Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

@owensgrandma - I admire you for continuing to work. Both my parents were in inpatient hospice at the end of their lives. The nurses were angels and were so helpful to our family.

@illinoislady - I agree about SE’s from one med causing a need for a second med. I stopped taking anastrozole after 2+ years because my bone density decreased by 9% in two years and my cholesterol spiked. Once I stopped the AI, my cholesterol dropped 30 points. My annual PCP visit is next month and I am due for another Dexa scan so I’ll see how things look at this time. I cannot tolerate statins but have had success with Zetia but my current PCP won’t prescribe Zetia but refuses to explain why. According to her it’s a statin or nothing. I’ll see how it goes.

Petite - good to hear from you and that all is normal.

Betrayal - if you are reading along, I’m thinking of you.

Cindy - you are such a good person to get up before dawn to take your neighbors to the airport AND take care of another neighbors dog.

Canarycat - oh my, those sweets look heavenly.

Chris - I hope the splints help the thumbs. This sounds very painful.

Taco - It seems taking over the financial stuff from Ken was the right thing to do. DH and I split most of the financial stuff so if one of us is no longer able to handle it we have some idea of our situation. Although that is easier said than done. But eventually I think we will reach that point where one of us needs to take all of it over.

Catherina - i was on my employer’s health insurance when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I went on original Medicare plus AARP/UHC Supplement plan G and a Humana drug plan in mid 2023. When I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2024, all my bills were covered except for the Medicare Part B deductible and some pain meds. But I know this varies widely depending on your plan.

Had an eye doctor appointment this afternoon, grabbed lunch at the mall and headed back to our house 20 miles away to choose the stain for the wood floors. Stopped by the grocery store to pick up dinner and then headed back to the hotel, stopping at a park along the way for a walk and fresh air. We found out yesterday that when the remediation crew removed our kitchen cabinets and quartz countertops they gouged and chipped both perimeter pieces. The project manager says it can be repaired but I’m not so sure. We’ll let them try to fix it and if it’s not acceptable we’ll figure it out from that point.

‘Hello to Carole. Wren, Reader, Sandy, Minustwo, and anyone else I missed.

My little HP laptop won't support Windows 11, and, as everyone probably knows, Microsoft will stop updating the Windows 10 in October. I was already thinking I would need to buy a new laptop by October. The consensus seems to be that the tariff on goods from China will raise the prices on computers. So… I went to the Microsoft website and determined what I need in a new laptop. I don't do streaming or gaming for entertainment. Yesterday I checked computers in my category at Best Buy. Next I went to Sam's Club and ended up buying another HP Pavilion that was marked down to $399. I like it because it's small and compact. I don't like the big laptops.

Now I have two laptops in operation. Amazingly (to me), when Windows updated on the new HP, it picked up all the usual places I visit daily, like bc.org, NYT, WAPO, NOLA. They're all there on the Edge browser. I've been researching transferring pictures and documents. When I purchased the older HP from Best Buy, I paid for them to do the transfer.

On the subject of statins, dh cannot tolerate any of them. They cause such leg and muscle pain that he is incapacitated. His cardiologist at the time tried him on Rapatha, which is in injection form every two weeks. It worked very well but is expensive. He applied to the company for a cheaper rate and was successful in getting the price down. Since he has modified his diet and lost almost 30 lbs since last summer, his cholesterol may be low enough without the Rapatha.

I did packing for my trip in my sleep last night and woke up tired. Yesterday I took clothes to the guest bedroom and laid them on the bed, following Betrayal's example.

Wishing everyone a good Friday.

I’ll blame Carole for reminding me about the Windows 10 not being supported after October. Ugh, I’ll have to open mine up to see what I’m running. Partner says he switched to 11. Mine has been so slow, I’m betting I didn’t switch over.

Drugs - well I took a bone drug while on the AI, to offset the bone loss. A drug to fix the SE of another drug, I hated it.

Dog - well to say it’s a lot, and exhausting is an understatement. He snores just to breathe.
*First night, actually morning, he was here about 5:40 AM. He ran around like a crazy dog, rubbing his face on the bottom of my sofa & loveseat (leather so no fur stuck), he was wired. At 6:15 I went to bed, he seemed to be asleep. At 10:30 I woke up to a poop & pee on the tiles. I cleaned them up and got him out - blaming myself, his time clock gets him out by 10 - which usually isn’t a problem for me. But I was near as discombobulated as he was.
*Last night 4 AM he was scratching and head butting our bedroom door. Partner said he had just taken him for a walk at 3:30; he thinks maybe that got him wired. We were both up, I sent partner back to bed. Dog was asleep and I went back to bed. Within minutes he was scraping on the door again. I got up yelling NO NO NO, bed! And picked him up and put him on his bed. I went back to bed, it was 5 AM. Awake at 9, I immediately put clothes on and took him out for a walk. I’m so out of sorts - I didn’t wash my face, brush my teeth, nor comb my hair. LOL By the time we get back in, I don’t know what I’m doing - routine is off for my meds & breakfast.
He’s been out for another walk, visiting with all the neighbors. The family had some Amazon deliveries so I took him inside his house - he was very happy but I let him see that no one is there.
Tonight I may bring his crate over, we are both exhausted and he just naps the day away!

