Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?
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Hi Puffin, His neurologist did a series of hand exercises and then said no sign of Parkinson's. He's getting stooped and that probably throws off his balance. They said to start using a cane. He'll be 82 in Nov. He refuses to do any exercise. Walking sometimes gives him leg cramps the following night so he avoids it. He seems to be going downhill physically and I feel much younger than him. Of course I can't see me walking, so what do I know.
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I don't understand why so many people are "cane adverse." We both use them, especially when walking Mutz. Just adds a little stability and reassurance. In fact, seeing our canes sitting by the door is just another sign to me of our growing old together.
Have a good weekend, everyone.
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If I didn't have a cane, no way would I have been able to get out of bed and downstairs all this week. Yesterday was the first day I was able to keep the Rollator parked in a corner of the living room. My back is still stiff and sore, but no longer excruciating. I've kept a Leki "Wanderfreund" cane in my car for the past few years, just in case. I have a version that collapses to 24" and fits in the carry-on tote that slips over my rollaboard suitcase for when I fly. And I'm not ashamed to use it.
When Bob was having trouble with his knee, I offered him one of my canes--but he went straight for the shillelagh a friend brought back from Ireland. It's way too long for me (and of course non-adjustable as it's hand-carved from a single piece of wood) but just right for him. (My late FIL used it too, when he lived with us).
Was able to drive to Warby Parker today to get my new frames adjusted to sit level on my face; and get the new prescription put in some of my favorite existing frames. Until a couple of years ago, they would replace the lenses in any of their frames--you had to take them or send them in to the lab; but now they'll replace lenses only in frames that they still carry--in the same color. They simply have the lab make a new pair of that frame with the new prescription, and they knock off $50 and let you keep your old frames as backups. It's pricy but nowhere near as expensive as LensCrafters or Pearle. I used to like Zenni--but they will not update your lenses at all, and no optician around here is willing to touch their frames because they break so easily. So when everything comes in, I will have one pair each of progressive Transitions in purple tortoise and red ("Cardinal") crystal, one pair of sunglasses in clear ("Grapefruit Soda") crystal, and one pair of non-photochromic blue-light blocking progressives in teal ("Beach Glass") crystal, to wear late at night to cut down on eyestrain from screens. I decided not to update my readers, as the progressives have a large enough reading section. (I do love the "Viola Crystal" color of my readers' frames--which Warby no longer carries--and may take them to the indie optician in West Ridge to have my progressive prescription put in them to expand my glasses wardrobe). I have reached the age where visible eyeglass frames are more flattering than is concealer--especially when I take off my mask. At this point, there is no longer any concealer at any price that will fool anyone into thinking I don't have undereye bags or circles.
Happy is still very clingy but a bit more energetic--the prednisone is calming his gut somewhat. Jury is out on the new probiotic, though.
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The mystery of language was revealed to me.
I knew then that 'w-a-t-e-r' meant the wonderful
cool something that was flowing over my hand.
That living word awakened my soul, gave it light, joy, set it free!"— HELEN KELLER
"Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind."
— RUDYARD KIPLING
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Dh and I have canes. I only seemed to have needed mine during my 'broken' arm experience. I was termed un-steady on my feet by one of the physicians on my case, but frankly, I did not believe it and neither did my PCP who has seen me many, many times. I've done my best to slow down but that incident was my usual habit of doing things way too fast for my own good. That means I'm not in good communication with my surroundings and potential hazards. I learned a BIG lesson. Here's hoping it continues to stick.
Sandy, sure glad to hear you and kitties issues are much better. Hope you continue on to a long stretch of few problems and those that may come I hope are easily solvable. Sometimes those problems show us how 'good' we are at finding workable solutions.
Rain through the night. I don't think we had anything major really --- it likely mostly was over by the time we got up around 5 a.m. this morning. Could have more through the day, but I hope not. Had a call on Friday from my favorite people on the other side of town. Dr B and his wife. She fell and has a really rough serious ankle strain -- x-rays were all good, but lots of pain, swelling and difficulty getting around. She called and I immediately cleared my schedule and went over. She just cried and cried -- she is used to helping others, not needing help for her own medical issues. I didn't really know what to say. We ( many of us ) are aging together and it is not only hard to see people you care deeply about in distress, but also see a possible picture of yourself. I finally told her -- it is temporary and I will help you all I can to get through it as quickly and successfully as is possible. She cried more but it was different -- way less intense.
Nothing much planned for today, but I will return tomorrow and any day I'm needed and work anything else in between somehow and somewhere.
Hope you all have a really good Sunday.
