INSOMNIACS place to talk in the wee hours
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Holeinone-thanks. I suppose the progression is my own fault since I stopped taking the afinitor AMA. Dreadful SE. This doc suggested I go back to take afinitor again.. no way. So that leaves 2 other options, one doable one icky. Always something, choosing between the lesser of two miseries. Thank goodness I am off that plane.. Good luck on your surgery and I hope it goes well.
Yay PAtti- hope it works. Smarty hope you are all put together the way you like. Dutchie- ugly accident I am sorry. Years ago a drugged out man ran into my husbands car with his body, smashed the windshield, flipped over the car and landed in the middle of the intersection. I was behind my husbands' car having just picked mine up. I thought the crumpled object was a dog. The guys arm was bent the wrong direction, he was bloody and never lost consciousness! The cops thought he was high on PCPs - he fought like a lion with the ambulance crew. My poor husband was a nervous wreck after that accident, literally trembled. Some things you need time to soften.
Welcome newbies! Hi to all i missed. Chevy wish I could pack and go. I don't have the health to start over.
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Good Morning! Okay, I'm back on the last page, where Spookies Grand-kid got his wardrobe habits from his Grandma! Remember when those were called Thongs? Yep, they WERE! And when my Grandson had his on when he was younger, I commented on his "Thongs" and he looked at me, like I had lost my MIND!
He said with that embarrassed look on his face, "GRANDMA, they are not THONGS...they are FLIP-FLOPS!!!"
So he must have known they would move to Florida some day! Flip Flops they are, because those other stupid little "panty" strings are now thongs.
Also, he had on his Parka, AND another hat! Wow! Temp must have been around 65??????
But he IS a cutie! All Grand-kids are....
Dutchess.... Wow... I'm so sorry... I have never seen anyone hit like that, but witnessed a car-crash, and had to go to court as a witness... What I SAW, was not how I thought it would turn out...
This car was smacked as he was crossing the intersection.. on a BUSY street... I thought it was the guys fault that HIT him, but it was the guys fault who "took the right of way" from the guy driving down the through street.... Sorry Dutchess... Have you heard how she is? Did the driver stop?
2222222222222! About TIME! That horn-dog was the one "performing" with Miley the tramp on that one show! I would have divorced his a$$ a long time ago... Man, that "performance" they did was rank! Made you embarrassed to even WATCH it!
Enerva.... it's okay... You would not have liked it... Miley is the Tramp of the year... and now going or doing Arnold and Maria's Son, along with the whole 6th fleet. It's just one of those embarrassments we have in these parts... She has this bionic tongue that is somehow dragging on the floor. She needs to put wheels on it, and have it licensed.
Hopeful! I just found that picture from Google Images... I think the snow/ice was so deep,it just held the car on it's nose!
Oh HI Sugar! You know, all of the women are just afraid! Probably even the guys! When this one friend of mine had Breast Cancer, I/we...were all afraid for her! We didn't know what would HAPPEN to her!
But she MADE it... Lost all her hair from chemo... then a year later, it happened to her AGAIN with her other breast!
I think you could help yourself, AND them, but showing how beautiful and healthy you STILL are!
My friend has since retired, and is leading a happy, healthy life... It's been 15 years now!
You can help them all, by showing that early detection, those dreaded mammogram's, and self exams are what has saved so many of us!
You can be their mentor... that's what I think of Chris... She made us all more aware, and in charge of our own health.... You GO girl!
Oh, by the way, I am a tad older than you...
STOP LAUGHING SPOOKIE AND CAMMI!!! I CAN HEAR YOU BOTH FROM HERE!!!
Yes "Sweet Sue"....Hah! But we all know better....
.... I LIKE "sugar-cakes"! I have to leave that one alone... So does your Husband call you that? The guys from the club? See, we have to know all this stuff. My name from a previous past was "Billie-Jean-Bodine."...... Just because..........
Oh wow HIHO! That's just awful!.... It's just hard to try and "erase" those things you saw... no way to do it...
Do not eat sugar??? Is she NUTS? WTH? And I suppose no chocolate cokes either? I would go somewhere else.
Your shoulders.... eeeeeks! I went through that rotator cuff repair with my Daughter.... Stayed all night with her the first night... and that "thing" that was connected to her.... the ice thing.... OMD! And then the therapy! But she had me..... I kept her laughing... maybe it was the drugs.
Morning Beaches and Rosie....