Tonight we pick up my niece & daughter in Sarasota, they flew there to save $200 but I’ll be driving 3+ hours up & back. I should have paid the $200! Dog will go to his house while we’re gone, just in case he destroys something at my house.

My niece said now I’ll need to get a dog. I’ve reassured her, no no no I do not need a dog.

I’m off to open my computer to check what I’m running. I hope I don’t need a new one.

Dropping in to say it will take me days to play catch up. Surgery went well, but post-op course not so good. Just discharged today and a long story I will save for when I am reacclimated to being home. Here's just one snippet.

Nurse's were wonderful and the relatively new and short-handed one last evening was my biggest help. She said it was nice to learn from a patient who advocates for herself which I had to do with 2 physicians and the DO was not a happy camper with me, so his words were "I will return your care to Orthopedics and they can take over".

He made a unilateral care/medication decision yesterday that put me in a precarious position late last night (11 PM) and I was not happy because he exposed me to an unknown outcome risk. So the Ortho doc countermanded it since he, the perpetrator, was unavailable and he was not happy with me today that "I did not follow orders". More later, those with a nursing background might understand more of the events.

I am feeling good, knee pain controlled and new issues that arose post-op are being dealt with.

Hi to everyone. It's good to be home again.

I too am buying electronics ASAP - my iPhone needs to be replaced. Will do it Monday while Ella is skating.

Don't remember who asked but I was on Medicare when diagnosed. I have a very good supplement from the American Medical Society and paid for no cancer treatments except the AI's which I paid for with my AARP drug plan. Be cautious of a Medicare Advantage plan from anyone. Co-pays got outrageous for a friend and that was several years ago. It is my understanding that if you start with an Advantage Plan, regular Medicare doesn't have to take you back.

I'm glad I'm taking on the bill paying now but I sure wish the transition was easier. It's getting through the AI phone system before one can talk to a real person that got me down. The bank told me that according to their comparison with his check book, it hadn't balanced in 4 months.

Ken seems more willing to talk about his challenges, both physical and mental, than he has in the past. He got lost last week and "failed" the "repeat 3 things" test when he saw his primary yesterday. Arteries are closing up everywhere, I think.

Betrayal - I know you will keep sticking up for your treatment. You go, girl!

Cindy, if the dog has been crated, he may in fact be calmer when you get his crate. I'm surprised your friend didn't send it with him. Does he have any kind of "lovey" ? Mutz has a blanket he's very attached to. Jackie may want to chime in but we've never had an adult dog, large or small, that couldn't make it through the night without a potty break. The crate should help with that too. You can also put it far enough from your bedroom that you can't hear him. (My pediatrician suggested that we put our son to sleep somewhere where we couldn't hear him when he was waking up for play time rather than a bottle in the middle of the night. It was hard for a few nights but it worked. When you have two kids 9 months apart, sleep becomes as very precious commodity.)

Have a good weekend, everyone.

I woke up this morning with my heartrate down to normal! I agree, the more meds you take, the more complicated the interactions are. Best to not take anything unnecessarily.

My eyes have been burning lately, and drops do not work well. I desperately want to cry tears, but I think when I do dwell on those things, my nose gets wet. I need to explore tear duct plugs.

I am busy writing, but I need to take a break today to clean up the apt. Relatives coming this evening.

I agree. Adult dogs do not need to be pottied during the night. Unless Tippy is mad at me, he does fine for up to twelve hours at a time. If he is hungry for attention during the day, he uses the poop button. I just tell him, "Yes, Tippie did poop" with buttons and/or without. We have a new button, "working" for when I am on the laptop and he wants attention and I won't comply.

I am on Windows 11. I had to check.