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When my mom was 80 she was supposed to use a cane. I’d go to take her out some where and ask where is your cane. She’d hand it to me, ready to go. I’d laugh and tell her she is supposed to use it, I’m not supposed to carry it.
Myself with the hamstring surgery I went from walker, crutches, to cane. If I were to use one regularly I’d need a new one with a cushioned grip. The old one is wooden and my boney arthritic hand got sick of it quick.
Yesterday my niece, a gf and I went to a soap making class. A lot of fun! We each picked a different scented oil and all had different color picks. The soap has to cure so total unknown finished product. It will be interesting to see what we end up with. The owner also provided a goodie bag with 2 travel size samples of soap, a solid lotion bar, and a lip balm in ginger lim which is heavenly. Enjoy the day ladies!
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CindyNY: You could use a pool noodle to fashion a hand grip for your wooden cane. Given the length of a pool noodle, you would be good for quite a while for replacement grips.
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I was age >65 when I was diagnosed breast cancer stage-3; mastectomy done on affected breast; started Anastrozol this year; I have severe Osteoporosis; I feel over fatigue; my back is too sore that most of the time; I almost fainted.
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Hi Lovev7,
You have issues, we can give you lots of suggestions. Just being tired is quite difficult I do believe. I hope you will return if you need a listening ear, willing shoulder, and lots of suggestions and some good old fashioned friendship for the journey. BC.Org has many forums as well that address specific issues. Please feel free to come anytime and vent as much as needed.
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I think miracles occur. DH was told to quit driving and he has done so. Last night he sold his car to the friend who fixes things around the house for us. He was excited because there's plenty of room for his drums. This is a big load off me. We were all worried he would fight it to the death. DS said he could disable both cars. For some reason I didn't think that was a good idea. I wish we hadn't just gotten the new tabs. They aren't cheap even on older cars.
Welcome Lovev7, From what you wrote, I think you might consider using a walker for a while. When I hurt my hip earlier it was great. Much less likely to fall, and easier to use than a cane. I hope the fatigue is temporary. Post surgery has fatigue as does Arimdex.
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Wren, there are most definitely miracles. There is much help from the Universe which I was able to receive for more than one thing when Dh and I returned home to Illinois. We can feel so alone but never truly are and it is our blessing.
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I don't think anyone could ever feel alone on this forum. Whenever you need a helping hand, an empathetic ear or some kindness, you can find it here.
Today was my DSIL's birthday and we had a small family party. He got to pick where he wanted takeout from so we had a great meal from a local Italian restaurant, a delicious cake from Whole Foods and a good time. He loves Halloween so I try to find items that he would like to decorate with and he has a vast collection now. Today's gifts were a Halloween Pumpkin animated pumpkin with a cat popping out of it from Hallmark, Minnie Mouse and Mickey Mouse Halloween bobble figures that use solar power, and some spending money. He's easy to please.
This week is busy. Tomorrow is covid vaccine #3 and Covid test for surgery. Tuesday is ENT, Wednesday is prep day and then surgery on Thursday. Not looking forward to this adventure and have reached the point where I wish (not really) that someone else would hear God say, here, hold my beer.
Have a good week.
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Lovev7 - welcome. You've been through a lot in a short amount of time. For many of us, a BC diagnosis creates PSDT (I'm conscious of it was I am ticking off 5 year marks - this month return for a second mammogram). I hope you will talk to both your MO and your Primary about your concerns. A mental health professional could be in your cards too. I don't remember the fatigue from the arimedex but I sure was moody and had a very short fuse.
And come here. We are a relatively small group and share all kinds of things but the bottom line is there is love and support here for whatever life is throwing us.
Scheduled my Moderna booster for Wed. Now if I just didn't have to see the dental hygienist tomorrow!
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Just as gardeners cultivate their plots, keeping them free from weeds, and growing the flowers and fruits which they require, so may a person tend the garden of his or her mind, weeding out all the wrong, useless, and impure thoughts, and cultivating toward perfection the flowers and fruits of right, useful, and pure thoughts. By pursuing this process, a person sooner or later discovers that he or she is the master-gardener of his or her soul, the director of his or her life.
James Allen0 -
Our storm finally rolled in last night. Just poured and poured with lots of thunder, lightning and tornado warnings. SIL. Dh, and I went out before the storm to get a quick bite to eat. I was just too tired to cook. I took apart one side of my bed room and washed down the walls. Took up all the cobwebs and steam mopped the floors on that side a couple of times. It was well past time.
