Starting Chemo September 2015; join us!
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Hi proctor1725 my hair has started growing back whilst on tax. My nurse said the same thing as yours definitely wait it out. Fingers crossed for you sounds promising. Have to say looks funny growing back got a Friar Tuck look going on under my wig.
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Cajun - I also carry our insurance , so back to work after chemo I will go. I had my initial mammogram on school day #2 for my girls, so this whole school year has been off-normal for them. At least with my 3am insomnia I won't have issues getting to work by 5:30.
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Carolina Amy I am only 1.5 hrs from Charlotte in Winston-Salem so let me know if I need to drive down and bop your hubby in the nose! Or take you out for a milk shake! Fidget I will bop your hubby too if you like.
so many men do not possess the emphathy gene. Mine actually asked if I thought he would be empathetic enough for me through this whole process. At the time I told him he was lucky I was low maintenance but as the shitmo (perfect term!) progressed I could have used a more concerned approach from him. One day he was real sarcastic to me and I just blew up, called him an A....hole ran in the bedroom, slammed the door which promptly got stuck! I had to text my son to come get me out. I did not speak to him all night or the next day. No apologies at all. Some men just can't handle when we are not our very best taking care of EVERYTHING in the family and being strong. We have to rise above the behavior that is toxic to us if we possibly can.
So glad all of you are here for me too! Taxol weekly is exhausting me
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LilaClaire, fidget, CarolinaAmy and anyone else it applies to: I wish I could bob ALL of your hubbys in the nose! You don't need this with all you are going through. I had a bit of a fuss with my hubby about how he didn't cook my baked potato right one night when it was the only thing that tasted good. I started bawling and whining. Sounds like I should have kept my mouth shut and counted my blessings that he is as supportive as he is...my only real gripe is that he is big on telling me to be positive...I know being positive is a good thing, but dammit, it is really hard when one is the middle of this crap...And Artista may be reading this and thinking that there are times when a guinea pig (or is it a hamster?) makes the best company! Anyway, please hang in there, you deserve better times and they will come.
My first rads is today. Hoping it is relatively easy. Has to be easier than Taxotere, right?
Octogirl
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Hi everyone! I just finished with taxotere last week. I hope I'm done with chemo for good, and this would be such a moment to celebrate, but I'll probably wait next 20years to se if it helped
Taxoter was so much easier than AC. But I had 6 of tax. and last two were really hard. About my hair, it started to grow on taxoter, but it fell out again after the 4th one just like my dr said.
I want to wish everyone here to go throught this as easy as possible, although "easy" and "chemo"... My husband was great support for me, wouldn't surive without him! And he got me a puppy few months ago and that was the best thing to do in this dark days.
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Hi girls!
Fidget - Congrats on the good news! MarthaMo - Yay on finishing chemo! Proctor - I second what Jabe said about hair loss. That's exactly how it happened for me as well. I was more upset about the idea of losing my hair, but once it was gone it was easier. It still sucks, though.
Surgery has been officially decided. I'm having a UMX on 12/21 with either a tissue expander or implant depending on how much skin can be saved. Will decide on future reconstruction/reduction in another month or so. I have wrestled with my decision between lumpectomy and mastectomy for so long. I must have changed my mind ten times! Feeling really good about my choice after meeting with plastic surgeon yesterday. I feel like the surgery is more reconstruction/reduction than breast removal. I have always been large breasted, so I'm looking forward to having less. No more shoulder and back aches and difficulty finding tops to cover them. Fingers crossed lymph nodes are clear, but prepared for possible radiation. And chemo port comes out too. Yay!
Thank you so much for all the support. I don't know how I'd get through this without you ladies. Hugs to you all.
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Octo- She's a guinea pig.
She is my bff, best fuzzy friend. She knows something is up with me after shitmo so I get more cutesy antics from her. I was married to a very sensitive man long ago. He was wired right to handle this situation if we were still together. I can't imagine being with someone who isn't tuned in to me during this shit. That was a big reason why I married him despite our differences in other things which eventually led to our realizing we don't share the same ideas for the future. My bro is the only male other than many online male friends I have, that knows. Fam doesn't know. He gives great support as he's a sensitive guy but has told me he doesn't know what to say. Don, my ex, had a great gift with words. Used to write poetry for me even. I would be the type that God forbid the husband gets something and wants what he didn't give me, I'd be like payback's a bitch ain't it? lol. I know I wouldn't be as tuned in at least. For those of you that can let it go, wow. I couldn't. Personally I'd rather be alone with my guinea pig.
