Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Hi all… I am definitely interested in participating in a group for "older women", as our challenges, issues we face etc. are much different than women who are in the earlier chapters of life.

I am hoping that we can form a group with over 50 or over 55 Thrivers and we can have some great discussions about the challenges we face at this stage. We can be here to support, care and help one another!!!!

Also, can someone please let me know how to become part of the weekly "chat" that was mentioned earlier? It is true that some of us who are older don't have quite as much technological savvy.

I look forward to connecting and feel it is a great benefit for all of us!!

Hi Betrayal,

Thanks for your note back. I am just looking to join a group of "older" women. I am 58 which I know is a "younger older", but am looking at retirement with my diagnosis and recovery Journey from BC. My husband is quite a few years older, and we are dealing with a whole host of issues from aging to the radical ways this diagnosis and Journey changes lives. I recently just had a DMX, and find that my recovery is not going along anything like what I have seen much younger women post about. While I appreciate everyone's posts, it does make me feel even work - more inferior - since my body is not healing as quickly as theirs and has had quite a bit more discomfort. That's the last thing I need mentally and spiritually. I feel that those of us who are over 55 will most often have slower healing and different responses from the immune system that might be less resilient. In addition, there are even more layers of post menopausal issues that come about to make things even more interesting, I feel there are lots of relevant things that we might be able to share and learn from one another from our experiences and wisdom. Just my opinion. I am/was part of the January Surgery group as well - but that seems to have gone by the wayside. I wish cancer could go by the wayside, but find we all can still benefit from support.

Tonight we had my SO’s birthday dinner with about 15 of us. His birthday isn’t for another month, but we’ll be in Key West celebrating it so I needed to pick a different date. Next weekend is Super Bowl, then Valentine’s Day, then another bday, then we have guests, then we go away, and another bday occurs. So today it was!

I made reservations at a restaurant. When I called the lady answered at the front desk and then transferred me to the manager. He took my name, date we wanted, number in the party and the time.

Tonight a few others were at the restaurant ahead of us, so when we got there the first thing they said was no reservation was made. I looked at my phone log and it shows I called. The manager just never notified any one of the 15 person party.

Dinner - we had 4 people at a booth, the rest of us lined up at a group of tables. Ordered drinks and got down to placing food orders. They were out of the special - pork dinner; they were out of rye bread for a Ruben; no bacon for a cheeseburger; and lastly ran out of large napkins and used bar sized ones instead.

From chaos to fun - the food we had was good, as was the company. We sang happy birthday, and cut the cake. We all enjoyed ourselves but remarked we probably wouldn’t plan another Sunday get together again. SO received a lot of nice cards and generous gifts. Alls well that ends well.

Hope we all stay warm, and that our plants survive in the southern states.

The most valuable possession you can own is an open heart. The most powerful weapon you can be is an instrument of peace.

Carlos Santana

Justforher, a frightening experience. So glad you're doing better.

This morning the temperature is 28 and it's sunny. Good news is a week ahead with no freezing temperatures. Good news for Mardi Gras parades and parade goers. Good news for all of us!!!

Cindy, what a fiasco with the birthday dinner. It will go into the collection of birthday memories. The manager should have done something to make amends. A round of free drinks would have been nice.

Yesterday I started adjusting the text size on my laptap. Adjust and unadjust. I've finally settled on a slightly larger size.

Today I plan to get OUT OF THE HOUSE. Yay. Sam's Club. Gym.

Last night after going to bed, I finally remembered Connie's bird name. Puffin.

Happy Monday to everyone.

justforher,

Hang Tough! 😘

Lifewell2 - "Age is just a number." Especially with an older spouse, you may find us a good fit. If not, keep browsing or as someone suggested, start your own group and see if it takes off. Most, but not all of us are retired. A few decided on retirement after diagnosis. We talk often about grandchildren rather than children. And a few of us talk about our pets!

Justforher - how scary. Hope you can get in to see a cardiologist quickly.

Got the CT for my knee today. Couldn't get an appointment with ortho until late in the month so expect it will be late April or May before I can have surgery. Hope it won't be the scheduling hassle the last one was - surgery didn't want to schedule until they had seen pro-ops and primary didn't want to schedule until I had a surgery date.

Be safe all of you in the storm path. And the west is going to be really hurting with a drought. We are breaking records for heat here and I fear for what the summer will be like.

Driveway clear enough for Vietnam Veterans donation pickup today. Already have it out by garage since front walkway is impassable still. It is solid ice so resistant to any attempts at removal. I had 1 kitchen trash bags, 3 bags of books and 3 cardboard boxes of mixed items to go. Feels liberating to let that stuff go and we threw out anything we did not want others to wear or use. So closets are done for now.