Windy and cold today -- about 76 before the storm. I don't think it will get much past 50 or 55 today. I will be returning to Dr. B's house to help assist with the everyday chores and anything that needs attention. Good to have something to do right now as I still have car repairs in my future -- a module that attaches to my car tire is needed along with a stabilizer bar. Hoping that takes care of the lights as well as the ABS issue. I also need tires again. Last ones didn't last very long so I'm going to look for a different brand.
Glad you got your booster ( Moderna ) Taco. I am waiting for now as I just got a flu shot. Also, I haven't as yet been notified to get it. I think we will soon as November will make it 8 months since our first shots.
I hope you all have a good day.
More hugs to you Love 7 .
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Love7 welcome to the group. With the AI drugs some people have nothing, others have an array of side effects. The good, the bad and the ugly are discussed.
When my dad shouldn’t have been driving from macular degeneration I feared I’d be disowned when we told him he had to stop driving. Long story short he sold the car for a $1.00 to a cousin of mine who was having a hard time. She hit the jackpot and so did I.
I’m scheduled for Moderna booster on 11/1. Had to do it online for CVS and as I booked I actually thought it was for today. But as I text it to a friend I realized this Monday wasn’t 11/1. We leave 11/4 for Texas, so I’m hoping for limited side effects.
It’s been cooler and rains started late last night. And I’d guess that’s right when we realized 2 sunny days had past us and we better get ourselves in gear to get the AC unit out of the bedroom window. We had a garbage bag on the bed to lay it on and towels to dry it. The window is now closed until May 2022.
Monday Monday,enjoy the day!
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Love7, welcome aboard. You might want to consider a Rollator-type 3-or-4-wheel walker with folding seat and under-cushion storage pouch. You can buy them at drugstores & warehouse clubs. The standard aluminum 4-wheelers (tiny wheels) are very barebones. Back in the day when I had to use a non-wheeled walker after broken-leg surgery (hippity-hopping with it due to my being non-weightbearing was like bench-pressing my entire body weight), there was a disability-aids chain superstore from whose catalog I was able to order a bolt-on denim sling seat, fake-shearling handle-grip covers, and even clamp-on cupholders. The superstore is gone now (not even online) but I'm sure there are similar sites.
Cindy, your nearest sporting goods store or golf-course pro shop should have foam or padded leather "grip tape" (for wrapping & cushioning golf club or tennis-racket grips). Maybe even auto-parts stores stock it for wrapping steering wheels. If you are extremely patient, you can even pad the walker grips with cotton balls wrapped in duct tape. My third vaccine shot was Moderna--but a full, not the new half-strength "booster," dose. My side effects lasted less than 24 hrs.
Miserably raw, windy and wet yesterday afternoon into this morning--we're at a 2-day high right now of 52F. Despite getting almost 4" of rain, our basement didn't flood, and despite the 50mph wind gusts we didn't lose any of the green tomatoes still on the vine. All the herbs are still standing too. At least no frost here by the lake--though there have been 16-foot waves crashing over the seawalls, swamping the hiking/biking paths and even occasionally spilling over on to the shoulder of the NB lanes of Lake Shore Drive. I don't envy those living in the beachside condos with underground parking garages, nor the unlucky souls living along the beach whose backyards are getting ever smaller as the waters encroach. One neighborhood to the north, a light pole fell on a parked car, and a tree in Grant Park was uprooted.
Bob brought home dinner from Boston Market on the SW Side, but the drive through the storms was so long (traffic worse than usual) that it had to be nuked before we could enjoy it. More and more, he is my mealtime hunter-gatherer, though I am still the freezer-forager and grocery-gatherer. Been at least 6 mos. now that I haven't had to rely on Instacart or WF/Amazon Fresh for deliveries--dreading the upcoming winter days when snow will make that necessary again. I have finally conquered my early-pandemic-era compulsion to have a "spare" dozen eggs, milk bottle or loaf of low-carb bread in case we run out and I can't get more. I am slowly working my way through our freezers before buying any more fish or meat. (Two weeks now without ordering from Hooked on Fish; and I am choosing as long an interval as possible between Butcher Box shipments--might even suspend my subscription).
My back is stiffish and sore-ish but I can move without stooping or leaning, and I didn't need my painkillers (8-hr Tylenol + Aleve) this morning--just using heat and topicals. I may actually take a full shower tonight--haven't been able to safely step over the tub rim into the shower, so I've been sponge-bathing and using dry shampoo. Was considering getting my roots done tomorrow, but I don't think I can handle leaning back in the salon's shampoo chair yet. Dark roots are fashionable--but gray roots not so much.
