Lumpectomy Lounge....let's talk!
Comments
-
I'm working on it! We have about 2 hours worth of work in the backyard (yay!) and I have a cleaning lady coming tomorrow to give me an estimate. Everything in my house is covered in a light coat of fine dust, from having the hardwoods refinished. DH keeps complaining about "the kids" stuff, but it's not theirs--it's ours. Tomorrow I'm taking another load to the thrift store, then I'll load up some boxes for the storage unit. Every time I think I'm almost done, more stuff appears.
0 -
Poodles, way to go!!! I see that the infamous hanger (or rabbit) multiplier is operating at your house. Don't you love it?? Isn't it nice to have things fall in place FINALLY???
HUGS!!
0 -
LOL, I just took 150 plastic hangers to the local group that helps battered women get back on their feet. They will also be receiving my iron and ironing board, too, once I know for sure that I won't be doing anymore ironing (I'm retired! no more ironing!) My kids are supposed to come over Sat, and I plan to put them to work schlepping stuff to the thrift store and the storage unit, and helping their dad hang blinds in the basement.
Thankfully, I have some rooms that are almost totally empty. I'm holding on to a few dressers and chairs for now--I want to see what a real estate agent will advise, whether to keep them in the rooms or show the rooms empty. Mostly, we just have our bedroom suite, a cherry sideboard, our 35" TV, pots/pans, dishes, towels, and some lamps, in addition to whatever clothes we're going to keep. It sounds like just a small amount of stuff, but right now 80% of it is in my living room, so it looks like a huge mess. I want this stuff GONE.
0 -
Molly, I'm really sorry to hear about your Mom's passing and her Alzheimer's. Wishing you strength and peace moving forward. Nikki
0 -
Tina_Marie: Good luck with your lumpectomy tomorrow
0 -
Tina, I hope all goes well. Please keep us updated when you're able. A low key weekend sounds perfect for you. Between the surgery and the port placement, you deserve some rest!
Molly, I'm so sorry for your loss. It seems especially unfair given all that you're already dealing with. I've heard it said that Alzheimer's is harder on the loved ones than on the person who has it.
Mustlovepoodles, I'm in the process of moving/building a new house. I have to be out of my current home in a month, so I've got boxes everywhere and I've come to realize I have way too much stuff (including plastic hangers!). Plus, I can't lift much at all because of the surgery so the boxes have to sit wherever I'm packing until my son or son in law can come over and move them out of the way for me. I'm so looking forward to being settled into the new house. It's too much to deal with while also facing this disease.
0 -
Molly, I'm sorry to hear of your mother's passing. Even when they've been struggling a long time, it's a shock to the system when the leave you forever. There's never a good day to lose your mother.
Brightness, I sympathize with you. It's too much to deal with breast cancer AND moving. In fact, DH had prostate cancer in the midst of my breast cancer journey. I think that was the straw that broke the camel's back. Certainly, it was the catalyst for my retirement. Then my mother got sick and died, and we both said, "just screw it, we're moving on." I have been a caregiver all my life, professionally for 40 years. It's time to take care of ME.
0 -
Thank you ladies. It has been a long, hard road with this disease. I am glad she is no longer suffering but darn it is HARD. I miss her so much. Poodles, great job with almost finishing the house!
0 -
I finally figured out what happens to all those missing unmatched socks…they morph into hangers.
0 -
Chisandy, I just spit coffee! That was so funny, but makes so much sense
0 -
Sandy, Perhaps they do at your house but lost socks morph into dust bunnies at my house
HUGS!
0 -
As to LE chances - I was told that my chances where extremely low since I only had two nodes taken out. My arm was on fire within the first few weeks of rads but "not really swollen". Months later and several doctors brushing my complaints aside a PT strongly suspects I do have LE even though just 2 nodes were taken out! Bottom line - nodes cut out brings chances of development.
0 -
I only had two nodes taken, as well. But I had all kinds of complications including severe hematoma, seroma, and massive tissue necrosis. My breast surgeon told me that having had all that I would be at higher risk for lymphedema.
0 -
Molly - My heart is with you in the lost of your Mom. I lost my Dad a few weeks ago (which is why I've not posted in a while) He was 92. Unlike your Mom his mind was sharp as a tack but his body was plain tired. Every organ in his body taxed over the years and a slow growing cancer they deemed not reasonable to treat due to his age. I must say I've learned a lot about myself this past year. And most lessons have not been of my wanting to either. Prayers to you and your family.