Rosie, so what's this about? You think the "progression" is your own fault? No... don't think that... It just happens... It's a wonder he didn't say it's because you ate sugar....
We are with you kiddo.... love your sense of humor... Sorry about what your Husband saw...
You might not THINK you have the health or energy to start over... but you COULD you know...? I could help you...
No.... don't start over.... I almost DID once.... Way to hard to even think about.... Give it time.....
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The car did stop. They didn't slow down at all until after they hit her. The driver didn't see the runner and the runner didn't see the car coming. I doubt the runner knew what happened. The runner look 18-19 yo. I thought of my own daughter who also likes to go on long runs.
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Oh, I know.... I saw a little girl in the store one time.... sitting, waiting for her Mom... And I smiled at her, because she was my little Daughter's age.... and when she got up, she only had one leg... I just turned around and started crying.... Things just hit you like that.....
Even walking on sidewalks.... A car can run right up there and hit you.... Driver isn't paying attention....
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http://www.wimp.com/yarnknitting/
Enerva! Did you see THIS?
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Sugarcakes- welcome to our thread, and sorry you find yourself in this situation. I am wishing you the best as you start chemo. My sister had HER 2 positive cancer and began with chemo too.
One of the hardest things I found to deal with during my diagnosis and treatment is other people's reactions. We all decide how much we want to share with others around this. I did not tell a lot of people as I am self employed and wanted to avoid having it in my professional community. That being said, I had great support from the few friends I told and whose help I needed. A few others could not deal with it and disappeared, or at a minimum, distanced themselves. Not everyone can deal with the C word.
If I can give you any advice from my bc journey, it is to not spend time making others feel okay about what is happening to you. I just had to learn to let folks know this was a time I needed to focus on myself and getting through treatment. It helps to stop all the questions, judgments, etc. that go with this stuff. A lot of people have belief systems around who gets cancer. I don't have a big history of it in my family (despite the fact my sister and I got diagnosed within months of each other). I have always tried to take good care of myself with healthy eating, exercise, etc. As I have heard my oncologists say, cancer does not discriminate, anyone can get it. Or as I like to say, sh%$*t happens.
Also, if people want to help, let them. Many people will want to do things to support you as you go through treatment. I had to learn to just be specific with people about what I needed. Can you run and errand, just call to check in on me, get me something good to eat, etc. It is also okay to say no to people who want to come visit when you are not up to it. It is hard to know at first what you will need, but you figure it out along the way.
There are lots of great threads here to help you along the way with your treatment from chemo, to rads, to surgery, hormone therapy, and more, so explore and find all the threads that work for you. The insomniacs are a great group to keep your spirits up!
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your are right jazzy,,,it just happens. It has been a 13 year journey for me. Never went off treatment , made me take a 21 dy breaK once. Prob a good thing cause I had fluid fillings in my lungs. On treatment again and almost back to full lung capacity. I di not keep silient, did however move many many many into my outer ring.haha.i kept those close who can listen and just let me talk about stuff. And the don't add any comments . They say things when I am done talking like, what fun thing do you want to do this week, or can in come over and in knit with you.
Somehow you have to figure a way you can handle what is ahead of you and keep people close the will be in the fire with you letting you be you !
I have lost friends and fam members over this cause I refuse to eat the asparegus that will cure me. I have actually been the not nice sue...and said you want come run with me...oh right , you can't keep up,,,and that me on 13 years of cancer...you wanna run by me a axactly what I'm doing bad. And further more, while you are pooping all the chocolates in you mouth, chips and pop....evidently you don't believe in preventive precautions . How easy it is to try to control someone else's life and the can't control their ows...those our outer curls, or gone girls.
Ok chevy.....she I was growing up, my brother was 2 years ahead of me....I was proud of my big brother, he of course wouldn't walk next to my...but everyone knew he was my big brother cause of my big mouth and me chasing him on the playground. Well, they called him big tuna....I then got called little tuna.
I one of the salons I worked, three chair salon, we were three Susan's. I wear labeled sueann. Not sure I like either.
It's interesting, when I an with my old friends I am sue, with my knew friends I am Susan, and then there are the really old friend that say hey...hi, cause we need a moment to come up with the name
Have a good all
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Hey Jazzygirl and SugarCakes, great points. Some people will want to help you, I agree let them. Some people like to run errands, some like to cook. When they ask what they can do to help, ask the people that you know they like to cook to make a meal and drop it off. The ones that can run errands, ask them to shop. But have a list of the things you need help with, and when they offer to help you know what you need. I was very grateful when someone offered. My older friend just wanted out of the house, so she would drive me to chemo and pick me up. I could drive, but it was what she could do so I let her. We could chat, and she felt useful. And I was happy to chat on the way. The support helped me so much. My hair stylist wanted to help, and she shaved my head when I started to lose my hair, for free. My neighbor would pick up dinners on his way home, and I am now teaching him how to cook.