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Very wet and windy here yesterday and today. Lots of people lost power and a couple was killed when a tree fell on their car. The road they were on is heavily forested and I would not have been driving there. Someone I know lost power and internet. Went to her ex husband's living room to get her work done. We live in a Scandinavian part of town and don't have big fir trees. Story is the Norwegians cut them down to build houses.
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Illusions command themselves to us because they save us pain and allow us to enjoy pleasure instead. We must therefore accept it without complaint when they sometimes collide with a bit of reality against which they are dashed to pieces. -Sigmund Freud
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Sunny today and though chilly it will be highly appreciated by me. Cleared my schedule so I can help again at Dr. B's. I think I might be likely to be there the rest of the week. I'll have Sunday off for sure so will go to the farm and do my friend's house then. Just wow !!!
Need to find some time to check up with my pcp on an issue that has come up lately. I think it has to do with the continual mold/pollen, and other Spring irritants. They have lasted all yr. and my nasal areas are highly aware. Lately, at night when I get up to go to the bath room I end up with super shallow breathing and twice have had to get up and go out to the living room recliner where I sleep the rest of the night -- after an interlude of working to catch my breath properly. I do think it has something to do with never having gotten the seasonal irritants down to a good level. Will have to try to fit in some sort of consultation/visit because it is not at all restful to have this happen.
I hope you all have a fine day.
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Feel better, Jackie!
Got Happy's bloodwork back & discussed it with his vet today. His liver enzymes are sky-high, but he is now also officially hyperthyroid. The latter can partly explain the former, but the liver numbers basically reflect an "energy deficit" (burning more calories than he absorbs)--still likely IBD. But the fact that he throws up only when he has hunger pangs, with no bits of undigested food in the vomitus, suggests that the intestinal lumen is not as thickened as the vet feared (his ultrasound 2 years ago was "inconclusive"). At his next appt. he will be tested for T4 levels, and we will discuss with the new vet (today's Dr. Funk's last day before she goes into human public health, her original focus) whether or not to do an ultrasound to see if there are any masses. The treatment is pretty much what we're doing now: palliative prednisone & lots of patience & love. At 14, it'd be cruel to put him through anything painful (and with his liver enzymes, anything requiring anesthesia is dangerous). I asked about pet-strength CBD, but the elevated liver enzymes suggest he might have trouble clearing it from his system.
Back is getting better, though not enough for any exercise other than therapeutic stretches and getting around the house. I waited till today before attempting to get into the shower this evening (still nervous about stepping over the tub wall) because I was waiting for the new hair treatments (Drybar's "Cure Liqueur" pre-wash oil, shampoo & conditioner) to arrive today. I am to use them every fourth shampoo to repair and prevent further damage from blow-drying & flatironing. Also bought a new silk satin pillowcase to replace the one that turned yellow in the wash and then got a jammed zipper. Anything to keep the frizzies at bay (short of a keratin treatment that releases dangerous fumes).
We are going to have to replace a perfectly good toilet (one for which we recently replaced the wax ring) because it is too fashionably low-slung for Bob to comfortably get onto & off (he needs to sit to "drop the deuce;" this is TMI, but men his age often have difficulty "keeping the back door closed" while peeing, so standing to pee can be a literal crapshoot). No room in that little downstairs bathroom for a frame with rails (or grab bars, his preference)--the linen closet doors & TP holder on one side and the sink on the other are too close to the throne. I showed Bob how, when my back was at its worst, how I used the sink rim and the linen-closet tiled wall corner to brace myself as I lowered on to the seat, and grabbed the bathroom door handles to pull myself up--but his reply was "too complicated, too hard." He has no problem getting onto the upstairs toilet (which is "comfort height"), other than it's upstairs and his knees can't get him up there fast enough when he gets home after a long drive in traffic. So there goes another half a grand...
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I could also buy a pair of "quad-canes" (four-pronged feet) to keep in the bathroom to function as de facto grab bars, but that would be too logical. And getting a new ADA-compliant toilet means also having to buy another Squatty-Potty "stool-stool" for me. He's a foot taller than I am, which has always made life (especially walking together) interesting.
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ChiSandy: Have you thought about just replacing the toilet seat with an elevated one? Most of them also have grab bars attached to them. You might still need a Squatty Potty for you but it has to be cheaper than replacing the entire toilet. There are so many options available there has to be something that would work in your smaller room.
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An elevated seat wouldn't work because it would have to be removed for the times when he simply wants to stand & pee, as well as whenever I or my HK have to flush the cat turds we scoop daily from their litter boxes. It has a smaller opening than an elongated bowl, so there's little "room for error" in aiming (standing or seated). And the elevated plastic seats are tougher to clean than porcelain, scratch easily & therefore retain stains/odors/germs, and don't have covers. We tried one for awhile back when I was recovering from tibial-fracture surgery, and it was a disaster.
