Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
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Mellang - here's hoping you have already let out a big sigh of relief as you get your first mammo behind you. We're with you on this journey.
Law193 - I can't answer to the effects 4 months out. Not there yet. But I thought the odds of your wanting to get your dress soon, instead of waiting till the last minute I thought possibly the fix would be to get the dress you want (nice that bridesmaid is open your picking). I would treat the dress selection as you would normally. If the radiated breast is showing some shrinkage by then, there are cosmetic fillers you could use to somewhat build up illusion of matching the other girl.
Another idea comes to mind is the use of tape if looking for support if off the shoulder or low back dress is preferred. I have a good friend that had lung surgery the same time I had my surgery. We compared notes constantly. Her problem was she could not wear a bra at all as the long incision on her side were troublesome. She complained about her one breast aching. Similar to ours from movement and or fabric irritating it. I suggested the cosmetic tape to support her breast and we tried to find some in a few clothing stores. They knew what we were asking for but did not stock it. So I chuckled and said well I just need you to use the tape I use for my bandages. I mentioned it in an earlier post. Its not the normal tape you purchase retail, only place we could get is through medical supply. Its two inches wide, not as sticky and has perforation, so it allows your skin to breath somewhat. Its called Medipore by 3M. She loved it. It provides the support she needed and its much, much easier to remove. And the gauze I suggested earlier might work also to protect your SN incision as its really a sponge like material. Cushy instead of scratchy. (high absorbency sponge, McKesson Medi-Pak Performance Plus)
I think how GREAT it would be to get dressed up and put the medical issues behind for a bit. I SO hope you will post a pic of THE dress. Its so hard to think beyond our treatment sometimes. I know I have been in the one day at a time mode for some time. I have a feeling you are going to find the perfect dress and figure out a way for it to work. You deserve it!
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First followup mamo, not as bad as I anticipated; just a little discomfort. The best part is I didn't need the ultrasound that was also scheduled because they didn't find anything they needed to look at closer. Thank God! Sometimes we are our worst enemy, always fearing the worst.
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mellang - Alright! Not sure when my 1st post lumpectomy mammo will be - Have been told BS will schedule it & not seeing BS until July. Thanks for the encouragement.
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Barbmak - Want to also wish you a welcome to this topic. You shed those tears if you need to - they are cathartic. Plenty of tears shed early into the journey on my part - whatever helps you through. Hope you always feel that you can "talk" to us. Someone is bound to have had the same or similar experience/feelings and we are here to help. Uplifting thoughts going out to you.
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~Gardennerd~
I know exactly what you mean about holding onto the sore breast! I am large as well and found myself 'holding' my lady whenever I walked because the movement was uncomfortable. When I went back to work, I told the women (& one guy) that I may unconsciously hold my breast because of discomfort or habit and to please draw my attention to it. One of the female co-workers made a suggestion that helped. She suggested I make a habit of placing my hand on base of my throat. That way my arm lay across my breast and still cushioned it. It helped and didn't take long to make it a habit. But the best thing I found was my breast form. I got it free from awesomebreastform.org0 -
TexasLadyand Barbmak: Welcome! Nice to meet you,too bad it's not under better circumstances.
Interesting about the nails....about 2 years ago, my nails started to pull away from the finger, so that the nail white appeared really wide...this is hard to explain. AND I got noticable vertical ridges and dips and valleys. Forgot what the PCP called it, but didn't really prescribe anything. Seems to happen more in winter. Makes you wonder if it does have any connection because when I read up on it, it did say it could be an indication of heart disease and cancer!!!
I got a handmade bag with lots of information when I went to see the nurse navigator the first time. In there was a small pillow. I used it once or twice after the second surgery, but have not needed it otherwise. But I have it should I need it toward the end of February. Both the bag and pillow were hand made.
I would often have to hold up my breast or push my right arm into it. A week after my re-excision surgery, I had a dental appointment and when they laid me back, it hurt!!! But if I held onto my right wrist with my left hand and pulled until my breast was supported, it was ok.
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Mellang, YAY, great news! Celebrating with you
I'm almost a year post rads and I don't think my breast size has changed much. But I think my tumor was on the smaller size and closer to chest wall so maybe not as noticeable externally.
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@law. I am 18 months post final rads and my radiated breast is larger than my no rads breast by about a cup size. It has been larger for most of the time. I keep expecting it to shrink but it's not. And the texture changes. It is like a grapefruit where the non radiated one is like a water balloon. I'd say just start looking. I don't think it will change that much over the next 4 months. Enjoy.0
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Welcome Barmack! Poodles, I am so sorry about your mom. I do hope that she goes painlessly. Praying for you.