Good morning. Whew, finally, a super sunny morning. Sky looks full blue and clear as a bell. About time. Hmm, dogs. We have had all sizes. Most of our dogs, after a brief period, could be let outside on their own to go (not something you could do for a 'visiting' dog) but all seemed to learn to 'hold it' till someone in the family was awake to let them out. We do get up early most of the time around here, so had few issues. Lil' Red still uses potty papers at night. He has for some reason been hard to discipline. I'm sure he will have "puppy" exuberance for quite some time yet.

We had a crate for him that rapidly became too small. I purchased it on the wt. he was to get, but he got bigger. So, he is not a 'crate' dog. I agree though. If the dog was used to a crate, it should have gone with him for staying with any other friend or neighbor. Animals are like us, creatures of habit and are thrown off by extreme, quick changes.

We do not have Medicare. Hate owing up, but Dh was not good with finance matters but took them over once when I was ill. Turned out such a mess took place we had to opt out of Medicare. This was made possible (not really advisable) by the fact we were both Veterans and could use the V.A. for all medical care. We couldn't afford Medicare then and in the ensuing years the price has gone up making it even more impossible. We have to hope now that we can keep up medically with the sort of things that are happening in our government. We also have some trepidations going on our Social Security which is all we have.

Taco, it is a REAL chore to set up yourself as paymaster when someone else has done it for a long time. All those now automated systems. I hate talking to machines to begin with but once they finally have YOUR acct. nos. linked into your acct. it goes ok. One of my bills —even today, I have to be transferred twice to the automated teller which always makes me irritated because you have to listen to the 'options' list twice. I always want to yell — just take my d##am money please and lets get on with it. For some things my patience has some real limits.

I'm sorry to hear that Ken does seem to be losing ground so much. I'm still in awe that he was able to give you a 'take over' please on the importance of handing the family book-keeping.

My BIL got on Medicare Advantage (in addition to his regular Medicare) but as you said — it didn't work out well for him. His plan (I don't know anything else about it) turns out to sound fantastic till you actually need to use it. His church ended up paying the co-pay for his radiation treatments. I'm not sure he will look around and assess other plans either. His friends (church and political) urged the Advantage plan to him and so he likely will stick with it as imperfect as it turned out to be for him.

I hope you all have a great Saturday.

Dog - he truly isn’t crate trained, I think he was placed in it when parties were going on and they feared him getting stepped on, or a kid hurting him. I brought it over yesterday before going out to dinner, so at night it would be here. Last night I attempted to get him in it and he had zero interest in going into it - in fact he got a case of the zoomies. But he did stay away from our bedroom door all night.

This morning I jumped out of bed at 7:40, asleep after 3AM, stumbling out door to get the dog out. He peed 4x, pooped too. Back in the house I’m still discombobulated as my niece gets up and says he had peed outside their bedroom door. UGH. I cleaned that up, Clorox wiped the floor, dried it with paper towels.

The consensus is he misses his family, he sleeps in the bed of the daughter. I won’t allow him in the bedrooms here, they’re carpeted vs the rest of the house is tiled. He’s cute as a button, good thing haha, and I’m hoping only one more night (tonight).

I’ve set my clothes up for tomorrow morning so I can jump in as my feet hit the ground. Totally unsure when I’ll be up, my niece & her daughter are getting up at 6 to catch a boat to Key West. We know he’ll be awake with them, which could entail me being up then as well.

I did take an hour plus long nap today and could do it again tomorrow I suppose. HA! I’m already looking forward to Monday with no dog. 🐶

Betrayal, glad to hear you’re ok, and we’re on top of all the goings on at the hospital. Gassy dog has had us jumping up to put the ceiling fans on.

Canary, woo hoo on rads ending soon.

Jackie, by time we came home from the airport with family (12:40AM) I think the computer updated. But won’t fully know until I reopen it, after the dog is gone!

Taco, now he says he’s not putting a tariff on electronics such as computers - but that could change on a dime too. I give your dh credit for going with the flow on passing the torch to you for bill paying.

Chris, I’m glad you and Tippy are doing well.

Carole, I’m in agreement with you on WHAT is going on. And I hope you enjoyed your gathering.

Buying stuff - I did go on Amazon and buy another extra pair of ASICS sneakers. I googled where the company was - Japan, and felt ok about that. Then googled further and found they’re manufactured in Vietnam and China. So on that front, I’m set for a year.

We took the kids out to Joe's Seafood & Steak for their Passover menu. (The temple isn't doing a Seder this year and it's not worth making one for just us two). Kinda miss the ritual of reading through the haggaddah (especially the part where we hold up the matzo and declare "this is the bread of affliction," to which my boss—alev hasholom—would always add "the affliction in question being constipation"). Still, it was nice to cut to the chase and chow down. Even with my reduced appetite and early satiety causing portion control, I'm still up late dealing with the consequences but it was worth it. Of course, we have leftovers. (Regular & vegetarian chopped liver, halibut and glazed carrots, plus a couple of house-made macaroons). Matzo brei for brunch.