As frustrating as BC can be, they are ways to make it so much better with a little help from our friends!
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Hi ladies- my BS office just called and pushed my six month check up with her tomorrow out to March. Ugh. Well, my other stuff was clear (good blood work with the MO and mammo and ultrasound okay), so I am going to focus on getting back to work now on a new consulting gig. They said as long as there were no new problems, March will be okay.
Rather than be frustrated, I am going to shift to an attitude of gratitude to say I am two years out from end of treatment and doing well! My focus now is on better health, weight loss, etc. I did my monthly check in with the personal trainer and lost another % of internal body fat and another inch around my waist. Getting closer to my goals!
I learned pretty young (in my early 30s) who could deal with the hard stuff. I had some very serious things going on in my family and a lot of people avoided me, or acted like no biggie with some really hard things going on in my life, and learned then not everyone does the tough stuff. Either they can't, or don't want to. I had people be honest with some things going on then like "I don't know how to help you" and I would be very clear with them about what I needed and what was not helpful. That is an early skill I developed that helped me through other difficult times that have followed.
Some of the best advice I ever got around dealing with people during hard times came from a counselor I was seeing during a healthcare crisis of one of my parents in my 40s. She said "during difficult times, if people cannot help you, push them to the periphery and pick up with them later. You don't need to be helping people through their feelings or needs during difficult times." That wisdom has helped me many times through the years.
What I have learned is that you don't have to experience something to have empathy for others. I do believe people that either have had cancer or have helped others during treatment are your best support system. It is great when people can just be present with you. I have had great support from people who have not had cancer either. They just cared about me and did what they could to help from near or far.
Susan- oh yes, I have had lots of advice from people before, during, and after treatment too. Wow, I did not know asparagus would cure you, although I have been told the colon cleanse will keep your reoccurrence down. I too have friends who can be present with me even now, and ask how I am doing from time to time. I have others that still act like I just had the flu or something. I remind myself with the later that has more to do with their coping skills than mine.
Oh and I am helping a friend who is going through cancer treatment right now myself. She is in her second round of chemo. She has a gyn cancer, and saw her after her surgery in Dec, brought her some things to eat, had a good visit. She is now back to work and doing chemo too so we are keeping in touch with calls. Right now she is trying to cope with chemo and working so I am not putting any pressure on to visit. But we did talk about a visit soon when she is up to it. I told her I would run any errands she needs too. Paying it forward to another sister going through treatment.
Wishing the newbees here a good support system to help you through!
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Susan, for my fibro getting off the AI's was the trick. Still have post polio pain, but that's a easy peasy now compared to the fibro. Plus, the memory foam bed I got a year ago. I even sleep on my back which was a nono for decades. Every morning now I wake up on my back. it's terribly lazy, but I even go back to sleep b/c it feels so good. That's a secret Sshh.Enerva, you need to get your entrepreneur brain working. You could be wealthy and so could all you relatives. Your crochet art. is valuable. I keep harping about it b/c it's true. Please, make up some of your prettiest pieces and send them to Vera Wang. I'm not nuts here. Just think you wouldn't have to take that stupid train any more in freezing weather.
@222222Hugs You will come through this. Keep praying , we will too.
Patty, pain doc must have seen something that really got his juices flowing about helping you. Prayer for him and you.
Cami you sound wunnerful. What ever you did keep doing it. Funny story about your Mom/
2222222222222222, I had to open the doors to get the house to warm up. Insulated to well.I'd like the house temp to be Chevy's age.
jazzy, I read some about the dx, have learned lots. But not hitting the research like I used too. I' d rather be doing something else. I know enough now what's the worst and best. Hoping for the best. My GU doc I think is going to be GREAT. The first available appt. was feb 18th. The secretary then listened to the hx. She said let me see what I can move around and talk to him. < 15 later they have me in for Feb 2nd with a cysto the same day. COOL. He has strong ties to Moffitt. God will guide.
Rosie, I missed something about your leg?
Okay going to watch the pole dancer BBL WOW. wouldn't it be nice to have control of every single muscle in the body.
