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The Passing of Lindaa

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DHofLindaa
DHofLindaa Member Posts: 4
edited June 2014 in May Their Memory Live On

On June 14. 2011 my beloved wife Linda passed away at home, one year to the day after her diagnosis. She posted here as Lindaa and during her treatment she requested that I post here if she passed.  Her path was not easy as we went from chemo to chemo to clinical trial to palliative care without finding anything that would work on her triple negative IBC. Throughout her repeated hospitalizations and numerous procedures required to battle the progression and even after three separate oncologists declined to treat her further she remained uncomplaining and fought until the end.   This past year has been a lesson in courage that I still cannot fully comprehend.  She
wanted me to pass on to those of you here to remain positive, treasure every day and to keep fighting despite the odds. Even after she took her last ride home from the hospital in an ambulance she still wanted to go back for radiation to combat a brain met even though she had become too weak to get out of bed unassisted.   The gift of courage that she left us will be a lasting legacy to all who knew her. 

Linda's DH

Comments

  • chrissyb
    chrissyb Member Posts: 11,438
    edited June 2011
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    Thank you for posting this sad news.  My condolences to you and your family and those who were close to her.   She will be missed by many.

    Chrissy

  • jelson
    jelson Member Posts: 622
    edited June 2011
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    DH of Lindaa Thank you for thinking of us and sharing Linda's words of inspiration. She did fight so very hard. Take care of your self.

    Julie E

  • heidihill
    heidihill Member Posts: 1,856
    edited June 2011
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    Thank you for letting us know. My condolences to you and your family.

  • barbaraa
    barbaraa Member Posts: 3,548
    edited June 2011
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    I am so very sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace.

  • thats-life-
    thats-life- Member Posts: 169
    edited June 2011
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    please accept my deepest sympathy.

  • Letlet
    Letlet Member Posts: 55
    edited June 2011
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    I am so sorry. She was a strong and courageous woman. Thank you for sharing her story as we are all sisters in this fight.

  • DHofLindaa
    DHofLindaa Member Posts: 4
    edited June 2011
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    Thanks to all for the condolences.  Linda took it hard when she read posts of others passing as she was always concerned for others before herself.  You all have my utmost admiration for standing up to this horrible disease and coming here to share your stories or gain strength from others during your trials.  This board proved to be an invaluable resource for Linda because of all I tried to do for her I could not share the perspectives of someone fighting the same battle.  She would often relate stories here of your struggles with oncs or insurance as well as take joy and encouragement from survivors and women whose treatments were working.  She continued to read here for as long as she was interested in the internet but posted less and less, as when she had no good news to share she tended to withdraw so as not to be a burden.   I thank you all for not onlly the support now but for what she received from you while she was here.

  • Leah_S
    Leah_S Member Posts: 1,929
    edited June 2011
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    I am so sorry to hear about your painful loss. We will all miss Lindaa. May G-d send you comfort.

    Leah

  • desdemona222b
    desdemona222b Member Posts: 90
    edited June 2011
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    Oh no - so sorry to hear about your loss.  Your wife will be missed.

  • sincitydealer
    sincitydealer Member Posts: 51
    edited June 2011
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    I am so very sorry for your loss.  I know this must be so tough for you, and you will miss your wife with all your heart.

    Peggy

  • celia088
    celia088 Member Posts: 975
    edited June 2011
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    DHofLindaa, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear wife, Linda.  My condolences go out to you and your family and friends.  Linda's name has been added to the List of Angels.

    celia 

  • FireKracker
    FireKracker Member Posts: 5,858
    edited June 2011
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    I am soooo sad to hear this news.RIP Lindaa.Im prayin for you DH  for strength.Thanks for letting us know.
  • dlb823
    dlb823 Member Posts: 2,701
    edited June 2011
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    This is heartbreaking news.  I'm so sorry for your loss.    Deanna

  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 1,568
    edited June 2011
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    May she rest in peace. I am so sorry. God will give your family the same strength and courage she had to get you through this most difficult time. I know you miss her; we do too. Thank you for taking the time to tell us. We are all praying for you and your family. diane

  • debbie6122
    debbie6122 Member Posts: 2,935
    edited June 2011
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    My deepest condolances, she will be missed, (((((((hugs)))))))))

  • apple
    apple Member Posts: 1,466
    edited June 2011
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    I'm so sorry you lost her.