Leslie's dad (Gordy's FIL) was diagnosed in October with bile duct cancer but they couldn't locate a primary tumor. Chemo (5-FU) didn't help much and radiation was not well tolerated. Unfortunately, they just located the primary: the tail of the pancreas. At least it's neuroendocrine (if you have to get pancreatic cancer, it's the best-case scenario—the kind Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Steve Jobs had). He's feeling great—he & Leslie's mom are vacationing in Mexico City and plan to travel some more this summer, possibly Switzerland. He's applying for an immunotherapy trial at M.D. Anderson (they live in Katy, just outside Houston). MDA has surpassed both MSK and Dana-Farber as the nation's best cancer center.

Gordy, after his routine bloodwork came back with a high hematocrit and red cell count, was diagnosed with secondary polycythemia vera—caused by years of sleep apnea and lifelong asthma. His insurance barely covered the hematology consult and consequent bloodletting. I teased him by saying he could have just gone down to the Red Cross and not only done it for free but get juice & cookies afterward. (Bob donates every 8 weeks because I no longer can due to the melanoma). We joked that if we combined his blood with my anemia and divided it up between us & re-infused it, we'd both be hematologically normal.

Chris, I suspect we are of different minds as to the result of last week's WI Supreme Court election. (I'm delighted). Before I could post anything on Facebook I got a meme: in Madison's Capitol Square, a glant foam cheese-head crushing a Cybertruck. Speaking of which, I'm beginning to see bumper stickers on Teslas proclaiming "Vintage Tesla" (i.e., pre-DOGE).

The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another's world.

Bill Bullard

Yep. I hear on the news first thing this morning that many electronics, including computers, are excluded from the 145 percent tariff on China. Also, I read yesterday that a lot of business CEOs are pressuring Microsoft to change their decision not to update Windows 10 after October. No word from Microsoft. Yet. So much for trying to keep my ducks in a row.

I favor cats, maybe because of their independent natures. There may come a time when we adopt a small dog for dh. We've noticed that walking the family dog gets older people out of the house for a little exercise.

It's a beautiful day today. I went for a walk in the neighborhood and timed myself, 32 minutes. DH is out in his woodworking shop. He has been frustrated with his woodturning efforts lately and is talking about going back to building some furniture. He'll have to find a home for whatever he builds because we don't have any extra space in the house. If something comes in, something will need to go out.

We're recording the Masters golf and will watch it later.

Happy Sunday.

Not much funny happened during hospitalization, but then there was the debacle of the call bell that didn't work. One night after a dose of IV diuretic, I needed someone to turn off the bed alarm and escort me to the bathroom. Anyone who has had IV diuretic's knows it is important to get a prompt response since it can be touch and go when your bladder feels like it will burst.

I could see they were notified, but then I could also see someone was cancelling the call. Finally, I started calling out, but later learned I was a great distance from nurses station, so no response either. Then I started to yell and the PCT comes in to chide me for "not responding to them through the call system paddle" and I told them I did not hear them at all. After getting settled again, it was determined my call system probably had not worked since admission since it was missing a vital part: the connection to the bed. So the TV part worked, communication system not operable.

Next day a repair man comes, tinkers around with 2 different wall accesses, tells me cord is missing from bed and disappears to bring back a "new paddle" which also didn't work. He leaves and says someone will be here to fix it tomorrow. So they put a note on the main call system that I could call them, just not respond.

Next day another repair man shows up clutching the inevitable screw driver in his hand, proceeds to disconnect the main panel from the wall, and can't reinstall it so the nurses' s had to tape it to the wall because it was their way of cancelling the call within the room. At this point, I suggest a new bed might be the answer and the repair man tells me "nah" that won't work. The nurse tells him to give it a try, they swap beds, and "voile" I now have a working system.

Then he attempts to take credit for the "fix". Next day 2 repair men show up to fix the system and it is working much to their chagrin. Asked how it was fixed and I told them by replacing the bed, since the problem wasn't either wall outlet. Disbelief, until they talked to the nurse and she told them it was true.

So I told them I wanted a cut of their checks for the repair job. LOL.

Today is first day without full-blown decadron in system, so pain up appreciably but manageable. PT intake done today and she will be back on Wednesday. Biggest issue is spasms in shin and calf so taking Flexeril for that. Spasms not relieved by flexing. Napped this afternoon even though I slept well last night.

Sunny and in high 50's today with a brisk breeze. DH says it is nice out there.

Sandy, sorry to hear about DS's FIL. Have to say the matzo comment made me laugh hard. I happen to like it but haven't had it in many moons.

Hope everyone had a great day.

Chris - you said it so well. I think the Pope did too. I suspect you are not the only person of faith who struggled with the election. I do understand the conflict you are describing.

When I ran for public office in '86, I asked a member to set up a meeting with our local priest. The priest knew I had been very involved with NOW and other feminist groups but we talked about how we could work together on other humanitarian issues. I have never been sorry I asked for that meeting. I served on a commission on teen-age pregnancy and the nun on the panel and I had some wonderful conversations. Maine was very early on family medical leave, school based childcare, and better housing for addicted women. I think I was helpful in much of that legislation and other bills that helped disadvantaged people.

Betrayal - I certainly hope this is your last medical disaster. The medical system hasn't been good for you at all. Thank goodness, you know enough to advocate for yourself. I sure felt over my head when Ken was in the hospital for 2 weeks.

Jackie, loved the dog and cat descriptions. I find them very true. We have had both and when I am no longer able to walk a dog, I definitely will have a cat. With no fences and coyotes wandering the neighborhood, we don't dare just let a dog out to do his business. Mutz was young enough when we got him that we might have been able to paper train him but it didn't occur to me at the time. Eight years later, we can't even get him to go on the patio or garage when it's raining (he absolutely hates getting wet, unlike our lab mixes.) We have never crated a dog but I agree that animals do need a "safe space." Mutz likes the back corner of our master closet.

Sandy, I'm sure you will be glad to be back in your home. We sure were after our fire! If you can't sell your larger clothes, I suggest you look for a program that helps women returning to the work force. A domestic violence shelter administrator could head you in the right direction and your donation would be tax deductible.

I'm still going to buy a new phone. Who knows how long the exemption will last… May be off before I get to the Apple Store tomorrow.

Taco

Kitty, love the cat tent!

Betrayal, have you thought about magnesium? Before I lost the weight (and especially if I'd gone overboard on sugary bedtime snacks) I'd awaken about an hour before dawn with horrible cramps in my R tibia—could see the muscles ripple, the foot dorsiflex, the toes splay out. Rubbing my shin with TheraWorx (topical lotion or foam, brand or generic magnesium solution) made it possible for me to get up & walk around without screaming until the spasm abated and I could get back to sleep. Going on Zepbound necessitated my taking magnesium glycinate at bedtime to prevent constipation, but it also helped me fall asleep faster. Hadn't needed to use the TheraWorx again till a couple of months into maintenance when I began to indulge sugar cravings before bedime—and just like when I was obese, the spasms returned on nights when I'd had sugar before going to bed. I keep a bottle of store-brand TheraWorx at bedside, and take two mag glycinate at bedtime.

My hospital adventure stories? First time I was hospitalized was at 13 for appendectomy. Kept getting awakened for vitals checks, then meds, then more vitals, lather, rinse, repeat. Just as I was drifing off, the lights snapped on and a cheery voice chirped "Enema time!" and then a beat or two later, "oops. sorry, wrong room!" Fast forward to my first TKR in 2012. Due to my house having stairs up from the street, preventing my going to mandatory PT twice a day (without springing for medi-cars at $100 per ride, not covered by insurance), I had to do in-patient rehab. The only one available on short notice that took my insurance was also a nursing home. Men & women in the same corridor, and post-op patients next to MRSA and memory care ones. A guy kept wandering into my room berating me for never calling him (quoting the line from King Lear about an ungrateful child), and it took several tries before the CNAs (there was only one nurse, RN or LPN, per floor) determined he was not just demented but terminal and had lost his daughter five years earlier to the same cancer that was claiming him. I understood, but still insisted I be moved waaaay down the hall from him, next to the nurses' station.

Chicago has a Dress for Success program that provides donated business clothing for young women entering the workforce (as well as prom dresses for impoverished teens), so I will donate my suits there. (My evening wear is too conservative for today's prom-going teens). Care for Real (food bank, pet food pantry, clothing, shoes & household goods) is in the neighborhood—they have been providing clothing for newly-arrived refugees. They might be willing to take more casual clothing, even bras. Third Love has a program that accepts used (but washed) bras to donate to shelters and "developing" countries—they give you the bag, you fill it and mail it back (or bring it in to one of their boutiques, thereby saving postage). Some of my stuff can even go to the prop/costume closet at the Chicago Bar Association for upcoming Bar Shows—there's always a paucity of larger sizes.