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I don't think the medical system realizes they are talking themselves out of a job. If sugar causes all ills and exercise is the cure, why do we need them?
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Isn't it ironic that the change in the MJ laws will come about b/c the state governments are looking at the $$$. Hah 5 years it'll be our biggest cash crop and we will be the biggest exporter. Unless they mess it up with pestisides. Then no one will buy it. $$$$ talks.Smarrty, Yay to "the End".
Spookie That's Florida. We are lost when we have to wear socks. Today I had one brown sock on and one black sock. So stylish
Dutchy sorry for the person and sorry for you. Best thing to do is talk, talk, talk. If you can do so exercise to that will help. It's an endorphin thing that will help your brain. Can mean the difference of months of flashbacks.
Susan, good luck for DH with sx. Glad you didn't have so many s.e.'s from the prolia
Hi Sugarcakes welcome here. We are mostly nuts or trying to be. I have a friend that's HER2 . Dx'd in 1998 and still truckin and still working full time as a nurse
There's a nice positive story for you.Hopeful are you still here? I saw where Chevy talked to you. I must have missed a page.
Chevy what fun on the finger knitting. I think I could do it.
Oh Susie Rothflol "Pooping all the chocolate in your mouth"
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Chevy finger knitting how did I miss that talent. Claire just got me into arm knitting did this last light
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Oh WOW!!!!!!!!!!!! That is great! I haven't tried it yet, but I bought some yarn... I think I could make a "rope" to hang my reading glasses in!
This is beautiful.....
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Everyone, what I said to Dutchy came out of EMS research after the MGM grand fire, Baton Rouge airliner crash and one other disaster of the early 1980's.
Two major outcomes of the research from those incidents:
1.Critical Incident Debriefing(CIB) Talking through the incident with all the responders. Covering the incident from a-z. Bring in personnel that would guide the debriefing.
2. Exercise within 24 hours of the incident. With a continued plan, but the most critical aspect was the first 24hours.
The early 80's was still very early in EMS. The energy of folks evaluating every aspect of a disaster was very high. What we were doing in that time was new. Sometimes made up on the fly as things were happening. The group that formed to evaluate the mental health of the responders would fly to the disaster sites and observe and create. By the third disaster they had a plan that encompassed the two items mentioned above and put ithem into action.
They tracked responders over one year.
What they found was those responders that were involved with CIB and the exercise were healthier in all aspects at the end of one year. Their mental health was intact.
Those responders that did not take part in either were not as healthy. Physically or mentally. A surprise finding was the number of responders that left the system entirely.
In their summary presentation was recommendation that CIB and exercise combined could prevent responders from experiencing ill effects and from being lost to the system. They suggested that both items be built into the everyday practice of the departments.
Flash forward to 2015. We know CID is part of every incident anywhere. The exercise is not as well known. I don't know why? What is known is that exercise produces Endorphins. Endorphins are the bodies natural opiate. That natural high can help us cope.
Bad news comes your way? Get thy butt moving and work up a little natural high
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OH CHEVY that was beautiful Thank you
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Sass- The PET /CT scan showed a large blob of white across the femoral shaft just below the hip. It looks like it goes clear across side to side. Radiologist said "at risk for pathological fracture, follow-up clinically." The 2nd opinion doc made a case for get it taken care of before it breaks or you'll be sorry. SO I made an ortho appointment for 2 weeks from now the earliest they could get me in. Interestingly it doesn't hurt there but down further where it aches relentlessly and in my left knee. He said it might be referred pain, maybe they could radiate it. My right hip hurts more then the left! I think because I transfer all my weight (alot) to my right hip, trying to keep weight off my left lower femur where it hurts. Then the other spots of pain and misery are explained by the scan. Not surprised. The aromasin must have been working because blood counts are great. My bone marrow recovered. Alas the bones are being eaten again. This doctor mentioned 4 options, 2 just have me wildly depressed, one isn't approved yet and the other my oncologist said he would NOT give me again. So here I sit, utterly conflicted about doing anything. I haven't called my MO, but I might if for just pain meds since I am nearly out. It would be nice to be more comfortable, if nothing else.
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Rosie.... just a thought.... Could you use a walker just for the time being? I mean it DOES put more pressure on the other side when you limp.... I mean even a cane?