    My deepest condolences.

  • lwd
    lwd Member Posts: 234
    edited June 2011
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    I'm so sorry to hear this.  My condolences to you and your family.  Thank you for letting us know.

    Lane

  • 3monstmama
    3monstmama Member Posts: 123
    edited June 2011
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    I'm so sorry for your loss. 

  • susan_02143
    susan_02143 Member Posts: 2,394
    edited June 2011
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    Just found this post tucked here... Oh, I am so sorry for your loss. Lindaa was a fighter. Didn't she threaten to go to Peru to try a treatment that had been blocked by the FDA?

    Thank you for letting us know,

    *susan* 

  • mrsnjband
    mrsnjband Member Posts: 64
    edited June 2011
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    So sorry to hear about the passing of your DW.  I too have IBC, triple-neg so it is hitting my hard that she is gone so soon.  

    Sending love & prayers to your family. NJ 

  • DHofLindaa
    DHofLindaa Member Posts: 4
    edited June 2011
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    Linda would have gone to Peru or anywhere else if there was the chance at an alternative treatment.  Alternative therapies was one of her great frustrations.  We moved her treatment to Dana Farber last December and they did not have much in the way of alternatives.  Besides the first round of Taxol/Avastin/Carboplatin she was treated with A/C, Ixempra and Gemzar + a Merck clinical trial drug.  When the scans showed progression after the second week of the trial she was removed and told we needed to resolve tumors on her kidney and a brain met and then her onc would consider Eribulin.  At that point we went doctor shopping locally and got the same determination from one of the best locally recommended oncs we could find.  She contacted MD Anderson but was too weak to make the trip to Houston. The last onc we went to was at an MD Anderson affiliated hospital although so far I can't figure out how the affiliation thing works or how useful it is.  The kidneys took three separate hospitalizations to resolve and by her last discharge she had become too weak from deconditioning in the hospital and progression to be able to do radiation for the brain met.  She passed 10 days after going into home hospice. Apologies if this is TMI but I think she would have wanted you all to know if it can be of any help. @Norma June: In Linda's research she found only three places that advertise any speciality in IBC: MD Anderson, Sloan Kettering and Dana Farber.   

  • chrissyb
    chrissyb Member Posts: 11,438
    edited June 2011
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    DHofLindaa the information you give is never too much.  We are always open for as much information as possible.  Thank you.

    Love n hugs.  Chrissy

  • susan_02143
    susan_02143 Member Posts: 2,394
    edited June 2011
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    Not to much information DH. Lindaa was our friend; we cared and her fight is part of us now. Please come back as often as it is helpful to you.

    *susan* 

  • DHofLindaa
    DHofLindaa Member Posts: 4
    edited June 2011
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    I thank you all for the thoughts and prayers.  Little by little I find the tiny memories of our life together and may some day come to peace with this unplanned ending of our lives.  I know I must go on as it is what she would want but most days that is all that gets me through.  I am thankful for the foresight to have told her I loved her every single day as she declined and beside myself for not having done it every single day we were together.  Please treasure the small moments that you have for in the end they are the most precious of all.

  • Suze35
    Suze35 Member Posts: 559
    edited June 2011
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    I am so sorry to hear this sad news.  My thoughts are with you and your family.

  • foobs
    foobs Member Posts: 21
    edited June 2011
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    To Lindaa's Dear Hubby

    It is clear how much you love(d) her and always will.  Because I'm a survivor and because I have a husband that was/is indescribably supportive of me, I must tell you that I know she knew how much she had in you.  And your love was her biggest help.

  • Babs37
    Babs37 Member Posts: 320
    edited June 2011
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    So sad to here the bad news.My deepest sympathy to her family.

  • celticsgirl143
    celticsgirl143 Member Posts: 1
    edited June 2011
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    I'm so very sorry for you and your family's loss, Linda was such a fighter we were all lucky to have her

  • chainsawz
    chainsawz Member Posts: 113
    edited June 2011
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    Thank you so much for posting about your dear wife...she will be missed.  Comfort and strength to you and your family...

  • sweetangel
    sweetangel Member Posts: 38
    edited June 2011
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    I am so sorry for your loss.  Prayers for you and your family.