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Molly, so far Mother's condition has been painless (end stage kidney failure and stage 4 kidney/liver cancer.) Her two big issues are fatigue and occasional confusion. Everything exhausts her. They had a fire drill on Fri afternoon. Thankfully, my sister and i were with her and took her out in her wheelchair. Mother got very scared and upset, saying over and over "what would I do if I was by myself? I'd burn up!" Of course, the staff was going around making sure residents could get out, or taking them out. But Mother didnt know that. Even after the event was over she continued to worry about burning up. It must be so frightening to know that you can't protect yourself. She was completely worn out the Sat, Sun, and Mon.
Peggy, the legal issues with mother's house still stand. She doesn't have title and her husband's will is still a mess. At this point we are going to let it ride. Mother becomes upset whenever the house is mentioned. She keeps wanting to come over there "to go through her things." That's a big fat nope! Not only is the house cluttered, i do not think she could even tolerate the trip one hour each way. And then there is the issue of getting her into and out of the car and into her wheelchair. Thankfully, most of the time Mother doesn't think about her house. Only if you mention it--my lips are sealed!
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HI, how is everyone doing. This is such an active board. Sorry everyone has to be here but if we have to be here we might as well be here with a great bunch of gals!!
Is anyone else here on Tamoxifen? I have been on it- then Arimidex- Femara and now back to Tamoxifen only this MO doubled my dosage. I was put into surgical menaupase so that is why I tried the Ai's but back to Tamoxifen and the new MO I have doubled my dosage. I am so wanting to stay on this one and I had minimal side effects from it before. Confusing!!
I had my lumpectomy in 2013, followed by internal radiation and umpteen tests but the thought of getting a Mammo still scares me! My BC was found on my first ever mammo and I had no reason to believe anything was wrong- I could not feel anything. My first after treatment was the worst, I was scared it would hurt I guess- but the thought of it being found again sure can play with a persons mind.
When do we get to forget this, or when does all this finally get put to the back of the mind?
Sorry wanted to vent a bit. Thanks everyone - This board has always been great to me and for me and I had wished I had found it from day one.
A gal on here told the minister about this site and had him pass on the info and I will forever be grateful to her 0 -
ndgrrl, I've been on 20mg/day Tamoxifen for almost a year with no noticeable se's. I'm still premenopausal. I asked my MO at the beginning if she would would switch me when I went into menopause. She said she would probably leave me on the Tamoxifen. I hope you have minimal se's. I've had 2 mammos post BC, and I don't rest easy until it's over and I get the good report. I didn't rest easy until I got the results of my annual pap back. Probably will subconsciously worry about any medical test from this point forward.
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Mustlovepoodles - No doubt your Mom's house provides somewhat a diversion for you and your siblings. Prayers for each of you. From my experience the best you can do is to make sure Mom is comfortable and to be her advocate to get that, if needed. Don't forget the caretakers need care too. In other words, please take care of yourself too.
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Thanks, Gardennerd. I must admit that I look forward to going back to the house at the end of the day. It's very quiet here because there's no TV, no radio, and no internet. That may sound hellish but it's actually very calming.
One really great thing is that my sister brought three little orphan kittens with her when she came down last week. She bottle-fed them for the first week but now they're lapping up kitten food. They walk all through their dish and sometimes even lie down in it. Needless to say they're getting a bath about 3 times a day. These babies are growing and tumbling and playing and generally being the cutest things you've ever seen. They have been such a great diversion for my mother. We take them over there every morning and she basically spend the day lying on the couch with the three kittens walking over her or snuggling under her blanket with her. Nothing else has lifted her spirits like these baby kitties.
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ParisParis - I'm glad to hear your incisions stopped hurting - that gives me hope!
Blooming: Thanks for your encouragement about picking out a dress. I was intrigued by your tape idea but couldn't picture how that actually works, so I googled it. Here is a link if anyone is interested: http://bratag.com/boob-tape/
I'm not sure I would do it though. Seems like it could go wrong too easily. And it sounds itchy although maybe I'm just itchy from radiation now so everything sounds itchy.
My surgeon told my boyfriend right after surgery that she had to take a lot out cause I had so many calcifications so it wasn't going to be great cosmetically. I thought it looked fine but she warned me that was because of the seroma which would eventually reabsorb. I guess I was trying to find out how long it takes for that to happen but of course it varies from person to person.