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Once you know with abundant certainty that nothing can trouble you but your own imagination, you come to disregard your desires and fears, concepts and ideas, and live by truth alone. -Nisargadatta
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Sandy, So glad your back is going- albeit never fast enough when in pain- in the right direction, that HK is back, that Happy does seem happy, that you've made Thanksgiving plans and in the Signature Room with its beautiful Chicago views and gracious food. I've been stymied and depressed by Thanksgiving coming up. We always take the geographic cure which actually works this time of year for me. This would be on the 23rd, sometimes on Thanksgiving itself, my younger son's 57 th birthday. He died in 1989 of a ruptured aorta. Gil and I usually go to San Francisco for Thanksgiving- stay at the Fairmont, walk to the Embarcadero for movies, eat with my wonderful cousin every night at good restaurants and spend Thanksgiving at their friends’ home and Friday after at their home. But it seemed like too high a possible Covid dosing this year and also, Diane, a lyricist, has a musical being produced in December and, though she was insistent that she wanted us to come, I would feel guilty taking up her time right now. So to Plan B- but missing Plan A and all the Thanksgivings past, which I didn’t particularly enjoy, but would give almost anything to once again see family members who are gone. Plan B is the Kohler - bathrooms- Resort in Wisconsin, their American Club- which is lovely. We’ll go on Tuesday, come back on Friday. This will also be a very welcome respite for waking up at 5:30, going on the elliptical for an hour and taking a long walk every day to get to the non- magical 10,000 steps. Plus their rooms and bathrooms really are lovely.
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Sandy, glad you’re headed in the right direction.
Keywest, sorry for the loss of your son so young. Thanksgiving always throws me. After the loss of both parents we tried keeping the Thanksgiving gathering the same. It’s dwindled to nothing. Enjoy your Kohler Resort. Changing scenery with great amenities can help get thorough these times.
I saw my MO yesterday, regular 6 month check. I now switch off with her PA, but yesterday was w the dr. I asked if or when I’d get the breast cancer index test. She asked if PA mentioned it, she had back in May. MO looked at my cancer, size, stage, grade, onco score and said I’ll be done at 5 years. Made me happy but later I wondered why not bother to test. I haven’t kept up with latest studies but she seemed to think newer ones were out and I’d be fine. So happy dance scheduled for March 1, 2023. 🤷♀️
Weather has been cooler, but no rain today. A gf & I are taking the train into NYC on Saturday to see a play and grab dinner before heading back home. I know it’s a lot of money for a day trip, but we’ve decided not to bother with Christmas gifts this year. We were spending $100+ on each other but we truly don’t need anything so it’s a treat for each of us under the guise of Christmas! Unfortunately we will need to bring umbrellas. We will still have a great time and great food too.
Dentist tomorrow for cleaning. My mom would have said no rest for the wicked!
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Judy, the American Club at Kohler is indeed wonderful--the spa is even better than the bathrooms. And I remember the restaurant was outstanding. You might want to reconsider SF soon, as their COVID metrics are plummeting (but the mask mandates are still in place), even lower than Chicago's. The plane ride would be the only bummer--masked for 3-1/2 hours in the air, plus in the airports & cabs would not be fun.
Cindy, have fun in NYC!
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Sounds like a fun day, Cindy. And who needs more stuff at our age!
Keywestern, I always have trouble between March and May - our son's death and birth dates. Doesn't help that Mother's Day comes in there too. Plan B sounds pretty good though.
Thanksgiving has never been as good as it was when I was a child and we went to my aunt's. Lots of cousins and great memories.
I will be sad because it will mark two years since we have seen our DD. Had planned to go for her birthday in Aug. until Ken's bowel obstruction and Delta struck. I'm also really starting to have 5 year BC diagnosis flashbacks. Bioposy came back Thanksgiving week and surgery Dec. 23rd.
We'll have dinner here with our couple "buddies." Ken already bought the turkey as he saw a small one and we have been warned by my food bank connections that they will be hard to find and expensive. I'm not usually the cook in our house but do love to do the family recipes. We like the leftovers but not 20 lbs. worth. Larry will probably bring some kind of decadent pie.
Pifzer booster done! Had to make two trips to Safeway as I forgot to take my shot record. So far, no SE's. See how I feel in the morning. I hope to golf. Weather is perfect right now.
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I got a shot in each arm today. My thumbs are all messed up from riding my bicycle. I am trying to be kind to them, but do you know how important thumbs are? Yes, I am waiting for OT to call me for an appointment.
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