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Post mastectomy and feeling alone

rla2144 Member Posts: 6
edited July 2022 in Just Diagnosed


I am 7 weeks post-op bilateral mastectomy and feeling alone. I have gained weight and having a hard time with the pain from the tissue expanders. I am so disfigured and over my normal weight that I won’t go out in public. I am finding myself in a dark place and having trouble getting through the day. Did anyone else find themselves in this position?


  • WC3
    WC3 Member Posts: 658


    The changes that happen to our bodies during treatment can be difficult to cope with. I certainly had my low moments during treatment because I felt and looked so unwell at times. but I think it helps to keep sight of the fact that you are in a transitory period and many of the changes, such as weight changes, can be temporary. The expanders are also temporary and you might find yourself pleased with the final reconstruction results. This will all be behind you eventually and you will have a return to normalcy.

  • sunshine99
    sunshine99 Member Posts: 2,652

    Hi rla2144, I'm sorry you are suffering and are in a dark place. It's hard to look forward to healing when you are in physical pain. If your pain is keeping you from going out, you might mention it to your doctor - either your surgeon or your MO. The weight gain is no fun and is discouraging. I hope you find some relief very soon.

    Wishing you a restful weekend.


  • typhoon
    typhoon Member Posts: 59

    I'm so sorry that you're feeling low. If you haven't already done so, please consider speaking to a therapist (perhaps your GP, surgeon, or oncologist could offer some recommendations). Some PTSD symptoms, including depression, are not uncommon after the major events you've been through. I hope that things start to improve for you!
    Depression (
    Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) (

  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 4,703

    I am so sorry you are feeling so icky right now. I hated my expanders too. You are also having a lot of feelings you do not realize right now. That PTD article is a good one I know and know a lot of us go through that as well. There is light on the other side and there are people you can reach out to here and if you have support people there you can speak with you should do it as well. Best wishes in your recovery as well and heal quickly.

  • serendipity09
    serendipity09 Member Posts: 769

    I am sorry you are feeling so down. I can def relate as my body has changed drastically and I'm not comfortable in my own skin right now. I do, however, have the hope that all of this is temporary and that time is needed to heal from the physical and emotional toll treatments and surgeries have had on us. We are our own worst critics. Nothing that you've been through is easy.

    You are not alone and my hope for you is to be gentle and kind to yourself.


  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 185

    Most of us here know what your feeling that alone No one on my big family had breast cancer. But fiance and parents siblings were there for me. But couldn't know what I was feeling we were planning our 2nd marriages when I found the lump went thru and opinions biopsy etc. Forward 28yrs later cancer Survivor Praise God my faith helped me to have Hope and Positive thinking. We are here for you. msphil. Idc stage2 0/3 nodes 3 mo chemo before and after L mast expander then removed body rejected it got married then 7 wks rads 5 yrs on tamoxifen this also Your 28yr Wedding Anniversary. Hold on keep Hope.

  • sbelizabeth
    sbelizabeth Member Posts: 956

    Hold on. I promise you there are brighter days ahead.

    My oncologist started me on an anti-depressant during treatment. I wasn't aware I was depressed, just scared and sad. It made a world of difference. I felt like a heavy black cloud was lighter.

  • lehrski
    lehrski Member Posts: 68

    How are you doing now? Are you starting to heal?

    I too went through a dark time. It's a lot of changes to accept. I found friends were much more accepting of me than I was of myself. If you are well enough, even just getting outside to sit in a park or a phone call with a friend could help. I definitely wished I had gotten therapy to deal with feelings.

    You are not alone. This board can be a good resource of people who understand. Hugs and warm thoughts.