Those of you talking about walking around holding your breast - I can relate. I have been doing that too. Hopefully not at work but I'm tired enough sometimes that I probably have without realizing it.
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I just remembered another story about "holding my breast"! We are having extensive construction of Main Street...yes THE main street through town which you have to drive going just about anywhere in town. It has been SO bad with HUGE potholes and bumps and gravel and rocks that I HAD to hold my breast tightly or it hurt like heck. Fortunately, not having to do that anymore, just because I'm healed now, not because the road is any better, unfortunately.
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Nancy, The road to the hospital is so torn up, that I pointed that out to my husband last week! Roads are worse here in the Midwest I guess due to winters that they don't get in the South. I get it!
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Poodles, I sure as heck wasn't suggesting you bringing up the legal issues surrounding your mom's house to her. OMG! I can't imagine what kind of mess that would create. I wouldn't mention the house at all to her either! I'm so glad that the kittens are bringing such joy to your mom and all of you. Small things matter. Great progress on clearing out the house. That's wonderful. The legal issues will resolve one way or another and there's no sense in worrying about them now. Peace to all of you and many hugs.
HUGS!
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So I got a call from my BS. I told her I was worried if she called, that would be more surgery! She said that the tumor board had very differing opinions but all agreed that they want me to start chemo next Friday as planned. Once I complete the protocol projected, she is going to take more lymph nodes. It will be in the same incision, yet bigger and with a drain. Rats. I wasn't even thinking they would wait and do it. Then I will wait again 4 weeks approximately and have the radiation. This cancer. I had a few quick tears, but I thought I am ready in my mind to start the chemo, so I will just focus on surviving that for now.
One thing at a time. If I had not presented with 6/7 cancerous nodes, she would be ok without taking more. They just agreed that if there is one cancerous cell floating around in the body, beginning the chemo now is the best course of action.
God's got a purpose in this. Not sure what it is yet, but I will do my best to not question Him too much.
Is there a way to turn on a spellcheck? I notice I make lots of errors when I type quickly.
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Kim, at least you have a plan and know when it starts. I find indecision is harder to cope with than knowing what's ahead. Just remember my DIL's mantra: each chemo session she said KILL CANCER. She also said it's doable, definitely not fun but doable. I'm just sorry you have to go through it. Take care.
HUGS!
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Mustlovepoodles - That is so cool that your mom is enjoying those kittens. I would admit if someone asked if they could do that (bring kittens) to an elderly home, I would think it would be too much. Mostly because they are babies and hard to contain. Your description of how much your mom has enjoyed them is certainly proving my gut feeling is not always right. No doubt, she AND the kittens are loving the attention. This is good stuff.
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Kim- I agree with Peggy, having a plan is better then not knowing. And although the board has differing opinions it is good to know that they all agreed on the next course of action. And it does sound like the best way to proceed. No doubt it was a hard phone conversation. A friend told me once her Momma used to tell her that when things were rough, to pull up her bootstraps. And she told me recently in her dealings with cancer (lung) that she is reminded of what her Momma would tell her. And she shared with me, " Dang it, I've pulled those bootstraps up so far they are up around my ears". You've got this and when you need the help we are all here to help pull those boot straps up for ya. Take care of the vessel that God gave you in the best way you can and he will take care of you.
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Kim, it sounds as though your doctors have a good plan in place...it's not the one ANYONE wants, but a plan is GOOD! And yes, just tell yourself you ARE going to kick cancer's butt! With God's help, you'll get through.
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Kim, maybe not exactly what you wanted to hear, but at least you can start moving forward. Sending prayers and positive energy. Hugs!
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I’m 18 months out from rads, and my radiated breast looks more normal (round, perkier, nipple facing forward, although a cup size smaller) than my healthy one (which resembles a sock filled with not-yet-set Jello). My mammo is at the end of the month, and I think the seroma has shrunk as much as it’s going to.
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Hi - This is my first post and I must admit it feels kind of trivial compared to what others have been though and are going through. I had my lumpectomy yesterday and it all seems to have gone as well as possible; however, it hurt a bit more than I expected (to be fair I was probably being very unrealistic in my pain level expectations). I am large breasted so the pain doesn't seem so surprising now based on what I have read in some of the posts on this board.
So after I texted my friends and coworkers that the surgery went well but that I had some pain yesterday, (I was actually in a lot of pain and nausea at that point as we drove an hour through construction and traffic over many potholes and other road condition miseries the entire way home.) I was surprised at how many people texted back "you should take tomorrow off and rest" as though I'd be right back at work the next day and had just had a mole removed. The comments made me feel bad as though they considered this no big thing or that I was being whiny or something. Admittedly I tend to be an overly sensitive person and am probably being too sensible about this. (I don't think it helped that one of the comments was from someone who had a mastectomy 9 yrs ago and another comment came from someone who had ACL knee surgery this year and was out a couple of weeks.) I was planning on taking FMLA/sick time for the rest of this week. I have a desk job but it's been very stressful this year. Do most lumpectomy patients just take a couple days off?
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LoungeKat, I'm heading over to the hospital now for my lumpectomy..I have a lot of sick time that I can use so I am taking 2 weeks off for the surgery....then I will take more time if/when I am able to do the 2 x a day radiation as I can't work and go to radiation twice a day- but that's only for 5 days. Let's stay in touch. I was very surprised how much pain I was in just from the biopsies on both breasts- so I expect that this will be painful also for a while...time to take care of us...don't worry about what other people think...take your FMLA and recuperate. Good luck.
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LoungeKat - Welcome to the forum. Time off from lumpectomy varies. I took three weeks, which is probably the long side. I had lumpectomy and excision of a benign lesion and my radiation treatment (brachytherapy). I go back to work today. If I didn't have a physical job and worked at a desk that was not stressful, then possibly I would have gone back sooner. I cannot imagine any scenario where I would have gone back in a couple of days. My surgery incisions are healed up now but I still have a small incision from the brachytherapy that has not quit healed under my breast. And no doubt there is a lot of healing still going on inside the breast.
Don't let those that belittle the surgery confuse you. KB870 said it already, but it is true . . .when you see your medical papers it will say you had a partial mastectomy. Nausea may have been from anesthesia or pain meds. So I hope you are past that now. I stopped pain medicine and went to Tylenol immediately as I did not like the feeling from pain meds. And gradually the Tylenol went from as often as I could take to occasional. I used ice packs ALOT and pretty much for two weeks. In retrospect I think the ice was more comforting because of the balloon inside me for radiation as the discomfort level diminished a lot once I finished my radiation treatment and the balloon was out. I guess what I am saying is we are all different.
For me I was capable of doing a lot around the house BUT I could not wear a supportive bra and my breast did not like to be jostled around. And my girl didn't like me lying down as she hurt if she rolled to one side or the other. So I did a lot of sitting in a recliner, armed propped up away from body and ice packs.
I planned on two weeks. One week surgery and second for my radiation treatment. It became clear during second week, since I wasn't able to wear a supportive bra yet that a third week would be needed. And even if I could have managed somehow to get in a supportive bra, I'm glad I took the third week to allow for additional healing as even now my SN incision area is very tender. But I also have very good benefits at work and do not have to stress over needing to return to early.
Kat, you are your best advocate. I'm thinking if work is stressful, and you can afford the time off then don't push yourself to return to early. Stress is not a good healer, you need to allow your body time to recoup.
Barbmak - Our thoughts are with you today.
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The other piece of it, Kat, is the fatigue you may feel - from the anesthesia, from healing. I found myself napping frequently in the first few days after my surgery - that would be the time you were planning to take off.
Many people confuse a lumpectomy with a biopsy. One woman I know reminds me every time I see her that she had several of "what you had" but they were benign. That's why partial mastectomy is more accurate.
Give yourself time to rest and to heal. Don't make the mistake of doing too much because you start to feel like yourself. This is the time to pamper yourself a bit!
Best of luck as you heal. You came to the right place - this is a great forum. There are many wise women here who have helped me.
MJ
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Lounge cat - I was on sick leave for three weeks following my lumpectomy (which was oncoplastic surgery with reduction and lift, meaning two very large incisions and the nipple moved) and SNB, but I live in Europe and it is easier for us, although I was quite unlucky in that I had recently started a new job and had not acquired the right to full sick pay yet. The hospital recommended three weeks - to start with I took only two (for financial reasons) and I think I would have been perfectly fine with them (never needed to take more than paracetamol) but I developed a huge seroma in my armpit, which was really unpleasant and painful, so I added another week. I think pain levels are very individual and something that is not a problem for one person can be nightmare for another.
Barbmak - I hope everything will go well!
ChiSandy - when you had your lumpectomy, did they not recommend oncoplastic surgery to prevent ending up with two quite different boobs? My BS and PS said that I could get away with an excision (I have fairly large breasts, or rather, I had, for the time being I have one large one and one mid-sized one) but they would not recommend it as after the radiation the boobs would look quite different, an effect to get worse with age: radiated breasts do not change after the tissue has settled, whereas the other one would get older and saggier...
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