MarthaMo- Thanks for chiming in! So glad to hear you thought taxotere was better than AC. That's in general what my MO found but obviously everyone is different. I'll be starting it in 2 weeks and will be on the every 3 week schedule with no Neulasta (4 rounds total), which never bothered me anyway. And pets are the best. Always unconditional love. You love them, they love you back.
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My wbc were low during taxotere as well, everything else was fine during chemo except wbc, and, after the 3rd round od taxoter, me and the woman that was going through the same protocol with me, we both had elevated ALT (something to do with liver) but we sorted that out with some orange powder.
First 3 rounds of taxotere were really a piece of cake. I was recieving it on monday, and I would start simple paracetamol 3 times a day 500mg for 3 days. That was all. But after the 4th one my mouth felt like I ate a soap or something like that, that was not nice, I could eat, but only some food. Then 5th one was terrible - one day literally everything hurt me. And the last one wasn't so bad. I was tired sometimes, but I wouldalways make my self walk a lot, and that really saved me.
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Congrats on being done MarthaMo
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I have worked everyday since I came back from surgery, except CHEMO DAY. I 've had to go home early 2 days while on A/C because of bone paid and fatigue. It has been extremely hard at times, but I carry the insurance and I need my job. Finished A/C and I'm on weekly Taxol, tomorrow with be my 4th taxol treatment. Usually the worst is 2 days after Taxol for me. Anyone else having a relayed reaction? My blood counts were pretty good on A/C. Everything was a little lower last Wednesday when I went for my 3rd Taxol treatment hoping they stay OK. Anyone else on same schedule? Reading all of you guys posts have helped with my depression and anxiety. Thank you all for being here.
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Hi Everyone,
Had a lousy weekend after chemo #5, sooooo tired and bitchy. Yesterday I met with the first plastic surgeon who said he would do immediate reconstruction with an implant and then lift the other side in 6 months. Amy - like you it was a totally humiliating experience. I know my boobs sag, you don't have to remind me and then lift them up to where they should be. Then when the surgeon left and the assistant wanted to take before pictures she asked me to take off my hat. Um, no!!! My face won't even be in the shot and you can see my boobs but not my bald head!!!
I have another appt with a different PS today. Am interested to see what this one says. PS yesterday was concerned about putting in expanders and then having 6 weeks of radiation causing scar tissue and deformity. If the immediate gets ruined then it's some sort of FLAP surgery later. Oh joy, I was not expecting to hear that
Taste and appetite are gone, I've lost another 4 lbs since chemo last wednesday.
Fidget, I'm sorry about your DH. My kids and DH have all been clueless at one time or another during this process. DH wasn't going to go to PS appts with me, he had to work. Once I lined up a friend to go he realized how important it is. This is the person I am going to trust to cut open and reshape my body!
I also gave Christmas over to DH. The house is a half decorated mess and I just don't have the physical or mental energy to help out and finish and clean up. I'm just making it through paperwork and appointments. Today another PS, tomorrow a follow up on my eyes and Thurs another echo. Christmas will be here if the house is ready or not.
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I haven't posted in a while but have been catching up with all of you. Glad so many are moving on!! Positive thoughts for all!
So bummed. Went for Taxol 7 (DD) and counts were too low so they first said delay a week! I broke into tears - my kids are all coming for Christmas including my 9 month old granddaughter (only one) and I can't be knocked on my butt while they are here. I have felt exhausted Day 4&5 each Taxol round. So they came up with a plan to do neutropen shots today and tomorrow and chemo on Thurs and then shots every day for a while. I had a Neulasta after the first Taxol (and the 4 AC's) but that threw my body into wild mode and threw my counts sky high. So none the second time. I can't understand that my counts are low because little annoying sores, etc are all healing in the last few days. I now won't have any taste buds for Christmas but hopefully I will feel okay. I just can't get my head around this and am in pity party depressed mode. I thought I had it all planned to work out for a good Christmas visit.
MO seemed to think it was so dangerous I could get an infection and have to be hospitalized. I told him I've never had an infection and am not prone to getting sick (and I'm around kids at school daily) but he said we are dealing with chemicals which wreck havoc on the body. More crying about what the h*** we really are doing to our wonderful bodies. Still shedding tears..
Sorry for venting but I'm sure you can all relate. I am two away from being DONE!