Mustlovepoodles - Glad your 6 month check up went well. I had to postpone mine a bit but it will be a few weeks from now. I'm not looking forward to it. Not so much of my concern for mammogram showing anything but more that I have to speak my piece (in a nice way) my discontent with my last visit and the way the Oncotype was handled. Saw MO on a Tuesday and he asked all the wrong questions. (MO:Any side effects from my medicine? ) me: No, you haven't prescribed any. (MO: when are you going to start your radiation?) Me: I completed it two weeks ago. He finally opened up my file and read a bit, but think it was to lengthy for him to gain some ground with me. He prescribed meds and sent me on my way, in belief that I was in preventive mode with meds alone. Three days later I'm getting a call from OncoType people that tell me my doctor wants to see if I need chemo? Put me in an emotional spin. Seems MO neglected to tell me he was ordering the test when I saw him. I'm glad he did, but (clear throat) how 'bout letting the patient know. So . . . . I'm gonna see if the next visit goes any better, if not may be looking for a new MO.
TinaMarie - thinking of you and hope your LX went well and that you are recovering comfortably.
0 -
My goodness, Gardennerd! I believe I'd be rethinking this guy. He doesn't seem to be on top of his game (or YOUR game, either!)
I'm sorry to hear that your father passed away. It seems that we have a little bit of a club going on here. When my father lost his parents, he cried and carried on about being an orphan. I mean, wailing and really going on. I was mildly annoyed at the time, but I get it now. My mother was my last parent. I'm 60 and I know that in the next 10-15 years I will start to lose siblings, too. Or they will lose me. I guess we're all getting to the age where "stuff happens."
0 -
GardenNerd, my sincere condolences on the loss of your father. You will be in my prayers.
0 -
Gardennerd, so sorry for the loss of your dad and what you & he went through along the way. Sounds like he had good long run for most of his life—may his memory be for a blessing.
0 -
Gardennerd, your MO sounds terrible! You may be just another patient in a long day to him, but you're a unique and significant person in your own life. Before my surgery, I made my BS look at me and make conversation with me. I told her I wanted her to think of me as a person, someone dearly loved by my friends and family. She went above and beyond that and even asked me about my fears for surgery so she could keep them in mind when I was under.
Thank goodness you're able to advocate for yourself. That's one of the things I'm most concerned about for others. What happens to those who aren't able to research and educate themselves, to speak up for themselves? Do they just get pushed through the system like little guinea pigs?
I should hear about my pathology report and treatment plan today. Prayers and positive thoughts please. I'm trying not to let fear and worry get the best of me....
Tina, how did it go for you
0 -
Gardennerd, you're much nicer than me! I'd be tempted to punch 'em where it hurts & say "Bet you remember me next time!"
I have my first visit with MO on Thursday and (un)luckily she is going through BC herself right now so I'm hoping that gives her an insight others might lack. I would also think this would mean she's on top of the latest & greatest in treatment options. Fingers crossed.
Healing thoughts for us all!
0 -
Poodles, Brightness and Fleur - Right after the last appointment I immediately searched for a different MO, but that search didn't really bring forth anyone. And part of me wants the guy to have another chance. We all have bad days . . . so will give him another chance. But I LOL, Fleur in your solution to be remembered "punch'em where it hurts". In actuality I think where it really would hurt would be a bad review sent to the hospital in which he works with. And that is an option I will use if I don't get some warm and fuzzy feelings on next visit.
Brightness - hoping you have a good path. report!
Thanks to all for your kind words about my Dad. If I may share something. My Mom passed away when I was ten. Just months before her death my parents had taken in one of my cousins (10 years old too) to come live with us. She was born into a very dysfunctional family. Instead of doing the normal thing back then when the mother dies he chose to raise the two of us and my older brother on his own. Fifty years ago, it was the norm for motherless children get farmed off to aunts or grandmothers to help raise. Not my Dad he took on the very awkward roll of being Mom and Dad to us. And we all were blessed from his decision. He was a man of strong ethics that extended out throughout the family. We truly celebrated his life during his memorial. I am at peace and feel very blessed.
Poodles you are right, our buffer generation has passed on. We are next in line. I'm good with that too. I SO look forward to retirement and to benefit from all my hard work . . . as you should.
0 -
It was a shock to me after my mother died in 1990. Now I was the matriarch of the family! Hell, I was 45. My GRANDMOTHER was the matriarch even though she died in 1983. And I'm the oldest? Not only that but I became an orphan. Not a term normally applied to someone my age but it is true. You can never have your parents long enough. And you never get over losing them. It's so weird that even now I still want to call them and ask them something (maybe I'm nuts!). Now I also turn to ask DH something and that is disconcerting too. Even when he was so very sick and in the nursing home, I asked his opinion on things and got good answers. I am greeted with the eternal silence. (But I know he's at peace). Crazy, isn't it?
