Double Mastectomy 10 Years Later
Hello Ladies! When I was diagnosed in 2014, my son was a toddler and I could not afford the recovery time. I so wanted to get both breast done. I actually wanted to go smaller. I have always had big dense breasts. Now I've put on a ton of weight from menopause and my breast are out of control as well as each shaped differently. My surgeon at the time said it's not a one-shot deal and I can always come back. In April my survivorship one told me absolutely yes I can have them done and it would be considered risk reducing.
I am frightened. I feel like Ive been blessed to survive so much, that now I'm going into an 'elective surgery' and afraid of complications or worse. I hate that I cannot allow myself the grace to do something that will make me happy. I also feel guilty- like it's your fault you got fat and you just need to lose the wait. Or God will punish you for doing something out of vanity.
Anyway, just hoping for some feedback from others and how your surgery went, if you felt any guilt, etc. Also from those who had theirs way after they've finished treatment. TIA!
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Hello Mary. Sorry you are having an emotional time considering your mastectomy. Let's face it, surgery is always scary. I understand your feelings since I had a single mastectomy 3 years ago. At the time I wanted a double mastectomy but my oncology team advised against it since I had IBC. Anyway, I have one "DD" breast and it is aggravating every single day. I consider going back for the prophylactic mastectomy to be flat (NO reconstruction for me) but I'm also afraid of having a poor outcome.
I have lymphedema in my surgical side and worry that an additional surgery will cause lymphedema on the other side, too. I really don't think I could stand that so the fear keeps me from moving forward with additional surgery. So many "what ifs" to consider.
All this to say, I totally understand your mixed emotions! I'm sending positive thoughts and a cyber hug to you. Is your surgery scheduled yet? Take care of yourself.
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Mary, first, and most importantly, God does NOT punish us! Yes, you were blessed to have survived as you said and you need to keep your faith! It has been 10 years since you were diagnosed, you’ve been on a roller coaster, I know. I do not understand what is holding you back, what you are questioning yourself about? If it is fear, that is understandable, of course. Although, it sounds like there is more to it. Do you know? Do you want to share? I myself have been there. I was diagnosed with stage 3B invasive lobular carcinoma in 2009. It has been 15 years and I am a survivor. It was not easy, by any means. But, I would never had gotten through any of it without my faith, prayers, family, friends, and SHARING! Yes, this group truly helped me. I would be more than happy to share my experience with you and/or hear yours. Anytime. Colette
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Hello @maryjc. I know my experience is so different but perhaps my perspective will add a little something … last August I had a single mastectomy and then in March I had the implant put in and the other side reduced to match my new implant. I previously wore an H cup. Let’s just say I was more than well endowed and I really didn’t like my large chest. I never would have considered a breast reduction surgery if not for cancer … in part for fear of surgical complications and of course the financial part. But now that it’s done … I am so, SO happy I got the reduction surgery!!! I used to have headaches almost daily and constant back, shoulder and neck aches. I am amazed at how much of a difference the reduction has made!! My neck and back will thank me for the rest of my life!
I had an advantage of comparing surgeries … having the one side with a mastectomy then an implant exchange and the other side simply reduced … I will say, the reduction surgery was so much easier! I would definitely recommend it for others with large breasts who have discomfort from being so large. Yes, there was some pain afterwards and I had to limit my arm movement for about 6 weeks (plus I accidentally opened my incision in one spot because I was trying to do housework on week 3 because I was feeling good but it was way too soon!!) and sadly, for me, the reality is I don’t have any nipple sensation like I used to but the breast still feels like me (compared to the other very fake feeling side). It’s all been a weird adjustment but I’m still really happy I did the reduction.
It sounds like you are weighing this all out and I’m sure you know that any surgery takes a good amount of energy and recovery time. For context, I am 50 years old and in excellent health except for having had breast cancer, and was in fairly good physical shape prior to both surgeries, less so now but trying to get back in shape. This past surgery was overall harder to bounce back from but I think I was fatigued still from the first surgery and from Tamoxifen induced sleepless nights. You would have a nice advantage of scheduling your surgery and preparing yourself for it … getting as healthy as you can in advance and getting in the best shape you possibly can … limited arm movement can be such a challenge! Not being able to raise your arms up above your shoulders takes some creative thinking and planning. But those few weeks quickly pass and then you can start moving and using your arms naturally again. It may still take time to regain strength and full range of motion but it was so much easier on my reduction side. I had such minimal pain too … all concentrated in one spot along the incision that was extra bruised, so it made sense. I suppose the pain and discomfort can vary greatly between people but it was really minimal for me. I took prescription pain meds for a couple of days, then Tylenol alternating with Advil for a few more days, maybe up to a week and a half.
One thing I was really grateful for was having all that tissue examined and it came back clean - with no evidence of DCIS or any tumors! That was like a very large biopsy and gave me a lot of peace of mind. I think I can also understand your feeling like “why tempt fate?” and so forth … I felt so guilty having chosen to do a non-essential reconstruction that required a second surgery and I also feared complications. That guilt is long gone! At the end of the day, I know I’ve lived a balanced life, not taking crazy medical risks or having lots of unnecessary procedures … and this did have many health benefits, and was not solely for vanity’s sake.I wish you peace and clarity of thought as you weigh out your decision.
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