist.......she will keep her on it for 3 weeks...still can't go home.......she is very emotional and cried on my shoulder when I went to see her today......frustrated.....trying to breast feed....legs and feet look like tree stumps and she is a tiny little thing....stitches from a vaginal tear, and has been in 5 days.......she is very depressed so it has us worriied___she is a nurse in the NICU AT children's Hospital in Philly......eaelier today her pressure dropped to 124/80
My daughter just text me...it just spiked back to 166/105_____please keep praying.
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Still praying, Ducky.
Housekeeper’s knee is officially bone-on-bone; she had a cortisone shot and feels much better. Got fitted for an offloader brace and may try hyluronic-gel shots down the line. Still can’t figure out her husband’s syncope—glucose, BP, O2 sats, electrolytes normal. Yet he had a dizzy spell and fell in the bathroom again (fortunately, the nurse’s aide was right outside the door).
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