Thanks for the post about the coconut oil and baking soda for mouth sores. I found a Prevention Oncology Mouth Rinse that seems to be helping. It had to be ordered on Amazon because CVS no longer caries it. My biggest issue is my tongue being so sore that when the taste buds recover a little that sore tongue hurts so much I can't chew food or swallow!
Here's the mouthwash in case anyone wants to try it. It's about $15.
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I'm crabby today. I find my mood and patience continue to head south as treatment progresses. I want to work in the yard but it's too bloody hot and I started to feel ill. Why is it 84 degrees in December? It's frustrating how long this process takes. I hate having all this time off of work and doing so little. I woke up and my eyebrows are almost totally gone. I can't remember anything. Grrrrrrrrr.
Sailor, I
cried like a baby when my trx was delayed. Totally normal reaction!0 -
I'm also having horrible hot flashes (no fever). Chemopause sucks.
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Also, I read an article about how the prognosis for women diagnosed within 5 yrs post partum is so much worse than for others. Really?!? Come on...
I also hate being told to "be positive." You go be positive, I'll be however I want to be. And I don't want to hear that it's my immune system or antibiotics that caused my cancer. Nor do I want to hear about the evils of chemo or radiation or about miracles in Tijuana. I've actually been to Tijuana. I wouldn't go there to have a hangnail treated. **end rant**
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Just put weekly Taxol #5 out of 12 "in the books" !
PA had given me a bit of a "nocebo" last week, telling me the Taxol SEs would get worse over time, psyching me out in a bad way.
So today I asked my nurse (who has been working onco many years) roughly what percentage of her patients tolerate Taxol well. Expected anything from 10% to 50%. She said "99%"! She went on to say her only Taxol patients who have a rough road are those on another drug that's a bad actor.
Re: husbands, mine is super supportive, kind, patient and sometimes maddeningly positive. I frame that as "I will be prepared for the worst and you help me remember I have a decent chance at a good outcome."
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Currently putting Taxol 3 of 4 in the books.
My husband tries to be supportive. He really does. With me somewhat out of commission, he a bit frantic to be superstar breadwinner (my earnings won't be as good this year, and expenses are higher). It generally takes him a day or two after really talking to him about what I need to see results. He needs a bit of time to process. But he does try.
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HI ladies,
I'm 5 days post chemo #5. I'm sooooo over this.
I'm weak, tired and really struggling with the big D and stomach issues. Everything tastes so horrible that I really don't want to eat anything at all. I wish I could come up with something to eat that is tolerable, something that I can choke down without it making me feel sick to my stomach.
I was taking an anti-nausea pill on Sunday night and I gagged on it. It made me throw up my entire dinner (that I had barely gotten down in the first place) since then I feel like I have a very active gag reflex. This really sucks!!
I'm so angry to hear how many people are struggling with support from their spouses. Mine is generally ok, but he does prefer to not address it and just muddle along to get through. I really hope that those of you not getting what you need from your husband set up a broader support network of friends and family so that you can get what you need. I also hope that seeing you get the support you need elsewhere will make an impact.
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You women make me smile! Thank you Lila-Claire for the starting the bopping husbands club and thanks to those who volunteered their services! You all are right. I have to pick my battle and my battle with be with cancer. My husband may come around, or maybe he won't, but I have to give 100% to fighting this awful disease. I had my 5th round today and when my nurse gave me my schedule she put a huge smiley face next to my chemo #6. Little things like that smiley face are so huge to me right now. She told my daughter to make sure and be there because we will celebrate. Thank you ladies for giving me strength and helping me to see the light and keeping me on the right path. I have to go take my Imodium and lomotil now because the poop fairy is sure to return for another lengthy stay. She gets on my nerves. Hope everyone has a good evening! Hugs to all!!
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Mom2boo- Many of us have TEs and will be doing radiation for 6 weeks with them in. Myself included. This PS sounds like he doesn't know what he's doing if he's saying you shouldn't. It's very common. My PS is going to over fill by 100 cc from the size I want it to be before I start radiation so if there is any shrinkage, it will compensate by having been stretched further than what I want. Also with TEs there is some damage done to them. You don't want to have your breast reconstruction done and then do radiation to damage possibly the perm inplant/work done.