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Chevy- I suppose. I have a cane that I got at Fubon Asian Market for 3 bucks! Some weird Chinese wood. works though. We have crutches that my kid used last year when she had surgery on her foot. Maybe I will try that. I have uptake in my right humerus and that will ache only if I lay on my stomach up on my elbows putting pressure on it. The crutches shouldn't aggrevate that.The left upper arm never hurts because they cut all the nerves in it, when they did the axillary disection 17 nodes out. So it can light up on a scan but never hurts. There is cancer in the right femur proximal and distal, both knees, tibia and distal ends of the femur. Funny this 2nd opinion doc wasn't even going to scan my knees but I begged the radiologist and sure enough- cancer in both. Wish doctors would listen to patients. I am just hanging out in my chair... no moving or walking and no pain. Kind of limiting but effective. I will have to decide something... procrastinating like that will accomplish anything but avoiding the ultimate! haha.. the games we play in Cancerland. My pets missed me and all I have done is pet and cuddle with all my furballs.... lovely.
I have to add that I was gone just 10 days and got back and my tulips are coming up!! In January??? I have lovely round pink camillia flowers and the Camilia bushes are loaded with buds. My lenten roses are ALL popping up and budding... holy cow winter just vanished and spring SPRUNG! I am not complaining, just so surprised!!
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walkers are great. For about three months I had to use a walking stick, but as stable as the carts in the grocery store...lol so I think chevy is right, walkers, with the seats are the way to go. Have a chair ib bathroom when I can't stand to wash. That works great to.....transfer bench next so I dont slip liked chevy...lo
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wonderful peacful video Chevy...thanks
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You guys.... when you get chemo, does that treat all of your body, or is it generalized? I had thought it went through your body, and woukl work on any cancer cells.... unlike radiation, which is more localized...
You can see how much EYE know.... I just thought that chemo would help you all over.... different types I know.... It's like you are chasing that evasive med that will help!
I'm so sorry Rosie..... I have to figure something else out for you.... Go buy a Kneeler... That way you can work in your garden where your Tulips are coming up! I have one, and it helps around the house, AND the gardens!
This is it.... It really helps me getting down AND up! Can you work in your garden? You can turn this upside down, and sit on it....
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Spring has sprung? I would love that, we have ice and snow and a frozen Lake Erie. The lake is 92% covered in ice. But the lake is beautiful when it is frozen. And I saw the bald eagle fly by this morning. We have a nesting pair that live in the woods at the elementary school. Such a sight when they fly over the ice. I guess I will have Spring when the ice melts! I find comfort and peace when I walk the beaches, or float the day away on my raft. I collect beach glass and driftwood, keeps me busy and the walking is great to keep my mood up and positive! The beaches are my happy place. I can forget everything, and surround myself with the parks and the creatures that live there. I hope everyone has a special peaceful place to reflect, and enjoy the day!!
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I just heard that Nevada has a vote up for legalizing pot. Can you imagine, you can play slots and smoke a doobie, all at that same time?
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Susan, love your head scarf and you are a lovely young woman. I watched the finger kniting. Not sure how practical it is.
Rosie, walked around the neighborhood this morning and saw daffidios have sprouted. Need to go see if mine have, theyre under ivy. It's been in the upper 60's (you know, around chevy's age).
Welcome to the newbies. Sorry you have joined us on this crappy journey. Be sure to save your favorite threads, makes it easier to go back to. I have several but alway come here several times a day.
I'm surprised that the incisions are not hurting more. I'll take what I can get. I think I heal weird. Everybody thinks I'm so brave dealing with all this but I feel like I cheated somehow since mine has been pretty minor. I have one friend who hasn't been "there" like I thought she would. She actually got pretty upset just before the first surgery more than I was. Oh well, everybody deals how they deal. We still talk but I don't see her as much as before
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sugar cakes, if you do Facebook, you might want to see about setting up a friends group just for your BC. I have a friend who's triple negative and now about 6 months out since her last treatment. It was an easy way to keep people up to date and to let them help as needed. She had meals sent to her and the family, car rides when needed, etc. got lots of encouragement from friends out of her area too. Something to think about
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Rosie don't know if there's anything in these that will help, but I worked on them allot
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/102/topic/826526?page=3#idx_71
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/8/topic/770655?page=1
I'm a fan of fentanyl with oxy for breakthrough
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Chevy, If I need Chemo, I'm going to ask for a one type covers them all. It'll save me time LOL
Susieq --your are BEAUTIFUL, strange hair though. Recessive gene?
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kguSGXP3-_E
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxweAMlWVDA