Second Opinion

[Deleted User]
[Deleted User] Member Posts: 3
edited January 2022 in Just Diagnosed

I've been having some real challenges with my MO. I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer (invasive ductal carcinoma, grade 3, 3.8 cm, 1 lymph node positive). My mastectomy was November 20th. So far I have only seen my MO once. She was condescending, and rushed my questions. I was supposed to have appointment this week but she postponed it, telling me there was no rush in my treatment. I found a second lump on my surgery site this week and was freaking out. I called my MO and she did not return my call that day (I mentioned the lump on the voicemail and to her secretary). I later received a phone call later from her secretary who said she would call me the next day, but she never did. Finally after a few voicemails and conversations with her secretary, she called me back three days later. I am very concerned with the quality of care (especially given the grade 3, and tumour size) and was wondering if I should get a second opinion. I am wondering if anyone has had any experience with this and has any recommendations of where to go (I will literally go anywhere!).

Comments

  • exbrnxgrl
    exbrnxgrl Member Posts: 5,315
    edited January 2022

    I am pretty firm in the belief that if you are feeling less than comfortable with any medical provider you should not only seek a second opinion but you should be seeking a new mo. Feeling respected and cared about by your mo is very important because you are the ultimate boss of your care team. Take care.

  • minustwo
    minustwo Member Posts: 13,389
    edited January 2022

    I agree - if you are not comfortable with any doctor, you should find someone else.

  • rah2464
    rah2464 Member Posts: 1,192
    edited January 2022

    Agreed on finding a different MO. Communication should be simple, effective, and responsive. Hope you find someone that you feel is more focused on you.

  • typhoon
    typhoon Member Posts: 59
    edited January 2022

    Definitely agree that you should find a new MO - I wouldn't want to rely on someone as unresponsive as your current MO. Regarding the second lump, have you talked to the breast surgeon who did the mastectomy? S/he would probably be the better person to determine whether the second lump needs further investigation. Your breast surgeon might also be able to recommend other oncologists. If you had reconstruction, you might also want to talk to the plastic surgeon who did the reconstruction. I say this because I thought that I found a new lump about a month after my surgery, raised the issue during a follow up appointment with the plastic surgeon, and it turned out to be one of the internal stitches from my reconstruction. It went away after a couple of months.

    I'm so sorry you are dealing with this right now, and hope you are able to find the right MO for your situation.

    (ETA - Just saw that you have another thread going on the lump issue, and that others have made comments similar to mine. Apologies for being repetitive!)

  • threetree
    threetree Member Posts: 1,823
    edited January 2022

    I agree with Typhoon. You might want to consider a new oncologist for sure, but I too would check with the surgeon. If I was in your situation, my surgeon would have actually been my first stop re that second lump. Overall, I have found my surgeon's office much more helpful and responsive than the oncologists office. My surgeon did my biopsy, arranged all the scans, referred me to the oncologist (who I'm not crazy about, but continue for routine things), and they were the ones who initially noted my lymphedema and immediately referred me for treatment. (The people at the oncologists office simply reacted with an "oh" after I showed them my swollen lymphedema arm.) They continue to be my "go to" office for not only the lymphedema OT/PT referrals, but for anything that comes up that might look suspicious and more. Check with your surgeon for sure!

  • mle42
    mle42 Member Posts: 124
    edited January 2022

    Also no reason to limit yourself to just one second opinion! I hated the first MO I saw at my local medical system (and had serious problems with the surgeon there dropping the ball as well), so set up appointments with MedOnc and SurgOnc doctors at two big teaching hospitals on back to back days. It was an exhausting couple of days but afterwards I felt like I had choices and was able to quickly move forward with the hospital/docs that were the best fit for me. I live in a rural area and t was worth it to me to travel (~3hr drive) for doctors that I felt would give me better care.

  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 185
    edited January 2022

    hello sweetie I would definitely get a 2nd opinion with the was m o treating of your concerns. I had a wonderful oncologist but got 2nd opinion. Mastectomy was suggested even though I was thinking lumpectomy cause we were planning our 2nd marriages at diagnosis but decided for mastectomy then fiance agreed to go with madtectomy. Praise God I am a 27yr Survivor 28 this yr. So yes get 2nd opinion ..msphil idc stage2 0/3 nodes 3mo chemo before and after Lmast then we got married Thank God then 7 wks rads then 5 yrs on Tamoxifen Chris in adriamycin 5fu. Hang in there.

  • pattik
    pattik Member Posts: 5
    edited January 2022

    I fired my first MO for very similar reasons. No call backs, no responses in patient portal, no sense of urgency, etc. I was choosing to have chemo based on my Oncotype, and it's recommended to start that no later than 90 days after surgery, though my current MO and cancer center pushes within 60 days. I was losing too much time staying with the original MO. Switching cancer centers and MO's was the best decision for me. I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

  • beach2beach
    beach2beach Member Posts: 246
    edited January 2022

    Definitely seek or meet a new MO. This is a person you will have in your life for quite a while, unlike family, we can change these people Loopy. You want to feel comfortable and conifident that your questions, no matter how big or small will be addressed. You don't want to second guess later on down the line that maybe you should have changed.