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Southern- Guthy Renker doesn't sell authentic Wen products. There's nothing wrong with Wen if you get it from Chaz Dean or QVC. I've used Wen from QVC or Chaz Dean site for years and was told never to by from GR. No problems. Love the stuff. There's been other lawsuits in the past on Guthy Renker. We'll see if it pans out this time.
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I cant get much more bald so I'll stay away from the WEN.
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Momtoboo, My BS strongly felt that I needed to wait until a few months after radiation to have any reconstruction. My chest is boney, and because my tumor was large relative to breast size, there is no extra skin. Any infection would have delayed chemo. I healed from the mastectomy and ALND really quickly. TEs have a longer recovery time. Although it's not uncommon the have TEs during radiation, it is not the best choice for everyone. It wasn't for me. Ask your BS why delaying reonstruction is best for you, and definitely get more than one opinion especially if you're uncomfortable with this one. We are not one size fits all, and neither are our treatment decisions.
I have my 3rd DD Taxol today. The MO reduced my dose slightly for neuropathy andis concerned about my elevated blood sugar. No action taken yet, but seriously? There's no history of diabetes in my family, I'm healthy (well, other than this pesky cancer thing), and I'm not overweight. This may be chemo related, but generally is paired with other indications like weight loss and thrush. So we're going to wait and see for now. ARGH!
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Interesting. My sugars are always high and my MO had never said anything. The only time I got extra fluids was the first round when my calcium was high and we didn't know why. It continues to be high, but no extra fluids before chemo are needed.
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hi tkemp. I was on the exact same schedule as you, but moved to DD Taxol due to extremely low WBC, which delayed trx a week. Counts tend to stay low on Taxol, but hopefully will even out for you soon. Big hugs, it's a long road!
Mom, I have one TE but I think it's a different protocol when you have surgery first because you are healed by rads. So your PS makes sense to me. I've already been warned that my radiated foob (fake boob) will not match my other foob due to the scar tissue.
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I want to join the bopping husbands team! I had to have a long talk with mine. There is some improvement but it's not what I was hoping for. I often wonder if it's even possible to empathize with this level of stress.
While walking to Target today, I saw a young woman with 2 children, totally bald. I wanted to run up to her and take her to coffee and hear her story, but I hate it when people approach me with their cancer stories, so I held back. It made me realize how desperate I am for that connection.
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Hi everyone. So good to read your stories and see so many similar circumstances and feelings to mine. I'm getting my final DD Taxol on Thursday. Dreading it but happy to end this chemo shitmo. MO indicated she would be lowering dosage due to my neuropathy. I have acupuncture number 2 tomorrow. Hoping it will help.
Dang husbands who need bopping!!! 😁Fortunately, my DH has been exceptional. I am very lucky and tell him so regularly. This dang cancer has brought us closer and I think more loving on a daily basis. There is pretty much no sex so holding hands and showing kindness to each other is even more important. I have realized how much I truly love that man. 😢
I have had a low and continually dropping hemoglobin. MO ordered an iron test at last lab. It checked three elements of iron in my blood. All were within range so that was good news. If they were low I think they would have considered an iron infusion. I didn't know there was such a thing as an iron test so wanted to share.
Like many of you, any hair I had left after AC had definitely disappeared. Did someone say they lost their remaining lashes and brows after chemo was complete? I though perhaps I might make it through with just a severe thinning.
Thanks for sharing all your stories. Peace and love to all.
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Congrats on finishing up, Shelly! Yes, as to the hair loss, but there is always hope.:)
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Another #5 of 12 weekly Taxols checked off here today in Minnesota! Congrats to those of you finishing up!!
I would be curious to know, if folks are willing to share, how many of us have dense breasts? And if you do have dense breasts, were you receiving ultrasounds in addition to Mammograms? I was told I do have dense breasts, and I understand some states are now required to notify you to make you aware that you might need ultrasounds in addition to Mammograms. At least that's my understanding of the notification that went into effect here in MN recently, albeit a little late for me. I also read on breastcancer..org that dense breasts can be 6% more likely to develop cancer.
I'm sorry to hear about the lack of support some of you are receiving from hubby's, or in general, dangit, that's just not how it should be. Please know you deserve to be supported, and supported well during this time.
Well another sleepless, hotflashin' night and I have a work presentation first thing in the morning with the big boss. Luckily i can do it from home, in my pj's and bad hair, but it might be hard to hide the chemobrain
Did someone say "cruise"?
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To all those finishing chemo congratulations you got through it. To everyone else we're getting closer to finishing☺☺☺
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