Just diagnosed, feeling shocked, anxious, lost
Hello, I've been on this forum for the last several days and just joined today as my GP advised me this afternoon that my biopsy results came back confirming breast cancer.
I don't have much info other than the size of lump which is 3.75cm x 2.75 cm x 2.75 cm.
Feeling all over the place with this diagnoses and also kicking myself for waiting to get this lump checked out. I first found it a few years ago but dismissed it thinking it might have been just my breast bone seeing how hard it was. But at the beginning of Sept, after a 4th miscarriage I decided to put my health as priority and get things checked out. Two weeks ago I had ultrasound and mammogram, last wed a biopsy and here I am…
I'm still trying to digest this info and at the same time,worried about how I will be able to care for my 4 year old during this process, we are also curently relying just on my income and I will need to take time off so worried about finances.
I think once there's more clarity on my diagnosis and treatment plan, I'll be able to make sense of it all but for now, just feeling lost.
Some of the posts and replies have been super helpful. Hoping I can reach out to this group when I have questions and thanks for reading my rant.
If you have any advise on how to navigate the next few weeks, I'm all ears.
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I’m sorry you’re here but welcome. This is a wonderful place to discuss and learn about all that goes on with this BC diagnosis. The beginning (for me) seemed to take forever with appointments, exams, tests, different doctors and my own habit of researching everything (researcher by profession too). Just take it one day and one step at a time.
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thanks @orknitter for taking the time to reply. I'm not a researcher by trade but I definitely prefer to be always overprepard. So I have a bad habbit of going down the google rabbit hole. Taking advise from other posts to make sure I'm getting info from trusted site like this though and will take your advice too - one day at a time…
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@baffled26 - Welcome! We're sorry you have to be here for this reason, but glad you joined us. There is so much support and understanding in this wonderful community.😊
You’re absolutely right that things tend to get a bit easier once you have a full treatment plan in place and can start taking things step by step. In the meantime, here is a helpful page from our main site you might want to look at while you wait for more information:
We hope this helps. Let us know how things go. We're thinking of you!
The Mods
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just spoke to my hospital and it looks like based on size of lump, they need additional testing on my biopsy sample until the doctor will be ready to speak to me. It's looking like Oct 22 to review the pathology report…gosh, ita a long time to wait…the nurses are wonderful though. I appreciate the info they provide.
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The long wait is probably due to the need for FISH testing from an outside lab because of indeterminate HER2 staining (excess of human epidermal growth factor receptor 2.) If it's positive it changes the treatment. It can take a couple of weeks to get the result. Everything seems to take forever at first but it does get better when you have a treatment plan. We sympathize.
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thanks @maggie15 that makes sense. I think my doctor mentioned there will also be more additional testing to be done before a treatment plan is finalized. What are some common ones I can expect? I read there's genetic testing, CT/MRI? And then there are other doctor apts with surgeon, oncologist, plastic surgeon - any other's?
Also other than nymph node biopsy, how will they test to see if there's cancer in other areas? I have an apt with my GP tomorrow as I've been finding it hard to breath (working harder to take full breath, chest tightness and feels like airway is contricted). I know it can be a variety of reason for this and unrelated to BC but nervous it could be a sign the cancer has spread
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Hi @baffled26, You will probably have an MRI and genetic testing done before surgery. It sounds like you have decided on a mastectomy so you will definitely meet with the surgeon, plastic surgeon and medical oncologist. Unless lymph nodes appear suspicious on the mammogram or ultrasound a sentinel lymph node biopsy will be done during surgery. It’s unusual for cancer to have spread elsewhere if there are two or fewer nodes positive.
Sometimes the proposed treatment plan changes a bit after surgery. I had one positive node found so axillary radiation was added to the scheduled whole breast radiation. My tumor was 3.2 cm but I had an oncoplastic lumpectomy rather than a mastectomy. If your surgical pathology is ER+/HER2- with two or fewer positive nodes an Oncotype DX test will be done on the tumor to see whether chemo would be recommended. With more than two positive nodes an axillary lymph node dissection (ALND) would be scheduled. If the results of that put you at stage III you would have further scans (bone, PET or CT) to see if the cancer has spread. No further scans are done for stage II unless you have symptoms.
Breathing problems can have many causes. Depending on what your GP finds you may have an X-ray or CT scan to help with a diagnosis.
I hope all your upcoming appointments go well. Feel free to ask if you have more questions.
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Hi baffled26,
This is my first post here and I can say I can relate to feeling baffled and anxious upon diagnosis. I received my diagnosis this summer as I was packing up my family to move so I could start a graduate program I have worked really hard to get into while raising my kids. I left my job, set-up life for my kids in our new location, got my teeth cleaned and went for my routine mammogram. I do not match any of the risk factors and I am really young for the demographics. I could not wrap my brain around the diagnosis.
I dealt with the situation my usual way, which is to research it from every angle and get several opinions. I talked to radiation oncologists, medical oncologists and surgeons. I picked practitioners of different ages and backgrounds, and I did get varied recommendations. I asked the doctors for the studies they are basing their recommendations on and found them on pubmed and proceeded to read through them. This research along with spending time in contemplation helped me settle with the situation. I am usually not one to ask for help, but these past few months, I decided to try something different and shared my diagnosis with people in my community and the outpouring of kindness and help has been heartwarming. When I feel a wave of fear arise, I take a moment to sit with it, then pray to see how this situation may bring positive things into the life of my family. Sending hugs and blessings
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@maggie15 thank you so much!! The info you provided is super helpful ❤️
@sunrisemom thank you for sharing your story and how you coped with it ❤️
I really appreciate everyone taking the time to respond and all the detailed info provided ❤️ The sense of community kn this forum and those around me are really helping me to move forward
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Just wanted to add that, for me and for many others, the time between diagnosis and having your treatment plan figured out is a unique form of hell. There are so many questions to be answered and the context is all new and unfamiliar. Everyone deals with this differently, as you've already started to learn.
It gets better. Once more is known and you have your treatment team assembled, it's easier to make sense of it all and start facing what's ahead. That doesn't mean there aren't hiccups along the way, as Maggie alluded to, but somehow it's a little less overwhelming to handle those once you have your bearings. Hang in there ❤️
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Thanks @kks_11 I like how you put it "unique form of hell". It's such an emotional time too as I tell people at work. I know I dont have to share but its hard not to given the role I have and the relationships I've built. But through that process, I've been blessed to find out I have so many supportive people around me which gives me the motivation to fight hard and hope for a quick recovery. I tell them I hope to return in just a few short months…not exactly sure if thats realistic but its my hope.
I'm relieved to hear it gets less overwhelming. Fingers crossed my hospital calls next week for an apt soon.
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Hi Everyone,
Thought I'd give an update. I had my apt today with the surgeon to review test results and he confirmed stage 2, ER/PR +, HER-. Lumpectomy to be scheduled for 3-4 weeks from today with sentinel node (removal if I recall correctly?).
Exactly as Maggie said, if lymph nodes come back clear, it would just be radiation and meds for treatment.
Like all of you mentioned, I definitely feel relieved to know there's now a plan. I was such a ball of nerves during the waiting period but I think I dissociated myself from the diagnosis or from the emotions at times, maybe as a coping mechanism? It was a weird feeling.
Now its waiting for referral apts for fertility, counselling and genetic testing plus the surgery date.
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@baffled26 glad to hear your update! Managing the appointments can feel like a part-time job in itself, but it definitely sounds like you're doing all the right things.
Just wanted to put a plug in for the online support groups, and the cohort groups here (October 2025 Surgery, etc). Both have been very helpful to me. ❤️ Good luck!
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