Birdfeeder is very busy with frequent visits from flocks of sparrows, juncos, cardinals, an occasional woodpecker, and blue jays. A very large four legged group of "birds" has been eating seed on the ground as well as the smashed pumpkins I have thrown out. I only have 2 pumpkins left though.

Read that the deer enter starvation mode this month due to burning up fat stores to try to stay warm and this weather has hastened the process. Their normal fare at this time of year is the tips of branches and brush. March can be their salvation or death knell because if they start to eat grass before their stomachs have acclimated to the "spring" acidity, they die with full bellies due to inability to process (acidosis) what they have eaten. They have it tough and it is truly survival of the fittest. I watch last spring's twins and hope they make it, though one is incrementally larger than the other. I saw one licking at the snow yesterday to get water. I am hoping stream is not frozen over because that is their closest water access.

It is expected to reach 30 degrees today, but it is overcast so we will not get the sun as we had yesterday. The sun does help with melt though as soon as the sun goes down, it freezes again.

Taco, I 'll send you some snow to offset your drought. I am hoping though, that all this ice, when it melts, will really fill the reservoir, so our summer doesn't result in a drought.

I spent several hours working on genealogy yesterday and started to print out data on each person in my lineage such as grandparents, great grands, parents, etc. I want to put it with the monologues I have written or each family as documentation for facts and sources. This will also provide focus and to let me see where the gaps are.

Still experiencing lingering effects from my cold and hope by next week it is gone. The cough is chest rattling and sounds worse than it is. I'll try to dust first floor today and see if DH can run vacuum for me.

Guess that's enough about my boring, winter existence.

cindyny, loved the story about SO's birthday mix-up and how everyone made the best of it.

carole, glad you are able to get out to exercise class. I know how much you enjoy them.

Justforher, do you have anything prescribed for anxiety? What you are going through right now is scary and it might be nice to have someone to talk to about what you are experiencing.

petite1, I hope your cabin neighbors can tell you what's going on in that neck of the woods. It seems NC got a really heavy snow blow.

Chris, hope the knitting is going well. Have you finished the mittens?

Sandy, hope you are or have enjoyed NO. Not sure if your visit is over yet.

harley07, how is the weather in Chicago area?

Hope everyone has a great day and waving "Hi" to everyone.

I just walked out to the street to retrieve the garbage can and check the mailbox. The sun is warm. I was comfortable in a tee shirt and cropped pants. The piece of mail holding me up from doing our tax return had been delivered. Before going inside, I visited dh in his workshop. He had a bowl with beautiful pattern in the wood in his lathe. We lamented that he wasn't playing golf on this perfect day for golf. I'm so hoping that the sciatica won't end his golfing.

In the early afternoon, I'll go for a walk. I also have to go to the Piggly Wiggly for milk, since I used the rest of dh's milk to make chocolate pudding. I have the slow cooker going with a pot roast that will be Italian beef, thanks to packet of seasoning. Eddy's, which I had to order since it's not available locally.

It's such a relief to have Louisiana winter back in progress. I can move my little collection of succulent plants back outside, hopefully for the rest of winter.

The essence of optimism is that it takes no account of the present, but it is a source of inspiration, of vitality and hope where others have resigned; it enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not to abandon it to his enemy.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Please post more often. We are getting more people with stage four, and our hearts are open in support.

I might do just that in a few months. I have done Aran stuff in the distant past. Sigh. But arthritis in my hands stopped me after several tries ten years ago. I had surgery on the base of my right thumb four months ago. At the end of the month, I am scheduled to have it done on my left thumb, so I will stop again for several months. Knitting super big projects for felting will cover many errors.

I cherish my Gram's crocheted doilies.

@teka

What a treasure those doilies are. Do you use them or display them in some way? My grandmother and great grandmother both made those.

@intolight

I've been following your treatment on another thread. Seems like you're handling it well. Fingers crossed for a good outcome. Don't you find that crocheting is calming? I think it would be awesome if cancer treatment centers offered lessons to patients. I'd be willing to help.

@mcbaker

Hope the thumb surgery goes well. I have arthritis in both thumbs (and many other bones!) for which I take celebrex. It works well. Oddly, even though I am right handed, my left thumb is more painful. Not surprised the Aran weight yarn was more difficult for your hands. I've attended two classes on ergonomics for knitters. In one of those classes the speaker talked about how using finer yarn like fingering or sport was much easier on aging hands.

@eleanora I brought a small crochet project with me to my first infusion, but since I ice my hands during the process I cannot crochet too. It has prevented the neuropathy so far so I shall continue. I could do it the first hour though… Perhaps I should think about it. I don't do doilies as I too have some antique ones from family and don't need more. I have been thinking of making everyone slippers for next Christmas. My MIL did that and everyone remembers her work. It would be good as they are small and I don't need a lot of directions.