HUGS!
0 -
OMG—never thought of myself as the “matriarch!" (Although if you include cousins in “family,” I’m nowhere near old enough to be one).
0 -
Sandy, HAHAHAHA!!! I think my brother, perhaps not unkindly (giving him the benefit of the doubt) pointed that out to me. Matriarch is someone old. Like my grandmother who died at 94. I was 45. Didn't compute mentally
HUGS!
0 -
Thanks, Peggy. I really needed to hear the word "matriarch" tonight, LOL. Yes, I am the oldest of 5. Of the 5 of us, two have had breast cancer and two had uterine cancer. My brother chain smokes and is a pretty bad alcoholic--although he is 5 years younger than me, he looks 10 years older. One sister has type 1 diabetes, with all that implies. Another sister weighs over 300-lbs, with all THAT implies. Sad to think that we could start losing each other in the not-so-distant future.
Gardennerd, I didn't mean to overstep my bounds. Actually, I thought my MO was kind of a bozo the first time I met him. I gave him a second chance, in case it was just me. Nope, not me. It was him. He was even more dorky and inappropriate the second time around. I'm glad I gave him the extra chance, though. It made finding a new MO that much easier because I didn't second-guess myself for one instant.
0 -
Poodles, it is a weird feeling, isn't it? You and your siblings have collected a lot of medical problems
There's just my brother who is 3 years younger. He's had skin cancer and hasn't quit smoking yet (I quit 18 years ago). Hope you got a lot done over the weekend.HUGS!
0 -
It's the middle of the night and I can't sleep. There are still no answers to my pathology. I'm trying to believe no news is good news, well as good as possible, but the stress and worry is weighing on me.
Has anyone heard from Tinamarie? Do we have other people having surgery this week? I can get rather wrapped up in me and don't want to overlook anyone going through this also.
Goodness I'm glad I have this forum. I'm sick of pretending to be brave and optimistic for my family's sake. I just want to feel safe and get good news.
0 -
Brightness - the waiting for pathology reports for me was the hardest. Seems odd, as pre BC I would have said the surgery would have been. Hoping you get your news soon and that it is good news.
Matriarch talk . . . so strange to think of it that way. But guess its true in some ways. Not you Poodles, you can remain just being the "older sister". You don't have to claim the title.
0 -
Well I got my results. My MO said my tumor in the biopsy slides was actually 5mm, then during surgery was 3 mm (I suppose 2mm was removed during the biopsy. I'm considered ER/PR negative (test showed 0) and her2 positive based on original biopsy with fish analysis.
Now my dilemma. Because my tumor was 5mm, the MO said I can do taxol and herceptin or I can skip chemo altogether and just do radiation. The decision is mine. She said based on research, if I do the taxol and herceptin (12 weeks of both, then just herceptin every 3 weeks for a year, with radiation starting after,the 12 weeks) my chance of no recurrence in the next 3 years is almost 98%. If I skip taxol and herceptin and just do radiation, my chance of no recurrence over the next 3 years is about 94%.
I don't know what to do. I'm so afraid of potential SEs from chemo, but heaven forbid something goes wrong, will I blame myself for not doing chemo.
I'm asking here, but is there another place within the forum I should seek input? I know the decision has to be mine, but I'd appreciate any input to at least consider.
0 -
How old are you? Do you have any comorbidities that chemo would aggravate (antibiotic allergies, asthma that makes you vulnerable to infections, heart stuff)? That 4% difference in recurrence chances, with such a tiny tumor, IMHO wouldn’t be worth it to me. Is there any way to get a targeted treatment (there’s a new one that just got FDA approval) w/o chemo? You’d need radiation either way, unless you went back and got a MX, which is pure overkill for such a tiny tumor just to avoid radiation. Either way, though, you get to skip anti-hormonals.
0 -
Chisandy, thank you for responding so quickly. Soon after posting, I cracked and let the fear overtake me and had a good cry.
I'm 52 and relatively healthy and active. I had an echocardiagram and EKG prior to surgery and both indicated my heart is fine. I'm not allergic to anything that I know of. I could stand to lose about 20 pounds (currently 5'6 and 165-170 lbs). I'm thinking if I don't do the chemo, I'd definitely have to make some permanent lifestyle changes to get rid of and keep offthe excess weight. Plus I like feeling healthy. I'll definitely do the radiation.
I don't know anything about a targeted treatment. Can you explain that to me?
0
